“I realized you were right.”
I dropped my hand from under my chin and looked at him.
“Really?”
“No, I saw her walking down by that doctor’s cubicle. I’m sorry. I had to check. It’s just who I am. That’s all I was doing up there, anyway.”
He made some weird gestures with his arms. He looked ridiculous.
“Oh, yeah?” I urged him on.
“Yes. I was testing the waters. If they were worried, I mean honestly worried and not just trying to get money from you, then they’d keep you overnight themselves. But they just wanted to cover their asses from insurance companies. Trust me.” He reached for my hand.
“So you did all of that to just see how serious my damage was so I wouldn’t have to pay anything more than I’d have to?”
I thought about it for a moment. It was sort of like my idea, only a little better.
“Yes.”
He smiled. He was very proud of himself.
“Really?”
I stared at him to make sure. I was smiling now, of course, but I was trying not to. I had to know he was being honest and not Joe honest. However of a good point he made, he still shouldn’t have been so rude to the nurse. He especially shouldn’t have been so rude to me.
“Really. What’re you contemplating over in that head of yours?” He asked.
“Honestly? I can’t help but wonder what this Sebastian guy looks like.” I said, nonchalantly looking back out the window.
We were far from the hospital, but the image was burned in my mind more than my desire to argue about manners.
“Why? Are you remembering anything?” Joe asked as he instantly lit up.
“I’m not sure. That’s why I’m asking.”
“Oh. Well, he had black hair that wasn’t gelled, but it was slicked back. He looked kind of like a greaser.”
“What’s a greaser?” I was curious.
“Geez, you really are that young?” Joe grinned. I'd forgotten he'd heard me tell the nurse my age.
“Or I’m just uneducated.”
I realized both were sort of an insult but that one sounded better.
“Hmm. Do you know what the pompadour hairstyle is?”
“Nope.”
I was laughing, now. This Sebastian guy was really a total blank in my memory. Maybe it was just a guy waiting for the bus. Had the bus gone by?
“Alright. Well, if you don’t know any of those things, odds are you aren’t remembering him. I can show you everything I’m talking about when we get back to your place.”
I was instantly reminded he’d be spending the night. Things were either going to be really awkward, or really good. I wasn’t sure which I hoped for yet.
What do we do
now?
((hypocrites never get anywhere with their morals intact))
The taxi pulled in front of the building and stopped with a jolt. It reminded me that I had been in the car this whole time. Joe got out and tried to smile at me as he held the door open. My brain wasn’t ready for that much thought, yet. I didn’t even think to check the meter to pay the guy. There was no need to feel guilty, though. Joe was the one who had dragged me out here, caring or not. I was a very grumpy, tired person.
Walking like a zombie, I trudged to the front door. Almost as soon as I had reached my hand out to the handle, Joe was there. He put my arm over his shoulders and carried me to my apartment. Why was I so exhausted? Was this a side effect? The warmth of his hand on my forehead sent chills down my spine. I was glad he could read me so well. He was so good to me when it boiled down to it. I wished I could remember more about him and what we had shared. I felt like I might have loved him.
Spike jumped all over me the second I was inside. His kisses made all the pain go away. Smiling at Joe, I had a feeling his would have the same effect. Butterflies danced on my cheeks. Spike kissed me again and knocked me on the ground. Laughing out, Joe tugged him back. Then it hit me. Spike didn’t even seem to notice Joe. He didn’t even bark at Joe when he walked in the window. That should have been my first clue of safety. Spike would never lead me in the wrong direction. He was such a good dog. I was lucky to have such amazing pets.
My heart dropped. I missed Wilson. I hated this place for making me give him up; even if it was for the best. I wished I remembered giving him away, at least. The family rang a bell, but we couldn’t have honestly had a very good exchange if I wasn’t aware of it. I could only imagine how distracted and distraught I must’ve been.
“Do you know?” I leaned down and whispered to Spike. “Is he okay?”
Spike seemed to understand me. He gave me that sideways look that was so adorable. Of course, he could have just been waiting on dinner. When was the last time I'd fed him? Where were his bowls even at? Had I even walked him recently, other than Tuesday? Poor dog. I was the worst.
“Is who okay?” Joe asked.
There was a weird tinge to his voice that suggested jealously. Was he really trying to ruin this moment I was having with my puppy over his own insecurities?
“My ferret. I don’t remember selling him, but the lady called me earlier, asking questions about him.”
“Well, at least you know he’s in a good home.”
I looked at him curiously. How could I have known that Wilson was in a good home if I just said I didn’t remember giving him up? I was looking too much into it. It was late. I needed sleep. Things would only get worse the longer I stayed up.
“Hmm, yeah. I guess you’re right.”
I stood up and wandered into the kitchen. I wasn’t sure what all I had or if the movers had gathered my food or not. Maybe I'd gathered it? I really need my memory back.
Joe walked around me and sat himself up on the counter. Spike rested his head against his leg and both of them were watching me. I felt like they were animals in a cage begging for food. There needed to be a safety sign like the one they have at zoos on the invisible cage bars keeping them back, and that one tire rope for entertainment behind them. I laughed to myself. It was quite the ridiculous spectacle.
Shaking my head, I started the adventure for food. In the fridge was my first clue that I had, in fact, done this. The bacon was in the bottom drawer, the mayonnaise was in the second level, and the poptarts were next to the milk. No one would have put their poptarts in the fridge. I'd definitely done this.
When I started getting a frying pan from under the stove, Spike almost couldn’t contain himself. He knew what was happening. That massive tail was beating a rhythm on the floor and his head was watching my every move. I could hear the slight whimper if stood still long enough. I smiled.
With the crackling of the bacon settling in, the silence became obvious. I guess we hadn’t really conversed that much in the taxi. This whole time, I had been blaming it on being tired, but it was something else. There was a weird pain in my side. Something was calling to me and I couldn’t remember. Was Joe feeding off of that? Did he think I was still upset with him? I hoped I made it obvious, but I couldn’t be sure. I wasn’t really sure of anything, other than getting Spike his treat.
As if he had been listening to my thoughts, Spike looked at Joe then back at the frying pan. He was making sure Joe knew he was more important. Joe did notice. He grinned and patted his head. That dog had a good character. He was so good to me to forgive me with just a few strips of bacon. I thought about how life would be if it were that easy, but in a sense, I guess it sort of was. Everybody had something that made them forget about all the pain inside of them. Something so simple as a few slices of bacon.
Speaking of, I wasn’t so sure that Joe was it. Was that my inner struggle? Is that what was tugging at my side? Could we both tell that the spark was only a short lived fling that we'd created because we'd wanted it to be there? That it actually wasn’t anything at all? I was jumping to rash conclusions. I hadn’t even given him a chance. Everything was so rushed between us. I bet if we sat down and there was nothing hanging over us,
I’d figure it all out. Was he nervous too? How were we going to make it through the night?
“You don’t have to spend the night, I’ll be okay.” I said.
I didn’t want to make eye contact. As I said the words, I could feel his heart break. I was a terrible person. He deserved some of it from earlier, I supposed; I had forgotten about the way he had acted until I mentioned it. Suddenly, I wasn’t feeling so guilty anymore. I was such a stupid teenage girl, tugging and pulling on his emotions as the wave pool of my own couldn’t make up its mind. I did want him to stay, though.
“The doctor insisted.” He replied.
It was almost as if he knew what I had been thinking and wanted to spark my temper. He pushed my buttons perfectly. In an instant I went from loving him to wanting to disrupt his life in every way possible. Were we the perfect match?
“Since when do you care what doctors wanted?” I mumbled.
“Since you did.” He whispered.
I thought about that for a second. Did he just insult me?
“Haven’t you had enough of pushing me around?” I said.
I didn’t know why I was saying that. It felt as if someone else were pulling strings attached to my body and using my voice as a recording. I had been thinking it. I had wanted to ask him why he pushed me, but I would have never said it. What was happening?
“And I explained myself to you!” He laughed in disbelief. “I cared enough about you to take you to the hospital, yes, that was my idea. But I didn’t want to put you through unnecessary testing that was going to cost you for all these things. They may be doctors, but that doesn’t mean they can’t be greedy.” He said.
“You think I’m still stuck on that? I was talking about the literal hands you placed on me when you were trying to be suave with that nurse.” I sneered.
It was my voice, now. He was back to being egocentric. I could never date him.
“What?”
He sat upright and crossed his arms. Was he testing me? Did he think that I was afraid of him? Tears swelled up in my eyes. I resisted the urge to show weakness.
“You pushed me up there. You put your hands on me and pushed me away while you were talking to her.” I said.
“Why are you so jealous?” He laughed.
I was crying. The anger in my arms made the pot shake. It was rattling on the burner. Spike barked. My reflexes made me jump and some grease splashed on my arm. Joe was off the counter in seconds and coddling me.
“I’m sorry, that was nasty of me. You have been through so much these past couple days. Heck, you’ve been through enough just today. It’s okay to be stressed out and have an overload of emotions, but it is not okay for me to take advantage of your fragile state and hurt you. I’m sorry.”
He was right. I hated him for it.
“I deserved some of it, for calling you those things outside of the hospital.” I cried into his shoulder.
“I deserved it, all of it. The only thing I don’t deserve, is you.”
I dug into him deeper. I was such a bitch.
“What else is bothering you?” Joe whispered, very softly rubbing my hair back.
He knew me better than I thought. Hopefully, he was just asking about my mom. He knew about her. I wondered how that conversation had gone. I'd let it slip by me at the hospital. That must’ve been something crazy. I could have never been calm about it.
“Nothing.” I lied.
I pulled back from him and tended the bacon. I couldn’t possibly tell him my thoughts were torturing me over Sebastian. There was this itch that I knew him. It was in the pit of my stomach. It was almost as if I missed him. It freaked me out. Joe was staring at me. I wiped a tear away and turned the burner off.
“Mirabelle.” He whispered.
It wasn’t a condescending tone but more of a nurturing tone. He was letting me know it was okay. He wasn’t dumb. The words he'd said earlier were true, I had been through a lot. I was allowed to let my mind wander away from him. Maybe I was the jealous one. Maybe because I would be upset he’d be thinking of another girl right now, I didn’t want to admit I was thinking of someone else. He stood behind me and wrapped his arms around me. His breath on my neck made me dizzy. I was thankful the grease was no longer hot enough to hurt like it did before.
Sliding over to put the pan in the sink, Joe moved with me. It was cute in that dorky sort of way. I wanted to ask what he was doing, but I was avoiding acknowledging him. He was going to kiss me. I could feel the air, the tension, the passion, I couldn’t handle that. I was making Spike bacon. That’s all I was doing. Nothing else. His hands moved and twirled me around. Before I could even look him in the eyes, our lips were locked. He held me there until I finally gave in and kissed him back. My entire body was shaking. I'd felt this before, I knew it. I just wasn’t sure it was with him.
A plate scraped against the counter. Both of us stopped and looked over. Spike had jumped up, impatiently getting his treat. I wanted to talk, my voice wanted to coo my pet, but I was speechless. I was still tasting that kiss. I needed a second opinion.
This time I took him off guard as I wrapped my arms around his neck and dove into his lips. I didn’t hold back, and I didn’t need convincing to let my emotions speak truthfully. His arms wrapped under my legs and he pulled me up onto the counter. The dishes crashed into the sink but we didn’t stop. My fingers tugged into his hair and I could hear his heart pounding. I held his lips with mine and took in a deep breath. His eyes opened and we stared at each other. What was that feeling? Why was it only there when my eyes were closed?
He kissed me very softly and touched the side of my face.
“Your bum is going to be wet sitting on that.” He laughed.
“You put me here.” I whispered.
Our foreheads were together. His hand was still wrapped behind my ear. I wanted to kiss him again. His heart was still pounding. Moving his head to the side of mine, he blew his breath on my neck. I shivered.
“You need a shower.” He whispered.
“Hey!”
I pushed him back, laughing. Jumping off the counter, my butt was wet.
“I need to take Spike outside, first.” I said.
Instantly Spike turned his head sideways and his eyes got huge. He understood that word perfectly.
“Yeah?” I baby talked to him.
I mocked him, doing the same thing with my head. His big, disgusting, bacon flavored, slobbery tongue caught my nose. I stood up brushing it off dramatically.
“I’ll take him.” Joe insisted.
“We can go together.”
I wound my hand in his wiping all the drool I had just taken off my face on him.
“That was so cruel.” He said when he realized what I'd done.
“That’s payback for my bum.”
“Go wash the hospital off of you.” He leaned close to me, “and all the nasty kisses you’re covered in.”
“Hmm, good point.” I teased back.
He laughed and grabbed my other hand and then he kissed my nose. I smiled.
“I suppose a shower isn’t the worst.” I admitted.
“Good. We’ll be back shortly.”
He kissed me very quickly, then put Spike on his leash. I watched him step out the door and smile a goodbye to me. He was really good to me.
When the door clicked shut, I walked off to my bedroom. My bare feet stuck to the wood. I was sweating. I was gross. Joe was spending the night. I needed to pick out pajamas that weren’t too revealing or uncomfortable. After searching all the drawers for my favorite sweat pants, I gave up. Regular flannel bottoms would have to do. Setting the towel and pajamas on the counter, I turned on the water. I was so thankful the bathtub in this place was big.
I started undressing and setting all my dirty clothes in the hamper. When I pulled my pants down, I felt a weird pain in my thigh. I looked in the mirror and nearly had a heart attack. There was a huge gash on my thigh. When did that get there? How had that even happened?
Thinking no more of it, I added some oil and beads to the filled tub and stepped in. It was the perfect temperature. I closed my eyes and rested my head back on a towel. If I had some headphones, I’d feel like Pretty Woman. My entire body let out a sigh of relief.
“Mira.” A voice whispered.
I bolted up and splashed water everywhere. I didn’t see anything. Now I felt like that girl from Nightmare on Elm Street. My heart was fluttering. I recognized that voice.
“Joe?” I called out.
No one responded. I didn’t hear Spike, but then again I was almost certain that wasn’t Joe’s voice. I felt nervous and sick. I convinced myself it was nothing. It had to be my mind playing tricks on me. I was so tired. I rested my head back down and closed my eyes again. A white light flashed and I saw this black creature. I jumped, splashing water everywhere.
“Mira.” The voice said again.
It wasn’t whispering this time. It was almost commanding me to acknowledge it.
“Who are you?” I asked.
I was terrified but I tried not to show it.
“I knew this would happen. You miss me. Your heart is forcing me back in your life.”
“Who are you?!”
My voice was shaking. I had to gain control.
“Sebastian.”
His voice trailed off. My heart skipped a beat. I knew it.
“Get away from me. Get out of here! I don’t remember you. I don’t want to remember you.” I screamed.
“What else is there?” He said.
A face appeared in front of me; it was black. His eyes were violet and his hair was styled the way Joe had described earlier. I recognized it. He looked so sad. The door jiggled open and Spike and Joe came charging into the house.
Monsters & Fairytales Page 30