He didn’t have a strong desire to talk to her, especially since he was uncertain of her marital status, but he kept catching himself looking at her, and he had no idea why. During the last five years he had not been attracted to other women. He wasn’t interested in falling in love again, and the few times he felt a little drawn to someone, he always dismissed it and asked God to take it away. He didn’t feel it would be appropriate for him to become romantically involved with any of the unattached women at his church. And he didn’t know a lot of other women. He honestly didn’t feel the need to remarry. He often wanted Annika back, but not someone else.
“Do you want to go to the hotel before the meeting?” he heard Linda ask Sarah when they had finished with dessert.
“I didn’t bring my Bible with me,” Sarah said, seeming to suddenly realize it. “Or a notebook, or anything to write with.” She laughed. “I guess I was a bit nervous earlier.”
“Do you want me to walk with you?” Linda asked.
“Oh, it’s too far to walk,” Sarah said, appearing embarrassed.
“Too far? Where are you staying?”
“It’s a ten minute drive from here. I wasn’t thinking when I made the reservations.”
Linda smiled and gave her a hug. Andrew realized he was eavesdropping and tried to turn his attention elsewhere. But everyone was beginning to leave, so he simply rose from the table and fell in step with George and Linda as they headed for the main auditorium. Linda and Sarah stopped to use the ladies’ room, and he and George went on ahead to find them some seats. He got brave and asked George the question on his mind.
“Where’s Sarah’s husband?”
“He passed away three months ago. Levi Whitfield. Do you remember him?”
“Oh, sure,” he said. He hadn’t thought about Levi in years, but he was an unforgettable man. If Levi was doing a workshop, he always went to hear him talk. He hadn’t connected with him on a personal level, but that man knew ministry. That man knew the Bible backwards and forwards. And Andrew had often been challenged to go deeper in his knowledge of the Scriptures after an hour of hearing Levi speak.
“How did he die?” he asked.
“Heart attack. He was fifty-one.”
“Wow. That’s only two years older than me.”
“And three years younger than me,” George said.
“How’s Sarah handling it?”
“Hard to say,” he said, entering a row of chairs and taking one of the middle seats. Andrew stepped past him to take the seat on his left so Linda could sit by her husband when she came to join them. “Linda talked her into coming here this week. Hopefully it will help.”
Andrew didn’t feel more attracted to Sarah, knowing she wasn’t married, but he did feel something for her. He felt her pain, and he wanted to help in some way, but he had no idea what she might need from him.
He turned his attention to the program for the evening, and he was blessed by the worship and everything coming from up front. But he was having a private conversation with Jesus throughout the next two hours. Whenever his thoughts turned to Sarah, which was a lot, he prayed. He prayed for her to be comforted and blessed through her time here. And he prayed for himself and the strange feelings going on inside his heart. He kept having this vision of being alone with Sarah sometime this week: walking down the street beside her, having dinner with her at a restaurant, having her with him in the car when he drove out to The Farm. He didn’t ask God to remove his private thoughts, but he did ask for help in making sense of them and not allowing him to do anything that wouldn’t be in Sarah’s best interests.
When the meeting ended, he planned to slip away quietly from Linda and George, go back to the hotel, call home, and then go to bed. Tomorrow he would be sitting with the same people for breakfast and stay for the first meeting of the day. He had called his in-laws this morning and told them he would be out there around lunchtime, and he knew Tate and Sonya would want him to at least stay through dinner.
He expected Linda and George to hang around talking with others, and he supposed Sarah would stay with them. He didn’t think of her earlier comment about her hotel being so far away until he tried to say a casual good night to Linda, and she asked him something.
“Did I hear you say you have a rental car, Andy?”
“Yes,” he said. “It’s back at the hotel.”
“If we all walk together, could you give Sarah a ride? Otherwise she’ll have to take a cab.”
“Sure,” he said. “Are you going back now?”
“We can.”
“Linda,” Sarah interrupted. “I know you two want to stay. I can call a taxi. It’s fine.”
Andrew waited for someone to speak, but when no one did, he went ahead and said what he was thinking. “You two night-owls can stay here, and Sarah and I could just go.”
Sarah didn’t appear too petrified by his suggestion, but he wanted to make sure that would be all right with her. “Unless you’re not comfortable with that.”
“No, that’s fine,” she said, smiling sweetly at him. “Thank you. I’m sorry I was such an idiot about this. It looked a lot closer on the map.”
Linda gave her a hug and said something Andrew couldn’t hear, but Sarah seemed appreciative of her words. “I’ll see you tomorrow,” she said. “You too, George.”
“Good night, Sarah,” he said. “Sleep well. Will you be here for breakfast?”
“I’m not sure. Don’t wait for me. I should be here for lunch though.”
They stepped away together, and Andrew didn’t say anything until they were outside, but not because he was being shy. Couple after couple stopped Sarah on the way out to give her a hug and say some kind words. It was obvious Levi Whitfield’s wife had been as beloved by everyone at this conference as Levi. No one really seemed to take note of Andrew’s presence by her side, and he did nothing to try and draw attention to himself. He sort of felt like he was an angel or something. Keeping a watchful eye on his assignment at hand, seeing everything that was happening to Sarah and yet no one realizing he was there.
But Sarah knew he was, and once they were outside she apologized for the delay. “Funny how I thought I would be invisible here.”
“Why would you think that?” he asked.
“Levi was the social one. Everyone knew him.”
“They obviously know you too.”
“Yes,” she said. “It just surprises me.”
“I’m not sure if Annika ever got that either.”
“Got what?”
“That she and I went together. If people knew me, they knew her too. I know she felt invisible a lot of the time, but she definitely wasn’t.”
“Wasn’t?” Sarah asked.
“Oh, she passed away,” he said, realizing Sarah would have no way of knowing that. “Five years ago.”
“I’m sorry,” she said. “I didn’t realize.”
“I still wear my ring,” he said. “Never felt right to take it off.”
She didn’t reply, but he knew what she was thinking, and what she needed to hear. “You wear yours as long as you need to, Sarah. That’s for you to decide. No one else.”
Between the walk to the car and the drive to where Sarah was staying, Andrew got to know more about her family-life; the different places she and Levi had lived during their twenty-five year marriage; how they had met; and how things were going for her since he’d been gone.
He knew she wasn’t telling him everything on that, but she was making the effort to be honest, and he didn’t pry any deeper than she seemed willing to go. Pulling up to the front of the hotel to let her out, Andrew informed her of his plans to go visit his in-laws tomorrow but offered to pick her up and take her to the church sometime before he left.
“That’s all right,” she said. “I’m not sure when I’ll be going over. I can take a cab.”
“I’ll be back for the meeting tomorrow night, so I could give you a ride here after that.”
“Thanks. I’ll p
robably take you up on that,” she said, opening the door to let herself out.
“And Sarah?”
“Yes?” she said, turning back to face him.
“If you want to talk, I’m here, okay? I know what you’re going through and how hard it is. You don’t have to pretend it’s not with me.”
She nodded but didn’t say anything.
“Good night, Sarah. Sleep well.”
“Good night, Andrew. Thank you.”
***
Sarah had been crying herself to sleep more often than not during the last three months, and she had imagined doing the same thing here, especially on the first night. It was the first time she had ever slept alone in a hotel room in her entire life, and yet it felt strangely peaceful. Lying there thinking about the evening, she allowed the comforting words of others to have an effect now as well, and she was looking forward to going back tomorrow and having the chance to talk more with some of the women she had only briefly encountered tonight.
Linda was her most outspoken and “pushy” friend, and she needed that to get her here, but there were others she could confide in too, and she wanted to hear more about their lives also, not just be sharing her own struggles.
Before she went to sleep, her thoughts turned to Andrew. All through dinner she had enjoyed having him near and watching him because he reminded her so much of Levi. She honestly felt like God had purposely put him at her table and connected him with George and Linda years ago for her sake tonight. She had taken a step of faith by coming here, believing God wanted her to, and He had confirmed that by putting a Levi look-alike at her table for dinner on the first night.
But on the way back to the hotel, once she realized Andrew was a widower, his presence had become more of a possible God-sighting for her. He knew what she was going through and was willing to talk if she needed that. And she thought maybe she did. She didn’t know if talking to an unmarried man at the conference would be appropriate for her right now. Just walking by his side from the auditorium to the front door had felt awkward, but talking with him in the car hadn’t felt that way at all. And if he drove her here tomorrow night, she supposed that would be the best time to share whatever she needed to--or at least whatever Andrew could manage to pry out of her.
Chapter Five
When Abbie asked about the concert again on Tuesday during lunch, Grace asked her something she had suspected from the beginning. “You’re trying to set me up, aren’t you?”
“Me? Set you up? Would I do that?”
“Yes!” she laughed. “Like once a month. Who is it this time?”
“He’s a really great guy, Grace.”
“Who is he?”
“Oh? Are you interested?”
“No, I’m not. I’m just wondering who he is and where you met him.”
“His name is Mick, and he’s my downstairs neighbor’s brother.”
“Mick? As in Mickey Mouse? Your downstairs neighbor’s brother? Abbie? What have I done to deserve this?”
“He’s nice. Mick is short for Michael. Michael Townsend. Doesn’t that sound like a respectable guy?”
“Does he go to church?”
“Of course. I know you better than that.”
“And how do you know him? Have you gone to all of your neighbors and asked if they know any good twenty-something men for your lonely friend?”
“Lonely? I thought you weren’t lonely?”
“I’m not! But you must think I am if you’re always trying to do this to me.”
“Okay, calm down,” she laughed. “If you don’t want to meet him, I won’t force you, but he is a nice guy. I’m not just saying that.”
Grace waited for her to go on. Last night Tabitha had told her she and Ryan were planning to go out with some friends after the game on Friday, as long as Ryan was feeling better by then, and Grace told Tabby she could go even though Daddy would still be out of town. She had been too restrictive with Danae, and she was trying hard to not do that with Tabby.
“I met him about a month ago,” Abbie said. “Eliza and I walk together in the evenings sometimes. We don’t have a set schedule, but if she’s going, she’ll come up and see if I want to go, and I do the same with her.”
“How did you meet Mick?”
“I stopped by to see if Eliza wanted to walk, and he was there. She introduced us and wasn’t able to go walking with me because they were heading out, but we talked for a few minutes and then the next week when Rick got the tickets for the concert and he had two extra, I decided to ask Eliza if she and her roommate wanted to go with us. But they’re going to Women of Faith this weekend, so they couldn’t go to the concert, but Eliza said Mick might like to go. She gave me his phone number and I called him, and he said he wanted to and would try to get one of his friends to take the other extra ticket, but when none of them could go and he called back to say it was okay if I wanted to give the two tickets to someone else, I thought of you, and I asked him if he would mind being set up on a blind date, and he said no.”
“So, you had the courtesy to ask him if it was all right, but not me?”
“I knew you’d say no. Come on, Grace. He’s a really nice guy.”
“And you know this from meeting him once and talking to him on the phone about some concert tickets?”
“Sure. I can tell these things. How do you think I ended up with a guy like Rick?”
She laughed. “You ended up with Rick because he came up to you one Sunday after church and asked you out.”
“Yeah, but I had to say yes.”
“I can’t date a guy whose name rhymes with your boyfriend.”
“Why not? What dating-rules book did you get that out of? Come on, Grace. Please? I want you to go with us. You don’t get out enough, and with both Tabby and your Dad gone on Friday, it’s the perfect opportunity.”
“I have to be back by midnight. That’s Tabby’s curfew.”
“We can do that. It’s only in Monterey.”
“Who’s driving?”
“Rick.”
“I’ll think about it.”
“Think fast. It’s in three more days.”
***
“Are you sure you can’t stay for dinner?” Sonya Andriessen asked Andrew as she walked him to the front door of the historic but well-maintained farmhouse where Annika had grown up.
“I’ll be back on Thursday,” he promised her. “I really need to head back tonight. There’s someone I need to talk to.”
Sonya gave him a smile and a hug. “Well, it was good to have you here for a little while today.”
“And it was good to be here,” he said. “It always is.”
“Even without Anni?”
“Oh, I miss her. You know that. But even without her, it’s a good place. You and Tate make it good.”
Andrew stepped out the door and descended the front steps. Getting into the rental car, he gave his mother-in-law a wave from the open window and headed out the long driveway toward the country road. It was a forty-five minute drive to Des Moines, and he wasn’t certain why God wanted him back for dinner, but he knew He did. He had been thinking about Sarah since he woke up this morning, and he really, really wanted to see her again.
Pulling into the church parking lot with only a few minutes to spare, he found a space and headed for the dining room. It was mostly full, but his place at the table was empty, and he managed to pull out his chair and nearly sit down before George noticed his presence.
“Hey, what are you doing back?”
Andrew answered him but glanced at Sarah as he spoke. “Just decided to join you all for dinner. It’s harvest time at The Farm, and I didn’t want to be too much of a bother.”
Sarah smiled at him, and he smiled back.
“I’ll be in their way this weekend enough as it is.”
“Well, good to have you,” George said. “You missed a little excitement around here today.”
“Oh? What’s that?”
“George, stop,
” Sarah said.
They both laughed, and Andrew looked at Sarah. She was blushing. Andrew waited for one of them to explain. “Sarah got herself a bit lost, but we found her.”
“I went for a walk,” Sarah elaborated. “There was no need to send out a search party. I was on my way back.”
“Two hours later!” Linda interjected. “You just scared us. That’s all.”
Andrew didn’t comment and turned his attention to the person up front making some announcements. After the blessing was given over the food, Andrew redirected his gaze to Sarah, and he watched her until she glanced his way. Linda and George were talking to one another, and he took advantage of the semi-private moment, holding her gaze and wishing she could read his thoughts.
I want some time with you later, Sarah. I have a little proposition for you, and that’s why I’m back.
She seemed intrigued by his obvious staring, but not uncomfortable. She glanced away after a moment, and he turned his attention elsewhere for now, asking Colton how his day had been and what interesting workshops he’d attended. Throughout the meal Andrew glanced at Sarah occasionally and often found her talking to Linda or the woman on her right. She seemed more relaxed and comfortable than she had last night, but her sweet and gentle spirit was the same. And her smile. She had a beautiful smile.
This evening’s schedule was identical to yesterday’s, but instead of sitting around for dessert as they had last night, Andrew excused himself, saying he wanted to call home. He hadn’t talked to any of his children today, and he needed to go back to the hotel to get his Bible and notebook.
He went into the church lobby to make his call, but not before giving Sarah a subtle look, letting her know she was free to follow him. He caught Grace and Tabitha at home, and he talked with them both. Tabitha asked him about going out with Ryan and some friends after the game on Friday, and he told her that was fine as long as she was home by midnight. Then Grace told him about her potential plans of going to the concert, and he assured her that was fine. He knew she didn’t get out nearly enough, and there was no reason for her to be sitting at home by herself while her seventeen year old sister was out having a good time.
October Joy (Moments In Paradise 1) Page 4