“Speaking of jumping, I’ve been working on those exercises you gave me.”
“And?”
They headed back toward Sam’s trailer. “He’s not looking at anything I put on the ground now.”
“Good. That’s the first step, teaching him that things in front of him aren’t scary.”
“What about you?” Sam asked. “Have you been doing the exercises I gave you?”
Sam was something of a fitness nut. She’d texted Natalie a long list of exercises to do every morning. “I have.” And she’d started her hippotherapy lessons, too, and between it all, she actually felt she might be improving.
“Are they helping?”
“Actually, I think they are.”
“Good.” Sam swung open the back of the trailer. “My only concern is that Roger trips a lot over the poles.”
“That’s okay. Just as long as he’s not spooking or refusing. We can help him learn to be less clumsy.”
“Oh, good, because I really want to teach this guy a new trick.” She went to Roger’s head, patted his neck. The small bay gelding turned as far as the trailer tie would let him. He was in the first stall, and Sam expertly unclipped and then turned the animal around. “Jumping through a flaming hoop has always been a dream of mine.”
“Isn’t that everybody’s dream?” Natalie teased.
Sam met her gaze and laughed, and Natalie realized she liked this version of Sam. She was friendly and clearly willing to help.
“Probably not everyone’s, but it’s been one of mine.”
“And I can help with that. I have poles here. Even a few jump standards if we decide to take him over some fences.”
Roger stepped out of the trailer like a perfect gentleman. “You think?”
“Sure, why not? It’ll be easier to work with him here than at Colt’s place.”
She spotted the way Sam’s smile slipped a notch. They’d talked briefly on the phone about Colt and his nephew.
“Have you talked to him since the doctor appointment?” Natalie asked.
The smile fell completely away from Sam’s face. “Yeah. Not good. They’re sending Adam down to the children’s hospital to see some kind of specialist.”
As someone who’d spent more time than she cared to admit with specialists, Natalie didn’t envy Colt or his sister, but most of all she didn’t envy poor little Adam. One test after another. Needles. Scans. Conferences with doctors. And at the end of it all, more often than not, uncertainty. Or worse.
You’ll never ride a horse again.
The words still had the ability to suck the wind from her chest.
Sam paused with Roger standing patiently by her side. “That poor man has been through so much already. The whole family has, and now this.” She shook her head. “It just doesn’t seem fair.”
It took a moment for Natalie to follow Sam’s train of thought. “I heard Colt’s dad was sick for a while.”
Sam’s eyes scanned her own and Natalie could tell that wasn’t what she’d meant at all. She glanced toward the makeshift arena, the change in angle setting off the blue of her eyes, before clucking at Roger and heading toward the riding pen.
“I’ve known Colt my entire life,” Sam said.
Had she? Colt hadn’t mentioned it, not that he should have, but Natalie had just sort of figured they’d met through the rodeo circuit.
“Did you grow up in Via Del Caballo?”
“Yup.” Sam pointed south. “Right down the road. My mom and dad breed cattle. Where’d you grow up?”
“Down south, in the desert, the product of middle class parents who could barely afford my horse habit.”
“And yet you still found fame and glory. They must be proud.”
Natalie hesitated. “They were always very supportive, despite not understanding my obsession.”
Sharp-eared Sam didn’t miss a thing. “Were?”
“My dad took up flying once I was out of the house.” Natalie took a deep breath. “One day they decided to head toward Lake Tahoe.” She shrugged because, really, what else was there to say?
They had come to a stop outside the gate, Sam’s gaze capturing her own, the depth of compassion in them as deep as the ocean. “I’m so sorry.”
And with those three words Natalie decided she and Sam would be great friends. “It’s okay. I’m mostly over it.”
“No.” Sam’s dark hair fell over one shoulder when she gave a shake of her head. “You never get over something like that.”
No, you didn’t, and it almost sounded as though Sam knew from experience, although Natalie didn’t want to pry.
“So, anyway, enough about me. You ready to work?”
“In a second.” Sam’s eyes grew, if possible, even more serious. “I wanted to talk to you about Colt.”
Uh oh.
Sam fiddled with the end of the lead rope. “The next few months, hell, maybe even years won’t be easy on him.”
“No. I suspect not.”
“And Colt’s not the kind of guy that will reach out for help.”
“No?”
Sam shook her head. “It’s not in his programming. His childhood left some scars that run pretty deep, scars that keep him from asking for anything.” Sam shot her a knowing look that made Natalie wonder just how bad it could be. “Suffice it to say I’m worried about him. With all his upcoming commitments, plus his sick nephew, he might just run himself into the ground like he did before.”
Natalie realized then what Sam was getting at. “You want me to tell him I don’t want his help anymore.”
“Not right away.” Sam reached out and rested a hand on her arm. “I know how important this is to you, but if you’ll let me, I’ll help you instead. I’m not as good at training horses as Colt is, but I’m not bad, either. We can help each other.”
Was this some sort of competition thing? Natalie wondered. A way to keep her away from Colt? Was that what this was all about?
But as she studied Sam’s eyes, she doubted it. What she saw in the woman’s face was deep-rooted concern.
“What happened before?”
Clearly, Sam didn’t feel comfortable sharing certain aspects of Colt’s past. Just as clearly, she wanted Natalie to understand.
“Back when Colt’s dad was sick, it got pretty bad.”
Natalie waited for Sam to gather her thoughts, perhaps to decide how much to reveal and how much to keep to herself.
“You know Colt was in the military, right?”
Natalie nodded. She’d heard that, but little else about his background, other than the fact he’d grown up on Reynolds’s Ranch and had taken over the rodeo business once he’d been discharged.
“But you probably don’t know that everyone hated his father. My mom said Hank Reynolds could charm a snake from the ground, but he was as rotten as a rattler. She’s convinced he killed Abigail, Colt’s mom, and covered it up.”
“That’s horrible.”
Once again Sam shot her an appraising look. “You don’t know the half of it.” The breath she took seemed to clear her mind. “One time when we were thirteen, Colt refused to take his shirt off to go swimming. He told me he was afraid of getting sunburned, but I saw the bruises on his arms. I even asked him about it. He said he’d fallen off a horse, but we all knew better. My mom said Abigail used to come into town so bruised up it looked like she’d fallen out of the back of a truck.”
The strange thing was, Natalie didn’t feel the least bit surprised. Somehow she’d known there was something off with Colt. Not something wrong, just something that made him view the world differently than others did. She’d assumed it had to do with his time in the military, but now she knew better.
“The man’s a saint, though. When his dad had his stroke, Colt came back home to nurse him—not that his dad appreciated it. Gosh, he was terrible. Made Colt’s life hell. At the same time Colt’s sister was nursing her husband so he was helping her out watching Adam and taking care of the dogs.”
“Yeah.” Sam seemed surprised. “Colt’s sister owns a kennel.” Her nose twitched. “Not a kennel-kennel. She specializes in military dogs. Rehomes them and stuff.”
“I had no idea.”
“Yeah. She lives less than a mile from Colt and so he was always running between the two places, and, for the first few months, filling in for his dad on the rodeo circuit. It would have been hard on a normal person, but Colt’s the type to keep going until he drops. He got sick. Wouldn’t rest. We all told him to take a break, but he never listened. His sister found him passed out in the kitchen one day.”
“Passed out? What happened?”
“Stupid man had pneumonia. For a while there it was pretty scary.”
He’d worked until he dropped. Literally. Why wasn’t she surprised?
“Anyway, my point is he’s got a lot on his plate.”
“And you don’t want to see him dragged down again.” When she looked into the woman’s eyes she could see the relief that Natalie understood.
She thought back to when she’d been in the hospital, to how difficult it’d been on her friends. She didn’t have any family, but thanks to Jillian and Mariah she’d made it through. They’d been a tag team, though, and neither of them had had a sick relative at the time.
“I’ll talk to him tomorrow.”
Sam’s smile was so genuine it eliminated any thoughts of competition. “Thank you.”
Before Natalie could say another word she was wrapped in a hug. She forced a smile because no matter what she might tell Sam, she was disappointed she wouldn’t be working with Colt anymore, and oddly enough, not just because of his expert horsemanship. No. She liked Colt, liked him in a way that took her by surprise given how distant he’d been at first.
“You’ll see.” Sam drew back. “You’ve made the right choice.”
Then why did it feel so wrong?
Chapter Eight
Some days you’re the windshield, other days the bug.
Today Colt felt like a bug. His sister had left at the crack of dawn to take Adam to see a specialist. He’d offered to go along, but Claire had insisted he stay behind. Somebody had to take care of the ranch, she’d said: feed the livestock, check on the dogs, turn out the horses. He had to prepare for the rodeo coming up this weekend, too, and Natalie was coming over for another training session.
Natalie.
He couldn’t seem to get the dang woman off his mind. He kept flashing back to the image of her sitting atop Playboy, laughing. Truth be told, it was the memory of that smile that had helped him get through the past few days. Right now the last thing he probably needed was another horse to ride, but helping Natalie didn’t seem like work. It seemed like something he should do, though God knew why.
She pulled up right on schedule, although a quick glance at the sky told him they might have to cut their ride short. Looked like rain. She’d dressed for it in a burgundy jacket that matched the blush of her cheeks. He liked that she was always on time. Punctual to a T, but as she exited her old rattletrap of a truck, her serious expression took him by surprise. To his complete and utter shock he admitted to himself he’d been looking forward to her smile. What a crazy, ridiculous, stupid thing.
“What’s wrong?” he called.
He saw her brow lift, her pretty blue eyes flash with surprise. “What do you mean?”
“You look like you’re about to visit a sick relative in hospital.”
“Well, in a way, I am.” She walked up to him and Colt wouldn’t have been a man if he didn’t notice how good she looked. Those eyes of hers were the same color as a bluebird’s wings—a bright, vivid hue that seemed to shimmer in the light.
“How’s your nephew?” she asked.
Colt had been dealing with his sister all week, trying for Adam’s sake to act as if nothing had changed. He shrugged as he turned and began walking with Natalie toward the barn. The wind kicked up again, catching the underside of his black cowboy hat and trying to blow it off his head.
“He’s too young to understand what’s going on, but I guess that’s a blessing.”
Her eyes lost some of their luster. “Poor thing. He’ll understand soon enough.”
Colt’s stomach seemed to drop to his toes as he thought of the future. “Right now all he can talk about is Hawkman, his favorite movie of all time, but it’s just a matter of days before he figures it out. They’re starting chemo next week.”
She tipped her head to the side, her short blond bangs falling across her forehead. “And the thought kills you.”
Was it that obvious? “I’m just hoping it won’t be as bad as it sounds.” He took a deep breath. “You ready to get to work?”
She paused just outside the barn. “Actually, I’d like to talk to you about that.” She fiddled with the edge of the black shirt she wore beneath her open jacket, one with rhinestones in the shape of a cross. “Colt, you have a lot going on.”
“Yeah.”
“Sam and I were talking the other day and we both think maybe I should take Playboy home, you know, just until things settle down. I know you’ve been asked to watch your sister’s place while they deal with hospital visits and that you have some rodeo obligations you can’t get out of. The last thing you need is another commitment.”
That sounded like Sam talking. His well-meaning neighbor could be a pain in the rear. He didn’t mind her and the girls coming over and using his arena, especially since they were now a part of his act, but Sam had been after him for years to settle down, and she made no secret of the fact that she’d like to settle down with him. He’d always discouraged her because even if he were the type to dive into a relationship, which he wasn’t, it wouldn’t be with Sam. It would be with someone like...
Nope.
Wasn’t going to go there. Not now. Yet even though he counseled himself to do otherwise, he couldn’t take his eyes off Natalie. She was like a talisman for good, a comic-book hero who’d been through hell—and had emerged with a smile. She was the epitome of brave, and damned if he didn’t admire her.
“Admit it, Colt,” she added. “You don’t need to be dealing with me.”
“What I need is to be allowed to make my own decisions.”
Her eyes widened just the tiniest bit, enough for him to realize the words had come out harshly. He pushed his hat back a bit, trying to get his emotions under control. This was exactly why he avoided relationships. He was no good at them. No good at holding on to his temper.
Like father, like son.
“Look. Sorry. I know you’re just trying to be nice, but what I need right now is to keep doing what I’m doing, and that means working with Playboy. Riding is my therapy and Playboy’s such a responsive horse he’s a joy to ride. You picked a good one.”
Though the cloud cover afforded less light than usual, he could see the way her eyes lit up. “You think?”
“He learns really quickly. I’m riding him on a drape now.”
“A drape?”
He smiled. “That’s Western talk for riding with no contact. You drape the reins. Once I get him good and broke like that I’ll try him without the reins.”
“You still think I should do this then? You think I’m capable?”
It was funny. Three weeks ago the last thing he’d wanted was to help her. Now he felt like grasping on to his little project with both hands, especially when she stared up at him so endearingly. He’d never met someone with such grit and drive. The other day she’d been terrified, but she’d done what he’d asked. She’d put herself completely in his hands and he couldn’t deny he liked the feeling.
“I have no doubt in my mind.”
He hadn’t realized how tense she’d been until he saw her shoulders drop. “Okay then.” She lifted her head, her sparkling eyes filled with determination. “But you have to let me help you, too.”
“Excuse me?”
She nodded firmly. “I want
to lend a hand around here. Whatever you need. Feeding the horses. Dogs. Cats. Doing your sister’s laundry. Whatever.”
The proposition took him by surprise. Sure, they’d had offers from others, but that was different. They were all good friends. He didn’t know Natalie all that well.
“You don’t have to do that.”
“Yes, I do. In fact, I insist.”
“We have plenty of help already.”
She took a step toward him and it made Colt want to retreat. It wasn’t that she stood too close, it was more that whenever she came near he had to fight the crazy urge to close the distance and...touch her.
Not good.
“I know what it’s like not to have much family to count on.” She looked away for a moment and in her expression he saw memories flicker. There for all the world to see, he caught glimpses of sadness, longing and pain. When she’d gotten herself together she lifted her chin. “Times like these, you need to lean on whoever you can.” Her fingers captured his and for a moment Colt couldn’t think. “I hope you count me as a friend.”
It took every ounce of his intellect to muster the words, “I do.”
She smiled. That beautiful, sparkling grin that could lift the spirits of a man on the verge of a lethal injection.
“Good. Then no arguing.” She squeezed his hand. “I understand your sister runs a kennel, and I just happen to be really good with dogs. We’ll go over there after we’re done with Playboy.”
She turned toward the barn as if the conversation was over, and he supposed in a way it was. He knew resolve when he saw it, and Natalie had it written all over her face. It was then, right then as she walked away, that he decided she was unlike any other woman he’d met. A woman who had her own burdens to bear, but who still wanted to help a near stranger. A woman of courage and kindness who made him, just for the tiniest moment, wonder what it would have been like if he hadn’t been raised by a bastard with no heart. A man who’d destroyed his belief in love. A man who had taught him one golden truth: the fewer people you had in your life, the fewer people who could hurt you.
Chapter Nine
He’d made huge progress with Playboy. Natalie marveled as she watched Colt work with her gelding. The gathering clouds and cooler temperatures would make most horses fresh, and yet Playboy acted like a seasoned veteran. It was windy, too, sharp gusts threatening to remove Colt’s Stetson from his head. That, too, made horses difficult to deal with. Usually. Playboy hardly seemed to notice the way his black mane tangled in the breeze or how his tail wrapped around his back legs every once in awhile.
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