by Liz Lovelock
“Oh, Joey, don’t worry. I’ll be fine. How have you been?”
I shove a bunch of fries in my mouth and wait a moment before I answer. “I’m doing good. My boyfriend broke up with me. You remember Nathan?” I put more fries in my mouth.
Mom’s head tilts to the side, and her lips form a pout. “Oh, honey, I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t get to meet him. He’s a jerk. All men are.” She reaches out and puts her hand on my knee and pats it.
“It’s okay. You’re right, Mom. He was a jerk as are all men. Do you remember my old college boyfriend, Kane?”
Her finger comes up and taps her temple, then it pops up straight like she’s had an idea. “Oh, oh, yes. He was such a sweet young man. Whatever happened to him?” She licks her fingers loudly, sucking off the excess sauce.
Lovely young man, my ass. If only she knew the truth.
It’s probably better not to fill her in on all the details of the past. “I ran into him this weekend . . . twice, actually. He seems to be doing good.”
Of course, he’s doing great. He was oblivious to what he walked away from when he left me standing in the campus hall. I still remember the echoing sound of his runners as they rubbed over the flooring. It was raining outside, and the weather matched my mood. It was all over, red rover. There was no discussion, just pure hurt and heartbreak. It seemed as though he didn’t care how he’d left me feeling or that I had tears streaking my face.
“That’s good. You should marry him.” She gives me a wink before turning back to the television.
“I don’t think I’ll be marrying him any time soon, Mom.”
“Why not?” She stays facing forward.
How do I answer this? “Um . . . well, first off, we don’t date anymore. We haven’t for a long, long time, and for all I know, he has a wife.” He doesn’t. Well, if he does, he doesn’t wear a wedding band.
“Oh, pish posh.” She swipes her hand backward and forward. “You hold grudges, Joey.”
My mouth drops. “I don’t,” I say, perhaps a little too harshly.
She gives me a warm smile. “Yes, you do. I remember when you were growing up, you would ask about your father, and when I wouldn’t tell you anything, you gave me the cold shoulder for an entire week or until I made you your favorite cake. Then, I recall when you were dating that Kane boy, he came over knocking on our door. I let him in, but you wouldn’t talk to him.”
Wow, her memory is good. I was mad at Kane that day. I know exactly what day it was—the day I got angry because he was all flirty with some other girls and completely forgot to meet me for lunch. Who wouldn’t have been furious? He’d been my boyfriend, and he’d put me last.
I open the wrapper of my burger. It smells divine. Even if this food is terrible for me, but damn, it tastes so freaking good. “Mom, I’ve grown up a lot since then. Yes, I wanted to know about my dad . . . what little girl wouldn’t ask? Now, I don’t care. But Kane always put me last.” I shove the burger into my mouth and take a huge bite.
“So, forgive him.”
“Easier said than done,” I say with a mouthful of food.
Mom reaches out and smacks my leg. “Don’t speak with food in your mouth. I taught you better than that.”
I swallow. “Yes, you did. Sorry.”
We eat the rest of our meal with the only sound coming from the show Mom is watching. I’m not really interested in it, but I’m enjoying listening to her laugh at the stupid humor. It brings a warmth to my heart that only mothers can. I always enjoy our time together. I make a mental note to come back more, but work makes it hard. Although now I don’t have Nathan occupying my time anymore, I’m sure I’ll have plenty of opportunities to see Mom.
An hour later, I say goodbye and leave. My eyes burn with unshed tears. It kills me that Mom is here. She has such a sweet spirit that I wish others could see—not only the nurses, doctors, and fellow occupants of this place. No matter how hard I wish, she’ll be here for the rest of her life.
Now I have to go home to an empty apartment and decide what to do with my life. I lived with Nathan for two-and-a-half years. He was always there, and if he wasn’t, then I knew he wasn’t far away. The sounds of him brushing his teeth before bed, his humming in the shower—these were all things I’d become accustomed to hearing or seeing. Simply the sense that he was home with me was comforting. It’s all gone now.
A sad, empty bed awaits me. This might be easier if I had a dog or something, but since I travel a lot, keeping a pet wouldn’t be ideal.
My phone pings from inside my bag. I dig it out from the bottom and frown.
Nathan: Why have you given me all the bedding?
Me: Because I don’t want anything of yours around me. Use them in your next apartment.
Even though I kept two sets, the sheets I use now are my favorites. They are colorful, whereas the ones that are his favorites are all white, gray, and black. I love color in my life. I’m past the days of gray and dismal homewares. I want bright, vibrant sheets—something new to look forward to when I go to bed.
Another message comes through.
Nathan: You could have handled things better than you did today. I wasn’t happy with you dumping my stuff.
Me: Be angry all you want. You deserved it for the way you ended things with me. You didn’t let me talk, you didn’t want to discuss things. So, you know what? I don’t care what you think. Have a damn good life.
Damn, that feels amazing. Never again will I date someone who doesn’t see my worth.
Chapter Twelve
Jolene
The last three days have gone quickly, and it’s back to work nice and early tomorrow. Surprisingly, I’m looking forward to it. I’ve eaten my weight in ice cream and cake. I blame Adele for that sugar overload.
Sitting on my window seat, I stare down at the street—traffic lights change colors, and cars of all makes and models cruise around.
Any normal person would probably be a blubbering mess after the kind of breakup I’ve just experienced. And I have shed tears when I think about his reason why—my mother. But if he can’t be compassionate toward my family and me, then I don’t want anything to do with him. Nathan is a chapter in my life that, like Kane’s, will simply define me as a person. This will be a chance to show my strength, to be better in every way possible. My mother is my number-one priority, and that won’t change.
No more tears are going to fall when it comes to Nathan. I’m no longer hurt. I’m angry. I’ll use that anger and remind myself that nothing good can come from being in a relationship. I’m destined to be single for the rest of my life.
I laugh to myself at the thought. Hopping up, I head to my bedroom. My room. I rang the apartment owner today and got Nathan’s name taken off the lease, and it felt freeing in a way—like I’m proving to myself I don’t need a man, and I don’t.
In my room, I go straight for the closet. On the top shelf there’s a box—one I keep full of trinkets that mean something to me. I have photos of myself, old school friends, and a certain old boyfriend. There are even things in there that caused more heartbreak than a relationship breakup ever did.
My fingers land on the small white wooden box full of memories—mostly good ones. The golden latch is still down. Going to my bed, I sit, and my fingers touch the clasp just as my phone rings. After putting the white treasure box aside, I run to the coffee table. The number isn’t one I know. Hesitantly, I swipe.
“Hello, Jolene speaking,” I answer.
There’s silence on the other end.
“Hello?” I say again.
“Jojo? That you?”
My head spins when the deep, thick voice comes through the other side. It’s so familiar and ingrained in my memory. What is he doing calling me? I didn’t give him my number.
“Kane?” I say. I need clarification. Perhaps I’m hearing things. It could be the wrong number. Then I remember, he’s the only one who calls me Jojo. My stomach twists.
“It’s
me.”
Goosebumps spread from my head to my toes. “Why are you calling me, and how did you get my number? Can’t you just leave me alone?” I fire at him. All the peace I was feeling earlier has evaporated.
“I have my ways.” I can hear the smirk on his face through his voice.
Urgh, I don’t want to deal with him tonight. Or the way even his voice sets me on fire, in a good way. I hate that he still has that effect on me. Damn you, body, for betraying me.
“Adele,” I state. Now I know what she meant when she said not to be angry with her. I’m going to rip her another hole to breathe through. How could she do this to me? “I’m going to kill her.”
He chuckles. It causes butterflies in my betraying stomach. I press my hand there, willing them to go away, but they don’t.
“She saw the fireworks between us.”
“You’ll be lucky if I don’t set you on fire,” I seethe.
“Oh, come now. Don’t be like that. I wanted to talk to you about a business opportunity.”
Now, it’s my turn to laugh. I sit on the couch—my legs have started to shake. I’m a bag of mixed emotions. “You must be joking, right? I don’t want anything from you.”
“It will pay very well.”
“Nope. Go find yourself someone else.” I don’t want to hear it. I’m tempted to hang up, but even my arms and fingers betray me. They continue to hold the phone to my ear as I listen to his voice. His warm, deep, smooth voice.
“This job is only for you. I need you.”
He needs me. Tingles burn in my lower abdomen. “As tempting as that sounds, the answer is still no. We have history. Bad history.” He has to already know that
“Please, Jojo . . .” He lowers his voice. It sounds alluring.
“I’m sure that seductive voice is something you use on most girls these days. It sure worked on me back in college. Not now, though.”
“Oh, ouch.” The humor thick in his tone. “Jojo . . .”
“Stop calling me that.” I raise my voice and huff out a breath.
“Fine,” he grits out. “Jolene, I really need your help.”
I aimlessly glance at the time. I need to end this call and prepare for work tomorrow. Kane isn’t going to get anywhere with me tonight. “Find yourself someone else.”
I end the call with him still talking. I sigh heavily. My entire body has an electric current pulsing through it. He’s managed to set me alight without even trying. I only heard his voice. I shake my head. Imagine if he was standing in front of me—I probably would have crumbled like a building being demolished.
Now he has my number. I find Adele’s name in my phone and hit the call button.
She answers on the first ring.
“I hate you.” My voice is low and deadpan.
“Whoa, why?” Her shock is evident.
“You gave my number to Kane,” I yell his name down the phone. “How could you?”
“Oh, yeah, that. I did warn you not to be mad at me.”
“Why would you give my number to him?”
“How could I not? If he’s still that player you remember, then maybe a one-nighter could be on the cards for old time’s sake to help you forget that dick, Nathan. What’s a little harmless fun?”
She really thought that I’d be okay with this. There’s no way I’d get in bed with that man again. I gave him myself years ago—he doesn’t deserve the more mature curves of my body.
“He rang just now to offer me a business proposition.” I sigh.
“Oh, what was it?” There’s hope in her words.
“I didn’t want to hear it. I hung up on him.”
“Oh, you suck big time. You need to hear him out.”
“Why? So, I can get hurt again? No, thank you.” I fall back onto the couch, rubbing my temple. A dull ache has formed behind my eyes.
“Pfft, you’re gonna be a spinster your whole life now?” She huffs.
“Yep.” I smile. “I’m going to get a whole lot of cats and become a cat lady. Might even get some dogs. Dogs are good companions, and they’re loyal as well.”
“Oh, burn. Well, with a friend like me, you won’t become a cat lady. I’m only allowing one pet, and I believe you’re not allowed pets in your apartment,” she states matter-of-factly.
“I still can’t believe you gave him my number. If I wanted him to have it, I’d have given it to him.” Not that I ever would.
“Get over it, girl. I’m helping a sister out. Suck it up, princess.”
I really want to be angry at her, but I can’t be. I now have his, and I can choose to block or ignore him.
“Gee, you’re like this annoying sister who likes to butt into people’s lives.” I drop my hand from my face. I’m going to need some painkillers. The stress from the weekend and now Kane is building up and causing my head to feel like it’s splitting in two.
“Yep. You love me, though.”
“I do. I’ve got to go kill a headache. I’ll talk to you when I forgive you.”
“You’ve already forgiven me.” She laughs.
I don’t laugh, only not because I don’t love her—my head is throbbing. “Whatever.”
We end the call, and I grab some painkillers from the bathroom cabinet, put the box back in its spot, and curl up in bed wanting to forget the last hour.
As soon as my eyes shut, darkness consumes me, and my dreams soon turn to Kane.
Chapter Thirteen
Jolene
“Hey, Cammie.” I smile as she comes in and helps get things ready for our next flight. Thankfully, it’s not a long one today. I love going to new places and seeing new things. I wouldn’t want to work in any other industry. I’m happy where I am. Although I do love it when I get to go home to my bed at night.
“Hey, how was your weekend?” She puts another courtesy pack out on a business class seat.
“Yeah, all right. Full of drama. My life could be a soap opera right now.” I chuckle. So much happened this past weekend, I think the Kardashians should bring me into their drama-filled family.
She turns toward me. “Do tell.” She raises her eyebrows questioningly.
“Long story short . . . I’m now single, got drunk, ran into Kane again, went and saw my mother, and, of course, dumped everything of my boyfriend’s at his parents’ place, and filled up on all things full of sugar. I have my best friend to thank for the extra pounds I’ve added to my waistline.” I check the list off on my fingers as I name each item.
Cammie’s mouth hangs open, then snaps shut. “Damn, girl. That’s a rough few days. I was talking to some of the other ladies this morning, and I mentioned that guy, Kane. Most of them know who he is. One said that he runs the ladies his father hires off because he breaks their hearts.”
That sounds like Kane. Always one to leave a trail of broken hearts behind him. “Hmm . . . that’s Kane Taylor, all right.”
Cammie’s eyes bug out. “Taylor? As in, Taylor Airlines, the private jet company?”
I frown. We just lost our best pilot to them—Carter Clynes. I guess they had the right price tag. Was that what Kane wanted to offer me—a job?
I shrug. “Yeah, that’s him.”
“Damn.” She breaths.
“Okay, well, best get back to work.” I nod and get back to work while stewing on the business offer that Kane rang me about. What reason would he have for offering me a job? None, unless he felt guilty and was trying to fix the error of his ways. But listening to Cammie and what others have said, he’s still the same person. Still, perhaps that money would be something I could use to help my mother stay where she is.
“If you ask me, I think you dodged a bullet by not sticking with that guy.”
“Tell me about it.” We’re just about to start boarding passengers when someone steps onto the plane. I glance over. He’s not in one of our pilot or host uniforms. “Uh, excuse me, yo . . .” My words cut off when the body spins toward my voice. “Kane?” I frown, not believing he’s right here in
front of me again. My legs become like Jell-O.
He rushes toward me. “Jojo, we need to talk. I really need to discuss something with you.” His eyes beg—plead actually. They hold my gaze, and I’m lost in his dark chocolate eyes.
I turn my back to him, shaking my head. “You need to get off. We’re about to start boarding. Go fly your rich daddy’s planes.” I sneer. I don’t have time for him today or ever. Why should I?
“Please,” he continues to beg. It pulls at my heartstrings a little, but only a very tiny bit.
I face him front on. “I really don’t have time for this. Do you want me to lose my job because you’re holding me up?”
He opens his mouth to answer when a hoard of people begin entering the plane.
“Go,” I hiss and push his black suit-covered chest. Damn, he feels firm under there. He’s hot. Being a pilot really suits him, and don’t even get me started on the suit that hugs him perfectly. I catch the glint of his badge. It reads Taylor Airlines, and ‘Pilot’ is written in capital letters below the business name.
His beautiful face drops, and he nods. The action and the defeated look on his face hurt my heart. They shouldn’t, though. He doesn’t deserve my empathy.
“I still want to talk to you. Just give me fifteen minutes when you finish work.”
“No.” I’m firm and have nothing more to say. While my chest aches with guilt for not hearing him out, my mouth knows exactly what to say to save my state of mind. I busy myself, and when I turn around, he’s gone. “Thank goodness.” I sigh, swiping my hand over my already smooth hair.
Pull yourself together, Jolene. You have a job to do.
Cammie rushes up to me. “Was that who I think it was?” She peers over her shoulder.
“Yep,” I breathe. “Anyway, I don’t want to talk about it. We have work to do.”
As cabin leader on these flights today, I have to keep my wits about me and not let stupid men get in my damn head. Kane has managed to wiggle his way into my thoughts so much more since I ran into him on my last flight. Perhaps it’s fate. We have unfinished business that I think needs to be resolved, and then I can put that part of my past behind me.