How he could manage to intimidate stretched out on his blanket, his braced elbow supporting his weight, she did not know. But the length and strength of him made her knees quiver. He appealed all too often to her senses and at this moment her sense of sight was much too heightened as her eyes reveled in every defined curve, bump and bulge of him.
She wisely averted her eyes to Lady, giving her head a thoughtful pat.
“She cannot see to it on her own?” Colin asked.
Lady answered with a woeful whimper.
Colin laughed softly and with a stretch and a gentle ease of his body, he stood. “I will go with you.”
Hope knew better than to protest. She simply shrugged as if his decision made no difference to her and walked toward the night shadows.
Lady took her time, as she always did. She typically sniffed and pawed the ground until she found the perfect spot, and just when Hope thought her ready she would stop and start the process all over again.
Hope thought to take advantage of her dog’s intentional lingering to learn more about Colin.
She decided to be blunt; it often caught people off guard and made for an honest response.
“Do you not wish to love?”
Colin was too much of a seasoned warrior to respond without regard, though he did stop in his tracks, the unexpected reaction annoying him.
“And why is one so young thinking about love?”
Her answer came easily, for it was the truth. “I learned about love from my mother and father and realized how important it is. I could not imagine a relationship without such a binding love. So I but wonder if you ever think of loving, truly loving someone.”
Colin envied the lad his loving parents. His childhood had been emotionally and physically barren and he had found himself all too often aching for loving arms. And did he still not wish for those loving arms?
His answer was yet a question more to himself than to the lad. “Does not everyone wish to love?”
Hope intended to have her answer. She stood with her slim legs slightly parted, her feet braced firmly and her arms crossed over her chest. “I asked if you wish to love.”
Colin did not know why he chose to answer the lad. He guarded his emotions well and spoke of his hopes and dreams to no one, yet his answer slipped from his lips on a mere whisper. “Aye, I do wish to love.”
Hope heard his ache and understood his reluctance in admitting his feelings. She so often buried her own hope and desire to find love that she recognized another who did the same. And before he could once again shield his emotions, she asked, “A binding love?”
There was no hesitation when he said, “A forever love. I wish to find forever love with a woman and make her forever mine.”
A tingle rippled in her stomach. “That is a long time.”
“When you truly love, forever would not seem long enough.”
The dark night prevented her from seeing his face clearly but at that moment she could see without actually seeing. And she knew he wore no charming smile and his dark eyes did not sparkle with sensual mischief. His handsome face portrayed emotions he rarely allowed anyone to see. His eyes betrayed his loneliness and his lips ached to kiss a woman he forever loved.
At that moment Hope felt they shared a common bond, and she understood him almost as well as she did herself.
Lady joined them, poking Hope’s hand with her nose.
“She appears to finally be finished,” Colin said.
This was one time when Hope wished that Lady had lingered longer.
Colin took the lead and walked toward camp. Hope followed with Lady by her side, wishing that she could slip her small hand in his firm one and hold on to him tightly. But he thought she was a lad and at that precise moment she felt more like a woman than she ever had.
Chapter Six
Hope walked all morning, although she was offered rides. The day was much too beautiful not to walk. The sky was a clear blue and the ground a carpet of vibrant greens with dashes of colorful wildflowers, deciding it was time to rear their heads to welcome spring. Besides, the pain in her ribs had subsided to a dull ache she could handle, so walking was no great chore.
She was never much for giving into any degree of pain, though she had learned that emotional pain could cause greater suffering than physical pain. She had learned that lesson when her parents had taken ill and died, so the dull ache she now experienced was easy to contend with.
The men were helping her with most all of the chores Colin gave her, allowing her plenty of time to heal. It seemed that every time she lifted even the smallest weight one of the men would appear by her side and tend to the chore.
She worried that Colin would grow annoyed with their protectiveness and order the lad to tend to his own fair share of the work. She would gladly do the work if the men would allow her to. And yet Colin, while well aware of what was going on, made no mention of it. In a strange way, his silence signified his approval.
The thought of the Irish Devil’s elite warriors tending to a young lad’s care warmed her heart and made the small group all the more endearing to her.
And as for Colin?
“He is handsome, is he not, Lady?” Hope asked, her eye on Colin who sat his horse with discernible confidence.
Lady issued a grumbling growl, which Hope took as a positive response, allowing her to continue to speak her mind.
“It is not just his looks.”
That remark caused a rolling grumble from Lady.
Hope looked down at the dog. “It is not,” she insisted. “He is an unselfish and caring man. Look at the way he treats Harold. He could be much harsher on the lad and he is not. And—” She paused and gave Lady’s snout a gentle tap. “He is tolerant of you and your cowardly ways.”
Lady whimpered softly.
Hope raised her eyes once again, settling them on Colin. “I think him a fine man with good character.”
Her eyes widened as his glance settled on her. Her voice had been low so no one could hear and he was a safe enough distance away that he could not have heard her words, yet he looked at her strangely… almost as if he sensed her thoughts had been on him.
He rode slowly toward her, his mare confident in her strides and in the man who held her reins.
Hope possessed a strong confidence of her own, which Harold demonstrated by keeping a steady glance on Colin as he approached.
Lady, on the other hand, was easily intimidated and one look at Colin caused her to hurry behind Hope as they continued walking.
“Are you feeling well?” he asked as he brought his horse alongside the lad.
“Aye, I am,” she answered with a firm nod.
He smiled, a teasing one that Hope favored. “Do you often talk to your dog?”
The truth always came easily. “All the time.”
He understood, as she knew he would. “Lady is a good friend.”
“My best friend. I can confide in her.” She laughed. “And be certain she keeps my confidence.”
“And do you harbor dark secrets, lad?” Colin asked in a low, conspiratorial tone that was meant to tease.
Hope played along, looking to the left and right of her, Lady doing the same, and then lowering her voice to a mere whisper so that Colin had to lean down to hear. “Aye, I do. A deep dark secret that no one must ever know.” She pressed a finger to her pursed lips.
“Share it with me,” Colin said. “You can trust me to keep it.”
His teasing manner faded, for his words sounded sincere. He wanted the lad to know that he could trust him to keep his confidence, that he was his friend. The lad surely needed one.
Hope had no doubt he was a man of his word and that the lad could trust him with almost anything—anything, that is, except this secret.
Colin watched as doubt welled up in Harold’s eyes, and he wanted to climb down off his horse and offer the boy comfort, a comfort he himself had never been offered as a child. But the lad had pride and strength Colin admi
red and he did not wish to offend him, so he stayed as he was and instead offered him friendship.
“When you are ready to share your secret I am ready to listen and whatever way is in my power to help you, I will. Remember that and never fear to trust me.”
How Hope wished at that moment she could tell him all and that he would help her. But his loyalty was pledged to the Irish Devil and if he learned her identity he would do as he must and return her to her uncle. And then she would never get to truly know him or to finish her adventure. She wished for both, though someday the truth would be spoken and then—she did not want to think of the consequences.
“I will remember,” she said, her words heavy with the weight of her secret.
“We will arrive at Croom Abbey shortly and end our day’s journey at the village, hopefully with good news to take home with us.”
“Do you think this woman you seek might be there?” Her necessary deceit disturbed her since she had always spoken the truth. Yet presently the truth was causing him and his men anguish.
“You have barely survived your travels; think then if a woman could do as well. And a woman who is accustomed to being attended to, her every whim met and her every need fulfilled.”
“Spoiled, is she?” Hope said with a laugh, recalling how her aunt and uncle often accused each other of doing just that in their own ways. And it was because of their unselfish and loving natures that she now possessed her own spirited nature. She was forever grateful to them for all they had given her.
Colin’s charm surfaced easily. “All women are spoiled, Harold. Learn that now and you will better deal with them.”
“How so?” she asked, curious to hear a man’s view on women.
“All women expect something from a man.”
“What do they expect?”
He laughed and shook his head. “They do not know themselves.”
Hope wore a confused look. “Then how do you know that they expect?”
He turned a confident grin on her. “Because I know women and each woman I have known has expected something from me. Whether it was attention, a kiss, a touch or more, they expected and I made certain they were not disappointed, which endeared me to them even more.”
Hope found their discussion interesting. “And did you do this to please them or you?”
“My pleasure is gained by pleasing them.”
She thought a moment and then asked, “So you please but do not love?”
He did not pause in his answer. “I love in my own way.”
“And yet you wish a forever love.”
“Which is why I search so hard to please so many women.” He chuckled at his own response.
Hope, however, found his flippant remark sad and all too telling. “You hope to find the one you wish to love forever. Do you not grow weary and disappointed in your search?”
The lad was much too astute. He ached for the love of one woman. A woman who would care, truly care for him. Not for his good looks or his charming tongue but simply for who he was, a man in need of love.
He kept his thoughts to himself and answered with his usual charm. “The fun is in the search.”
Hope stopped walking, which caused Colin to bring his horse to a halt. She looked up at him. “When you are ready to tell me your secret, the one you refuse to share with anyone, then I will trust you and tell you mine.”
Hope walked off, Lady prancing beside her, leaving a stunned Colin to himself.
Croom Abbey was smaller than most abbeys that Hope had visited, though it was well maintained and the nuns friendly and welcoming. A generous amount of food was offered to the men while Colin spent time with the abbess.
In return, as the men finished their meal they offered their services to the nuns. Repair work that required a man’s strength was soon seen to and Hope found herself on her own since Lady decided a nap was to her liking.
She wandered the ground, aching to bend down and sniff a blossoming spring flower, but a lad would not stop to sniff flowers. So she used her wits and leaned over to pick up a small rock that lay near a bright yellow flower and then gave the rock a forceful toss.
She sneaked more sniffs and tossed more rocks until the sound of Colin’s voice brought her to a halt not far from a narrow window at the back of the abbey. The other voice caused all color to drain from her face.
The gentle tone, the clear soft lilt, was all too familiar. It belonged to Sister Bernadette. She was a distant cousin of her aunt Elizabeth and she could have kicked herself for not remembering that she had recently been appointed an abbess.
“She is that stubborn?” Colin asked with a hint of laughter in his voice.
“Determined,” the abbess corrected gently. “Hope was always determined. Shamus could never say no to the child. He indulged her most every whim.”
“Spoiled her, did he?”
“Nay,” the abbess said. “While indulgence can spoil, in Hope it created a remarkable strength of character that gave her determination in all she chose to do. She is intelligent and adventurous and oftentimes fearless.”
“Has she ever run away before this?”
“Nay, she has been an obedient child.” The abbess laughed softly. “I contradict myself, but you see, Hope always managed to barely remain in the boundaries of her world. She did what was expected of her and found ways to do the unexpected and not embarrass her aunt and uncle.”
“Then why run away now?” Colin asked curiously.
“I could but venture a guess, though I must tell you that Hope will do what is expected of her. She will return and marry the man her uncle has chosen, unless …”
“Unless?” Colin prompted, all the more curious.
“Unless she finds love, true love. She has searched for it in her own way and I think this is why she ran away. She took a chance that her adventure would bring her the love she ached to find.”
“Foolish, romantic notions,” Colin said while thinking himself wrong. It did not fit her character.
The abbess sighed. “Hope is far from foolish and romantic.” She shook her head. “Hope has much love to give a man and in return needs to be loved just as strongly and deeply. While some young women think to be protected and cherished by the men they love, Hope intends to protect and cherish the man she loves.”
The more Colin learned of Hope the more he admired her and the more he wanted to meet her. “I have been told that she is a mere wisp of a woman. However could she protect?”
The abbess laughed heartily. “You must know Hope to know she is capable of most anything.”
“Capable of surviving on her own?”
“As strange as it may seem to you, I do not fear for Hope’s safety. She is much too intelligent to act unwisely, and I am confident that she is well and will return when she is ready.”
“I do not wish to be rude, so forgive me when I ask whether you would tell me if you have seen her?”
“You need only to ask me.”
“I appreciate your help,” he said with a respectful bow of his head.
“Now let me see that the sisters have treated you well.”
“And let me see that my men have assisted the sisters where necessary.”
“Your help is greatly appreciated and we will reward you with our prayers,” the abbess said and walked toward the door.
For a moment Hope stood frozen in place. She could not let the abbess see her; all would be over then.
She heard the door close and silence descended around her. What was she to do? How could she keep from the abbess’s sight until they left?
The sound of Lady’s anxious barking drew her attention. Lady knew the abbess and liked her. Hope hurried around the corner of the abbey and came to an abrupt halt.
Lady was wagging her tail furiously and running toward the abbess.
There was no time to think—only to react—and Hope reacted. She ran straight for Lady.
Lady, however, was much rested from her nap and was delighted t
o see an old friend, especially one who had always indulged her with a treat. She ran with an enthusiasm Hope had long thought she had lost.
Colin stood staring in disbelief at the scene in front of him. He had never seen Lady so agile or move so quickly, and Hope ran with a remarkable speed for one recovering from bruised ribs. If they were not careful they would collide and Colin did not wish to see that happen. He stepped forward, about to intercede.
Hope caught Colin’s movement and she chanced a glance past him to the abbess. The stunned expression on the short, plump woman’s face warned Hope that she had immediately recognized her.
“Lady!” Colin called out in a commanding tone that demanded obedience.
The dog instantly halted in her tracks, though her large paws scrambled to stop herself and she ended up on her bottom only a few feet in front of Colin, wearing a confused expression.
Hope was almost breathless by the time she reached the animal, and she placed a firm hand to her sore side, hoping the pressure would help dull the stinging pain.
The abbess stepped forward. “She is a playful dog.”
Lady barked and thumped her tail on the ground.
Hope stared in silence at the abbess, her eyes begging the aged woman to keep her secret.
The abbess reached down and patted Lady’s head. “I think she wishes to have a treat.”
Lady barked loudly in agreement.
The abbess turned to Hope. “Would you like one as well?”
Hope nodded, understanding that the abbess wished to speak with her privately.
Colin watched the trio walk away and shook his head. He wondered over Lady’s strange actions and a thought struck him like lightning.
He called out. “Excuse me, Mother Abbess.”
The woman turned around slowly. “Yes, my son?”
Colin approached her. “I was told that Hope traveled with a large dog and the lad here, Harold, found this dog along the road. Would you know if this dog belongs to Hope?”
The abbess looked down at the large dog. “She does seem familiar.” She looked back at Colin. “To be truthful, the dog was not full grown when last I visited with my cousin.”
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