“To the casino?”
She nodded.
He thought back. “A few of us went to the Red Wolf about three years ago. Yeah, I think it was about that long ago. Levon was still alive.”
“That was before I started working as a bartender there. I’ve only been there about six months.”
“Really? Only six months?”
“I did other things for a while. That was back when I lived in Seattle.”
He frowned. “Seattle? That’s where you’ve been?”
She looked down at the floor is hiding her embarrassment. “I’ve been all over. But I wanted to see the ocean. I just woke up one day and decided that I had to see the ocean. So I went. And while I was there I saw the redwood trees.”
“That’s nice.”
“It wasn’t. There was beauty around me and I didn’t see it. Ever. That’s one of the things I regret the most. I would pick myself up and go to a new place all the time thinking things would be different. It never was. At first everything was a big distraction. But as soon as that sameness of doing a job and living in the same place alone settled in, everything would change. Old memories would creep back and it would be as if I never left.”
“Was it really that hard to remember?”
“Yes. I know you don’t know why. But it was. I started going to therapy when I was in Seattle. I tried to run from it. I move to Olympia and then to… Oh, it doesn’t matter. I moved around.” She laughed and touched her cheek. “It drove Dr. Matthews crazy. I had years of therapy but nothing really kicked in until I came back to Montana six months ago.”
Hunter stared into her eyes. “Would you have come back if Caleb hadn’t found you, Julie?” he asked. “You can tell me the truth.”
“I honestly don’t know. I don’t. But I’m here now.”
“Thank you for being honest.”
She turned to the paintings again as the weight of emotion bubbled up her chest. “You should show these at the festival.”
“What? Are you crazy?”
She chuckled at the expression on his face. “Why not? These are really good. There will be lots of artists there.”
He sputtered. “No.”
“Why not?”
“Because.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’m being serious and you’re giving me a stupid answer.”
He turned around and walked away. Then he stopped and turned to her. “I’m giving you an answer. Maybe not the one you expected but it’s still an answer.”
She followed him into the kitchen. “Because is not an answer. That’s an I-have-to-think-of-an-excuse-before-I-can-come-up-with-a-real-answer type of answer.”
He turned to her. “The answer is still no.”
“But they’re great. Why wouldn’t you want to show them off?”
“We just went through the reason why.”
“You have a gift. This is something special. You work with horses because you love them and it’s your job. You paint for pleasure.”
“It’s just something I do.”
“It’s your therapy. It’s something that you love to do. Why wouldn’t you want to share that?”
“Why is this important to you?”
She propped her hands on her hips and fought to find the words. “Because life gives us surprises sometimes. And this is a big surprise.”
Sweet Montana Secrets: Chapter Six
It had taken some doing, but Julie had finally gotten Hunter to agree to show a few of his paintings with a local woman he knew would be selling pottery at the festival. She was a client of his and he promised he would talk to her about it.
She drove back to Caleb’s apartment feeling good for the first time. She knew Hunter was avoiding all talk about the baby. Maybe he understood how painful it was for her. Or maybe she was reading too much into those paintings she’d seen.
She loved him. She knew she did. It had never gone away and that had been clear tonight when they’d finally broken through a wall she’d put up for herself years ago.
She parked the car in the parking lot and reached into the back seat for her purse. After rummaging through the purse, she remembered.
Dropping her purse in her lap, she groaned. “I can’t believe I forgot the key.”
Twenty minutes later, Julie saw headlights pulling into the parking lot of Caleb’s apartment. Caleb pulled his truck in right next to her parking spot. She could already tell by the look on his face he was not exactly happy with her.
She took a deep breath and climbed out of her car.
“Roll up your window,” he ground out in that big brother way he did when he wanted to order her around. Yep, he was upset.
“I’m sorry. I can’t believe I forgot my key.” She reached inside the car, turned the key in the ignition just enough so she could use the power window button on the door to roll up the window, and then turned the key again, and pulled it out of the ignition.
She slammed the car door as she turned, and saw him scowling down at her.
“I said I was sorry,” she said quickly. “I guess I called at a bad time, huh?”
“You owe me.”
“Get it line. You’re not the only one who feels that way.”
“What were you doing anyway?”
Julie didn’t want to tell Caleb about going over to Hunter’s apartment after learning the news about Margaret. She wasn’t ready to talk about it. She wasn’t sure exactly what she was feeling. Time had moved on, and yet, it hadn’t and the shifting back and forth made her unsteady.
“I was hungry. I got a sub to eat.”
He turned and looked at her hands as they walked. “Yeah? Where is it? Lock the car door. This may be Sweet, but we just had some break-ins in town a few weeks ago.”
Just as they got to the porch stairs, she turned and pressed the button to lock her car. “Um, I ate my sub there.”
“Did you see anyone you knew in town?”
Panic filled her. “Why would you ask that?”
Caleb chuckled as they climbed the porch stairs. “A lot of people you went to school with still live in Sweet, Julie. You’re bound to run into someone you know.”
“Oh. No.”
“Huh. I usually see people all the time.” He unlocked the apartment door and stood aside. “Do me a favor. Get the key I left for you on the table and put it on your key ring. I don’t want you making a habit of this.”
She rolled her eyes. “Bossy.”
“I’m heading back there.”
She flipped on the light switch and swung around. “You are?”
He frowned as he looked down at her. “You don’t mind, do you?”
“Of course not.”
“Is everything okay, Julie?”
“Yes.”
“Are you sure?”
She cocked her head to one side. “I’m exhausted, and now I’m fed. I’ll probably fall right to sleep. Even on your sofa.”
“Take the bed. The sofa is not comfortable.”
“You can say that again. But it’s better than the floor.”
He smiled as he turned away and headed down the porch stairs. “Call me if you need me. But make sure it’s tomorrow morning, okay?”
“Sorry!”
He turned back and smiled up at her from the bottom of the stairs.
Julie shut the door and locked it. Sweet was a small town but they had a lot of tourists who came through town. They always had when she was growing up. Her parents had drilled it into her head that she was to lock the door whenever she was alone because you never knew who was lurking outside.
When she’d been in junior high school, there had been a kidnapping in the next town. A girl her age had been riding her bike to her friend’s house and never made it there. Two days later the police found the girl’s bike. A month later, they found the body.
It had shaken Julie to the core. It had made her parents obsessive about her safety. It was all people could talk about in town and at school for months. They never
found who did it and eventually everyone stopped talking about it and moved on with life. But the fear of it never truly went away.
Once the door was secure, she walked into the kitchen, grabbed the key Caleb had left for her on the table and put it on her keychain so she wouldn’t forget it again. She looked down at the card from Edmund, picked it up and then tucked it in her purse so Caleb wouldn’t see it.
She’d taken the week off to move to Sweet. She hadn’t really needed to since she didn’t have all that much to move. But she wasn’t used to having all this time on her hands.
The knock on the door startled her as she dropped her keys into her purse. Heading to the door, she shook her head.
“See? I’m not the only one who forgets things, Caleb,” she said as she unlocked the door. Yanking it open, she added, “So what did you forget?”
She sucked in a quick breath with surprise.
“I’m not, Caleb,” Hunter said. He had both hands rested on either side of the door jam.
She replayed what had just happened in her mind as the initial fright at not seeing her brother was replaced with anticipation at seeing Hunter.
“I thought it was, Caleb.”
“I got that,” he said smiling. “Why would he knock on his own apartment door?”
She shrugged. Of course, he wouldn’t. Everything she’d learned about safety had gone out the window with that one move.
“He was just here,” Julie said. “You didn’t see him pull out of the parking lot when you pulled in?”
Hunter shook his head. “I didn’t see him. I was thinking about you.”
And he was looking at her. She remembered that look. His dark eyes were almost black as he stood on the porch staring at her with appreciation she recognized and missed.
“Did you come by to see if my brother’s apartment is as bachelorfide as yours is?”
He shook his head. “I did forget something though.”
“Oh? What is that?”
He reached out his arm and hooked it around her waist, pulling her to him. “I forgot this,” he said in a deep voice that made her body hum and her mind go blank.
His mouth came down over hers and instantly transformed her to a time when she felt no pain and everything about life had possibilities. She melted in his arms as he moved her closer, crushing his lips against hers and breathing deeply as if drinking all of her into him.
Reaching up, she touched his cheek and felt his warm skin and slight stubble of hair. He kissed her deeply and with meaning she felt deep in her heart and soul. And when he pulled away from her, he breathed in deep again as if needing a last drop of water to sustain him. He didn’t let go. He just held her close as memories swirled around in her brain.
“I’ve missed you, Julie,” he whispered, looking down at her with a gaze she wanted to fall into and never leave. “I miss the way you feel in my arms.”
“Hunter.”
“What?”
“I don’t know if this is a good idea.”
She meant it. She wanted him to kiss her and hold her this way. Oh, how she’d missed this. But there was still so much he didn’t know. There were things he deserved to know but she found so hard to speak of.
“I’ve changed, Julie. I’m not the man I was.”
“I believe that. I do. I’m not the girl I used to be either.”
She took a step back. She could still feel his mouth on hers. She could still taste him. She saw the confusion in his expression when their eyes met again.
“There are things you don’t know about…about what happened,” she said.
“I know.”
Panic filled her. “Wha…what do you know?”
He closed his eyes briefly as if trying to hide his pain. When he opened them again, it was as if he were steeling himself for what he had to say.
“I’m not stupid, Julie. If you had had the baby, you would have moved home with a child. And since you’re here without our child you must have… Oh, God, I don’t even know. I don’t know if you had the baby or not.”
Her heart ached so much she swore she could physically feel it tear in two.
“I can’t talk about this now. Please don’t make me.”
He nodded. “Okay. We don’t have to talk about it tonight. I just wanted to come here and…”
“Kiss me?”
He smiled. “Yes. I hoped you wouldn’t slam the door in my face when I did it.”
“I kissed you back. When have I ever slammed the door in your face?” Her mind raced back ten years. “Never mind. Don’t answer that.”
He sighed. “I deserved it that day. That was the day you saw me using.”
“I don’t want to ruin this talking about the past. We were both wrong.”
They were still standing at the doorway with the door open. Mosquitos and moths were flying around the porch light. One very large moth took the open door as an invitation to fly into the apartment.
“It’s okay,” he said. “You don’t have to invite me in.”
“You can come in. It’s just…”
“I said it was okay,” he said quietly. “Let’s just leave it like this for tonight. We can talk about all the rest another time. Does that sound good?”
She nodded. “Goodnight, Hunter.”
He smiled as he turned away and started down the stairs. “Personally, I think you don’t want me to come in because you want me to think it’s your brother that is the slob when it’s really you.”
She chuckled. “What?”
“I remember what your bedroom looked like, Julie Samuel. You were a mess too.”
Her mouth dropped open. “You never minded it back then.”
“I still don’t.”
She watched him walk to his truck and climb inside. The door was still wide open. She didn’t care about the moths or the mosquitos even though she knew they’d feast on her in the apartment all night. She didn’t want to take her eyes off Hunter.
When she finally shut the door and locked it, she put her hand to her lips. She’d missed him too.
Oh, good God, she was in trouble.
* * *
Julie spent the next day thinking of nothing but Hunter. She still had a few more days off before she had to start work again. She hadn’t talked to Hunter about what came after. After the kiss.
Of course, they’d done so much more than kiss in the past and those memories were burned in her memory. But that was a long time ago. Some people believed that time healed all wounds. Julie wasn’t exactly sure that she believed that. People grew and learned to move on and accepted the mistakes of the past.
She wasn’t exactly sure where that left her today. Or if there was any future to move on for her and Hunter without ripping a Band-Aid off a wound she’d fought long and hard to cover up.
But the feelings she’d been feeling for Hunter were real. It wasn’t just memories. She loved him. There was no doubt in her mind that she’d always love him. She’d tried so hard to force her feelings into a box and she knew she had failed. Hunter Williams had always been in her heart. She wasn’t sure if anyone else would ever have a chance to take the place that he alone claimed. That much was evident the night when he’d kissed her on the porch.
Hunter had been busy working. He’d called and told her he wanted to see her but that he had a full day of shoeing to get through. She’d been invited over to see the chapel house that night, but Julie had little to do but wander around town until then. Caleb was at work. Katie had already moved into the chapel and was busy setting up house.
Julie had to admit that she was excited to see the progress that had been made. She still couldn’t imagine what Katie and Caleb had managed to transform that old dilapidated chapel into. She remembered it from high school, as many of the kids in the area did. But tonight she would have an opportunity to go over and see what had her brother so excited.
She needed a housewarming gift. Julie couldn’t go over for dinner and not have something to give as a gi
ft. So she drove down Main Street and found a little novelty shop across from the hardware store called Sweet Sensations.
She walked through the door and pulled off her sunglasses so she could get a better look at everything the store had to offer.
“Welcome,” the young girl behind the bakery counter said. Julie wasn’t sure if she had ever been that young. Obviously she had been. But she couldn’t remember ever being that bubbly. The girl looked to be about eight or ten years younger than Julie was. “Are you looking for something special?”
Julie continued to look around as she walked toward the bakery counter. “I need a housewarming gift.”
“Then you came to the right place. I’m Dixie,” the girl said with a wide smile. “We have a lot of nice things for the house. What kind of mood is the house?”
“Excuse me? Mood?”
“Yes. Décor? Mood? Theme? I’m not as good at putting things together. Tara really has that eye for decorating. She’s in the back in the office. I can get her for you if you’d like some help. I’m more of an… eclectic type of designer.”
Julie thought for a second. “To be honest, I don’t have a clue. It’s an old chapel that’s been renovated here in town. You might know which one I’m talking about.”
The girls eyes widened with excitement. “Yes, I do! It’s the one the police officer is working on with his girlfriend up on Lookout Ridge.”
“Yes, that’s the one.”
“Now I know I need to get Tara for this. She knows the place.”
“Tara?”
“Yeah, Tara Mitchell. Do you know her?” The girl rolled her eyes. Then added, “Of course you know her. Everyone knows Tara around here.”
The girl disappeared into the back of the room, and within a few seconds, a woman came breezing out of the back room into the showroom.
“Hi, I’m Tara. Dixie said you needed some help finding something for the chapel house?”
“I’m Julie Samuel. Caleb Samuel’s sister.”
Tara’s face grew brighter. “Love that guy.”
“Excuse me?”
“Your brother. He’s one of the police officers in town who was so helpful when we were broken into last month. Great guy.”
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