Bookish

by Olivia Hawthorne

  I handed them to her and watched her make faces in front of the mirror, most of them essentially looking like blue steel from that Zoolander movie.

  “They look good on you,” I offered, hoping to quell her rising annoyance. I felt like I’d done something to piss her off, but didn’t quite know what.

  “Meh,” she shrugged and took them off, “I don’t think the whole nerd look is really for me.” She handed them back to me, I used my shirt to wipe the greasy fingerprints off the lenses and put them back on. “I didn’t realize how blind you were though, how do you see without them?”

  “I manage I guess,” I replied. Chloe was funny, most of the time she was upbeat and airy and I didn’t take offense to her pokes and prods at my looks and my character. Tonight was different somehow; there was a mean tension under her words that gave them sharp barbs.

  We made our way to the ballroom in the hotel’s East Wing and found our table. We were pretty far from the guest of honour table, the one where Isaac would most likely be. Several authors I loved were there as well, I’d already met them all but wouldn’t mind a few more autographs.

  “Shitty table,” Chloe muttered, “I can’t see a thing.”

  “Well, it is a mix and mingle,” I replied, “I think we’re supposed to get up and talk to people.”

  “Aren’t you suddenly the part expert?” she said and brushed her strap down so it hung off her shoulder. She really was beautiful; I wish she didn’t act so weird every time somebody else got a little male attention.

  “Let’s go get a drink,” I said and stood up.

  “Oh, so now you’re drinking too?” she asked and stood up, following me towards the bar.

  “Just a couple,” I replied, “it goes straight to my head so I have to be careful.”

  We stood in line and listened to the gossip going on around us. The one thing I detested about the book world was how fast rumours spread and how quickly they became distorted. I heard a couple people mention me, not by name, but only as, “the one who talked to Isaac.”

  We got our drinks; I let Chloe order us each a vodka and cranberry juice. I was game, getting a little urinary tract boost while I got my drink on.

  “Oh, I see some girls I met today, stay here and I’ll be right back,” Chloe said suddenly and left before I could reply. She found a small herd of girls who could have all been her cousins. They were all shorter, curvier and prettier than I, and I was overcome with a sense of being on the outside.

  All my life I’d tried to fit in, but the key word is tried. When you have to try, it’s not fitting in. Popular girls never try, it just happens…they take to social graces like ducks to water and I’m always left paddling on the bank like an ugly duckling.

  I watched them laugh and giggle and sipped my drink. I’d never been a giggler either, I just didn’t get it. I was more of a dry, ironic chuckle kind of girl. I think I’d always been that way, but just a little more sad since the death of my parents.

  I walked to the edge of the room and stood back, watching everybody move and talk, mix and mingle. Have I mentioned how much I hated public events?

  Somebody bumped my arm and I jumped, spilling a little of my drink. “Oh shit, sorry,” the woman said and breezed past me. I gulped back the rest of it and stood there with melting ice cubes in my glass.

  I was feeling a little warmer than usual, but nothing too major. Still, I was a lightweight so I decided to forgo another drink right now and nurse my cubes. I stuck one in my mouth and began to chew, wondering what the hell I was doing in a place like this. I really should have gone home.

  I was minding my own business and in mid crunch when I felt a hand on my arm. A perfect, strong but not too strong, dry and warm hand. Isaac.

  “Can I get you another drink, love?” he asked in my ear. I finished cracking the last of the ice, swallowed it and turned to him.

  “I’m–” I started to say but a stray piece of ice got caught up in the back of my throat. What I ended up doing was practically choking as I coughed and attempted to breathe. Tears hit my eyes and my face went hot, I was probably bright red as I hunched over, gasped and wheezed.

  Chapter Five

  Why did I have to fall and now choke in front of the hottest man in the world? Why did I have such horrible luck when it came to Isaac, and yes, men in general?

  “My god, are you okay?” he asked and patted my back gently, “I know I have strange effects on girls, but this is the first time I’ve made one choke.”

  I took one last long, shuddering breath, wiped my eyes on the back of my hand and saw a streak of black make up. I couldn’t stay down though, but I didn’t want him to see me like this. Why didn’t I have a pair of sunglasses in my bag?

  I finally waited long enough that it was getting awkward, so I stood upright and said, “Whew, that was crazy.”

  “Seriously, are you okay?” he asked, his hand still on my back, firmly placed between my shoulder blades.

  I looked up at him with my bright red hot face, my teary streaked eyes, and I smiled and said, “Yes, I promise, I’m okay.”

  “You have something here,” he said and lifted his other hand to my cheek to brush something off. I was essentially in his arms and I wasn’t fainting. I was making progress around him at least, barring the whole choking incident just now.

  “Thanks,” I replied.

  “It’s an eyelash,” he said and held his thumb in front of my face, “blow on it and make a wish. But you have to close your eyes.”

  I squeezed them up and exhaled a little puff of air. My throat still burned from the ice, but I managed to hold back the cough.

  I opened them and the lash was still on his thumb. “I guess I don’t get my wish,” I said and cursed the fates. Of course I’d wished for him to kiss me.

  “That just means I get my wish,” he replied and brushed the lash onto his thigh. He took his hand off my back and stood in front of me, staring intently into my eyes. The crowd around us had caught on that he was there and I could hear the women start to buzz with envious excitement.

  “What did you wish for?” I asked, my breath catching in my throat. It was strange, being here with him. It was like we existed in a bubble, a little slice of our own world where none of the people in the event mattered. I wasn’t imagining this, it was happening and our connection was real.

  “I can’t tell you that, or it might not come true,” he replied and brushed his thumb along my cheek again. “I thought I saw another lash for you, but I supposed we’ll have to limp along on my wish, love.”

  “I can handle that,” I said and swished the almost melted ice in my cup.

  He opened his mouth to say something more but was interrupted when Chloe appeared at his side. “There you are,” she said, her voice higher than usual betraying the excitement and tension she had.

  “Here I am,” I said, not breaking eye contact with Isaac, “right where you left me.”

  “Oh silly, I just wanted to get you another drink, here!” She shoved a cold glass into my hand and took the nearly empty one from the other. I had to look down and see what she’d given me, another vodka and cranberry from the looks of it, and when I looked back up Isaac was watching Chloe.

  “I just love the signature you gave me,” she simpered and wiggled her curvy body. “I’ve been showing all the girls, everybody is so jealous.”

  “Yeah,” Isaac said, “I think I have carpal tunnel from all the signing.”

  “Oh you’re so funny,” Chloe said and pushed him gently. I hated seeing her hand touch his chest, I hadn’t even touched it. Yet.

  “Seriously though, this is the hardest part of the job,” he replied and turned to look down at me, “but this makes up for it.”

  “Meeting all your adoring fans?” Chloe said, “you know Aubrey is practically stalking you on twitter. She knows everything about you.”

  My cheeks flamed red again and I sputtered, “I don’t think I know everything, I mean I follow you but it’s
not like I read your tweets on purpose. If they’re there, they’re there.”

  “I’ll have to watch out for you now,” he said and a smile played around the corner of his mouth. His eyes crinkled at the edges and I loved it when he was teasing like this. “Then again, you can’t stalk the willing.”

  There were quite a few women gathered around us at this point and I heard one of them say, “Oh my god, did you hear that? He wants that girl to stalk him. This is so romantic.”

  I gulped a huge mouthful of the drink Chloe had given me and almost choked on it. It was much stronger than the last one and had no ice to dilute it. “Do you need a drink?” I asked, realizing that’s probably where he’d been headed when he’d bumped into me.

  “Let’s get a table and I’ll send somebody for a couple more,” he said and hooked his hand under my elbow. He guided me through the crowded room to a darker corner near the side. There were several tables almost hidden behind the guest of honour area, they were decorated with gorgeous blue and white flowers and had huge swag bags at each seat.

  “Will this do?” he asked me and pulled my chair out. I picked up the bag and sat, as if in a trance.

  “It’s awesome,” Chloe said, “I didn’t even realize these tables were here.”

  “This is the VIP area,” Isaac replied and took the chair next to mine. Chloe sat on the other side of him.

  “We should have gotten these with our VIP tickets,” she moaned and looked around. Several other models and publishers were located in this zone, along with a few very well known authors.

  “I think they mean the V VIPs,” I said, hoping she’d get my meaning. She did and leaned in toward Isaac instead of gawking at the other models. I guess the one man who was interested in her best friend was infinitely more interesting than any of the others.

  “I think I’m pretty V,” she said, then blinked and added, “no, wait, I mean I’m very I. I’m such a goof sometimes.” She flipped her luscious blonde hair from side to side and wiggled a little in her seat.

  He didn’t even look at her. I took a long drink and watched him watching me. It really was surreal, he was so perfect and I was so imperfect, but somehow we had a crazy chemistry.

  It made me nervous though. He made me nervous. His bodyguards hovering just a few feet away made me nervous. Hell, Chloe’s snarky attitude was making me nervous at this point.

  He cleared his throat and said, “So I guess you get tired of models and guys like me trying to pick you up at events like this.”

  Chloe snorted behind him and I shot her a dark glare. “Actually, no,” I said, “I’m generally a little too…”

  “Nerdy. Shy. Geeky,” Chloe said from over his shoulder, “shall I go on?”

  “Let her talk,” Isaac said and swivelled around to look at her when he added, “maybe you should go get us all a drink. I don’t have anything and Aubrey’s halfway through hers.”

  He might as well have flicked her on the shoulder and told her to go make herself useful. I grinned like mad at her and she shot me daggers. When he turned back around to talk, I wiped the grin off my face and said, “As I was saying, no. I tend to be pretty reserved I guess, and not exactly a huge guy magnet.”

  “I find that so hard to believe,” he said and reached up to graze his thumb across my cheek. My skin burned under his touch.

  “Another eyelash?” I asked and took another drink.

  “No, I just wanted to touch you,” he replied and smiled.

  I sipped my drink and tried my best not to fall a little farther, but with those intense eyes and that amazing smile, it was difficult at best.

  When it came to resisting Isaac James, I was turning out to be a colossal failure.

  Chapter Six

  “I got you another one,” Chloe said, perfectly timing her return to ruin our strange and intimate moment.

  I took what appeared to be another vodka and cranberry from her and finished off the previous one. For somebody who wasn’t used to drinking, I was holding my own. I thought.

  “Where are you from?” Isaac asked and took a drink of his own. A gin and tonic, Chloe had announced, she’d discovered while researching him online.

  “I was born in Belgium,” I said, “My parents were living there at the time.”

  “Oh wow, Europe, how exotic,” he laughed, “how old were you when you came to Seattle?”

  “We moved to Texas first, Houston, then came here when I was eight.”

  “Do you have brothers or sisters?”

  “Nope, I was an only child,” I replied. I inwardly cringed, knowing where this was going. Some comment or question about my parents and suddenly I went from normal to orphan girl in less than sixty seconds.

  “So your parents reached perfection on the first try?”

  “Something like that,” I said and we laughed together. “How about you?”

  “Well, I’m the youngest of five. I guess it took them a while to get their perfect child,” he said.

  “Or they just gave up hope,” I replied and shot him a sidelong glance. I had a pretty dry sense of humor, I hoped I hadn’t gone too far.

  “Did you just dis me?” he asked and put a hand up to his heart in mock horror.

  “Why yes, I do believe I did,” I said and wondered where this easy side of my chatter was coming from. I took a sip of my drink and tasted the bitter tang of alcohol. Ah, that’s right, it was the booze. The drink was making me witty and nonchalant enough to keep his attention.

  “I like that,” he replied and twisted his glass in his hand, “I like you.”

  Chloe was listening, hanging on our every word. She was pretending she was on her phone, on Facebook, but I knew she was dying to hear what was being said.

  Just then somebody cleared their throat in the mic at the guest of honor table and they began to talk.

  God, I couldn’t focus on what was being said, I just didn’t care. All I cared about was that I was living out my fantasy, sitting in the VIP section at the biggest book event in our city with the hottest man in the world.

  As they droned on making announcements about the food, drink, and dancing, I sipped at my vodka and cranberry until it was all gone. Drink number three, and I didn’t feel that bad.

  I was feeling sleepy though; the event had just taken a turn for the boring. I wished we could escape and go off somewhere away from the prying eyes and annoying crowds.

  Isaac rubbed his hand up and down the side of his glass and tried to appear interested. He seemed as restless as I felt though, his leg jumped up and down under the table and his ran his hand through his short, thick hair every few minutes.

  “I hate this part of these things,” I whispered to him, “this is why I’m usually home by now.”

  “You’re a smart girl,” he whispered back, “I’m afraid I get stuck at this part most of the time.”

  “There’s your problem right there,” I said, “you’re wanted by too many.”

  “You fly under the radar, love?” he replied, “I don’t know how you manage, with your sexy librarian thing going on.”

  “You’re the second person to mention that today,” I said, “I swear it’s not deliberate. I like to think of it more as crazy cat lady bookworm in training.”

  “You are hardly a bookworm or crazy cat lady,” he replied with a grin.

  “I said in training,” I told him, “I have a few years before I officially join the club.”

  “There’s a club?” he asked, his voice still a delicious whisper. God I loved his accent.

  “Oh yes, there really is. Once I’m accepted I will complete the initiation and they’ll send me my crazy cat lady starter pack.”

  “What does that include, love?”

  Oh, the way he said love, like he meant it. It made me believe he meant it. “It comes complete with my membership card, an old moth eaten cardigan, and ten kittens in a box,” I replied and watched his face light up. I almost giggled when he started to laugh.

  Chloe�
��s evil glare shut me down. She said, “Shhhhhh,” and made an angry face at me over Isaac’s shoulder.

  “Sorry,” I mouthed at her and turned back to the front of the room where somebody was handing out a golden dildo award for the hottest sex scene in a novel. I was excited to see the latest book with Isaac’s abs on the front was in the pack.

  When they announced it, Rebecca Hawk stood from the head table and grabbed the mic. She was clearly already a little tipsy and gave a hilarious speech about her writing. I barely heard a word though, Isaac had moved his hand to mine on the table and I could barely breathe.

  I wanted to lean back and sink into his arms, fall against his chest and feel his warmth wrap around me. The booze was definitely making me a little more tartish than normal.

  I started to sway ever so slowly, moving backwards an inch at a time, wondering if he’d get the hint and reach for me.

  I was back far enough that it was getting precarious, I was about to sit upright thinking he’d never touch me, when I heard his chair drag along the floor and he pulled himself right behind me.

  I felt his free arm drape casually on my shoulder, his other hand stayed on mine on the table, and I released a sigh of absolute bliss as I leaned back completely and felt his hard body against mine.

  Neither one of us spoke, and I could feel his heart through his chest. I swear ours were beating in time with one another, it felt that perfect.

  He jerked his body and removed his hand. I sat up and realized the very tipsy Rebecca Hawk was calling for Isaac to come to the front and accept the golden dildo with her.

  He whispered, “Sorry, love,” in my ear, his hot breath sending a shiver through my body, and stood. I almost fell, grabbed the table and steadied myself.

  Maybe the vodka was getting to my head more than I thought. I looked at my drink and it was gone, I turned to look at Chloe and she was gone too.

  The crowd erupted in wild cheers as he made his way to the front. Ever the perfect showman, he had his arms out encouraging their screams and sexually charged chants.

  “Isaac James, take it off! Isaac James, take it off!” the left side of the room started to yell. Before he reached the mic, the entire room had joined in, the sound throbbed against my head and the floor shook with women stomping their feet and chanting their demands.