by Sarah Silver
As she soaked her body under the hot water, she realized that she had been alienated from the world, and that that was why she hated it. She had no idea what it was like because she’d never been allowed to experience it. All she had was what her mother told her and what she had learned in school, but she hadn’t been able to see society and the connections that people make with one another. That had left her a shell of a human being, and as she walked back to her room and got dressed she knew for certain that all that was over. She wasn’t going to live that any longer.
She grabbed her clothes, her books and finally her drawings—the false worlds she had built to replace the real one. She shoved them all in her suitcase and hid it under her bed where she knew her mother wouldn’t see.
She couldn’t tell her. She wouldn’t be heartbroken—she was too cold. She would be furious and she would try to stop her for certain. She would have to leave in secret, and she had to do it after school because that was when he said he would come for her in the note.
This boy had saved her from this sterile hell. He was her savior now; she didn’t need another. He would protect and carry her. She could ride on his bike anywhere they wanted to go, and she knew it was real because she’d actually felt his rapture running through her. She knew what love was now, and she was certain that she’d found it was him.
“MARIE!” Her mother was coming down the hall to her bedroom. She quickly hid the evidence and did her best to put on a poker face. When the door slammed open and her mother saw that she looked like a shining child of morality and righteousness, she became immediately suspicious.
“I trust you’ll be going to see the pastor today.”
“I want to go to class first. I’ll make an appointment with him on my way out. I have to hurry though. I only have an hour.”
“Alright. Get ready. I have some bus money for you.” She handed her a dollar and allowed her to make her way out the door.
Marie’s first class was calculus, which she had always excelled at. The teacher was a young blond man with a golden smile. She usually sat in the back row and decided to sit where she normally did.
She had to keep her mind on the numbers. She promised herself that he wouldn’t affect her school life. She looked at the board and saw him standing over her with his hair shining in the moonlight. She saw Drake pounding against her when the teacher stood at the front of the room. She wondered what it would be like to have her hair streaming behind her as they made their way down the highway.
The thought of leaving class right then and calling him was too much for her. Her legs shook, her mind drifted and she found herself drifting in thoughts of their night together. He knew how to move. He knew things about her body that she didn’t even know.
When class got out, it was too much. She whipped out her tiny flip phone and called him.
“Marie?” He answered on the first ring.
“Yes.” They waited silently for a second. It was as if what had happened was so magical that both of them were convinced that it wasn’t real.
“Oh, god. I love you, Marie. I have to tell you that. I love you.”
“I love you too.” She was smiling. Nothing else existed except for his voice. “Can I see you now?”
“I have to deal with something first. I wanna leave town. Can we do that?”
“Of course. I’ll go with you anywhere.” She knew that she wanted to leave.
“You wanna see the beach? We can go to Cali.”
“Yes.” She’d always wanted to go there. Her mother told her it was Satan’s summer home, so she figured it was probably the most amazing place in the entire world.
“I wanna do you in the sand.” The vulgarity of is expression stabbed at her in the same way he did last night. “I gotta do something before I see you, but I want you to meet me at the park near your house—with the pines.” It had pine trees that rose above all of the buildings around it. They called it Forest Park.
“I love you.” She didn’t want to stop talking to him, but her class was starting soon.
“I love you too.” They were silent for as long as they could be then, when she couldn’t wait any longer, she hit the end button and walked to class.
Chapter 5
Drake had his feet over his lime green couch in his studio apartment. His heart was pounding. It could all end now. He could leave this place and get away from everything. He just had to do this one last thing.
Johnathan Harper was an up and coming mayoral candidate in Pinehurst. He’d been making headway in the economic field and had promised the logging industry a huge patch of land that the city owned.
Even local politicians are bad, but the things that Drake had heard about him were unspeakable, even for a man who’d killed for years.
Drake never listened to his teachers or his parents. He wanted to have a good time, and as far as he was concerned, they were getting in the way. He thought he could make his own way, and he could if he really wanted to. At 16, his parents were living in a two bedroom shack in the ghetto and he had a bright red convertible with rims. He had more drugs in the back of that car than most people see in their entire life. Half the school was getting their grass from him—including the faculty. Then he found that there were other things that were more profitable. The Mexicans he’d been getting his stuff from gave him a call, and he had to listen if he wanted to continue doing what he was doing.
They gave him a gun and they told him where to go, and they asked him if he wanted to do it again. Once he saw how much they were handing him, there was no question about whether or not he was going to listen. Of course he was going to. He had a nice house and a nice car, but there’s always the risk. It’s the reason there’s violence in the first place.
You have to kill somebody who might go to the authorities, because otherwise you’re going to lose your life. You’ll be locked up for the rest of your life, and everything you’ve worked for will be taken away from you. You simply cannot take the risk. There isn’t a sane person in the world that wouldn’t do what it takes to protect themselves and their family. People know what they’re doing when they go to the authorities, and Drake had seen it in their faces before they died. They knew that they were doing something terrible, and they knew that that was what they were facing for trying to do it.
At the same time, their faces haunted him. Hit men aren’t supposed to learn about their targets. They aren’t supposed to talk to them. They are supposed to stay as far away from them as possible, but that doesn’t mean that every time you close your eyes you don’t see their faces, or that you can go to sleep at night without wondering whether or not you’re doing the right thing. Honestly, sometimes he knew he was, and sometimes he knew he wasn’t, but the money took him places he never thought he would go.
He knew where he was going today, so he took his beer and down the last bit so he could think about the day’s events. He’d been with a million women but when he thought about Marie’s long legs and her beautiful body, he knew that she was the one. She was innocence and he was evil. Opposites are supposed to attract.
As innocent as she was, he was going to have to do this for her.
* * * * *
He had on a pinstripe suit and geek glasses with his black hair swiped to the side, and his shoes were polished perfectly. When he walked into the office building and smiled at the receptionist, he gave her the perfect charming smile. She melted immediately.
“Hello, I have an appointment with Ralph Rosen,” his voice was deep and sultry.
She stared for a moment then shook her head. “Oh, just go up the elevator to the fourth floor and it’s the second right.” She sighed and watched him walking past. He added a little rhythm to his step.
He tapped his foot while he was waiting. He had to time this perfectly. If he didn’t it wouldn’t work. The timing was right, he just had to get into the office in less than two minutes, which he should be able to do if the elevator wasn’t coming down from the sixth floor a
nd stopped at the fifth. His heart was racing a little too fast. He took a moment to breathe and catch his bearings. It should work fine. He’d get there.
It was barely passing the third and he had a minute and thirty seconds left. It was at twenty why the door finally opened and he walked inside. Nobody was there which meant he could make his ascent quickly. He tapped his finger on the metal guardrail. Why did this elevator move so slowly?
He had a trick he used where he said each state alphabetically to calm himself down. He started with Alabama and moved down. He got it from the Krishnas. They were always a little too weird for his tastes though. The door finally opened and he ran to the empty lobby and into the empty office.
There was nothing there. The place was vacant. It had been rented for his purposes under a false name. They just wanted to get into the right place. He opened his briefcase and took out his gun. The man would be standing in the correct position in less than twenty seconds. He had the sniper rifle put together in less than that. His sight was state of the art, and his bullet was perfect.
Why wasn’t he there? Something was in the way, but he could see the lower half of the body. That would be enough. He pulled the trigger, and Drake fell over, bleeding out on top of the roof of the Red Bank.
Chapter 6
“Can anyone tell me what quantum teleportation is?” Instructor Black, a skinny blond woman, looked around the room at the stylishly dressed airheads who were either glued to their phones or the computers in front of them. None of them heard her. They simply didn’t care what she was saying, their social lives were too important.
For once in her life, Marie wasn’t any different. She didn’t care about quantum teleportation, or wormholes, or anything else. She knew exactly what it was and could coherently explain the mechanics of it, but she was too far gone into his world. In a matter of moments, she would leave everything behind and this didn’t matter at all. All she needed were the transcripts in her binder. They would get her a transfer to whatever university she wanted to go to, and her financial aid wasn’t going anywhere.
She was going to be free from all of this, and she didn’t want to hear what this woman had to say. It was like a voice talking to her when she was about to go unconscious.
“Marie? Marie?” It took a second for her to look around. The entire class was looking at her, which was strange because they’d been so intent on their screens before. The teacher was looking at her too. “Can you tell me?”
“You know what,” she got up out of her chair. “I don’t have time for this.” The students around the room started giggling. One boy actually got up and left with her. The teacher was clearly furious, but this kind of thing happened all the time.
Marie made her way to the bus stop. She had to handle this. Her mother would be home from work after a little bit, and she wanted to make sure she had everything. She wanted to do it properly.
In truth, she should be saying goodbye, but the thought of doing so simply hurt too much, and she knew she wouldn’t get very far. Her mother would be heartbroken, but she wouldn’t show it. Her reaction would always be anger to everything she did. She couldn’t just act right. Instead, she had to control her every move. She wanted to keep her there so she could watch her and make sure that she did everything she said, and if she told her, she was certain that her mother would do something to try and stop her. She might even succeed at doing so.
In fact, that was Marie’s worst fear. She really didn’t want to go home, but she couldn’t just walk out of her room with her suitcase while her mother was standing there. The driveway was empty and the house was quiet. Her mother didn’t give her a key, but she did keep one under the doormat that Marie wasn’t supposed to know about.
When she used it, the familiar smells of her old home came back to her. The parlor was dark, but she knew every single nook and cranny. She knew just what the angels on the coffee table looked like and she knew what they were saying when she stopped to admire them.
She went into the kitchen, which was the center of the home, and remembered all of the time she’d spent there learning to cook and clean. Her entire life was here and she was giving it up, but she had to. She loved Drake and she couldn’t live like this any longer. She had to see the world.
Her mother kept a tiny pad on the refrigerator with a pen on it so that she could leave a note if she needed to. She pulled it off and walked to the counter. If she couldn’t say goodbye in person, she could at least say goodbye in another way. She took the pen and poured out her feelings. She told her mother how she would live a good life and that she would always love her, but she knew that she wouldn’t ever be able to let her go. She told her how she was wrong, that the world wasn’t bad and how she wanted her to live her life too. The one thing she probably should’ve left out but didn’t was the part where she talked about her father.
Her mother lived the way she did because she was overcompensating for her father’s loss and she was bitter because of it. She urged her to move and meet somebody, or at least to have some fun in life. She didn’t have to stay cooped up forever.
When Marie was done, she left the note above the sink where her mother would find it as soon as she got home. She made her way to her bedroom to get her suitcase and her things. She got the cross of the wall and decided to keep it with her. She wanted it to remind her of home. She stuck it in the case and left.
Her mother jumped out from behind a corner. She had the note in her hand and tears were flying down her face. Her stone cold demeanor was struck with despair like nothing Marie had ever seen before. She was striking a chord and that hurt, but the woman had done it to herself.
“You ain’tleavin!” Phyllis ran at her with her fists flailing, weakly slamming against her chest. She fell to the floor in a pile of tears at her daughter’s feet. “Please. You’re all I have.”
“Mama, I’m goin and there’s nothing you can do. I love you. I’ll call you and you can come see me.”
“No! You stay here with me. You ain’t married yet.” Marie tried to push her aside but she couldn’t. Phyllis was too strong. She hit the back of Marie’s knees and the girl fell to the floor.
“Mama! You know I’m an adult. I can call the police.” The girl was crying too now. She went to hug her mother but the woman sat up and raked her fingernails against Marie’s face like a badger.
Marie shrieked and warm blood fell to the carpet. “Now you’ve done it, Mama! You push me away. You treat me like a prisoner!” She was on her feet. “You take every single bit of joy out of my life and then you attack me,” she kicked the woman in the head, “when I’m trying to gain my life back. You will never see me again.” She’d never talked like that before to anyone. “I can promise you that.” She mustered strength she didn’t even know she have when she stomped the woman’s head into the carpet till blood poured out and walked over her.
When she got to the parlor to leave, she took one of the white and gold ceramic angels on the coffee table and picked it up, she pulled her arm back to swing it onto the wall, but a firm hand stopped her then there was a sharp butcher’s knife to her neck.
“Get it your room,” the woman growled. “You ain’t leaving it for a week. You can go in a bucket for all I care, but you’re not disgracing my family.”
With one hand on Marie’s shirt collar and the other holding a knife to her throat Phyllis dragged her daughter to her room to lock the door. “It will not stop me!” According to Phyllis, defiance was one of the dirtiest words there ever was and that was exactly what was driving Marie, but she was a woman being forced into a cage. She was being asked to give up any chance of living, loving and seeing the world like she needed to do.
Her mother had her suitcase or she’d be out the door. She had to figure out a way to get it. She could try going out the window and into the front door, but Phyllis had locked that for certain—she always did. She could try banging down the door, but it was solid wood. The thing wasn’t hollow and she wasn’t g
oing to get out that way. The best she could think of was to make her way out the window and hope that her mother didn’t lock it behind her. That way she could get Drake to come and get her out of there.
Reached down in her pocket. She couldn’t believe it. She should’ve called Drake the moment this stuff happened, but it didn’t even enter her mind. He could get her out of this. He’d put her in her place for certain.
She dialed his number and waited. He didn’t pick up on the first ring, which might not go through on his end, and he didn’t pick up the second either. All that could mean was that he couldn’t reach it in time. Then the third ring came and she was starting to worry. The seconds were passing and they were supposed to have met by then. He wasn’t answering. Each and every single time she called, he didn’t answer. Something must’ve happened to him, but what? He said that he had to do something before they met, but what did that mean? Was he in danger?
She paced around, calling as much as she could. She hit the button, put it on speaker and waited, and when it didn’t work, she tried again. She must’ve called him at least 600 times by the time she plopped onto the bed.
Maybe he missed her when he didn’t see her. He might’ve just gone home thinking it was a waste, but if that was the case then why wasn’t he answering? He probably lost his phone. He loved her. He wouldn’t ignore her calls. He loved her.
She couldn’t think about the unthinkable, but also the most obvious thing. He just used her for sex. All he wanted was to be with her that one night, and he got it, and now he was toying with her. Her wailing sobs shook the whole house. She pounded the walls and kicked the closet doors. She nearly broke the window.
She was going to have to find him and kill him. It was the only way she would feel right again. Then she would leave Phyllis and go to California by herself. She was still leaving no matter what, she just needed to do it right this time.