by C. E. Case
"No. Don't think so?" She felt guilty for not knowing for sure, but neither kid had asthma, or any kind of attack in the four months she'd been responsible for their little lives.
She didn't know what the judge had been thinking.
"Either of them have regular allergies?"
"Merry's allergic to the cat, but he doesn't take anything for it."
"No Claritin? Benedryl?"
"No."
"You said Beau didn't have a fever?"
"Not one I could feel."
"Okay. See you there."
She hung up and drove, and thinking of Luis, slowed down.
#
By the time they were ten minutes outside of Tarpley, Beau's gasping was audible and constant. Merritt was scribbling. Natalie tried to dissuade him, knowing he would get carsick, but he couldn't sleep with Beau beside him like that, and Natalie stopped playing music. She didn't want to miss any changes in Beau's breathing.
Beau squirmed.
"We're almost there," Natalie said.
"It hurts," Beau said.
"What does?"
"Everything."
A shudder went through her. She would have preferred to pull over to the side of the road and cry, or maybe pass out. She glanced at Beau in the rearview mirror.
He pulled up his shirt. His stomach was covered in hives.
"Well, that sucks," she said.
#
Hank paced by the nurse's station, his cell phone against his ear. "We've got a medical emergency with Meredith Jameison's son. It would be helpful if she were here."
"Can I get authorization from someone who isn't her cousin?" said the voice on the other side of the line. Monica-something.
He handed the phone to Dr. Singh.
"Yes, I'm Dr. Singh." He paused. "The exact diagnosis is still being assessed. Dire? Possibly life-threatening. He's been exposed--Meningitis? Why does everyone think it's meningitis?" Singh handed the phone back to Hank.
"Even if we authorized medical leave, we don't have transport."
"Do you need an armed guard?"
"Let me check the file." Another pause. "Not with Jameison. But we can't just throw her out the gate and have her walk to Tarpley."
"I'll take care of it."
"We won't authorize anything until you call back with a diagnosis."
"It'll take you two hours to get her down here as it is."
"These procedures are in place for a reason, Dr. Wheeler. These women are criminals."
"And almost all of them have children, am I right?"
A sigh came through the phone. "Call me back."
Hank hung up and then called Natalie. "Hey. Do you know anyone in Rocky Mount?"
# #
Chapter Fifty
Natalie pulled the car into parking strip just beyond the emergency entrance. Her heart had been pounding since the gas station and she finally allowed herself a moment of relief.
"Are we going inside?" Beau asked.
"Yes. Merry, I want you to stay in the car."
"But--" Merritt said.
"No buts. Stay. I promise I'll be right out to get you."
Merritt screamed.
Natalie sighed. She unstrapped Beau and took his hand and they walked together toward the entrance.
Merritt banged the window with his fists. But he didn't get out of the car. Natalie didn't dare glance back and provoke him.
Beau concentrated on breathing.
Hank met them inside the door, a syringe case in his hand. "Hi, Nat. Hi, Beau."
"Hi, Uncle Hank," Beau said, raspily.
"It is anaphylaxis?" Natalie asked.
"Sort of. Not what you're thinking. He would have presented while you were still in Charlotte."
"Thank God." Natalie nearly sagged to the floor. Her pressure on Beau's shoulder kept her up. He squirmed.
Hank knelt.
"Is meningitis? Staph? Swine flu? Frog poisoning?"
"Natalie, please."
Natalie clenched her jaw.
Hank knelt and lifted a flashlight with his free hand. "Say ah."
"Ah," Beau said, and then coughed.
"Lift your shirt."
Beau lifted his shirt.
"Okay. We cleared an exam room for you guys. Let's go."
"Wait, Merritt's in the car."
"I'll have Theresa get him."
Natalie nodded and squeezed Beau's hand and they followed Hank through the emergency room to the offices beyond, and into an exam room.
"Beau, I'm going to need you to turn around and take off your pants."
"No." Beau shook his head.
"Stranger danger," Natalie said.
"I'm not a--"
"Well, of course not. Most kidnappings and molestations are by immediate or close family members."
"He's five, for crying out loud. I'm a doctor, not a--"
"Hey, Beau? How about if Uncle Hank leaves, and you and I get you undressed, okay? Just us."
Beau nodded.
"How does he know you're not a--" Hank asked.
"Life is about minimizing risk, not eliminating it. You'll just have to trust me. Out."
"There's a paper gown in the drawer there." Hank stepped outside.
Natalie helped Beau take off his clothes, wincing at the sight of the red bumps all over his body. She helped him with the gown, apologizing when he braced himself against the sting of the scratchy fabric against his raw skin.
"Hank," she called.
Hank came back in. He took out a syringe. "I'm going to give you this."
Beau shook his head.
"And then I'm going to give you good news."
"He'll live?" Natalie said.
"The best news ever."
"How about you give him five bucks?"
Beau nodded. "Give me your lunch money."
"We are going to have to have a talk," Natalie said.
"I'll give you one dollar, and good news, if you turn around for ten seconds. Can you count down from ten?"
"Ten... nine..."
"You can't start until you turn around."
Beau turned around.
"Let's count together," Natalie said. "Ten... nine..."
"Eight..." Beau said.
Hank injected him. "When you get to one, your butt is going to hurt. A lot. And I'll be over there." He dropped the syringe in a hazmat box.
"One. Ow! I hate you, I hate you." Beau pounded at Natalie.
"Oh, sure. And when the rash goes away, he won't even remember this?"
"Why can't he breathe?" Natalie asked. Even Beau's choked sobs were cut off by long, coughing, gasping sessions.
"He's got hives in his throat. And he's swelled up some. That's closing up his throat. And probably making it hurt."
Natalie held Beau's fists down and tried not to cry.
"We'll keep him overnight. Just in case something goes wrong."
"Just in case something goes wrong and he dies?"
"Natalie. Natalie, sit." Hank pointed to a chair.
Natalie sat.
Theresa knocked. "Everyone decent?"
"My butt hurts." Beau said.
Merritt slipped into the room. "You look like a leopard."
"What's the good news?" Natalie asked.
Beau glanced up.
Hank sat down in the chair next to Natalie and put his arm around her shoulders. "The good news is, boys, your mommy is coming to see you."
Natalie and Beau burst into tears.
#
Meredith apprehensively followed Ida out to the gate. She'd changed into slacks, and heard only Beau was sick. A car was waiting, but she couldn't see who was inside. "Police escort?"
"You're minimum security. Report back within 24 hours."
"Okay..."
She'd been watching Cash Cab with fifty of the other inmates, crowded in the mess hall, waiting for dinner to be served. Robin and Burdette knew most of the answers between them. She hadn't known a thing.
Since th
e rabies scare she'd become more involved in prison life. The inmates came to her when they wouldn't go to the doctors. People had been seeking her out in the chapel, so she avoided the chapel, leaving Siba to pray alone. She missed those nights of quiet.
But God hadn't been so absent. Things had gotten easier lately. Warmer.
She got into the passenger side.
Erica smiled at her. "Hi, Merry."
"Erica? You're--" she tried to come up with an explanation.
"Driving you to Tarpley. Yup. Right on down 95."
"For a story?"
"Just as a favor."
Meredith nodded. A favor to Natalie. Erica was gorgeous--even now in the fading light--and sophisticated. Smart. And she liked Natalie, and Natalie liked her. Meredith leaned back. "Thank you," she said.
"No problem."
"Your chance to see Natalie again?" She held her breath.
"I love that woman," Erica said, laughing. "But don't you worry, Merry. I can't give her what she wants."
"What's that?"
"You to come home to every night."
Meredith closed her eyes.
Erica put the car in drive. Only when the smooth, constant speed of the highway reverberated did Meredith say, "I can't give her that either."
#
Erica put the car in park. Meredith tried to leap out of the car, nearly suffocating herself with her seat belt. She unclasped it.
Erica laughed at her.
"Why don't you stay at my place tonight? It's too late to drive home."
"Are you kidding me? No way. I'll be fine."
Meredith gazed at the sky.
"I want to go home and sleep in my own bed, Merry. Have Natalie drive you back tomorrow."
Meredith quivered. "Yeah, all right."
Erica gave a little wave.
Meredith marched toward the hospital. The doors slid open, then closed behind her. She was free again. And alone. Her hands shook. But this was territory she knew. She headed to the nurse's station.
"Merry!"
She turned and Colleen rushed toward her. "How's Beau?" she asked as Colleen hugged her.
"He's all right. He's on the third floor. Let me take you." Colleen took her hand. "How the hell are you, Merry? You look good. I didn't think--" she blushed as they got onto the elevator.
"Want to see my prison tats?"
Colleen's eyes widened.
"I'm just kidding."
Colleen exhaled.
"You can't see them."
"Who you been talking to, girl?"
Meredith felt pinpricks of heat on her cheeks. The elevator opened. Colleen pulled her to the fourth room on the left. The children's ward. And there was her boy, small and covered in angry red welts. She cried out.
Merritt, who'd been curled up on Natalie's lap, scrambled up. "Mommy!"
Meredith hugged him, shuddering with the sensation of having him in her arms again, out where they were free. No prison reception room. She kept her gaze on Beau.
"He's all right," Natalie said.
"That's what Colleen said."
Colleen winked at them and then left, closing the door.
Natalie reached to hug her, but Meredith moved toward the bed.
"It's just an allergic reaction. Probably to something he ate, since it was in his throat," Natalie said.
"How did it happen?"
"We were at Discovery Place. I don't know. There’s some freeze-dried ice cream."
"It was gross," Merritt said.
"You don't know? You were supposed to be watching them."
"I was." Natalie took a step back. "I was watching them."
"And you let Beau poison himself?"
"Where were you?"
"You know where I was."
"I was doing the best I can."
"Taking them all the way to another city? What were you thinking?"
"Merry."
"And then driving them back here? Why didn't you take them to the hospital there? You're irresponsible, Nat, and--"
Merritt's fingers dug into Meredith's hip. "Don't yell at Natalie, Mommy."
Meredith exhaled.
Natalie, tears in her eyes, brushed past them. "I'll leave you some time to be alone with your boys."
"Where are you going? We're not finished."
"I'm finished. I'm going to my car."
Merritt began to cry.
Natalie slammed the door.
Beau woke up. "Mommy?"
Meredith took the last step to the bed and wrapped herself around Beau. "How do you feel?"
"I'm okay."
Meredith hugged him close. "I love you so much."
"I love you too, Mommy. Where's Nat?"
Meredith glanced over her shoulder.
"Where's Merritt?" Beau asked.
# #
Chapter Fifty-One
Natalie curled into herself in the passenger seat of the station wagon, convulsing with sobs. She couldn't even get into the back seat with the booster seats there. She had two lives in her hands, and she had almost lost one of them.
A knock came at the window.
She glanced up. Merritt peered over the sill. She opened the door.
"Are you by yourself?" she asked.
Merritt nodded.
"Go to the driver's side."
He grinned and walked around the car and got in, nearly short enough to stand in the seat.
She brushed at her cheeks. Having him there was calming. "You okay, Merry?"
He nodded. "Are you?"
"I think so." She offered her hand.
He took it. "Is Beau going to be okay?"
"Yes."
"Will I get it?"
"What?"
"The spots. Will I have those?"
"No, I don't think so. That's a special Beau disease."
Merritt grinned.
"Merry, tell me how Beau's been doing at school."
#
Meredith hesitated before knocking on the window. Natalie and Merritt were dozing with the seats back. She went around to the driver's side and knocked, and then opened the door. Merritt groggily sat up.
"Hi, Merry. Colleen's going to take you back to Beau's room, all right? And stay with you."
Merritt turned to Natalie.
"I'm going to talk to Natalie for a while, okay?"
"She was crying."
"I know."
"She cries a lot."
Natalie had her eyes closed, but she was still and tense. Listening. Meredith helped Merritt out of the car. Colleen took his hand. Meredith slipped into the car and shut the door.
Natalie rolled onto her side and opened one eye. Her cheeks were puffy. Her nose ran.
"I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have said those things," Meredith said.
"You were right." Natalie rolled back onto her back, just when Meredith wanted to touch her.
"No, I wasn't. I was wrong. I was just so scared. When they came and got me and said there was an emergency, I had to get down to the hospital or--I didn't know what was going on. I only knew I was really far away, and I felt so helpless. Natalie, I was terrified."
"When you feel that way you should come to me, not yell at me."
"I'm coming to you now. Natalie, please. I'm still scared."
Natalie shifted, meeting her gaze. "How do you think I feel?"
Meredith closed her eyes. She wrung her hands. She didn't want to know how Natalie felt, how awful it must be, day in and day out. "Natalie--"
"Every time they turn us away from the prison on visiting day. Every time I don't get a letter. You could be in there, hurt, or, I don't know. I hate not knowing."
Tears dripped onto Meredith's hands. "I'm sorry."
Since they were in this raw place, their defenses weakened, their pain already exposed, Natalie offered up the rest. "I don't know how much longer I can do this."
"Are you unhappy?"
"It's not--I just don't know why I'm doing this. It's endless. It feels, I don't kno
w."
"You don't love my children."
Natalie met her eyes. "I don't mind taking them to school, or helping them with their homework, or putting them to bed, or staying all night at the hospital holding their hands. I do love them, Merry. As much as I love you. But everything is a reminder of what I don't have, instead of what I do. It's just so empty. Even loving them is empty."
Meredith cupped her cheek, gratified when Natalie didn't flinch away.
"I need you," Meredith said.
"I'm not doing a very good job."
"Yes, you are. Natalie, I'm scared of everything. You're the only thing I'm not scared of."
"Even if I--"
"Even if you leave. If you want to. I trust you, Natalie."
Natalie covered Meredith's hand. "You're only saying that because you don't have any other options."
"I have plenty. Foster care. Uncle Hank. Vince's parents. I choose you."
"I choose you. I wish you were here to choose."
"It won't be long, my love," Meredith said.
Natalie closed her eyes with Meredith's fingers stroking her face.
#
Despite the hospital noises, the family managed to sleep until six. Meredith curled around Beau and Natalie and Merritt slept in the second bed. Then the morning shift came through and everyone wanted to see Meredith. She was dragged out into the main lobby and hugged and pawed while Natalie tried to get the cranky children moving.
Theresa brought Doctor Radoni in. Beau was less pink. "Took the liberty," he said to Natalie, "Of filling your prednisone prescription. The pills are pretty big. Can he swallow them?"
"Can we cut them in half?"
"Sure. Three times a day, so you'll have to talk to the school nurse."
"I will."
"We can leave?" Beau asked.
"We sure can. We have to take Merritt to school."
Merritt frowned.
"I want to go to school too," Beau said.
"Oh, Beau."
"He'll be all right," Radoni said.
"Don't you want to spend time with your mommy?"
"I want to do both."
Radoni handed Natalie the prescription bag and slipped out. He paused at the doorway. "Oh, one more thing. Dr. Wheeler asked Theresa to set up an appointment for all three of you in about three weeks, when the prednisone's worn off. For a meningitis vaccination. Said he was tired of hearing about it."
Natalie grinned.
"More shots," Beau said.
"That's right. Come on. Let's get Merry and go."
#
Meredith slid into the booth at Hardee's. Beau followed. She slung an arm around his shoulder. "What time is it?"