by Rick R. Reed
It’s August, and I’m thinking of that painting by the French impressionist Georges Seurat where a bunch of people are gathered leisurely in a riverfront park. You might think of it as Sunday in the Park with George, after Sondheim’s Broadway musical. But its proper name is A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte. No matter. The point is, a bunch of us are together here, and as I gaze at these people I love, I think of the same joy and contentment I see when I look at that painting. Just being. Happy. Nature. People you care about. And of course, good food.
I’ve been back home—and that’s truly how I think of it now—for almost ten months. So much has happened in that time that Seattle and my old husband, Ross, seem like distant memories, longer ago than the space of less than a year. Looking around me at my father, Maisie, Mary Beth and Brad, Grace, and my person—Jackson—it feels like I’ve always been in this little town by the river. My roots, once separated, have taken hold again. They’ve bloomed and flourished into vibrant green life.
I lie back and close my eyes, reveling in the sun’s warmth on my face, smelling the slightly fishy tang of the river a few yards away, and listening to the soft tinkling of Peterson’s piano. It’s a perfect moment.
And then a snorting snout is thrust into my face. A fat tongue licks a great swipe across my partly opened lips and nose.
“Damn it, Ruth!” I sit up, laughing, and push my girl away. She runs from me, daring me to give chase.
“I’ve got her, Uncle Beau.”
My niece, Grace, swings her long, curly hair over one shoulder and runs after Ruth. As the two run, Grace flings a bright yellow tennis ball ahead of her, and Ruth amazes me once more with her facility for speed, her agility. I don’t know how she does it with that squat little body and those short legs.
I shake my head at the pair, laughing at their antics. I watch as they stumble down the riverbank. Grace watches as Ruth sniffs along the water’s edge.
In the water, Maisie stands, her jeans rolled up to just below her knees. My father stands a little behind, one hand protectively on her back. He is schooling her in the art of skipping stones. Maisie moved in with him last month, and sometimes when I’m over there, I get a little choked up, watching the two of them bicker in the kitchen or slyly hold hands while they watch TV in the living room. Maisie still reminds me of my mom, but yet she’s not a replacement. Maisie is her own woman. It’s good to see Dad happy, when I thought for so long he never would be again. He’d always taken the death of our mother harder than he let on. Even though I’d never seen him cry—that was for sissies like me—I sensed a piece of him had gone missing when Mom passed. Even though that piece may have not been restored, Dad knew love again. That made all the difference.
And I had love too.
“Happy?” Jackson asks. He lies beside me on the blanket. I glance over at him. The change in him still takes my breath away. He’s gained twenty pounds, for one, and the weight looks good. He’s still lean and fit, but he’s vital, manly, alive. He’s shorn his blond hair very short, buzzed on the sides and back, but leaves the top long and silky. He’s forever pushing a lock of it out of his eyes, which I find both incredibly annoying and incredibly sexy. His face even looks younger. Over the past few months, as he shared and exorcised the horror of what had happened to him with a therapist up in Pittsburgh and with me too, the lines of anxiety that were present when I met him have softened. Some have even vanished. His eyes, once red-rimmed and yellowish, now are clear and bright—the ice blue I can’t seem to tear my own eyes away from.
You might be thinking he’s a different person, but he’s not. He’s simply restored—the Jackson I fell in love with on that snowy night so many years ago. Sometimes I think about fate and believe he and I were meant to be. That makes sense to me, because I know now, and get it verified every time he kisses me, every time he absentmindedly lays a hand on my knee when we’re driving somewhere, every time he throws a leg over mine as we slumber, too close, on my—now our—bed, that Jackson and I were meant for each other, right from the beginning. The road was tortuous, the path twisted, but it could only lead us in one direction—back to each other.
“Happy? Oh yes. More than I can put into words.”
He kisses me lightly. And I can’t help it, I cast a quick, guilty glance out at the river, toward Dad, to see if he noticed. I chastise myself and believe it’s that kind of thinking, that kind of self-loathing, that has no place here.
I kiss Jackson back, letting my hands frame his stubbly, tanned face. This time when I look out at the water, both Maisie and my father are looking. But instead of frowns and disapproval, I see only love and smiles. Dramatically, my father ups the ante by grabbing Maisie, bending her back, and planting a big one right on the mouth.
We laugh.
“Everyone must be getting hungry,” I say to Jackson, making moves to head for the coolers I’ve lugged across the road.
“Yeah, but for what?” Jackson asks, fleetingly touching my thigh.
I feel heat rush to my cheeks. “Later,” I whisper. “Help me put the food out.”
And he does. As everyone gathers closer, I lay out the feast—cold Italian roast chicken; a wilted spinach, egg, and bacon salad; another salad of dandelion greens; burdock fritters with Parmesan; peppers, egg, and potatoes fried up together; and last but not least, an apple pie with walnuts, raisins, and a touch of real maple syrup. The first and the last things—the chicken and the pie—were taken from my mom’s recipes. In a way, having the foods she’d make for picnics and family reunions growing up was like having her here.
She’d never left us.
And that’s the thing—love endures.
THE END
Glossary of Recipes
Everything-but-the-Kitchen-Sink Minestrone
2 T extra-virgin olive oil
1 onion, diced
4 garlic cloves, minced
1 cup diced potato (peeled or unpeeled, your choice; I like the skin)
2 carrots, diced
1 medium zucchini or yellow squash, diced
1 cup fresh green beans, ends trimmed and halved
1 t dried thyme
1 t dried basil
1/4 t crushed red pepper flakes
1 bay leaf
1 can (15 ounces) diced tomatoes in juice with Italian seasonings
4 cups chicken stock
4 cups mushroom stock (or all chicken stock, or use vegetable if you want to keep truly vegetarian)
1 can (15 ounces) cannellini beans
Salt and pepper, to taste
Grated Parmesan cheese, optional
Pesto, optional
Heat oil over medium heat. Add the onion and garlic and sauté, stirring, for five minutes. Add potato, carrots, zucchini, and green beans and cook until the vegetables are just beginning to soften. Add the bay leaf, crushed red pepper, tomatoes, thyme, basil, and stock. Bring to a boil. Reduce to simmer for as little as 15 minutes and up to 45 minutes. (Longer is better, in my book, but keep it at a simmer and give it a stir once in a while.) Add cannellini beans and warm through. Taste and adjust seasonings if necessary with salt and pepper.
Serve topped with Parmesan and a dollop of your favorite pesto. Serves 6-8.
Sweet Potato Chili
A little olive oil
1 lb. lean ground beef or turkey
1 poblano pepper, seeded and chopped into small dice
1 large yellow onion, chopped fine
Three cloves fresh garlic, minced
2 T chili powder
2 t ground cumin
2 cans (4 ounce) diced mild green chiles with juice
1 can (14.5 ounce) petite diced tomatoes, fire-roasted if you can find them
1 can (8 ounce) tomato sauce
2 cans (10.5 ounce)beef consommé or beef broth
1 large sweet potato, cubed
2 bay leaves
Salt and fresh ground pepper to taste
Heat olive oil in a Dutch oven, add ground
meat, and cook over medium-high heat until browned. Drain and remove the meat to a bowl. Add a little more oil and add the pepper and onions and sauté until soft and fragrant, about 3-4 minutes. Add your garlic and sauté for another minute.
Throw in everything else, stir to blend, and reduce heat to low. Let chili simmer for an hour before serving. Taste and adjust seasoning, adding more salt and pepper if needed. Serve with sour cream, shredded cheese, and if you want it a little hotter, Tabasco or other hot sauce.
Serves 6.
Dark Beer and Beef Stew
Some bacon grease
2-3 lbs. stew meat, cubed
Salt and pepper for the meat
4 carrots, chopped
2 parsnips, chopped
1 turnip, chopped
3 big cloves of garlic, minced
4 onions, quartered
1 t each of the following dried herbs: marjoram, tarragon, basil, herbes de Provence
2 bay leaves
2 cups beef stock or 2 cans (10.5 ounces) beef consommé
12 ounces of a good dark beer, like Guinness
1/4 cup water and 1/4 cup flour
More salt and fresh ground pepper to taste
Put your bacon grease in a Dutch oven and let it melt down over medium-high heat. Salt and pepper your stew meat and add it to the hot fat. Sear, turning to brown all sides, in batches if necessary. Remove to plate or bowl. In the same grease, throw in your veggies and onions. Let them soften for a few minutes, then add in your herbs and bay leaves. Finally, pour in your stock and your beer. (Suggestion: drink a beer to match the one you’re cooking with.)
Simmer for an hour to an hour and a half, until the liquid is reduced and concentrated and the beef is tender. At this point, mix your flour and water and add to the pan to thicken the sauce. Serve hot.
Serves 6.
Glazed Pork Chops
4 pork bone-in chops
2 T brown sugar
1 t garlic powder
1 t onion powder
1 t thyme
1 1/2 t salt
1/2 t ground black pepper
2 T olive oil, divided
1 cup apple cider vinegar (I like Bragg’s)
4 T maple syrup
1 T stone-ground mustard
Preheat oven to 400°F.
In a small pan, whisk together apple cider vinegar, maple syrup, and mustard. Bring to a boil, and then reduce to a simmer. Cook until thick—about 10 minutes.
In a bowl combine sugar, garlic powder, onion powder, thyme, 1 teaspoon of salt, and pepper. Add 1 tablespoon of oil and mix with a fork until it’s a paste.
Pat the pork chops dry with paper towels, and pat on the spice rub so the chops are covered on both sides.
Heat the remaining tablespoon of olive oil in a large cast-iron skillet (or other oven-proof skillet) over medium-high heat.
When sizzling, add pork chops and sear on both sides, about 2 minutes per side.
Place in the oven and roast for about 5 minutes.
Remove pork chops from the oven, pour glaze over them, return in the oven, and bake for another 5 minutes. Sprinkle with remaining 1/2 t salt before serving.
Serves 4.
Jackson’s Spicy Gnocchi
8 oz. potato gnocchi
1/4 cup good olive oil, more or less
3 large garlic cloves, minced
3 anchovy filets
1 t red pepper flakes, more or less
1/4 cup grated Parmigiano-Reggiano
1/4 cup pasta cooking water
Salt and pepper to taste (seriously—to taste! With the salty anchovies and the red pepper, you may not need either)
Bring a large pot of water to a boil. Add plenty of salt when you first see bubbles appear.
Heat a large skillet over medium-high heat. Add in olive oil and allow it to get warmed up, a couple of minutes. Throw in your minced garlic and lower the heat. Allow the garlic to simmer and become aromatic, but be careful that it doesn’t begin to brown—you don’t want that bitterness. Add in the anchovy filets and cook for a couple more minutes. You should be able to break up the filets with a wooden spoon, and they should magically vanish into the garlic-flavored oil. Trust me, this will not taste fishy. Throw in your red pepper flakes.
Add gnocchi to boiling water and cook until they rise to the surface of the water. Do not overcook! This will only take a couple of minutes. Remove from water with a strainer and set aside. Reserve 1/4 cup of the water you cooked the gnocchi in.
At this point, you can dump the gnocchi in the pan with the seasoned olive oil. Toss pasta to coat with the oil and add your Parmesan. Toss some more, so every gnocchi is coated.
Add in your reserved pasta water a little at a time. You want to loosen up the sauce a bit with this, make it creamier. Your eye will guide you when to stop adding water. You won’t need the whole 1/4 cup.
Serve hot. Serves 4.
White Trash Mac & Cheese
8 oz. elbow macaroni
1/2 cup sour cream
1/2 cup cream cheese, softened
1 1/2 cups shredded cheddar
1 cup frozen peas, thawed
1 can tuna (5 ounce) preferably albacore, packed in olive oil)
1 t red pepper flakes, more or less
Salt and pepper to taste
Preheat oven to 350.
Bring a large pot of water to a boil. Add plenty of salt when you first see bubbles appear.
In a bowl, combine sour cream, cream cheese, and 1/2 cup of the cheddar. Fold in peas and tuna. Sprinkle with some red pepper flakes, as little or as much as your tolerance allows. Taste and see if it needs some salt and pepper.
Drain pasta after it’s finished cooking according to package directions. Make sure to cook al dente or even a little under (it will cook more in the oven). Add to cheese mixture. Pour macaroni and cheese into a greased baking dish (butter is a nice way to grease a dish). Top with remaining cheddar and bake for 20-30 minutes or until cheese is melted and golden brown.
Serve hot. Serves 2.
Fiesta Pot Roast
3 T olive oil, divided
3 lb. chuck roast
1 medium onion, diced
3 garlic cloves, minced
1 T thyme
1 T onion powder
1 T garlic powder
1 T chili powder
A splash of red wine or red wine vinegar
1 8-oz. jar good-quality salsa (whatever’s your favorite)
2 4-oz. cans mild green chiles
1 can beef consommé
Salt and pepper to taste
Get out your slow cooker. Get out a big skillet, pour in 2 T olive oil, heat until shimmering over medium-high heat. Rub roast all over with seasonings. Place into hot pan and sear each side, about 30 seconds to a minute per side. Remove and set aside. In the same pan, add remaining tablespoon of oil, throw in onions and, after a minute or so, garlic. Salt, stir, and wait until garlic and onion are softened and fragrant but not brown. Remove onions and garlic and set aside. Deglaze pan with wine or vinegar, scraping up browned bits of meat from the bottom.
While this is cooking, reduce one can beef consommé down to about half in a small pan.
Put roast into slow cooker. Pour ¾ of the salsa over the roast. Pour in consommé, onions, garlic, and scrapings and liquid from bottom of pan you browned the roast in. Add in chiles.
Cover and cook on low for eight hours. When done, add salt and pepper to taste. Remove meat, set aside. Pour liquid (removing fat if you want) into a pan and add in remaining salsa, stir and cook down over high heat, until reduced by half.
Serve hot with sauce. Serves 4-6.
Fancy-Schmancy Carrot Soup
1 T olive oil
6 large carrots, peeled, and roughly chopped
2 garlic cloves, minced
2 shallots, minced
2 t cumin
1 t ground coriander
1 t fresh ginger, grated
32 oz. chicken or vegetable stock
1 T harissa (or more to taste)
1/2 cup heavy cream
Salt and pepper to taste
In Dutch oven or large soup pot, heat olive oil until shimmering. Add in carrots, shallots, and garlic and sauté briefly, until fragrant and just beginning to soften.
Add in stock and reduce heat to medium low. Add in cumin, coriander, and ginger. Throw in some salt and pepper. Simmer for 20 minutes to a half hour. Remove from heat. Let cool.
Pour soup into a blender, add in harissa, and pulse until it’s smooth and creamy.
Reheat just before serving and stir in cream at that time. Taste and add more salt and pepper if needed.
Serve hot. Serves 4.
Sicilian Roast Chicken
1 3-4 lb. chicken, cut up
1 T thyme
1 T onion powder
1 T garlic powder
1 T dried basil
1 T dried oregano
Kosher salt
Fresh ground black pepper
1/4 stick of butter
1/4 cup of olive oil
Preheat oven to 425F. Rinse chicken parts and pat dry. Put in roasting pan. Melt butter either in your microwave or in a small saucepan. Add in olive oil. Brush this mixture onto all chicken parts, coating generously. Sprinkle salt, pepper, onion and garlic powder, and dried herbs over all. Place in preheated oven and roast for 40 minutes or until a meat thermometer reads 190F.
Serve hot or cold. (The latter is great at a picnic!)
Serves 4.
ABOUT RICK R. REED
Rick R. Reed draws inspiration from the lives of gay men to craft stories that quicken the heartbeat, engage emotions, and keep the pages turning. Although he dabbles in horror, dark suspense, and comedy, his attention always returns to the power of love.
He’s the award-winning and bestselling author of more than fifty works of published fiction and is forever at work on yet another book. Lambda Literary has called him “a writer that doesn’t disappoint…”
Rick lives in Palm Springs, CA, with his beloved husband and their fierce Chihuahua/Shiba Inu mix.