"I know Colton Lonetree. If he wanted someone else, he'd divorce you first."
Rini made a deprecating noise. "Sure he would."
"He loves you, Rin."
She sighed again. "You're wrong. He doesn't love me."
"Bull."
"Then why does he refuse to say it? Why hasn't he even called me?"
"'Because he's a man. In other words, a flaming idiot."
"And what about the woman at the café?" she persisted, attempting to ignore Tanya's sarcasm despite the smile she felt tugging at her lips. "You know, the one he was kissing?"
"I'm sure there's a reasonable explanation, if you'd just ask him."
She threw up her hands in exasperation because, God help her, she had reached the same conclusion.
Tanya stopped in the middle of the dusty parking area and took her arm. "Rini, if he told you he loved you, and you knew he meant it, would you go back to him?"
Rini groaned, discouraged again. "In a hot minute. But that's not going to happen. I gave him opening after opening, and he never took them. Even if this woman turns out to be his long-lost sister"—she shook her head morosely—"he doesn't love me, Tani. Without real love the attraction will eventually fade, and I'll be left with a husband who doesn't love me and no longer desires me. He'll be unhappy, and he'll find fault with everything about me."
"It sounds like you've had personal experience with that."
"I have. And it would kill me to have to face the day Cole turned into another David. I've already lived through that once. I love him more than I can say, but I can't put myself through it again. I just have to accept reality and try to move on."
"I'm telling you, he loves you, Rini. If he isn't down here on his knees by the weekend I'll eat my hat."
"You don't wear a hat," Rini reminded her wryly. "Wanna come with me to pick up Chance?" she asked, putting an end to the depressing conversation.
Tanya checked her watch. "Sorry. I promised Mom I'd bring her some applesauce before dinner. Who've you got watching him?"
"Lanie Padilla. She's been a godsend. I'm so—"
She halted. Tanya was staring at her slack-jawed, her face as pale as Rini's own. "What is it?" Rini grew alarmed. "Is there something wrong with her?"
"No! No, not at all." Tanya seemed to recover and turned to her car. "Aunt Lanie's terrific. I'm just surprised. Does, um, Cole know yet?"
Rini lifted her chin. "Everyone at Rincon must know by now. I expect he's heard through the grapevine."
Unlocking the door, Tanya mumbled, "I seriously doubt it."
Rini got the distinct feeling there was something going on that everyone knew about except her. It made her very nervous. "Wha—"
"Listen, Rini." Tanya cut her off, climbing into the car. "Mom's waiting for that applesauce, but she wanted me to stop by and ask you and Chance to dinner. Come on over after you get him, okay? We can talk more then."
Rini nodded, waving to Tanya as she roared out of the parking lot.
* * *
"Heard you were at Rincon yesterday." Cole sank into one of the lumpy chairs in front of Tanya's desk at her office at the Southern California Native American Center.
"Yeah. I took Mom some homemade applesauce, and that photo of Charlie's I'd promised to frame for her." She looked at him expectantly.
Cole wasn't about to beg for information. Or demand to know if she'd seen Rini. Whether she'd asked about him…
He straightened. "Thanks for lending us the room here at the Center."
Jeff had called him and asked if they could talk over some of the things he was going through. Cole had just come from that meeting and was feeling a bit vulnerable. The boy reminded him way too much of himself at that age.
Tanya lifted a brow, but didn't comment on his obvious evasion. "How'd it go?"
How could Cole pretend to counsel someone else, when he still hadn't faced his own demons after all these years? He sighed. "He's a good kid, just real angry."
Tanya smirked. "Remind you of anyone you know?"
"Ha ha ha." He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Jeff and Lindsay have apparently been talking every day. He says her dad seems to be coming around a little."
"That's good. Hard to believe a father would consider disowning his own daughter over something like this nowadays."
Cole pursed his lips. "Not so hard. Some parents don't give a damn. Some care too much."
"And which category do you fall into?"
He scowled. "Not funny, T."
Licking a finger, his cousin rubbed a coffee stain off her pristine desk. "Yeah, what the hell. You can always get to know Chance when he's thirteen."
Cole shot out of the chair. "Hey!" She was deliberately baiting him.
"Well?" she demanded, suddenly belligerent. "Just what is it going to take before you realize what a class-A fool you are?"
"I'm outta here. I don't need this from you, too." He grabbed his briefcase.
"That's right. Run away from it."
"Dammit, Tanya! I'm not the one who left! And I just spent the entire damn morning listening to Mom's sterling opinion of me, so don't you start, too, okay?" He had managed to control his temper with his mom, but he sure as hell wasn't going to put up with any crap from his own cousin, best friend or no.
"You talk to Rini yet?"
He set his jaw, determined not to be taken in by any of Tanya's inevitable arguments—and ruthlessly throttled the flutter in his heart at the mere sound of Rini's name. "I have nothing to say to her."
Tanya snorted. "Yeah. That was painfully obvious to everyone from the beginning. I'm just amazed she put up with your tight-lipped, wounded warrior, frikkin' martyr act for as long as she did."
He slammed the briefcase to the floor, glaring at her. "What the hell's that supposed to mean?"
She surged to her feet and drew herself up to her full height, braced her hands on the desk and leaned right into his face. "It means if just once in your wretched life you'd thought of someone else's feelings, if you'd just once opened that goddamn mouth of yours and said 'I love you,' she'd still be with you, you fucking moron! That's what it's supposed to mean!"
He ground his teeth. "You're on drugs, chica. Rini used me to get her degree, then took off. End of story."
"Well, isn't that convenient," Tanya mocked. "Spared once again from the dreadful ordeal of loving someone."
He grabbed his tie and straightened it, seeking its soothing texture. "That was a cheap shot, T. Especially coming from you."
She dropped abruptly into her chair, looking properly chastised. "Yeah, well. It's not like I have anyone crying himself to sleep over me." Her statement was razor sharp, but the look in her eyes was sympathetic.
The wind knocked out of his sails, Cole fell back into the seat, propping his arms on his knees. "Hell, T, I miss Chance a lot more than he misses me," he said, deliberately misinterpreting her words. "I miss him like mad. And believe me, I'm going to fight—"
"I'm not talking about Chance, and you know it."
He looked up, half wanting her to convince him Rini was miserable down at Rincon. "She's the one who bailed. If she's crying, don't blame me."
"No, not you. Never you." Tanya sighed deeply. "Cole, all she wants is three little words. Is that so much to ask? You love her. You know you do."
He lifted his chin. "It doesn't matter how I feel. I can't trust her. She took my son and left me."
"And why do you think she did that?"
He shrugged uncomfortably, twisting his tie between his fingers. "Does she need a reason? It's what always happens."
Tanya rolled her eyes skyward. "Oh, puh-leeze. Not that old tune again. Listen to yourself! Rini just wants to be loved by the man she married. Is that so hard to understand?"
He looked at his cousin, not quite believing what she was telling him. But knowing he had to find out. In the past few days he'd rediscovered what his life was like without Rini in it. It wasn't worth living.
"You really think it's that simpl
e?" he asked, hope stealing through him. "That she'll come back if I tell her I love her?"
Tanya smiled. "I know it is. That and a good explanation of why you were kissing some woman in a café the day she left."
Cole's jaw dropped nearly to his knees. "Kissing—? You've got to be— That was Lindsay, and we were just talking. Well, mostly," he added with a prick of guilt. Damn.
"You were kissing Lindsay?" Tanya looked scandalized.
"Hell, no. It was just a sympathy peck. Her dad is about to disown her over Jeff. You know damn well there's no way in hell—"
Tanya held up a hand. "Don't tell me, Cole. Tell Rini."
There was a knock on the door and the receptionist stuck her head in. "Reeve Southwell to see you, T."
"Thanks, Lilly. Show him in." Tanya rose and looped her arm through Cole's as they turned toward the door. "I want you down at Rincon by the weekend, nuyukssum. No excuses."
"You're asking a lot of me, T."
"No more than you can handle. It's time to move on with your life. Put the past well and truly behind you, and look ahead. I know you can do it."
He kissed her on the cheek. "I'll think about it, my cousin."
Chapter Seventeen
Later that afternoon Cole was still thinking about what Tanya had said. He stretched out in his easy chair and bit into his bologna sandwich. It was the third time in a row he'd had that same pitiful dinner entrée after skipping lunch. He told himself he was too busy to make full hot meals like Rini always did, but he knew that was a crock. It was only three in the afternoon and he had nothing to do but mope. He simply had no appetite for anything she hadn't cooked.
Setting his beer on the ottoman, he picked up a small stack of stuff sitting there. One-handed, he sifted through the credit cards, receipts and checkbook Rini had left scattered on the kitchen table when she'd fled. He spent a long time contemplating each one. Staring at the name embossed on them.
Katarina Lonetree.
It sounded melodic and right. Just like a love song.
He shuffled the pile, picking up a picture he'd fished out of his desk drawer the day she'd left. The photo showed them at their wedding reception at Alexa and Brad's, having been snapped just at the moment he'd suggested they take their leave. The look on her face was enough to bring a grown man to his knees.
Insecurity, apprehension, even fear were all there in her eyes. But underlying everything was a look of pure adoration. It was obvious she thought the sun rose and set in the man she was looking at. Him—Colton Ace-Jerk Lonetree.
How could he have missed seeing that look in her eyes all this time? Was Tanya right? Had he waited and waited for a commitment from her when all it would have taken to ensure a lifetime of happiness was a commitment from himself? He closed his eyes and groaned out loud, holding the picture to his chest. Oh, Rini, forgive me, babe. What a fool I've been.
"Cole?"
Startled, he jerked his eyes open. "Rini?" He leaped up from the chair, scattering all but the picture he had clutched in his fist. "Oh. Alexa." Disappointment crushed him.
"Sorry, Cole. Just me. You didn't hear my knock."
He smiled bleakly and gave her a sincere hug. Since the day of Chance's birth, Alexa had, for some reason, turned into his staunchest supporter. He wasn't quite sure what the test had been, but he was glad he'd passed. "A sight for sore eyes. What brings you to this sorry house?"
"The front door was open. I wasn't sure you'd let me in…"
"Of course I would. Want a beer?"
"No thanks. My stomach's been a bit jumpy since Rini—" Spotting the picture in his hand, her mouth curved up. She gestured to it. "Is this a good sign? Last I heard, you still hadn't spoken."
He led her to the couch and perched beside her. "I want her back, Alexa. I love her. Tanya has the crazy notion I'd never have lost her if I'd told her that."
Alexa let out a breath and sank back into the cushions, regarding him. "That about sums it up."
"Why the hell didn't you tell me this before?" He scrubbed his face with his hands. He was whining. He couldn't believe it.
She grinned. "None of my business. Besides, I figured you'd have plenty of time to come to your senses. Who'd ever guess Rini would have the strength to leave as soon as she did? It took two years with David."
"Just my luck she changed."
Alexa laid a hand on his arm. "Yes. Your luck, and your doing. You're good for her, Cole. She blossomed with you. Now, go get her back before she takes root somewhere else."
Suddenly, he had an awful, terrible thought. "How does she like her new job?"
"Loves it. She can't stop talking about how great Dr. Redcloud is and—" Alexa stopped in midsentence, her mouth forming an O when she darted a glance at his crestfallen face. "But I'm sure there are plenty of nursing jobs up here she'll like just as much."
"Yeah. Sure." He stood, jamming his hands in his pockets. Maybe there was some flaw in her new routine he could use to convince her the job wasn't so great. That she'd be better off with him—just in case his declaration of love was too little, too late. "Where's Chance while she's at work?"
Alexa brightened. "She found a wonderful woman who loves taking care of him. She lives just a couple of blocks from the Health Service. I sure hope I'll find someone as reliable as Mrs. Padilla when—"
He jerked to attention. "Who?"
"Her name is Lanie Padilla. She's a treas—"
His jaw clamped and his eyes narrowed. "She's got that woman watching my baby?"
Alexa nodded uncertainly. " What's wrong? Oh, God, is she an ax murderer or something?"
"Worse." No way. No. Fucking. Way. He grabbed his jacket and keys and stormed out. "Lock the door when you leave, Alexa," he shouted over his shoulder.
Not a chance that woman was getting her hands on his son. Not after what she'd done to her own.
* * *
Smiling, Rini hung back in the doorway for a moment and watched Mrs. Padilla and Chance, who were playing on a satiny quilt spread on her living room floor. The woman was remarkable. Rini thanked God every day for sending her.
Chance spotted her standing there and squealed, kicking his plump little legs and arms in the air, a silly toothless grin smeared across his face.
"Hey there, little tiger," she cooed, stepping forward and scooping him up, squeezing him to her. "Did you miss your mommy?"
He gurgled in response.
"He hardly had time," Mrs. Padilla said, chuckling. "Between his two naps and you spending your entire lunch hour here with him."
"But Mommy misses her baby boy so much," she said in baby talk, tickling his tummy. Chance nuzzled her breast and she laughed. "Yeah, yeah. I know what you missed."
"Would you like to sit down and feed him before you go? We can chat."
"Just for a few minutes, thanks, Mrs. Padilla. That would be nice."
"Please, call me Lanie. How about some tea?"
"Sounds wonderful. I've been running all day." She sank onto the sofa and stared down at her uniform, wondering what the best way to approach Chance's feeding would be.
Lanie dug a flannel receiving blanket out of the diaper bag and handed it to her. "There. In case my son comes in. The shock might kill him." She winked, her eyes sparkling, then went in to set water to boil.
Warmed by her thoughtfulness, Rini watched Lanie move around the narrow galley kitchen, which was separated from the living room by a breakfast bar. "How old is he, your son?" she asked conversationally.
"Twenty-nine."
"Oh!" Rini's eyes widened, then she burst out in giggles. "Yes, I see what you mean." She adjusted Chance at her breast. "How many kids do you have?"
Lanie halted with her hand on the whistling kettle, then jerked it away from the hot steam and dabbed at her fingers with a towel. "Two. I have two sons." She turned and stared intently at her. "What did your husband say when you told him I'd be watching the baby?"
"Why does everyone ask me that?" Rini shifted uneasily under
her scrutiny. "I'm sure he'll be as pleased as I am."
Lanie brought the tea tray in and set it on the low table in front of the sofa. She fiddled with the napkins a bit and twirled the plate of cookies on the tray so the big gooey ones were in front of Rini. "He doesn't know, then."
Rini picked up a cookie and nibbled on it. "It won't be a problem."
Lanie's brows lifted skeptically. "Don't count on that. My guess is when he finds out, he'll be storming through that door in record time." Melancholy had seeped into the older woman's voice.
But what possible reason could there be for—
"You see, I'm—"
Oh, Lord. Their eyes met, and Rini realized with dawning horror that she was looking at the one woman on earth Cole would never allow within a mile of his son.
"I'm his biological mother."
Her heart sank. "Oh, Lanie," she said on a groan. "He's going to kill me."
"Me, more likely." The older woman made an attempt at a light tone, but her voice cracked on the words.
Good Lord, Lanie Padilla was Chance's grandmother. "What are we going to do?" Rini groaned again, and slumped down on the sofa. "We'll just have to reason with him, that's all."
Lanie patted her hand. "Somehow, reason is not a word I'd use in the same sentence with Colton Lonetree and Lanie Padilla."
"But why? I just don't understand this...this weird hang-up he's got about you. Lots of adopted kids are reunited with their birth parents and are thrilled about it."
"I don't know, Rini." She shook her head sadly. "I made every effort to see him when he came back to Rincon as a teenager. He would have nothing to do with me then, and he still won't. I guess my giving him away is something he just can't forgive."
They sat quietly for several minutes, the sound of Chance nursing contentedly blending with birdcalls and the rustle of leaves filtering in through the open front door.
Rini thought about Cole not forgiving his mother. She finally understood why he had been so angry when he'd thought she was considering giving up their baby. And why he wouldn't ever forgive her after what she'd done to him, twice now. She had committed the one unpardonable sin—she'd abandoned him, just as his own mother had done. And she'd taken his child, to boot. Colton Lonetree could never love a woman who had done these things to him.
Lucky 7 Bad Boys Contemporary Romance Boxed Set Page 73