I Carry Your Heart (Heart Series Book 1)

by C. M. King

  His thumb grazed along my jaw and lifted my chin, turning my face back so I was forced to look into those bright blue eyes.

  “Joel, I’m fine, a little sore but that’s to be expected.”

  His face dropped at the mere mention of pain, almost like he was berating himself for being the cause of it. This was what I was hoping to avoid. I didn’t want him needlessly torturing himself, with something so trivial.

  I soothingly stroked his face and kissed him lightly on the lips. “Do you think you could make me some of your amazing scrambled eggs? I’m starving.”

  My distraction plan had the desired effect. He leapt up smiling, eager to tend to my every need. I knew making breakfast would be a good diversion, to keep his mind from the dark thoughts he possessed inside.

  “Anything for Madam,” he said, in an overly exaggerated posh voice.

  I sat up and watched as this beautiful, fine figure of a man, strolled out of the room in all his naked glory. He really was perfect and a huge smile spread across my lips, knowing he was all mine.

  * * *

  Twenty minutes after showering and dressing I stood leaning in the doorway. I smiled, admiring the gorgeous view of Joel, in nothing but an apron cooking breakfast. I watched the muscles on his back, flex with every movement. My eyes dropped down lower and I bit my lip, imagining sinking my teeth into his perfect peach bottom.

  Oh hell.

  I was officially turning into a pervert.

  Especially now I felt my body flush, at the very thought.

  As if sensing my presence he turned around grinning, continuing to stir the scrambled eggs in the pan. “You okay?” he asked, looking puzzled by my goldfish like stare.

  I was more than okay.

  “Yeah, just admiring the view.” I sighed, pushing myself off the doorframe and walked through into the kitchen, to take my seat at the table.

  Joel chuckled, shaking his head in obvious amusement. “Well you’re just in time, sit down breakfast is ready.” He finished off serving the eggs and placed the plate down in front of me. My eyes greedily took in the delicious sight, I was more than ready for it.

  “Mmmmmm looks tasty.” I grabbed my cutlery, ready to enjoy every single morsel.

  He handed me my coffee. “Enjoy.” He kissed my hair and I smiled.

  He didn’t have to tell me twice.

  After breakfast Joel cleared the plates away. I began to wash the dishes and placed Joel on drying duty. Though it was debatable how much drying he was actually doing. At every available opportunity he kissed and touched me. Not that I was complaining, if anything it made me crave him more.

  After the last kiss I decided payback was in order, and placed a large blob of soap sud on the end of his nose. I laughed and ran off, putting the table between us.

  “So it’s like that hey?” An evil smile crept over his face. He took his time wiping the sud off with the back of his hand, chuckling as he slowly stalked over. His eyes quickly surveyed the quickest route to reach me. They sparkled with obvious delight, I could tell he was enjoying the chase.

  My eyes narrowed and I stepped sideways to my right, to which he followed. I backtracked to my left, but we were now mirroring each other’s movements. I shrieked when Joel leapt over the table, like a panther stalking its prey. His body effortlessly slid along the wood, landing with such precision. He grabbed me before I barely had the opportunity to run.

  He lifted me straight off the floor and I screamed, struggling to break free from his hold. He placed me down on the drainer, pinning me in so I was trapped. I closed my eyes and accepted my fate, waiting for my humiliation to happen. I was hoping he wouldn’t be too cruel but to my surprise it never came.

  I popped open an eye, to find him staring so intensely it almost took my breath away. I grabbed his face, so we were barely inches apart. “Joel, what’s wrong?” He was beginning to scare me. I wondered what on earth had brought on his sudden change in mood.

  He swallowed slowly, his eyes never leaving mine, like he was struggling to find the right words. “Izzy – last night was – amazing, I’ve never felt anything like that before. It’s always been just sex before, but what we shared was something else – beyond anything I’ve ever known–”

  I smiled at the sweetness of his words. “I know, I never thought my body was capable of feeling so many emotions, the things you did to me…” I blushed unable to continue. The feelings inside were so overwhelming, the way he brought my body to life. It was all still really new to me and I found it hard expressing myself how I would like. My face flushed at the awkwardness of it all, and I sought solace, pushing my face into the crook of his neck.

  His fingers soothingly stroked my hair. “You do the same to me Iz, you undo me in ways I never knew possible. The feel of your body against mine, the connection, the intensity, it consumes me and I can barely breathe, I need you so much it scares me.”

  My head snapped up and my eyes automatically sought out his. I could see the fear he held there inside, it was the same that was buried deep in mine. “I need you too Joel…always.” I pulled him in tighter, to reassure him the feeling was mutual, that the same deep intensity ran through me too.

  “I hope that’s true,” he whispered, so softly I barely heard him.

  I pulled back staring in surprise. I was wounded that he still didn’t understand the way I felt about him. “Of course it’s true, how can you even doubt that? Joel, you’re stuck with me forever.” I kissed him hard with so much emotion, so he’d never have a moment of doubt again that my love for him was real.

  He pulled away almost breathless. “So we’re stuck together, forever?”

  “Yes, you, me, forever,” I panted, dragging him in closer, not wanting to waste a moment longer talking.

  “Sounds perfect.” He groaned deep into my mouth, grinding his hips into me. My hands skimmed slowly down his hard, muscular back, resting on his tight bum cheeks and I squeezed each cheek tight. I pushed my tongue in further, kissing so intensely, the desire beginning to build inside.

  He ripped his mouth away and I gasped from the shock, the overwhelming feeling of rejection filled me. He lifted me, placing me down on the ground.

  Had I done something wrong?

  Tears pricked my eyes, my mind desperately searching for an answer. “Joel – I thought well – don’t you want to? Is it me? Did I do something wrong?”

  Had I turned him off sex after last night?

  Oh god, was I really that bad?

  His eyes flashed with anger and his hands grabbed my face. “Izzy, how can you even think that? I’ve just told you how you make me feel, and you think I’m now turned off by you? You evoke so much passion inside, I am without a shadow of doubt totally, completely, head over heels in love with you.”

  “Really?” I asked still uncertain. I was still waiting for the moment that I’d wake up from this amazing dream.

  “Yes really, this is yours.” He grabbed my hand, directly placing it over his heart. “My heart will only ever belong to you, it will only ever beat for you. Only you will have the power to break it, its entire fate rests with you.”

  I leaned forward moving my hand, my lips pressed against his naked skin before resting my face there, feeling the beat against my cheek. “This is the most precious gift you could ever give me, I promise I will take great care of it, always.”

  He brushed away the tear from my cheek and held me close. He wrapped his arms around me and his lips gently kissed my hair. I was totally overwhelmed by his words, but it didn’t explain the rejection only moments before.

  I pulled away staring up into his bright blue eyes. “But Joel, why did you stop? Last night was beyond perfect, I thought you would want to again.”

  I knew I wanted to.

  He let out a loud exhale of air. “Of course I want to be with you again, can you not feel it.” He pressed his now large erection into me. I gasped, feeling how much he really needed me.

  “Wow, that’s impressi
ve.” I giggled, grinding softly into it.

  He instantly frowned and moved away. “Izzy we can’t, you’re sore. I’m not going to put you through any more pain, we need to wait.”

  By the torture inside his eyes, he was struggling too. “It would be totally worth it though,” I said pouting. Last night had only made my desires deepen for him. I yearned to have that connection again, for our bodies to be locked tight around each other, lost in a complete state of bliss.

  “When you’re better I promise I’m going to make this up to you.” He stroked my face and pressed his lips up against my forehead.

  “You’d better,” I warned.

  He smiled at my look of annoyance. “Izzy, I’m going to show you just how good it can be. I will drive your body wild and make you scream my name over and over.”

  I clenched with excitement, quickly moaning with the dull ache. “Please Joel, I need you so much.” I grabbed his hand, pushing it down inside my jeans, so he could really feel how turned on I was.

  He gasped when his fingers brushed against the damp satin, his eyes instantly darkened with lust. “Do you want me to make you feel better baby?”

  “Oh god yes.” I began panting, my mind racing, desire filling every single pore of my body.

  His strong, firm hands gripped me tight and he lifted me up, pressing me tight against him. My legs instantly wrapped around his beautiful, muscular body. His lips locked against mine and he carried me across the kitchen, gently placing me down onto the edge of the table. His hands quickly removed the barrier between his lips and my skin, dropping my t-shirt down to the floor. His placed soft, sweet kisses down my neck to my breasts, his touch sending me over the edge, as his fingers deftly unbuttoned my jeans.

  My body dropped down to rest against the cool, hard wood. I raised my hips feeling his warm fingers graze against my skin. He dragged down the material so painfully slow, placing kisses down the insides of my thighs. Once they were removed I felt my cheeks burn a little. I was left with just a small slither of satin, to conceal my modesty.

  A soft moan left me when he started pressing feather light kisses along my stomach, working his way down. His warm, soft fingertips slid along my skin, gently gliding my knickers down my legs.

  He let out a low growl in his throat, when I opened my legs wider, my feet now resting on the edge of the table. His eyes filled with desire, as he rolled his tongue over his lower lip in anticipation. He looked like he was about to devour me whole.

  I clenched with excitement.

  I closed my eyes, panting with anticipation, urgently needing the release I knew his mouth would provide. I groaned when his lips brushed against my clit, then arched my back as his tongue began to work me. My fingers instantly grabbed his hair, locking him in place.

  I never wanted him to stop.

  “Oh god Joel – yeah that’s what I need, just there – oh god yeah.”

  I felt his hand slide up my stomach, as his fingers relentlessly rolled and teased my nipple, the sensation only heightening my pleasure.

  “You enjoying this baby.” He chuckled, already knowing his answer.

  “Don’t stop – please don’t stop.” I pushed his head back on me, so I could continue to focus on the deep pleasure he was instilling inside. My other hand grabbed the edge of the table, gripping onto it for support, as I climbed ever nearer towards my orgasm.

  “Let me hear you baby, you know what it does to me.”

  “Oh god I’m close…so close, I can’t–” I arched my back, the orgasm ripping through me, taking with it ever single piece of air from my lungs. I whimpered slightly coming down from my high, as his tongue continued to tease my already sensitive clit. I somehow managed to drag some air back into my body, eventually unlocking my fingers from around the wood. I was almost certain I’d left indentations.

  “How was that?” He grinned, leaning over to kiss my belly button, his tongue leisurely circling inside it.

  “I think I’m seeing stars at the moment.”

  I literally was.

  He chuckled at my face, pulling me back up. “Did that manage to persuade you how much I want you?”

  “I don’t know. I might need reminding over and over again.”

  A large smile crossed his face. “I think I can manage that.” He gently ran his nose along mine, my eyes fluttered shut enjoying the sensation. Every single part of my body slowly began to unwind. I leisurely came down from my high, before selfishly remembering he had needs of his own.

  “What about you? Do you need some relief?” I slipped my hand past the cotton material, placing it on the base of his erection and squeezed it ever so slightly.

  I heard the air leave his lungs, when my hand began to move. He regulated his breathing to match the strokes. He closed his eyes and his body leaned into mine. His breathing switched the moment I started building up to fast rapid strokes. He was hard as rock but the velvety skin felt good gripped inside my hand. I loved being in control of his pleasure, watching the intense look on his face, when he lost all self-control right in front of me.

  His breathing became more erratic and he pressed his forehead against mine. His eyes remained closed, concentrating solely on the movement of my hand.

  His breath tickled my face as he panted. “Izzy – oh don’t stop – please.” I was pushing him closer to the point of release.

  God he looked so sexy.

  My mouth sought out his and his hands gripped my thighs, in preparation of his impending release. The moans grew louder as I brought him further and further over the edge, until he came all over my hand. I slowed down, milking the last few drops, before feeling him go limp.

  He broke away from my mouth, panting once again. “Izzy, what are you doing to me?” His eyes searched mine for answers. I smiled loving the power I had over him.

  “I love to watch you come undone too Joel, it’s so sexy, watching you fall apart in front of me, knowing I’m the one doing that to you.”

  “Only you can do that to me Iz, your touch alone just drives me crazy.” He wiped my hand, gently cleaning it before kissing each of my fingertips, his teeth nibbling against my skin

  My eyes stared longingly into his. “The way you look at me drives me crazy.” I nearly had an orgasm myself, watching him fall over the edge. The intensity in his eyes in the final moments, sent shivers throughout my body.

  His breath hitched slightly at my words. “Izzy, you never cease to amaze me.” His mouth quickly found mine, I pulled his body tight against me. He twitched again and I smiled, enjoying his body beginning to stir again. “I think we both need to calm down, let’s take a shower,” he said moving away.

  I grinned waggling my eyebrows suggestively. “Shower sounds good.”

  “To get us clean Izzy, nothing else.” He chuckled when I made a face no longer interested, but he didn’t give me chance to think. He lifted me up in his arms and carried me towards the bathroom.

  “You know I think you have a taste for all this now, don’t you?” he asked, nuzzling my ear.

  “Well it’s your fault, you shouldn’t be so good at it.”

  He grinned, placing me down. He took off his apron, so my eyes could roam over that lean, hard body, as he switched on the shower. “Well I got to keep my girl satisfied.” He gave me a wink and grabbed my hand, yanking me forward. Then pressed a hard kiss against my lips, before pushing me into the shower.

  * * *

  A while later I looked up to find Joel stood staring in the doorway. “You’re beautiful,” he said smiling, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.

  “I think you need your eyes checked,” I retorted, rolling my own. I looked far from beautiful, more like bedraggled.

  He climbed up onto the bed, crawling towards me and lay down with his head across my stomach. I placed my kindle onto the bedside table, as my fingers started stroking and weaving their way through his thick, soft, dark locks. He let out a loud exhale, before pressing his lips against my skin. We lay in comple
te silence, as he drew circles with his thumb gently along my stomach.

  I closed my eyes concentrating on his touch, listening to him softly humming a tune. When he reached the chorus I finally recognised the song and smiled. “That’s my favourite Lifehouse song.”

  “I know,” he whispered. “I’ve heard you sing it a million times, it’s permanently locked inside my head.”

  I smiled, feeling endeared by the fact he’d noticed something so small. I started to sing it softly as he continued to hum, our voices mingling effortlessly together.

  We must have dosed off, as when I woke the light was fading. Joel crawled up to lie beside me, our noses touching just staring deep into each other’s eyes.

  Joel broke the silence first. “I love you so much Iz.” His voice had an ache to it that began to unnerve me. The contented feeling was now replaced with an unease that left me cold.

  I cupped his face, stroking my thumb over his cheek. “I love you too Joel, more than you’ll ever know.” I kissed his forehead, hoping my words would offer some kind of comfort he was obviously seeking.

  “I know I don’t deserve you…” His voice trailed off. His eyes closed but not before I caught the look of pain he held inside them.

  I grabbed his face. “What? Why are you even saying this? Of course you deserve to be with me, stop being daft.” I knew I had moments of self-doubt, thinking the same thing. But for him to say this now, when we were so happy, something had to be wrong.

  Why had his mood changed so suddenly?

  “What’s wrong Joel, you’re scaring me?”

  He stared deeply into my eyes. I could see he was battling with some kind of inner struggle. He then closed them, as if it was too painful to continue looking at me.

  After a few moments he opened his eyes again. The look of fear was still evident, as he began to swallow slowly. I knew the signs, he was trying to work his way to tell me something bad.

  “I’m not the man you think I am, I have done so many stupid things. You are so perfect and innocent and I don’t deserve your love.” The look he gave me was so heart wrenching, it took my breath away for all the wrong reasons.