“I’m pretty sure Zane has given up entirely on ever having a clean room.”
Astrid recognized her sister’s habit of making small talk when she was nervous, something they’d both inherited from their grandmother. She remained silent and solemn, waiting for an opening to speak.
“So, details please. What the hell are you doing with Erik? Do you have any idea how dangerous that guy is?”
And there it was. “Yeah, I do. He and his wolves killed the rescue crew I came here with.”
Ginnifer’s eyes widened. “Rescue crew?”
“Did you think I came up here to ‘immerse myself in werewolf culture’?” she asked, using the very words her sister had used before she’d left on her first expedition to Nunavut. “I came to bring you home.”
“Astrid, I…” she motioned down to her belly, which looked ready to pop.
“Is that why you came back here, because he got you pregnant? And my God, is that some sort of werewolf thing? You weren’t pregnant when I saw you two months ago.”
“It’s been almost three months since I left, and I was pregnant. I was hiding it. And I didn’t come back because I was pregnant, I came back because I love Zane.”
“You love him?” Astrid asked. She put her hands on her hips, knowing full well that it made her look like their mother. “I saw the documentary. When you first met Zane, he held you against your will. How could you possibly fall in love with him?”
That would be as stupid as Astrid falling in love with Erik.
“He didn’t know me then, but we spent a lot of time together while I was filming. Yes, you saw him being a bit of a jerk in the beginning, but you also saw him come around towards the end. You know he’s a good guy.”
In The Wolves of Nunavut, Zane had let Ginnifer go and he agreed to let her film the pack. From there, Ginnifer had shadowed the pack for weeks, though the film had become increasingly focused on Zane. He had opened up to Ginnifer about his struggles as an alpha and his aspirations for the future. By the end, it had felt like there was a connection between the two of them, but Astrid had believed it was purely the work of good editing and Ginnifer’s desire to make a compelling documentary. After all, Ginnifer had hardly mentioned the alpha when she’d returned and she hadn’t seemed at all like she was pining over him.
“No, Ginnifer, I don’t know anything about him because you haven’t told me anything about him. Hell, you spent months with me in Miami and you didn’t even think to mention that you were pregnant.”
Ginnifer put a hand on her shoulder. “I’m sorry, I didn’t want to upset you. I know how hard you and Neil tried. I figured the last thing you wanted to hear was that I accidentally got pregnant with the first man I slept with since Aaron.”
“Accidentally?” Astrid repeated. “How do you accidentally get pregnant? Why did you have sex without birth control? You’re always so careless.”
Ginnifer flopped down onto her bed and put her head in her hands. “See? I knew you’d be upset.”
“I’m not upset that you’re pregnant, I’m upset that you threw away your life—your very awesome and successful life—to come live in a cave and have a baby in the middle of the tundra. I’m upset that you lied to me for months and then disappeared, leaving me to deal with mom and dad. They gave you everything, and you just left them without so much as a goodbye. You’re so selfish!”
By the time she finished ranting, Astrid was on the brink of hyperventilating. Her face was hot with anger and she was barely able to catch her breath.
Ginnifer just looked up at her, tears in her big, brown eyes. “I know. I’m sorry.”
Astrid tugged at her hair. “Don’t do that, I hate when you do that. Can’t you please argue with me?”
Ginnifer began to sniffle. “How can I argue with you when you’re right? I am selfish, and I’m sorry.”
Astrid sat down beside her and sighed. “I can’t be mad at you if you keep apologizing.”
“Then don’t be mad,” her sister said, leaning against Astrid’s shoulder.
They sat together for a few minutes in quiet contemplation. Astrid felt completely deflated. A deep void was left where her anger had been, and in it, sorrow began to gather.
“You’re not going back, are you?” Astrid asked.
Ginnifer shook her head.
“Never?”
“Probably not, no.”
“Is he really worth it?” Astrid asked.
“Astrid…I was unhappy for a long time. But when I’m with Zane, I don’t feel like I’m just going through the motions anymore. I feel like I’m finally living my life, and baby or no baby, I couldn’t possibly go back to the way things were before.”
The way things were before?
Astrid couldn’t summon her anger back from the void. Instead, she felt tears begin to prick at her eyes. Within seconds, her eyes were burning, and she had to covertly swipe them with the back of her hand. If Ginnifer saw her cry, Astrid would go off on her again, only this time it would be a lot less yelling and a whole lot of sobbing.
It made no sense to her, how Ginnifer could take so much for granted. While their parents had hefted responsibility on Astrid and expected her to be the dutiful daughter, they had decided that Ginnifer was too creative to be stifled. When Astrid had confessed to them that she wanted to go to a famous arts school to study fashion design, her parents had refused to pay for college unless she chose a more practical major. But when Ginnifer had dropped out of her liberal arts university one semester before she was due to get her degree in medieval literature, it was only a few weeks before their mom was buying her a three thousand dollar camera so she could follow her dream of becoming an indie filmmaker.
Aside from having unconditional love and support from their family, Ginnifer was also stunningly beautiful. She was a social butterfly who made friends easily and had men enamored with her everywhere she went.
If there was one thing Astrid hated about herself, it was how much she envied her sister. There were times in her life when she would have given anything to be Ginnifer, and yet here Ginnifer sat, claiming that nothing she’d had made her happy.
Astrid couldn’t stop herself from asking, “Do you really believe that this life is going to satisfy you when nothing else has?”
Ginnifer lifted her head. “I know how this must look to you, but there’s so much you don’t know about me. And that’s my fault; I should have opened up more to you. But you have to trust me when I tell you that this is where I belong.”
Astrid tried to think of more to say, but she couldn’t. So she nodded, and stood.
Ginnifer grabbed the hem of Astrid’s shirt. “You’ll tell mom and dad that I’m sorry and that I love them?”
“Yeah, sure.”
“Do you need help getting home? Our numbers are pretty tight here, but I’m sure we can spare someone to take you to town.”
“Erik will take me home.”
Astrid knew that she’d probably regret saying this later, but at the moment, she couldn’t bear the thought of admitting the truth. It was too humiliating. She had come to Nunavut to rescue Ginnifer from the big bad wolf, and not only did Ginnifer not need or want saving, but Astrid had ended up in the claws of an even worse wolf.
And if her pride wasn’t enough to keep her from admitting the truth, there was also the added fact that Erik wasn’t likely to let her go without a fight. If she accepted Ginnifer’s help, it could cause further conflict between Siluit and Amarok. She’d already acted once without regard for the wolves, she couldn’t do it again. One way or another, she would find a way to save herself from Erik.
“What’s the deal with you two?” Ginnifer asked. “Didn’t you say that he killed your crew?”
“It was their own fault. They were planning on attacking his pack. Erik did what he had to do, and he spared me. I told him I was looking for you, and he offered to bring me to Siluit.”
Astrid was amazed at how well she sugarcoated the screwed up week t
hat she’d had.
“Wow,” Ginnifer said with a smile. “I knew the others had to be exaggerating about him. No one can be that cruel.”
“Yeah… Anyway, you mind showing me back to the main room? Erik is probably waiting for me.”
“Sure, do you mind helping me up?” she asked, reaching out a hand. With considerable effort, Astrid pulled her up. Ginnifer patted her belly. “Thanks. I can’t wait for this kid to get out. I want my body back.”
Astrid gave a half-hearted smile. “Come on, let’s get moving.”
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Erik and Zane stood with several other males by the far entrance to the main room. As soon as Astrid stepped into the room, she and Erik’s eyes met and locked. He seemed to look her over, assessing her condition, and for some reason it made her uncomfortable.
Children gravitated towards Ginnifer, crowding around her legs as she entered the room. They offered Astrid a welcome distraction, and she quickly looked away from Erik.
“There are so many kids here,” Astrid remarked.
It took Ginnifer a moment to respond, as she was being assaulted by tiny voices. “That was one of the hardest parts of filming. My agreement with Zane stipulated that I couldn’t film any of the pups. He was afraid that if outsiders knew how many little ones were here, they’d try to find the pack and,” she lowered her voice to a whisper, “poach them.”
It wasn’t the first time Astrid had heard about humans coming after werewolf pups, but it was still just as upsetting.
When they reached the men, Zane swatted at the air, ordering the children to disperse. He hooked an arm around Ginnifer’s waist, but she seemed to hardly notice him as she looked around, scanning the room.
“Where’s Tallow? I want to introduce her to my sister.”
“We’ve met,” Astrid said, cringing at the memory. “She’s not a fan.”
“Oh, nonsense,” said Ginnifer. “She’s a little rough around the edges, but she’ll warm up to you in no time.”
Zane pulled Ginnifer in close. “Tallow went for a run.”
“What? She just got back from hunting. By the way, when are we eating?”
“Gin…” Zane paused, giving his mate a pained look. “There was another attack today. Some of the wolves didn’t make it back.”
Ginnifer made a strangled noise and brought her hand up to her mouth. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
“You were so excited to see your sister. I didn’t want to take that from you.”
“What happened? Who did they kill?”
Zane pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “We’ll talk in a bit. Why don’t you say goodbye to your sister?”
“Goodbye?” Ginnifer asked. If it were possible, she looked even sadder. “Why goodbye? Astrid should stay for a least a few nights.”
“No.” Erik and Astrid answered simultaneously. Up until that point, Astrid had been avoiding acknowledging his presence, even as she’d sensed him come to stand beside her. Now, they exchanged glances.
Astrid looked back at her sister. “We really have to get going. We have a lot of ground to cover.”
Ginnifer looked like she was about to break down. “But you only just got here. You can’t leave so—”
“Suddenly?” Astrid immediately felt bad. She reached out to pat Ginnifer on the shoulder. “I really do wish you the best.”
“Do want an escort across the inlet?” Zane asked, directing the question at Erik.
“That won’t be necessary,” Erik said. “My wolves will be here in a fortnight. Try not to die before then.”
He placed a hand on Astrid’s back and led her away. As they headed towards the exit, Astrid looked back to see Zane speaking softly to Ginnifer. She watched as her sister put her head against his chest and began to cry.
Astrid turned to face the path ahead. She reminded herself that this was the life Ginnifer had chosen, and at great expense to those who loved her. Astrid couldn’t afford to focus on her sister’s problems; she had enough of her own.
“You and Zane seemed pretty civil,” Astrid said once they were farther down the tunnel. She was pleasantly surprised when Erik answered her.
“We made an alliance.”
Her brows rose. “An alliance? I thought you two were rivals?”
“Misery acquaints a man with strange bedfellows.”
Astrid cracked a grin, unable to keep a straight face. “Do you even know what that means?”
Erik smirked. “No.”
“That sounds like something my sister would say.”
“She seems well,” he remarked.
She grimaced. “Just say it. I’m a complete idiot for coming here.”
Erik said nothing, and her words echoed in the silence, ricocheting off the tunnel walls. In a quiet moment of weakness, she reached out and squeezed Erik’s hand.
“Please don’t go back to ignoring me,” she said. “I really need someone to talk to.”
It embarrassed her to plead with him, but she had nowhere else to turn to. She needed to lean on someone, and Erik was the only one there.
If this isn’t Stockholm’s syndrome, I don’t know what is.
They reached the mouth of the cave. A storm was brewing outside. Wind tossed around the snow that lay on the ground, while fresh flurries fell from the sky. Erik turned to look down at her, his face shadowed in the dim evening light.
“Just because I am not speaking, does not mean I am not listening.”
Astrid was too choked up to answer. Erik pried her hand from his.
“I am going to shift now,” he said.
“Zane said you’re not supposed to shift in his territory,” she said, finding her voice.
Erik cast her a sly look. “If Zane wants to punish me, he’ll have to catch me first.
***
Once they were back on the mainland, Erik headed north towards a mountainous region that was sure to harbor suitable shelter. He didn’t bother looking for Sten and the others, for the same reason he hadn’t spent the night at the Siluit den.
He needed sleep.
During their journey, he’d put off sleeping for as long as he could. He’d rested for a few hours here and there, but had made sure to have his brother wake him before he’d descended into a truly deep sleep. Erik was wiped out, and fortunately for him, the human was accustomed to unusual sleeping patterns. She also slept for longer than the wolves, which meant that there was a good chance he’d be awake before her.
He searched the foothills of the mountains for over an hour, and nearly turned back to return to the Siluit den. He wouldn’t be able to sleep there, but he knew that the human could only withstand the winter storm for so long. He could feel her trembling on his back, and the memory of her pale and near-lifeless body still stuck with him.
As the storm began to pick up, he found a small cavern they could rest in. The opening was too narrow for his wolf form, and he had to shift to slip inside. During the brief interval between shifting and covering himself with his pelt, the icy wind felt like splinters on his body. He was quite tempered against the cold, and so he knew that it would be more than the human could handle. When they got inside, he went to inspect her, but she was already babbling away, a sure sign that she was fine.
“I can’t believe this weather,” she said, rubbing her hands together. “Are winters always this terrible? How do people live up here?”
Erik found a dry corner and laid down, relieved to stretch out his tired limbs. He leaned his head back against the wall and closed his eyes.
“It’s so cold in here. Can we start a fire?”
He didn’t open his eyes, but he knew that if he didn’t answer her, she’d just keep talking. “With what?”
“Fair enough,” she said, coming to sit beside him. “But how are we going to see anything?”
“The only things you need to see are the backs of your eyelids, now go to sleep.”
“I can’t sleep, it’s too cold. I’ll probably die
of hypothermia.”
Erik spread his pelt out so that it covered the both of them. It was wet from snow, but his body was already warming the inside. She sat quietly beside him for a few moments, and then finally gave in and pressed her body against his. Her clothes were worse off than his pelt, and he considered having her take them off, but was too tired to argue with her.
Despite his exhaustion, sleep eluded Erik. Being in such close quarters, with her body melded to his, he felt himself growing hard. Erik refused to indulge his desires, but couldn’t stop his fingers from idly stroking her hair. He could tell from the cadence of her breathing that she wasn’t sleeping either. He sniffed the air, trying to convince his restless wolf that she wasn’t aroused and wouldn’t be receptive to his advances. Instead, he caught a faint whiff of salt.
Tears had a scent that was distinctly different than sweat. It was a cleaner, purer scent, but was usually accompanied by the smell of mucous. Reluctantly, he opened his eyes to look down at her. He could only see the top of her head, and didn’t feel particularly motivated to investigate further. At least, not until a few sleepless moments later.
“Why are you crying?”
“I’m not crying,” she said in an unconvincing voice.
He should have left it at that.
“You were crying back at the Siluit den as well.”
When she’d emerged with her sister, her eyes had been red and puffy. It was only after he mentioned it that he realized how much it had been bothering him.
Why did he care?
“I was sad about having to leave,” she said. “I’m going to miss Ginnifer a lot.”
“Lie.”
“What? I’m not lying,” she said, sounding affronted. “She’s my sister. I’ll probably never see her again. Of course I’ll miss her.”
“Perhaps. But you did not want to stay and you did not smile at her once.”
“Oh, so now you’re the expert on smiling?”
She cast him an annoyed look and he held her gaze. He didn’t think it was light enough for her to see him with her weak human eyesight, yet as always, she seemed to know exactly where his eyes were.
Enslaved by the Alpha (Shifters of Nunavut Book 2) Page 14