by K. A. Berg
He was possibly going to kill me.
I fought back.
I beat him with an iron.
“Natalie!” My name echoed out in the hall. “Natalie!”
Matteo barreled into the room, shoving past the security guard in the doorway. His face was a mask of fear. He looked so frantic that I barely noted Adam behind him as my husband dropped down and pulled me into his arms. His eyes roved all over my face and down my body, taking in all my injuries.
A moment later, a flurry of people invaded the hallway. Police officers, EMTs, hotel management.
A thousand questions were thrown at me, yet all I could focus on was Gerard’s unconscious body being loaded onto a stretcher and wheeled out of the room followed by two police officers.
“Ma’am?” I heard someone say as he or she touched my arm.
My body recoiled from their touch as the room began to fade out. The sounds muted and my vision tunneled as I heard Matteo call my name.
It was as if the moment Gerard was no longer near me, my body and mind could relax. But with that, all the pain, fear, and anguish of the past twenty minutes rushed back in, and I shut down.
Everything went black.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Natalie
“She really gave him hell,” someone with a husky voice said. “She should be proud of herself. Fighting back takes so much courage.”
Matteo’s reply was garbled to my ears, but his voice was clearly identifiable.
“We’ll swing back in a few hours,” the other person told him. “Hopefully, she’ll be awake and feel up to giving a statement. Then you guys can head back to Washington.”
Flashes of my time with Gerard in the hotel room assaulted me in rapid secession. The beeping from something beside me started blaring rapidly.
“Natalie?” Matteo said from my side. When I attempted to turn my head toward him, I was met with sharp pain everywhere. “Natalie, can you hear me?”
I blinked my eyes open as people rushed into the room. A bright light was shined in my eyes one by one as I voice my displeasure with it.
“Natalie,” a strong feminine voice called to me. “I’m Dr. Kurtz. Can you hear me?”
A mangled mashup of sounds left my mouth as I continued to fight the light trying to blind me. Hadn’t I been through enough?
Fingers entwined with mine at my side. “It’s okay, love. You’re safe now.”
The beeping slowed, and the light turned off. I blinked my eyes slowly open.
“Welcome back,” Dr. Kurtz said. “You’ve been asleep for a few hours. That’s nothing to be too concerned about after all you’ve been through. How do you feel?”
In the ten minutes that followed, I learned the extent of my injuries.
It took five stitches to close the gash in my forehead. I had a small hairline fracture in my cheekbone, which should heal on its own. I hadn’t seen the swelling so much as felt it, but she assured me that the swelling would go down after a few days. My ankle had been dislocated, and I had one broken rib. My nose also had to be reset.
When the doctor left the room, Matt twisted his fingers through mine. “I need to ask you something, love.”
With slowness and precision, I turned my head toward him, trying not to upset the dull ache lingering in the back of my skull. He shifted forward and pressed his lips against my knuckles. “What about the kinds of things we can’t see?”
My heart thudded. I knew what he was asking, and I didn’t want to think about Gerard’s filthy hands touching where he wasn’t welcome. My voice was horse and strained. “He—” I cleared my throat. “He touched me.” I swallowed down the bile rising from my gut. “He bit me.” I shuttered thinking and the white-hot pain I felt when he sunk his teeth into my breast. My body started to shake involuntarily.
Matt stood from his chair and sat on the bed, trying to pull my battered body into his. I scooted to the side as far as I could to give Matt enough room to lie next to me and pull me into him. I didn’t care how much I hurt. I needed his comfort as the tears began to leak from my eyes.
Everything was just too much for me for the moment.
“I’m going to head to her hotel and gather her things.” I thought I heard Adam as I came back to consciousness. “I’ll bring them to our hotel. We don’t need her going back to that place.”
“Thanks,” Matteo replied. His chest rumbling under the hand I had resting on his chest. He was still lying on the bed holding me like he had been when I’d closed my eyes. “Can you pop into the gallery and see how everything went with her boss? I know she’ll want to know when she wakes back up.”
“Will do,” Adam said. “How’s she doing? Did she say anything when she woke up?”
Matt didn’t say anything, and a thick silence coated the room. “Understood, I’ll be back.”
Warm lips pressed to my head as the door to the room clicked closed. “I know you’re awake.”
My eyelids felt heavy as they opened, and I took in the room. We sat in silence for a few moments as my fingers toyed with one of the buttons from Matt’s shirt.
“How are you here?” I asked him, remembering that he was here in Portland when he was supposed to be in Seattle.
He inhaled deeply. I felt his heart hammering inside his chest. “I wanted to surprise you by coming tonight.”
Images of him barreling through the crowd into the hotel room flashed in my mind. “But how did you know where I was and what was happening?”
He ran his hand over my tangled hair. “I knew something was wrong because you sounded upset in your message. When you didn’t answer any of my hundred calls back, Adam and I made our way to your hotel to see if you were all right.” He dragged in a ragged breath. “We’d just gotten into town when you called. The security officer answered your phone just as we got outside the hotel. I’m sorry, Natalie.”
I tilted my head up, ignoring the stings that came from moving my head too quickly. “What for? This isn’t your fault. You weren’t even here.”
A haze slipped over his eyes as his jaw clenched. “If I’d just answered your call when you called, this may not have happened.”
I attempted to turn onto my side to face him. He held no responsibility for this, and he needed to know that. “You couldn’t have stopped this from happening,” I told him. “If it wasn’t now, it would have been another time. He followed me here and back at home. He knew we weren’t together. He knew the kids’ names. I was targeted, and there wasn’t anything either of us could have done because we had no idea he was stalking me.”
He tipped my head back gently and stared into my eyes. “I’m so incredibly proud of the warrior you are. I know that you must have been terrified while that animal had his hands on you.”
Not too sure about being proud that I beat a man with an iron, but I was damn grateful I did. I had so much more to live for. So many things left to do. For the first time in weeks, wrapped in Matteo’s arms, everything felt safe again—as if it were all going to be all right.
Tears glistened on my lower lids as I thought about what Gerard had planned to do to me. “For a moment or two, I wasn’t sure I’d ever get to see you again.”
Matteo’s fingers dug into my upper arm as he cradled me against him. He pulled back and looked down at me again. Concern and anguish colored his face. “I’ve never felt fear like I did for those ten minutes, love.”
Exhaustion was beating me down and a dull ache radiated throughout every cell of my being. It seemed as if I’d lived an entire life in the time since I’d left the gallery earlier that day, but I had something important that needed to be done. It couldn’t wait a second longer.
I looked up at Matt. “There’s something that I need to tell you.”
His brow scrunched and worry screamed in his eyes. “What? What is it, love?”
“I was so, so wrong.” The words were thick as I spoke them, laced with regret and shame as he listened with rapt attention. “The way I acted after
our night with Brooke wasn’t fair to you. I acted like an angry child and left you when you needed me most.”
“You did,” he nodded woefully. “It was awful for me. You were the only one who could truly help me battle everything I was feeling, and you weren’t there.”
Tears slipped from the corners of my eyes. He didn’t try to say anything further. He didn’t try to make me feel better about his brutal truth. Instead, he gave me the moment I needed to form my words and continue on as I swallowed the lump lodged in my throat. “You needed me. You told me you needed me. You begged for me to help you through it, and I ignored you like an ungrateful bitch. I’m so damn sorry. I’m sorry because all you’ve ever done is try to make me happy. You’ve always been whatever I needed whenever I needed it, and I repaid your love and dedication by treating you horribly the moment things didn’t go my way. I was selfish and don’t deserve you, but I hope that you can and will forgive me.”
The wetness on his cheeks hurt me more than anything Gerard could’ve ever done. “I know you’re sorry. I know you weren’t doing it to hurt me, but you did. Badly. I’m not saying we can’t move on, but I need you to know that you eviscerated me. That cannot ever happen again, love. We always need to be on the same side.”
I nodded, laid my head back on his chest, and closed my eyes, feeling far more secure than the events of the day should’ve allowed me.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Matteo
My heart had crumbled when I stepped into that hotel room and got a good look at my wife. Before I could even fully assess what the hell had happened to her, she had passed out. Blood and bruising covered her face. There was an alarming amount of swelling from under her right eye to her jawline. I had no doubts she had some serious damage to her nose or cheekbone.
I’d died a thousand deaths in the span of those few minutes. It was like being nauseous, suffocated, and punched in the balls all at the same time.
While we lay together —for the first time in weeks—in that hospital bed all night, I couldn’t stop staring at her. Drinking her all in. Thanking my lucky star that she was brave enough to fight back and I had the chance to hold her once more. She relaxed against me in sleep, and some of the cracks in our foundation filled and settled. When something as scary as yesterday happened, it made us reevaluate our priorities and remember why our relationship was worth fixing.
Her apology and my being able to hold her all night were all I needed to vow to forget about the past two weeks and move forward. We’d learned some hard lessons, but we couldn’t let those lessons hold us back.
My eyes stayed glued to her as she laid in that hospital and napped. I was afraid that, if I blinked, she’d disappear and be back in that room fighting for her life and her safety. She was being released shortly. The detectives had left about half an hour ago with her statement, and Adam was collecting our things from the hotel we were staying at.
Annetta and Bastien fretted over her when they stopped in earlier. They came with a large arrangement of vibrantly colored flowers and jokes to cheer Nat up. “We could take care of him for you,” Bastien offered. “We’ve got ‘friends’ back in Europe who wouldn’t think twice about making him disappear for you.”
Annetta smacked him and said, “Don’t make promises you can’t keep.” She turned to Natalie. “I’m the one with the friends, you just say the word.”
When Annetta tossed in the wink, Natalie laughed and, even though we still had so much left to go through, it was music to my ears.
Someone tried to attack her. Hurt her. She beat a man with an iron to avoid being raped and or killed. She fought off a man who stalked her here from Seattle. She was strong and elegant and brave. She never left my side, and nothing could’ve made me happier.
I’d be calling the owners of the club first thing tomorrow. Immersion was supposed to have top-notch vetting and client security. How Natalie found herself with a stalker from there was unthinkable.
Listening to her statement to Det. Jiménez wasn’t easy. I had to fight back the bile with each detail she revealed. We were told Gerard would stay in holding, waiting to see a judge at some point in the near future for arraignment. They were charging him with assault, forced entry, and sexual assault. When we arrived back in Seattle, we’d file a restraining order and push for stalker charges. We wanted to make sure he stayed in prison for as long as possible so he could never do this to someone else. We also wanted to make sure that, if by some miracle he was release on bail, he couldn’t come anywhere near Natalie without penalty.
“Watching me sleep is creepy when my face doesn’t look like this.” Her voice startled me. “But staring at this swollen mess is even more disturbing.”
I laughed, which felt foreign in my chest. “I can’t help it.” I shrugged. “The nurses are getting your paperwork ready. Want me to help you get changed? Adam is collecting all the rest of our stuff from the hotel.”
She nodded as she pushed herself up in bed. “Thank god for him taking care of that for us. Thank god, he took this trip with you too.”
Natalie was straightening her shirt when the nurse came in with her discharge papers. She couldn’t get it pulled down fast enough for me to miss seeing the welt on her breast that made my blood boil to a rage.
The nurse went over a few things with Natalie, fitted her for crutches since she couldn’t walk on her ankle for at least four weeks, and sent us on our way with a smile.
“You guys ready to head home?” Adam asked, popping his head into the open door. “Your chariot awaits.”
Natalie looked up at me from where she sat on the edge of the bed and smiled. A warmth settled over us as she said, “There’s no place I’d rather go.”
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Natalie
One Month Later . . .
Dr. Alexa Morgan smiled as Matteo and I sat next to each other. “How are the two of you doing this week?”
The two of us glanced between each other, a smile tugging at the corners of our lips. “We’re doing well.”
It felt so good to be able to say that.
The past month had been a bit of a wild ride. Between healing my body, my mind, and my soul, there were days I wasn’t sure I was going to make it through intact.
Nightmares haunted me. Aches and pains assaulted me. Fear made me afraid to be alone.
I was strong and brave. I knew that. But just because things didn’t get to where Gerard wanted to take them, didn’t mean that I made it out whole.
Part of my soul was left back in that hotel room.
But a tiny weight had been lifted when we started seeing a therapist last week. She specialized in marriages and traumas.
She clicked her pen, ready to jot her thoughts as she listened. “Would you like to tell me about your positives this week?”
Warmth was evident in Dr. Morgan’s expression as we explained that the nightmares were less this week. We even went back to Immersion. We didn’t do anything there except have a drink, but it was still a big step for us. We had thought we’d never step foot in there again. Matt was Switzerland. He didn’t care whether we ever went back or not, but I knew I needed to at least try once. Even if it was just to prove to myself I was strong enough.
“Wow,” she said when we finally got to the end. I bet that wasn’t what she was expecting to hear this evening. “First, Natalie.” She directed her attention to me. “What you went through was a terrible and frightening ordeal, you were incredibly brave, and you still are each day you wake up and work toward the future.”
“I was petrified when I realized what was happening. I saw him outside the hotel smoking right before and seeing him was unsettling. It didn’t feel like a coincidence that he was staying in the same hotel as I was for the gallery opening. This was the second time I’d seen him outside the club, and it just felt fishy. I never expected him to attack me, though. As I was fighting him off me, snippets of memories with Matteo and the kids flickered in my mind, reminding me I h
ad things to do with my life and this man wasn’t going to take those things from me.”
Matteo squeezed my hand. His strength and support encompassed me like a caress. He leaned in and kissed my temple. “I’m very proud of you. You’re incredibly strong and resilient.”
Dr. Morgan motioned between us, using her pen as a pointer. “That you still can experience true positive affection between the two of you is an encouraging sign.”
Matteo nodded. “That man may have tried to take from Natalie, but instead he gave us something. What he did reminded us of what we were fighting for.” He smiled at me. It was almost as bright as it was three months ago.
“It’s just sad that it took something so horrible to show me the truth,” I added.
The doctor shook her head. “Do not sell yourselves short, Natalie. You had started to reach out to Matteo before the attack. That call to him because you were feeling uneasy probably saved your life.”
We switched gears after that. “Natalie, how has being back in your home been?”
When I had walked into my house after we returned from Portland, I’d been prepared to be bombarded with snapshots of that night with Brooke, but they didn’t come. Rather than remembering that, I found myself fixating on all the memories with my family.
“I almost feel as if I was worried for nothing,” I admitted. ‘The bedroom came out gorgeous. It feels like an entirely different room. As I sat in the living room the first day back, I wasn’t thinking about the mistakes we made that night but rather last Christmas morning and the joy on the kids’ faces when they opened their new phones.”
After everything that happened with Brooke, I’d been practically blinded by my fixation with the negative. I couldn’t direct my attention at anything other than all the things we had done wrong.
I couldn’t see that we did so much right.