by Jordan Marie
Instead, I’ve spent my time cleaning out my locker at the station and ignoring the snarls and looks of my once fellow cops, wadding up the sticky notices that littered my locker declaring me a snitch and sometimes much worse. I go through meeting after meeting with IAB, turning in every bit of evidence I had gathered against Paul Banks and the three men that worked under him and doing my best to make Roman appear to be a poster child for clean living magazine.
It worked. Roman’s charges were dismissed. I was stripped of my badge and reprimanded, but any charges that might have been filed against me were negated in exchange for helping with IAB’s investigation. I might have not been wearing a wire each time I met with Paul, but I had been using a mini voice recorder in my pocket, catching Paul’s instructions and plans each time. The best evidence came, however, when I informed the detective in charge about a small firebox that Paul kept in his home office. It was a gamble. I remembered it from the times during my training that I would join Paul and several other squad members for a cookout and we planned the best way to set me up to meet Roman. I didn’t realize what a complete moron Paul was until IAB found the trophies Paul kept from every crooked deal he ever made. He was using the proof inside to blackmail members of the squad to do his bidding, but in the end, the proof only helped to arrest him. If karma is real at all, it should lock him up for a long fucking time. His trial is scheduled to begin soon, and I for one can’t wait.
That’s not what tonight is about, however. Tonight is a last ditch effort. I’m at the strip club. I know Roman won’t be here, but he’ll be told I am, especially when I demand to dance. I was never fired, so technically I’m still on staff. It will probably blow up in my face, but maybe Roman will at least come here to talk to me.
Okay, as plans go, it’s shit. I know it. I just know I have to try. I have to. I kept expecting him to reach out to me, especially when he found out that I had cleared his name at the expense of my career. I heard nothing. I thought he would at least talk to me when I showed up at the Stable demanding to see him after Paul was arrested.
I was escorted off the premises. Which leads me to now. I don’t have any hope held out that tonight will end differently than the other numerous times I’ve tried. However, it is my last time to try. If I don’t see Roman tonight, I walk away. It won’t be what I want, but I need to move forward with my life. Besides, I’m getting pissed at him. I know he’s mad and he gets to be angry, but to just refuse to talk to me and walk away as if we were nothing to each other…?
“Ana? What the fuck are you doing here?”
I stop in front of the back dressing rooms, shock flooding through my system. Of all the people I thought would be here tonight, this wasn’t one of them.
“Allen? What—I mean, how… When did this happen?”
“I’m working for Roman a few nights a week. Just to see…”
“See what? Why would he let you work for him? I don’t understand,” I mumble, thoroughly confused. What am I missing here? And why does Allen seem… almost normal? What happened to the angry brother who hated the world? I have so many questions, but before I can ask them, Allen is grabbing my hand.
“You need to get out of here,” he grumbles, his grip firm as he tries to pull me away. I jerk against his hold, easily breaking free.
“I’m not going anywhere. Tonight is my regular night to dance,” I announce. Allen’s eyes go wide and he shakes his head in disbelief. I try to stand tall at my announcement, but avoid looking into Allen’s eyes. The last thing I need is for him to read the panic in them.
“Are you crazy?” Allen cries. “Roman isn’t going to let you dance!”
“Well, he didn’t fire me. Until he does, I’m dancing.”
“Ana, you’re being stupid. If Roman finds out you’re here, he’ll have you escorted out of the club so fast your head will spin. Hell, as mad as he is at you right now, he may have you arrested for trespassing.”
“Then he’ll have to be the one to tell me that himself, won’t he? And when did you become Roman’s right hand man, anyway?”
“I’m trying to change, and Roman’s helping. I’d be glad to talk to you about it. Some other time. Not tonight. There’s shit going on and I need you out of this club.”
“There’s always shit going on. Allen, I can’t leave. I have to talk to Roman,” I finally tell him, desperation and honesty breaking through my stupid plan.
“Ana, he doesn’t want to talk to you right now. You need to give him time. He…”
“He has had time! I at least deserve him telling me that he hates me and never wants to see me again! He owes me that!”
“I don’t owe you anything, Ana.”
I freeze when Roman’s voice interrupts. I turn around slowly to look at the man who has haunted my dreams. He looks as good as he ever did, his suit impeccable, his hair a little longer, but I like it. He has circles under his eyes and a five o’clock shadow that I’ve never seen on him before. It looks good.
“We need to talk, Roman,” I tell him and hope like hell my courage doesn’t disappear.
I hate her. At least that’s what I’ve been trying to tell myself. People don’t lie to me and live. They sure as fuck don’t betray me as deeply as Ana did. I’ve cut her out of my life. I’m done. Those are all things that I’ve repeated to myself over and over the last month. Things that I tried to drum into my head even as I would jack off to the memory of her sweet pussy draining me dry. I thought I had succeeded. I was able to function through the day now instead of wanting to drown myself in booze. The only time I allowed my obsession with her to overtake me was when I was home alone. That had to be progress.
One look at her tonight, and I know I’ve been lying to myself. She’s wearing faded jeans, the fabric worn so much the once dark blue color is practically the color of ice, faded and cold. My fingers itch to hold her ass and see just how soft the cloth would feel. She has on a black t-shirt and it makes her look pale and washed out, but even with that, she’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen in my life.
“We have nothing to say to each other, Ana. You can leave peacefully or I’ll have Bruno escort you.”
“Boss, I can take her home. Ana and I need to talk anyway,” Allen interjects.
Over the past month, Allen has made great strides. I’m even starting to like the kid. I, however, don’t want his interference here.
“You need to go back to work, Allen,” I tell him, not taking my eyes off Ana.
“Ana,” Allen says, and she puts her hand in his and squeezes it. He’s her goddamn brother and that small touch fires jealousy inside of me. I need to get her the fuck out of here before I crumble.
Allen leaves. I never take my eyes away from Ana, and she’s staring right back at me. I can pick up her nervousness, but then again, I’ve always been attuned to Ana and her body. Her body. Jesus, she looks good. Her curves seems fuller, her lips more prominent. What harm would come from just one small sip from them?
“You need to leave,” I order again, my voice gruffer as I fight the hard-on that’s pressing against the zipper of my slacks.
“I don’t want to. I don’t think you want me to either, Roman,” she says, taking a step towards me. It’s all I can do not to back away from her.
“You would be wrong. For some strange reason, I don’t keep women around who think they can play me.”
“I was doing my job,” she says, her face flushed.
“You betrayed me. I don’t give people a second chance to do that, Ana.”
“I need you to give me one,” she says, and her hand reaches out and touches my stomach. I want to groan when electricity charges between us, firing through my blood and making my dick jerk in reaction. People around us have grown quiet. It’s then I remember we’re standing at the dressing rooms of the other girls. I grab her hand on my stomach and practically pull her down the small hall. I don’t stop until we make it into the back room where the private dances are held. This is where the min
x tortured me in the beginning; it seems apt that this is where it should end. It’s deserted when we get there, though I know it will be busy in here soon. I lock the door and turn back to Ana. Her breathing is so ragged, it shakes her body, her face even more flushed. Those violet eyes are dilated. I try to swallow down my need.
“Ana, you need to go.”
“I came here to dance,” she says, kicking off her shoes. I watch her and I’m at war with myself, knowing I need to send her away, but wanting one last taste of her. And why shouldn’t I? She owes me. I’m still who I am. I can take this and send her away. She wants to play the whore? Why shouldn’t I let her? Surely that’s the only reason I don’t stop her when she peels those jeans down over her hips, revealing the peach-colored flesh I want to bite into. They slide further down her legs and she gracefully kicks them off.
Fuck it. Let her dance. I sit in a cushioned chair, waiting and hoping like hell I manage to look bored because I’m anything but.
“I’ve missed you Roman,” she whispers, lifting her shirt over her head.
“If you want to dance, Ana, then dance. But I don’t need the commentary,” I warn her, my voice cold.
I can’t hear her say words that shouldn’t mean a damn thing to me. It shouldn’t matter in the least that she misses me. I don’t miss the fire in her eyes at my words. I’m pissing her off. Good. She should be pissed off. She should feel anger, because it’s all that I’ve felt since that day in the cemetery. Nothing has made it better. Even learning that she told the court that she planted all of the shit on me under orders of a superior officer did nothing to soothe my anger. I wanted to choke her. I wanted to scream and kill her. I wanted to fuck her. No matter the anger and hate inside of me, it always boiled down to that. I wanted to sink into her tight little cunt and fuck her so hard and raw that she’d never walk right again.
I still want that. As she stands in front of me in her silk underthings now, I want it so much my damn cock is salivating in need. Until Ana, I was all about control. Now I have none. Not a fucking drop of it.
She walks towards me, her hips swaying in tune to some imaginary music. Black silk. She’s wearing black silk underwear and it never looked so fucking good. She bypasses the pole and I mourn it. I’d love to see her grinding up against it, spinning around, opening her legs…
All thoughts of it stop, however, when she stands in front of me. She puts her hands on my shoulders and leans down so her breasts are in front of my face. It might be my imagination, but they look larger than I remember, so fucking ripe and big that I could push my cock into their depths and wrap them tight around my shaft and fuck myself with them. I resist… barely.
Her finger nails drag down my chest, stopping at my tie, and she quickly undoes it with just a few easy moves. I’d be impressed if my eyes weren’t glued to the way her hips are moving as if she’s sliding back and forth on my cock. She leans down and, as she unbuttons my shirt, her tongue licks a path down my chest. My hands bite into the armrest of the chair I’m in to keep from touching her. It’s a wonder I don’t break off the damn thing.
“I thought you didn’t do private dances,” I grumble, my voice hoarse.
Ana stops and looks at me, her eyes full of desire. Against my will, my hand goes to my cock, which is rock hard, and I grab it, squeezing it tight to try and hold the fucker back from coming in my damn pants. Not again. Not…
All thought stops when Ana unhooks her bra and throws it to the floor. Next, she slides down the barely-there scrap of lace that had covered her pussy. The lips of that juicy cunt are plump and covered in her desire, slick and wet to the eye, and I breathe in the scent of her arousal. What man could resist that? Especially when they know firsthand how fucking good it is.
“I’ll let you in on a secret, Roman,” she says, sinking to her knees between my legs. I don’t stop her when she starts undoing my belt. If anything, I widen my legs. She wants fucked? I can fuck her. Doesn’t mean I won’t send her on her way when it’s done.
“What’s that?” I ask, closing my eyes as she lowers the zipper and snakes her hand inside to wrap it around my dick.
“I didn’t come here to dance for you,” she whispers before sliding my cock in her mouth and devouring it.
Against my will, my hand tangles in her hair as I watch inch by inch of my shaft disappear in that sweet haven. She doesn’t stop, sliding down on my dick and letting it stretch her mouth. She takes me all the way to the back of her throat, only stopping when her nose is pushed up against the small nest of curls on my body. I feel the small puffs of air hit my skin as she breathes. She starts to pull off my dick, and I selfishly tighten my hold on her hair, not letting her, needing to savor this moment. Finally, I’m the one who pulls her off of my dick. My fingers so tangled in her hair, I know it’s hurting her, but she doesn’t fight. I drag her face up to mine, admiring the way her lips shine with a combination of her saliva and my pre-cum. They’re puffy from the rough way I moved her head on my dick. Beautiful.
“You want fucked, Ana? I’ll fuck you. It’s not going to change anything,” I warn her, or maybe myself. “You need a dick, I’ll give it to you.” I growl again before taking her mouth with my own.
I take Roman’s kiss, and it’s a punishing kiss. It’s a kiss full of anger, betrayal, and desire. I take it, even as his words wound me. His tongue pushes into my mouth, hard and unforgiving. I let him conquer my mouth, drinking in his taste. If all I get is this one night, then I’m going to take it and hopefully live on it the rest of my life.
When we break apart, we’re both breathing hard. He holds me prisoner by the way he has my hair. He roughly turns me so my back is to him, lifting me up on his lap so I’m forced to straddle his legs. His grip on my hair lets go, but only to be replaced by an equally punishing grip on my hip as he holds me suspended in the air.
“Is this what you want, Ana? Did you come here like a dog in heat needing my cock?” he growls, his words wounding me while at the same time sending my desire up another notch. There’s nothing I can say to him that will reach him. I understand that now. So be it. If this is the end of whatever we were to each other, there’s nothing I can do. So I give him the only words he wants from me.
“Fuck me, Roman,” I tell him.
He doesn’t answer, not with words. He growls out at me. His voice raw and untamed like a wounded animal and I can hear what he thinks I don’t. I hear the hurt and anger mixed in it. It’s not my imagination; it permeates the air around us. I did that. I betrayed Roman. I swallow down the wave of sadness inside of me and concentrate on the here and now. He thrusts me down on his cock, slamming into me with so much force that it feels like he might tear me apart. Fear hits me for a moment. I want him, but I can’t let him… I grab his hand from my hip and pull it up my side and to my breast. I knead my breast with it while rotating my hips and grinding my pussy against his dick. Soon, his other hand joins in and he’s holding both of my breasts while I ride him. I’m tightening the muscles of my pussy against his shaft, moving up and down on him and riding him in a way I know will bring him the most pleasure—in the way he taught me to ride him.
“You feel so good, Roman. I love the way you fill me, so big and wide I can taste you when you’re inside of me.”
“Shut up, Ana,” he growls, his hands punishing my breasts in a way I know will leave bruises.
“I need you, Roman. I’ve been so lost without you,” I tell him, my head going back against his shoulder as my body rides him faster, twisting my hips to the side so he rakes against the soft walls of my pussy. He’s so warm and hot, filling me so tightly that I swear I can feel the ridges of his dick inside me, scraping every nerve ending I have.
“You just needed fucking. Any dick would do, Ana. It’s just sex.”
“I’ll never have anyone but you inside of me, Roman,” I answer him honestly. “Oh, God, baby. I’m going to come.”
“Goddamn you, Ana,” he groans, but I can feel the way his muscles tighte
n. He’s getting ready to come too.
“Please, Roman, give me your cum. Unload it all in me. Give me enough to keep me warm even after you send me away,” I cry beyond the point where I can feel shame. Giving him honesty is so much easier when I don’t have to see him and can just let go and stare straight ahead, losing myself in the sensations he’s drawing from my body.
“Fuck,” he moans from behind me, his hands leaving my breasts to slide down my sides to my hips. One goes even further, not stopping until his fingers find my clit. He manipulates it and I cry out his name on a low, whining moan as my climax thunders through my body. I can feel myself coming all over his shaft as spasm after spasm shakes me to my core. My hands are biting into the arms of the chair as I lose myself. I hear Roman’s roar a moment later and then feel the first hot splash of cum inside of me, followed by another and another. I continue riding him through his own orgasm, unable to do anything but feel.
“I love you, Roman. I love you,” I whisper. “I’ll always love you.”
She’s destroyed me. I thought she had before, but I had no idea. As I’m left sitting here with Ana resting against my chest and the final aftershocks of my orgasm finishing, I know now. She’s destroyed me. The cries of her telling me she loved me are still echoing in my ears. What the fuck am I supposed to do with that? I give myself a couple moments before I pull her off of me. I can’t breathe. I need to distance myself from this. From her. She stands, almost falling. I stand up, zipping up my pants and needing to get away. Needing to get away from her body… Fuck, I’m choking on the scent of her.
“Roman?”
I can’t look back at her. I can’t. “I can’t do this, Ana. I’m not giving you an opportunity to betray me again. I’m not a man who does love. That doesn’t exist. The only instinct that matters is survival,” I tell her when I reach the door, my back to her.