She drew herself up, barely able to keep a straight face. "I can't imagine what you're talking about."
"Oh, you can imagine plenty, I'd wager." Arms folded across his powerful chest, he strolled over and stood before her. "The six weeks are nearly up, you know. After that, I'm available anytime. Happy to be of service."
"In your dreams, hombre. Remember our agreement."
"I remember." His gaze was lit with a hunger that shook her. "But I've also seen the way you look at me."
She swallowed heavily.
Kneeling down, he leaned over and brushed his lips across hers. Just a whisper of a touch, light as the breeze soughing through the blossoms overhead. She shivered.
"I still want you," he said, his voice low and sultry. She closed her eyes, expecting his lips to come crashing down on hers. When they didn't, she swayed imperceptibly toward him. He smelled of fresh grass and oil and grapes and Cole. She breathed him in, savoring his nearness.
"You want me," he murmured.
The words tumbled softly over her hair and into her ears. She could feel his hot breath slide down the front of her dress, curling between her swollen breasts. His finger traced a lazy path along her jaw. She realized she was trembling like a leaf.
"Open your eyes, Rini."
She obeyed, looking up into the liquid midnight of his. "Admit it to yourself, if not to me." Again he brushed his velvet lips over hers, tenderly, longingly. Seductively. When he reached the corner of her mouth he increased the pressure just a shade, pressing a wisp of a kiss into her imagination. He whispered, "You want me, Fire Eyes."
* * *
You want me, Fire Eyes.
Rini still shivered at the memory of her husband whispering those words seductively in her ear over two weeks ago.
She leaned heavily against the bathroom sink and contemplated her face in the mirror. Panic. That's what she saw. Pure, unadulterated terror.
It had been nearly six weeks since Chance's birth.
Cole had been a model of decorum, but she could see impatience in his eyes now, every time he looked at her. He was counting the days just as diligently as she was. But for an entirely different reason.
What would she do?
"Rini! Have you fallen in or what?" Alexa's voice held mostly pique and only the barest hint of concern.
Rini opened the powder room door and smiled sheepishly. "Sorry."
"What is with you, anyway? You've been acting weird all afternoon, and I know it's not the wine. You've hardly touched yours."
Oh, she'd touched it, just enough to blurt out in response, "It's Cole. He wants sex."
Alexa's brow rose, and she smiled mischievously. "Imagine that. When does the doctor say it's okay?"
Rini let out an exasperated breath and led Alexa back to the living room. "No, you don't understand."
"So, tell me." Her sister flopped down on the sofa. Reluctant to talk, but knowing she had to confide in someone or go nuts, Rini leaned back against the cool brick of the fireplace. "We haven't had sex since Chance was—"
"Born. Right. I understand that's standard procedure."
"No. Since Chance was conceived."
"What?" Alexa's eyes were the size of dinner plates. "But you're married! Why on earth not?"
"And now I'm afraid I'm going to give in to him, and I don't know what to do."
"Give in?" Alexa refilled her wineglass and sank back against the sofa, taking a long swallow. "Rini," she said in a deadly calm voice. "Honey. Are you out of your mind?"
"I know I should stick to my principles, but he's just so damned...sexy."
"Principles?" Alexa groaned, speaking to the floor lamp across room. "She's married to the hunk of the western world, but she doesn't let him touch her."
Rini looked up sharply. She'd noticed her sister's slow thaw toward Cole since the baby's birth, but until now, Alexa had never actually said anything to confirm her change of heart. "Since when are you on his side?"
Alexa made a face. "I know I thought he was scum-eating slime when I first met him, but I'm not too proud to admit I was wrong." She met Rini's gaze directly. "I've seen how he treats you. He's a guy most women would kill to have. He's smart, good-looking, kind, generous, and he changes diapers."
"He had Obsession perfume on his shirt when he came home last week."
Alexa looked up. Rini knew exactly what she was thinking, but, to her credit, she didn't say it. Since discovering David's chronic infidelities, Rini was prone to jealousy and suspicion at the least provocation. With David it had been deserved. With Cole, her jealousy had cost her months of suffering, at the very least, and had nearly cost her the baby's father and her future happiness.
"Attorneys' clients have been known to wear perfume now and then," Alexa said comfortingly.
Rini fiddled with a fingernail, a stubborn pout on her lips. "Anyway. He doesn't love me."
"Oh, sweetie. Give him a chance."
She couldn't even smile at the unintended pun. "Alexa, I have!" Tears of frustration spilled over her eyelashes. "I've tried everything. I've cooked his favorite meals, kept the house spotless, decorated it the way he likes. I even typed his stupid papers when Charlie was out sick."
Alexa gave her a sympathetic look. "Never worked with Mother, either, did it?"
Rini scowled into her lap.
"Maybe Cole doesn't want a housekeeper or a secretary. Maybe he wants a wife. A companion… Sex."
Rini looked up and wiped her eyes determinedly. "I want him to love me first."
Her sister stretched out her arms to her. "Maybe he does. Maybe he just has a hard time saying it."
Rini shook her head and accepted a hug as she sat down. "He tells Chance every day."
Alexa gave her an understanding look. "I know how important this is to you. But whether or not he loves you, he's trying his damnedest to do right by you."
"I know he is, Alexa. But it's just not enough. I want his love, too. I need him to love me."
* * *
Tanya was spending the weekend with her family at Rincon, and she asked Cole and Rini to bring the baby and come down for a neighborhood barbecue. After checking with T, Cole called up Jeff and invited him, too. They'd talked several times on the phone, but had never met face-to-face. It was long past time. Since Jeff lived down that way, they arranged to meet at Tanya's.
On Saturday morning, Cole loaded the car seat and diaper bag into the truck and settled behind the wheel, with Rini close beside him and Chance's car seat buckled next to her.
He shot her a wink and shifted into reverse, deliberately sliding the stick shift under her skirt. She quickly scooted her knees to the side and clamped them together. Chuckling, he gave her an evil grin.
She was so teasable, and he loved doing it. From the first moment he'd laid eyes on her, he'd been hopelessly attracted to her innocent sensuality. Her guileless fluster at his sexual innuendos never ceased to delight him, inflaming him to taut arousal. He couldn't wait to get her into his bed, naked and purring.
He squirmed in his seat, his hip brushing hers as he tried to make more room in his suddenly tight jeans. Her gaze dropped, landing squarely on the obvious swollen ridge of his sex.
"Forget it, sweetness," he quipped. "A couple more days and you can have your wicked way with me. But until then, it's no dice. Doctor's orders."
Her mouth quirked in a failed attempt at looking stern. He imagined how it would taste if he just leaned over and covered that luscious mouth with his. The tip of her tongue brushed the succulent swell of her lower lip. He looked up into her pretty blue fire eyes, watching them lower shyly to his lips. He steeled himself against the urge to kiss her, nearly losing it when the truck hit the bottom of the driveway and her curves jostled softly against his side.
He jammed the truck into gear and took off with a lurch. Could it be Rini was reconsidering their agreement?
It was a long drive to Rincon, nearly two and a half hours, even clipping along the inland route and avoidi
ng the beach crowds. The California freeways were fast and efficient that morning. Colorful magenta ice plant and yellow daisies grew along the sloping freeway cuts, in riotous spring bloom.
Cole rolled down his window, cranked up a slow, mellow, jazz album on the iPod, and stretched out his right arm along the seat back. With his black truck freshly waxed, his woman nestled by his side, and the smell of talcum powder wafting over from his slumbering baby boy, Cole figured life couldn't get much better than this.
Rini's head dropped gently against his shoulder and he circled his arm around her, pulling her close as she fell into an untroubled sleep. Well, he mused, maybe life could get a little better. But he was working on that.
He glanced over at her and Chance—his family. He'd found a peace and contentment during the past weeks that he would never have imagined possible. All because of this woman. He couldn't conceive of life without her anymore. Even without sex, Rini had shown him more love and devotion than any lover had even come close to giving him.
In a hot rush of panic he realized just how much she had come to mean to him, how much he needed her. Every day and in every way. He couldn't take it if she left him.
He hoped like hell if he could get Rini to make love with him, he could bind her to him forever. That had to be the key. Mark her as his, only his, again and again. Make her dependent upon his touch, fill her body with a need so potent she couldn't sleep at night if he hadn't relieved it first. Only him. He would give her such pleasure she'd never, ever think of leaving him.
She stirred at his shoulder, rubbing her cheek against the soft nap of his shirt, and instinctively he moved his hand to caress her hair and neck.
What would it be like if he could really open his heart and allow himself to love her? The thought terrified him, but he had made a vow to try. He owed her that much.
Irrational fear crawled up his spine. She had abandoned him once. And she'd barred him from her bed. How could he trust her with his heart? Still, he was determined to face his demons. For her.
As he held her tight against his side, he told himself he could surely trust her now. She had married him and had thrown herself into caring for him and the baby without a backward glance. He knew she loved Chance with all her heart, and on their wedding night she'd hinted that she loved him, too.
He pulled into Tanya's driveway filled with new resolve. He had to make Rini need him. Just him.
Only then would he feel safe enough to love her.
Chapter Fourteen
When Cole swung open the wooden screen door to his cousin's house, grabbed Rini's hand and walked in carrying Chance, the entire Proudhomme clan descended like locusts.
"They're here!"
Rini's pulse zipped in panic. She hadn't seen so many people of varying sizes, shapes, and ages crammed into that small a space since the high school graduation party her father had thrown for her. If Cole hadn't had such a firm grip on her hand she would have turned tail and run like hell.
She could feel her palm grow sweaty against his. Would they like her? Would they ignore her? Would they make ugly comments behind her back?
"Cole! Rini! You made it!" Tanya burst from a door on the other side of the living room and elbowed her way through the throng, throwing her arms around Rini in a hug. "Perfect timing! We just lit up the grills. How are you? Everyone, this is Cole's wife, Rini. And this little kihaat"—she swept the baby from Cole's arms before he could protest—"is their son, Chance."
Instantly, Rini was surrounded. Cousins, nephews, and neighbors pressed in to clasp her hand, yelling hellos and congratulations over the din. Their friendliness was overwhelming, and she felt her fear and hesitation fall away like a spent cocoon.
Glancing up, she saw Cole gauging her reaction as he was also besieged by well-wishers. She grinned. Obviously pleased with that, he winked, then was swallowed up in a swarm of pretty young women.
Rini fought an instinctive, sickening surge of jealousy and nightmare memories. Suddenly, it was like a horrible rerun. Giggling, the women crowded close to Cole and whispered in his ear, all the while casting furtive glances at her.
Unable to watch, she swallowed heavily and turned her back on them. Damn it, anyway!
She knew she was being irrational. He'd vowed to be faithful, and she believed him, in spite of the voice inside asking what reason had she given him to want to be true to her.
Who could blame the girls for flirting? A woman would have to be dead not to react to Cole's tempting virility. Rini tried not to think about the strange perfume she had smelled on his shirt twice now while doing laundry. Each time she'd firmly dismissed it, telling herself it had been a client or another lawyer he'd brushed up against. But seeing him now, surrounded by women, the old fears flared back to life.
She frowned as he was dragged by the coquettes out into the backyard, where the men were tending the grills and playing soccer. By the time he joined the game they had stripped him of the diaper bag, as well as his shirt, and had formed a cheering squad along the sidelines.
"This is his home," an old woman said, following Rini's troubled gaze out the back window. "It is good that he found us. Good that he brings his family now."
Rini pulled herself together and looked at the woman. "He found you?"
She smiled, showing a full set of large, sturdy teeth. "He was one stubborn chacho. He didn't give up till the agency told him where he came from."
"Yes, he told me he was adopted."
The woman nodded slowly. "One day he will heal." Her wise old eyes searched the room and found Chance, who was being passed around from cooing grandmother to tickling aunt. "Perhaps he has already."
Rini studied the wrinkled face for a moment, wondering what relation, if any, she now had to the woman behind it. Could this be Chance's biological grandmother or great-grandmother? She didn't dare ask, for fear of overstepping some unknown boundary. If the woman wanted her to know, she would have said something.
But there was one thing she would risk asking. "I know Tanya is Cole's real cousin, and her parents are his biological aunt and uncle. But what about his mother and father? What happened to them?"
With a sad expression the old woman looked away, then rose. "I think they could use our help in the kitchen, hija." She shuffled toward the back of the house.
The back door swung open, and Cole strode into the room, grinning, his arm slung around another man. She checked behind him and sighed with relief. No women.
"Rini!" Cole beckoned her. "You remember my brother, Billy."
"Of course. You were at the wedding. How are you?"
"Came to see my nephew! Where is that little rascal?"
Suddenly, there was a commotion at the front door. Someone was admitted to the house amid a murmur of exclamations.
"That must be Jeff," Cole said with a quick glance at Rini. "The kid I told you about—the one I'm helping to find his father."
Rini nodded. She thought it was great that he was helping the boy. Before knowing Cole, she'd had no idea how traumatic it could be for a child who belonged to a culture obviously different from the one in which he was raised. From the stories he told of how lost Jeff felt, she knew it was important that Cole ease this child's way back to his own culture.
The exclamations became louder as Cole and Billy pressed into the crowd surrounding the new arrival.
"Oh, my God!" Cole and Billy said in unison, catching sight of the boy at exactly the same time. Cole turned and stared incredulously at his brother.
Curious, Rini glanced down the path that had parted in front of them. "He looks just like Billy!" she murmured in astonishment. An uneasy hush settled over the group.
Cole recovered and came forward, extending his hand. "You must be Jeff. Welcome. I'm Cole."
The boy smiled sheepishly, and mumbled a greeting, but his eyes kept darting to Billy.
Cole stepped aside. His smile was fixed in place, but Rini could tell he was furious beneath the calm façade. "Jeff, this is my
brother, Billy." He looked his brother directly in the eye. "Jeff's mother is Lindsay Walker."
Billy blanched, and looked from Cole to Jeff and back. "Who, uh—" He dragged a hand across his mouth. "He yours, bro?"
Rini gasped, her own hand flying to her mouth.
"No." Cole's growled answer was instant and certain. She sagged with relief, then caught sight of Jeff and chastised herself. The poor kid looked like he wanted nothing more than to run out the door. Or fly into Billy's arms.
Cole moved to the boy's side and put a supportive hand on his shoulder, facing his brother. "So, nupeet, were you seeing Lindsay about fifteen years ago? You know, about the time I married her?"
Rini's brows shot up of their own volition. That Lindsay? His ex-wife's son! Was that why Cole was so upset?
The crowd stirred, and a murmur rose and fell as Billy put up his hands in a defensive gesture. "Cole, it wasn't like that at all. You were long gone, off to college. Do the math, big brother."
Cole took a deep breath and squeezed Jeff's shoulder. "Could this boy be your son?"
Billy looked as though he would fall over in a stiff breeze. He nodded. "I suppose he could. I had no idea," he added in a whisper.
Jeff's face became a jumble of emotion. He shuffled from one foot to the other and stuck his hands in his pockets. "Cool," he croaked out, sounding anything but.
Rini and everyone else in the room smiled. Suddenly, Billy had his arms around Jeff, and they were both laughing and hugging, trying valiantly to hold back tears.
Grinning, Cole propelled them toward the back door. "Bro, I think we've got a few things to discuss. In private." He glanced back at her. "Will you be okay for a few minutes, honey?"
Still smiling, she nodded. "Go ahead. I'll be helping in the kitchen."
She joined the whirl of gossip and activity in the kitchen, preparing platters of spicy chicken, pots of aromatic beans, corn on the cob, salsa, and tortillas, happy to have someone else be the center of speculation for a change.
But she couldn't miss the occasional whispered exchange among the women, usually accompanied by a furtive glance her way. It started her wondering why Cole had failed to mention to her that Jeff was his ex-wife's son. Was there something more to this Lindsay than he was telling her?
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