The restaurant was just a glorified diner. It smelled like bacon grease, coffee, and bleach, not the most enticing combination. Lyssa smiled at the hostess and spoke quickly, waving to a slender woman in black already seated at a table, then leading Theo and the boy into a booth in the back corner.
“I have to tell her that we’ll be a few minutes late. Have a coffee or something.” Then she was gone, hurrying across the restaurant.
She was more flustered than he’d ever seen her before.
This was really important.
Theo studied the woman in black, who glanced up from her phone with a smile to talk to Lyssa. Who was she and why was Lyssa meeting her?
Theo’s gaze flicked to the boy again, who was studying him. “Coffee?” he asked. “Milk?”
“I just had breakfast, thanks.”
“Me, too.” Theo thanked the waitress and she went to another table.
The boy leaned across the table. “Aren’t you Theo Tremblay?” he asked and Theo was surprised again.
“I am. How did you know my name? That picture?”
“Partly,” the boy admitted. “I saw it this morning on Mom’s social media. But you were in the pop-ups. Mom told me your name then.”
“I came to see your mom about that same picture.”
“You must have wanted to kiss her.”
“I did. But I didn’t expect to become famous for it.”
“That’s how it works.” The boy smiled. “She’s famous. Everyone gets their picture taken with her and then they get famous.” He shrugged, clearly accustomed to this particular price of fame.
“Have you had your picture taken with her?”
“No, because Mom always fixes it. She knows all the regular photographers. She doesn’t want my picture taken and neither do I.”
This was what Kyle meant. Theo found it a little startling that this boy understood a part of the world better than he did. “How does she fix it?”
“She tells them that kids need their privacy, blah blah blah, and sometimes she tells one of them something before the others know it. It’s never anything very interesting. Like she’s going to model for some designer at fashion week. Something like that. But they get to know first and they like that enough to not publish pictures of me.” He shrugged, both jaded and indifferent to the demands of the press. “You should have expected it.”
“Apparently so, but I didn’t.” Theo offered his hand. “I’m guessing you might be Logan.”
“That’s right.” The boy’s smile flashed and Theo saw Lyssa’s mischief in his expression. “Logan Monroe,” he confided and put his hand in Theo’s. He had a firmer handshake than Theo might have expected. “How do you know my name?”
Theo thought he shouldn’t mention the Christmas present. “Your mom mentioned it once, but didn’t explain,” he said instead.
Logan grinned. “Mystery solved.”
Theo smiled back. “Exactly.”
“Mom said you’re English. Is that true?”
Theo felt his brows rise.
“When we watched the first pop-up video for Flatiron Five.” Logan rolled his eyes. “She watches them all, every night after I go to bed, over and over again, just like Simon with Selena Gomez. She thinks I don’t know. I mean, duh.”
Theo fought a smile that Logan wasn’t so easily fooled. He also liked that Lyssa had been watching him. It made him feel that her insistence that only the physical mattered might not be all of the truth, and he liked that. “I was born in England. I came here for college and stayed.”
“Where did you live? London? I’ve been there.”
“We lived there when I was little, but then we moved. My parents live in Manchester now. My dad is a police officer and my mum is a teacher.”
Logan glanced toward Lyssa and Theo wondered how much the boy knew or had guessed. “Do you know anything about me already?” Logan shook his head. “So, we’re in the dark together,” Theo said.
Logan frowned. “How come I never heard of you before this Christmas? I mean, if you’re friends with Mom.”
“I haven’t seen her for a long time, probably since before you were born.”
“She said she knew you in college.” Logan surveyed Theo.
“All true.”
Lyssa returned then and slipped into the booth beside Logan. She glanced at her son, then at Theo. “You’ve probably both figured it out already,” she said, an appeal in her eyes. “I’m sorry, Theo. This isn’t how I wanted to do this.” She swallowed and looked flustered, so much like the Lyssa he’d known once-upon-a-time that he was tempted to console her. “I’ve planned out a thousand ways to say it, but none of them ever seemed right, which is why I never told you.”
“It’s what you wanted to tell me in that hour, right?”
“Right.” Lyssa looked miserable.
Theo nodded, his throat tight. “How old are you, Logan?”
Logan glanced up at his mom, who nodded approval. “I was ten in September.”
Theo sat back and inhaled. In April, it would be eleven years since he’d last seen Lyssa. He had to fight his anger with her for not telling him sooner that he had a son.
Then he wondered why he was bothering.
“Did you know that day?” he asked her, keeping his tone temperate with an effort.
“No, not yet.” Lyssa dropped her gaze. “I found out in April.”
“You didn’t think it was worth a call?”
“I should have told you, I know, but I just couldn’t.” Her hair was pulled back into a braid, but she pushed her hand through it and some of the strands came free. She looked down at Logan.
“You mean you just didn’t.”
She met Theo’s gaze, looking young and vulnerable. “I thought you might...have expectations and I couldn’t have endured that.”
She’d thought he might want her to terminate the pregnancy.
Even the suggestion took Theo’s breath away. “I wouldn’t,” he whispered with heat. “Never!” He was well aware that Logan was listening, but his son didn’t look shocked at all. He looked interested and a little mystified.
“You said once that you didn’t want family until you were older, maybe not at all. You always joked that your sister could have the babies.” She spoke quickly but Theo interrupted her.
“That’s different. We all have ideas of how things will be, especially in college, but that can change when circumstances change.”
Her gaze locked with his. “Would it have?”
“Yes. It would have changed everything. You should have told me.”
Lyssa exhaled and Theo saw that she truly had been concerned. Theo had always believed Lyssa to be fearless but he could almost respect that the one thing she feared was losing her child.
But she’d had almost eleven years to tell him the truth.
He would have married her—or asked, at least.
It was dizzying to think how different his life would have been, but he wouldn’t have regretted it. Not one bit.
Theo had a son. He’d had a son for a decade and hadn’t known the truth because Lyssa had hidden it from him.
He’d missed so much. Logan’s birth. His first steps. His first words. Theo felt cheated and that made him furious.
Never mind his parents. Theo’s dad had survived a heart attack two years before. It had been a very close thing. What if he’d never known he had another grandson?
The more Theo thought about it, the angrier he got.
“Lyssa, it wasn’t fair to any of us to keep this a secret,” he managed to say.
“I know that now. Then, I was young and foolish.” She met his gaze again. “I’m sorry, Theo.”
Theo was spared from replying by Logan. “Tell me,” he said, as if he already knew. “Say it out loud, Mom.”
Lyssa glanced at Theo and he nodded once, intrigued that she asked his permission now. “Theo’s your dad,” she said quietly.
Logan wasn’t surprised, which maybe said s
omething about how many relationships Lyssa had had. It might just be indicative of the fact that he was black and the boy knew his father had to have been. Theo didn’t know.
Why had she left earlier this morning without talking to him? Why did the tattoo matter? Why was she telling him in front of Logan? He guessed because she had no choice.
Would she have ever told him otherwise?
Ever?
Theo wanted to demand explanations, but didn’t know where to start. He also knew that Lyssa’s choice wasn’t Logan’s fault. There were a lot of things he shouldn’t say in front of his son, things that should remain between himself and Lyssa.
The main thing that mattered right this minute was that he had a son and he had a lot of time with that son to make up. He took a deep breath and pushed his anger away. He was simmering, but it would have to wait.
“If you’d known, would you have wanted to be my dad?” Logan asked, his expression wary.
“Yes,” Theo said. “Absolutely.” Lyssa might have her own expectations, but he had to be himself with his own son. “I had no idea. I knew that your mom had become a model and that she was successful, but we already talked about you not being in the media at all.” Logan nodded. “And your mom and I haven’t talked since before you were born. It was almost exactly eleven years ago.”
Logan looked up at Lyssa. “Why didn’t you tell him?”
“I should have,” Lyssa admitted. “But I was afraid, and then there was Justin, and then everything got really complicated.” She looked a bit lost.
Theo knew he shouldn’t forgive her anytime soon.
“I thought it was never too complicated to tell the truth,” Logan said, a challenge in his tone, and Theo nodded agreement.
“It shouldn’t be. I was wrong.”
Logan glared at Lyssa. “I had a dad and I didn’t know it. That sucks, Mom.”
“It does,” Lyssa agreed. “I’m sorry.”
“You lied to him and to me,” Logan said, looking as if he was fighting tears. “Saying sorry doesn’t fix it.”
“No, but I don’t have a lot of other options, do I?”
Theo saw the boy’s uncertainty mingle with his resentment and wanted to ease the tension. He just didn’t know how.
There was no doubt that Logan was his son. The boy had the most amazing hazel eyes. Gold and green and brown, too. Freckles, like Theo, but more of them, like Naomi. Theo could see his own mother in the shape of his eyes and Lyssa in the outline of his mouth and heard his dad in Logan’s indignation with Lyssa—and yet, Logan was his own self, too.
Ten years.
Logan had confidence, too, enough to call Lyssa on what he saw as a shortfall. Theo thought about Logan’s statement that he wasn’t ever photographed and realized how effective and protective Lyssa had been. He’d never seen one mention that she had a child, much less a picture of Logan.
She’d defended him—which meant Kyle was right about her influence with the media.
“I’m sorry that I messed this up, Logan. But you told me your wish at Thanksgiving.”
“That I wanted a dad.”
Theo was surprised by that, but Lyssa nodded. “I think the dad you should have is the man who is really your father.” That made sense to Theo.
“So, you came to New York,” he said.
Lyssa nodded. “I wanted to find you and talk to you first, then introduce you both.” She shook her head. “But things didn’t quite go according to plan.”
Theo felt that he had a very good understanding of Lyssa’s priorities with that confession.
The future started right now.
Theo leaned across the table. “If I had known about you, Logan, I would have been there for every single minute, whether your mom was talking to me or not. I wouldn’t have wanted to miss a thing.”
“Really?” He could see Logan’s doubt warring with his desire to believe. He was an open book, maybe because of his age, maybe because he took after that younger Lyssa.
“Really.” Theo pulled out one of his business cards from F5, circled his cell phone number then handed it to Logan. “We can’t turn back the clock, but we can start fresh right here and right now. You can call me anytime, Logan. It doesn’t matter why. It doesn’t matter when. If you need to, you can reverse the charges. I’ll always pick up or call you back if I’m on the line and you leave a message. I promise you, I’m here for you, from this day forward. It might not seem like enough, but it’s a place to begin.”
Logan eyed the card, turned it over then looked at Theo. “Publicity director. What does that mean?”
“It means I invite famous people to visit the club, to come to the parties, or even to join as members.”
“Why?”
“So that people talk about the club, and the media that photograph celebrities have pictures of the club, and that celebrities talk about the club, too. That makes everyone aware that F5 is cool and it makes a lot of people want to join up.”
“It provides traffic to your social media sites.”
Theo blinked then realized that Logan would understand his mom’s business. “Yes.”
“Like the pop-ups and the competition.”
“Yeah, well, that’s more marketing than I usually do. It’s been fun, though.”
“So, you’re usually like Mercedes.”
“No, people like Mercedes work for me. That’s what director means.”
Logan nodded and fingered the card. “You should give my mom a membership to Flatiron Five.”
The idea didn’t resonate with Theo. “I could do that, if she was going to come and work out regularly, and didn’t mind being seen and photographed doing so.” Theo wasn’t certain what Lyssa had in mind for the future. He halfway thought that she’d just popped back into his life to jerk him around, or maybe to see how strong her influence over him still was, and that she’d disappear again at any moment.
Would she let him have a relationship with Logan?
He had to ensure that she did.
“Or she could buy a membership and just be like all the other members. Of course, with your mom’s travel obligations, it might not make sense to join the club. We only have locations in the States and I know your mom spends a lot of time in Europe.”
“Not any more,” Logan said, then looked at Lyssa. “You let me tell Franco and Giancarlo,” he said, whoever they might be. There was a challenge in his tone that Theo didn’t understand either.
Lyssa’s smile was tight. “You can tell Theo. It won’t be a secret much longer and it’s something he deserves to know.”
Logan leaned across the table again, his eyes shining. “We’re going to buy an apartment right here in New York, and I get to have my very own room!”
Once again, Theo had the sense that Lyssa was pulling the rug from beneath his feet. There had been a time when he’d looked forward to her surprises but these were too big to come in rapid succession. “Are you?” he managed to say.
“Because Mom’s quitting.”
“I’m not quitting, Logan. I’m retiring.”
“Same thing. We’ve been looking at apartments to make sure we choose the right one. We’re going to be like normal people.” Logan said this with such satisfaction that Theo wondered what his life had been like.
He also had a hard time believing Lyssa would quit. She seemed to be at the height of success. He remembered her comment about getting older, though.
Surely, she wasn’t going to disappoint Logan?
Lyssa gave the boy a little hug. “I’m not sure I aspire to be entirely normal.”
Logan rolled his eyes.
Theo met her gaze. “You’re retiring to New York.”
“To New York,” she agreed. “It’s time to move on to new challenges.” She smiled at Logan and Theo saw affection between them. Theo had the impression that she’d done well with Logan.
Or maybe she’d hired people who had done well with Logan.
After all, the boy probably had
only Lyssa to rely on and she had to have a frantic travel schedule.
She smiled, uncertainty lingering in her eyes when she met his gaze. “And I want to put some things right, if you’re agreeable to that.”
“How could I not be?” He sounded irritable and he knew it, but he felt cornered. What else could he have said?
There was certainly a lot he wanted to say, but it wasn’t for Logan to hear.
Lyssa cleared her throat. “Maybe I need some help with this normal life thing from someone who’s more organized. Maybe we need to be friends.” She raised her brows, holding Theo’s gaze, and mouthed the next words. “For Logan.”
For Logan.
Theo had known of his son’s existence for less than five minutes and he already would do anything for him.
She’d made the one appeal he couldn’t resist.
He nodded.
Lyssa cleared her throat and he saw her blink rapidly. “I’d like to talk with you about all of this, maybe after you’ve had time to come to terms with it. Logan goes back to his school Friday, but then I’ll have lots of time.”
“His school?”
“He attends a private school. It’s better for him to have a stable environment when I travel.” She named the school and Theo was impressed. It had an excellent reputation.
He guessed it wasn’t cheap.
“Do you like it?” he asked Logan.
The boy nodded. “But it’s not Hogwarts, you know.”
“Did you think it would be?”
“I hoped.” They shared a smile and Theo realized he was already thinking of cool places he could take Logan.
“Call me then,” Theo invited, watching Lyssa nod agreement. He dared to hope for the future, then he wondered if he was a fool to have any expectations of the woman who had kept such a secret from him.
“What about the pictures?” he asked, almost having forgotten the whole reason he’d sought her out.
“I’ll fix it,” she said with resolve.
“If you’re retiring, what do you have to negotiate with?” Theo had to ask.
Lyssa forced a smile. “I’ll think of something.” Her gaze clung to his. “I know I have to fix this, Theo, and I will, whatever the price.”
That sounded ominous but Theo told himself to stay out of it. “I’ve got to get to today’s pop-up.” He had to travel all the way downtown, to the ferry to the Statue of Liberty.
Bad Case of Loving You Page 17