His demeanor went from warm and caring to ice cold in a heartbeat. His hands became hard once more. “That will never happen, Natasha.”
Tears of helpless anger filled her eyes. “I don’t want this!” she yelled up at him.
He studied her, his eyes coveting her in a way she knew, but did not quite understand. She could see it in the eyes of others as they watched the dancers. She knew why David wanted her, why powerful men haggled over the dancers, paid large sums of money to own their bodies. But this was not something she had experienced. It frightened her. She began to wish she were a little less innocent. Then maybe she could better deal with a man like David. Though she suspected dealing with a man on David’s level, no matter her experience, would be impossible.
His grip on her tightened. “Perhaps I should make sure you do want this.”
Her sapphire eyes flared and she shook her head as his descended. Her gaze fixed on the sinister scar next to his lip as he covered hers in a gentle kiss. She was so surprised by the light, evocative pressure, expecting him to crush her resistance with brutality, that she gasped. Perhaps that was the opening he was looking for, because the moment her lips parted, he deepened the kiss, giving her no time to protest the invasion, shifting her in his arms so her head rested against the back of his arm until she had nowhere to go, nowhere to turn to escape him.
He took from her lips, possessing them for the very first time. His lips caressed hers, pressing, pushing and loving in a way she’d never imagined possible when she’d lain awake in her dorm imagining what kissing was like. She didn’t know it could be anything like this. It was so warm and exciting. Tingles coursed through her body, from her lips outward. They also sparked in her nipples and in other places. He touched his lips to the corner of her mouth drawing a moan from her, then he darted his tongue against her. She gasped and once more he took advantage, pushing his tongue through the barrier of her lips.
She moaned again and arched her neck, flexing her fingers in the fabric of his jacket. She didn’t know what to do with her own tongue, but it didn’t seem to matter to him, he just took and took, sweeping her mouth with his tongue until she felt weak and shaky. He darted inside and then backed off until she felt herself leaning eagerly forward, kissing him back. When she realized what she was doing a hot blush stole over her flesh and she immediately released her grip on his jacket. She stilled against him and opened her eyes.
As if sensing her withdrawal David backed off, giving her room to recover from his passionate advance. He kissed the edge of her mouth once more and straightened, pulling her up against him and holding her in a loose embrace. The breath rushed in and out of her lungs as her numbed brain tried to function.
She stood in the curve of his arms, blinking uncertainly. Trying not to look as foolish and young as she suddenly felt. Her first kiss. She ached all over her body. Like fire, but not painful. She glanced up at him through her lashes, wondering if he would be amused by her simple reaction. Shocked at what she read on his face, she nearly stepped away from him. He must have sensed her intention because his arms tightened around her, stopping her. He was not amused. His black eyes were burning with a similar fire to the one that smouldered low in her belly. Except worse. Much worse. He looked like was going to combust at any moment and burn them both alive. It was terrifying to be looked at in such a way by such a man.
“I need to get you back to your dorm, Natasha,” he said huskily, his voice sounding a little unsteady for the first time since she met him.
“But we haven’t eaten,” she said softly.
He grunted and took her elbow. “Come. We will eat along the way. We cannot stay here or you will not be a virgin on your wedding day and though I am not a traditional man, I know you were raised to believe in such things.” Tasha gasped at his blunt declaration and rushed to keep up with his long strides.
Later that night as she stared sleeplessly through the window of her dorm room, it occurred to her that David was correct about two things. She had been raised traditionally and David had made sure she wanted him. Physically, anyway. In the darkness of her shared room she pressed her fingers lightly against her lips, still feeling the tingles of him there. She knew she should be angry at the potential loss of her career. She should be frightened at his declaration that she would become his wife. Yet, the only thing Tasha could think about was the kiss they shared and what more they could share if they were married.
Chapter Four
Tasha didn’t know how it was possible, but sometime over the following month, she went from despising the man determined to ruin her entire career, to not quite hating him as much, to liking him a little, to falling head over heels in love with the shadowy, enigmatic man.
It may have had something to do with the endless gifts he sent her, or the shopping trips he insisted on taking her on. The expensive restaurants he took her to, or the romantic rendezvous he planned for her. Perhaps it was the way he treated her as though she was the only woman that existed in his universe, an act that was certainly hard to resist. Although, if Tasha were going to be completely honest, she would have to admit, the moment she fell completely for her mysterious David was the first time he made love to her, about two hours after they spoke their wedding vows.
It wasn’t the sex itself, though that part was quite wonderful in her opinion. It was the way, for the first time, David had been, not quite in control of himself. It showed her, that maybe, just maybe, even though he never said the actual words, perhaps he loved her just a little.
He had walked her straight out of the tiny church with just one witness to their vows, past the priest who seemed to know and fear David and hustled her into his car without his usual finesse. He had closed the door just a little too hard and then driven just a little too fast, which had made Tasha nervous. Not that she thought he would crash. She just wasn’t used to this new aspect of David. He was always intense… but this was something else. So, she tried conversation.
“Umm… so your real name is Alexandr D-” His head whipped to the side, his eyes blazing with some kind of wrath. Not for her necessarily, though she certainly wasn’t willing to finish her sentence.
“It is not,” he snapped, his voice deep and hard in the small space of the car. Tasha shrank a little against the passenger door and tangled her fingers around the white lilies he’d given her to carry in the church. “I use that name for official purposes. You may continue to call me David.”
She worried her bottom lip for a moment, too frightened at first to speak. But she had to know before they arrived at his house. Before they lived as man and wife. Though she did not practice her religion often, she was raised a devout girl. “A-are we actually married then?” she whispered, her eyes glued to the flowers that she was slowly shredding. “I mean if you didn’t give your real name at the church.”
She flinched when he reached for her, but he only took her hand and pulled it away from the flower before she could do more damage. He brought her fingers to his lips and kissed them, his lips lingering against the engagement ring and the delicate gold band that he had placed on her finger twenty minutes earlier. Warmth flooded through her cold digits with that small caress. She hadn’t realized she was even cold until that moment. It always surprised her how cool David could act, yet how warm his caresses were. He’d spent the past month gradually getting her more and more used to his touch. Though he didn’t subject her to more passionate embraces like the second night of their acquaintance, he did often touch her. He would place a hand on her back or neck when they were out together or take her hand or arm.
“Our wedding was official,” he told her quietly, placing her hand on his leg without releasing her. “The name on our certificate is the name on my legal documents. It is not, however, the name I wish for my wife to use. It gives me no pleasure to hear it upon your lips, Natasha.”
She turned her head to watch him. She didn’t usually get to see him during the day, in the sunlight. He looked handsomer
somehow, less frightening, though his scars were more visible in the light. Over the past month, when they had been dating, he picked her up after dark, after rehearsal or after she finished her part in the chorus, which often finished earlier than her parts as principal had. Though she missed the accolades and fierce competition of principal dancing, she had to admit, there was far more fun to be had in the chorus. The girls were easier going and chattier. Less competitive overall.
Her heart began fluttering in terrified anticipation when he turned the car onto the street that belonged to his house. She tore her eyes away from his face and glanced shyly out the window. He released her hand to open his door. She waited for him to come around to her side. He always insisted on letting her out of the car. She had been brave enough once to question him on the out-dated chivalry and he had said it was to keep her safe. He wanted to be able to shield her with his body should anyone attack them. She’d laughed as though it were a joke, but she knew, somehow, he wasn’t joking at all. David didn’t make jokes.
He ushered her inside, going about his usual security routine, but she could feel the dark edge of impatience shrouding his movements. He didn’t pause to give her time to adjust. He didn’t take her coat or invite her to look around her new home. She’d only been there the one time when he vowed not to touch her too intimately again until her wedding night. Until now. She nervously took in the suitcase and two boxes he had picked up and dropped off earlier while the dorm matron and a few of the girls were helping her prepare for the wedding.
He took her arm and pulled her down a long, dark hall. She tried to keep up with his longer strides but stumbled and nearly went down on the smooth concrete floor. Her hand flew out toward the bare wall, barely grazing the surface before he caught her. He turned swiftly and grabbed her, swinging her into his body. The flowers slipped from her fingers, scattering across the floor between them. Neither of them looked down.
Tasha was amazed at how quick he had reacted to her near fall. She slid her hand against expensive fabric of his suit jacket and blinked up at him, her lips quivering a little. She tried to force words out, past her frozen tongue, but nothing happened. She wanted to ask for a reprieve, for a moment to catch her breath and step off the crazy ride he’d taken her on, but she knew he wouldn’t allow it. His black eyes didn’t hold mercy. They never did. Not for her. Not for anyone. So, she relaxed her shoulders and rested her head against his chest, burrowing against the warmth she knew would be there as he swung her up against him and carried her the rest of the way down the hall and into his bedroom. Their bedroom.
Once inside, he closed the door, shutting out the eerie stillness of his cold, empty home and set her on her feet. Her heeled shoes clattered against the concrete. She wondered why he had bare, concrete flooring in his home instead of wood or carpet. Just as she wondered why there were no pictures on the walls or any small touches that declared a human lived there. Her eyes darted to the bed and widened in dismay.
She didn’t want to be a stupid, timid little virgin. She’d had dozens of pep talks with herself over the past weeks, especially in the darkness of her bed after David had dropped her off and kissed her goodnight. Though he never let those caresses get out of hand again, they were still heated, heart-stuttering, butterflies-in-tummy inducing kisses. Tasha had lain in the same bed she’d slept in for six years and slipped her hand between her thighs and marvelled at the dripping wetness he had induced. She had enjoyed the feel of her fingers sliding over her own flesh. Had closed her eyes and pictured his larger, harder hand replacing hers, taking charge of her pleasure. She knew, deep down, he could and he would. He said he could make her like it and she believed him.
But now, looking at that large, intimidating bed, with a stark, utilitarian grey blanket and only a few pillows, she was frightened. The other girls had told her that their first time with sex and the few times after were not very good. But it got better, eventually. One of the chorus dancers, Zoya, had a boyfriend, even though she wasn’t supposed to. She said her first time wasn’t too bad because her boyfriend cared enough to make it special. But her situation was different. She wasn’t like the rest of the girls, taken for their bodies by men that didn’t care about their pleasure.
Tasha shivered and stepped away from the bed, her back crashing into David’s chest. She whirled around to face him, automatically bringing her hands up in defense. She tried to step back again but he grasped her shoulders before she could, holding her still. The stern look he gave her told her without words that she needed to stand still. Slowly he slid his fingers from her shoulders across to her neck and unbuttoned the jacket that covered her wedding dress. His hand slipped to the zipper and gently slid it down the front of her body, very lightly caressing the tip of her breast with his knuckle. When he finished, he pushed the fabric over her shoulders and let it fall to the floor behind her. She felt the swish of satin against her legs as the heavy fabric pooled against her dress at her ankles.
She felt trapped. She couldn’t step back, nor could she step forward. She looked helplessly up at the man that was now in her path. He took her hand, holding her in place as he stepped away to look at her. Not as he’d done in the church, where he’d impatiently recited his vows in his quiet, guttural voice, as though willing the ceremony over with so he could steal his bride away. But he really looked at her. In a way that both soothed and terrified her. He very much made her feel like the only woman in the entire world, like she was the only one for him. Forever. It was enough to make any girl’s romantic heart beat into overdrive.
But… he also looked at her with those black, possessive eyes as though he was pinning her in place and holding her still. For a time. Like one of those snow globes in the gift store with the beautiful ballerina. She would be locked inside the cold glass cage then picked up and shaken. All the snow would go up and around in a blizzard, but she would still be trapped inside in a frozen dance with him watching all the time. Only him, because no one else is ever allowed to watch now that she has become his wife. She would dance and dance until the snow finally finished falling down at her feet and then… bang. No more dancing.
She could feel it in her heart. Though she was falling in love with her new husband, something wasn’t right. His eyes were hard and his house was empty. Her hope was in the jealous possession she saw in his eyes, in that he chose her over being alone. Her only hope was that she could perhaps make this cold, hard man love her back. Just a little. Before the snow stopped falling.
“Krasivaya, Natasha. You take my breath away,” he said to her, halting her bleak musing.
She blinked at him and smiled. She had hoped he would find her beautiful on her wedding day. Matron Tonya has braided her thick mahogany hair back in an intricate knot and wove one of the white lilies in at the back. Her actual dress was made of cream coloured satin with a lace overlay that fell to her feet. It was pretty and a little old-fashioned with cap sleeves and a sweetheart neckline, but she loved it. Tasha had missed her family on her wedding day and had written to tell them of the event a few weeks prior. They were pleased that she had found a wealthy man and that she seemed happy.
David began to unbutton the front of his suit. Her eyes flickered to his fingers as he slowly drew the buttons one at a time through the fine fabric. She couldn’t tell if this suit was new or not. If he had bothered to pick up a new, better one for his wedding day. David always wore black suits with black or grey collared shirts underneath. Sometimes he wore a tie when they went out for a fancy dinner. Today he was wearing a tie.
The wide gold band on his finger flashed as he pulled the suit jacket off his broad shoulders. She watched his hands a lot when she was with him. At first it had been because she hadn’t wanted to see his face. To see the face of the man who was stealing her from her destiny and taking her for himself. Then she’d started watching his hands because she’d found them calming. She had begun to realize just how deliberate David was in all of his movements, beginning with his hands.
The slow, measured movements David made with his hands never failed to soothe Tasha when she was feeling anxious, which she found happening less and less the more he took her from theatre life.
He reached past her to place his suit jacket on the back of a chair next to a wall. She kept her eyes on his hands, watching the way the cuffs moved revealing the veins under his skin as he stretched. Her heart quickened as she thought of the way he slid those hands across the smoothness of her cheek or neck when he leaned in to kiss her goodnight after dropping her off. He was always so gentle with her even though she could feel the tension boiling beneath the surface. She knew there was so much more to this man.
“Look at me, Natasha,” he demanded, stepping closer to her.
Startled, her eyes flew up to meet his. Sky blue met relentless black. He held her worried gaze with one that refused to relieve her anxiety. He was not the kind of man that would back down from his course of action once he was set upon it. She wondered what kind of marriage they would have? Would she be expected to keep his house while he did… what exactly? She knew very little about her new husband.
“Tell me what you are thinking, Natasha,” he asked, his voice demanding obedience. “I do not like what is in your eyes right now.” She twisted her hands together and tried to turn away, but he caught her arm. “No, stay and talk to me. Something is giving you anxiety.”
A spark of annoyance flashed through her and she rolled her eyes a little, but blinked so he wouldn’t see it. She sighed instead and shrugged. “Of course, I’m anxious David,” she said softly. “I’ve been taken from the only home I have known for over six years and married in a church away from my family and friends to a man I barely know. A man who is fourteen years older than me. A man who I know almost nothing about. Aren’t these things enough for me to be anxious over?”
The Assassin's Wife Page 3