by Judy Corry
"I like that." I glanced up at him briefly, liking once again how tall he felt beside me. "Do you have a favorite genre?"
He shrugged, his elbow brushing against my arm with the movement and sparking my skin to life. "I should probably say that the personal development books or the biographies are my favorite since those help me keep up the scholarly vibe I try to put off." He peeked over at me, a smirk playing at his lips. "But I guess if you were to hook me up to a lie detector machine, I'd have to admit that a really good fantasy, like one from Brandon Sanderson, is actually the kind of book I prefer to get lost in when I'm reading for pleasure."
"Would it be safe to say that when you pulled out that Spanish personal development book during my first dinner at the academy, you were really just trying to impress me?"
He rubbed his neck with his hand, a slight blush showing on his cheeks. "I was actually reading that book. But…" He shrugged. "Maybe subconsciously I was trying to let you think I was a serious student who didn't have time for trivial things, like making friends with the pretty new girl at school."
"So you thought I was pretty when you met me?" I arched an eyebrow, liking that he was giving me some insight into his first impression of me.
"Maybe." He shrugged. "But since I had already decided that I wasn't going to waste time on dating this year, I tried to not let myself notice."
"Ah yes. Because girls are such a huge distraction from the more important things, like getting straight A's and reading impressive books while you eat."
"To be fair, I was still nursing my wounded ego after having my ex-girlfriend dump me for a prince."
"And how has your heart been doing the past few weeks?" I put my hand over his chest where his heart was. "Has it gotten any better?"
He covered my hand with his, the warmth of his skin on mine feeling incredible. "Would you believe me if I told you it might just be better than it's ever been?"
When I lifted my gaze to meet his, the intensity in his eyes scorched my insides, because I had the idea that they might be telling me I was part of the reason why.
His gaze fell to my lips, and I instinctively licked them, anticipating what it would be like to kiss him again.
But since I still wasn't sure exactly where his feelings were concerning me, I tried to push those thoughts away.
He broke eye contact and moved toward his desk. After opening the top drawer, he pulled out a familiar contract with my purple handwriting scrawled across the bottom of the piece of paper.
"I have a confession to make," he said.
"You do?" I asked, feeling breathless for some reason at the sight of that contract and the possible reasons for him to bring it out.
"That third rule on my list of demands actually surprised me when we went over it."
"It surprised you?" I narrowed my eyes, not understanding.
He nodded and leaned against his desk, partially sitting on it. "You see, I never wrote that rule."
"You didn't?"
He shook his head. "It was actually put there as a prank by my conniving little brother."
"Nash put it there?" I gasped, shocked because when we'd gone over it, Carter had not seemed one bit surprised at its existence. He'd played the part of the arrogant jerk so well.
"I kind of panicked there for a minute as I tried to figure out how to respond," he said. "But then I channeled my inner Ian and decided to go with it."
"So you don't really have throngs of girls throwing themselves at you on a daily basis?" I asked. "Was that just you bluffing?"
"It depends on what you define as a throng." And I didn't know if he was trying to channel his inner Ian again, but the smoldering look that he gave me then was totally that of a guy who knew exactly how hot he was.
And I liked it.
I liked a guy with a healthy dose of confidence.
"Well," I said, deciding that if he was going to bring back his whole Haughty Mc-Hot Hot persona, then I should bring back my inner goddess, too. I straightened my shoulders and said, "I guess I probably shouldn't tell you about the dozens of guys I had to turn down this week because I had to keep our fake girlfriend-and-boyfriend thing going.”
"Only dozens?" Carter cocked an eyebrow and let his gaze slowly wander all along my body, obviously raking me in.
I held my breath as I waited for him to finish his appraisal of me.
I knew deep down that I shouldn't care what a guy thought of me because I knew that I was awesome on my own and didn't need anyone's approval.
But there was still a huge part of me that wanted Carter to approve of me.
Wanted him to want me in the way I very much wanted him.
After he'd finished eyeing me from head to toe and then back up again, he said, "Are you sure it wasn't hundreds? Because I don't think a girl like you comes around more than once in a lifetime."
"You don't?" I breathed, my heart stuttering in my chest.
Did he truly mean it?
Did Carter, this guy who could have any girl he wanted at our entire school, actually see me that way?
But because I was basically fluent in finding the loophole in all compliments directed at me, I said, "You remember I'm an identical twin, right? So, someone like me actually did come around more than once in your lifetime. We came around twice."
Carter chuckled at my logic. Then looking at me with the sincerest expression in his blue eyes, he said in a low voice, "You may have a look-alike, but you, Ava, are one in a million." He traced his thumb across my cheek. "You’re entirely and unapologetically yourself, and I kind of love that about you."
Swirls of heat bloomed across my cheek where he caressed it, and I wanted to just live in this moment forever. I wanted to have him touch me like that everywhere.
But instead of continuing to caress my cheek or tangle his fingers in my hair like I wanted him to, he dropped his hand and reached for the contract again.
He held the paper up between us, and for a moment I wondered what he planned to do with it, but then he started tearing it down the middle.
"You're ripping up our contract?" I asked.
He nodded. "My lawyer never got back to me about the loophole, but if it's okay with you, I'd kind of like to get rid of this right now."
"Does this mean you don't care if I show up on time to our tutoring sessions anymore then?" I asked.
He shook his head. "That's not the rule I have an issue with."
"You don't want me to be ready and willing to learn from you?"
He shook his head again, ripping the contract in half once more. "Not that one, either."
"You don't like the part I added?"
"I'm pretty sure I'm already guilty of breaking that little addendum of yours," he said in a soft voice. "I mean, who couldn't help but fall for a girl who is a goddess on earth with the most enchanting personality, charming wit, and captivating eyes?"
I couldn't breathe.
Was he saying he'd fallen for me?
He ripped the contract pieces in half again. After tossing them on to the floor, he sat on the wooden chair beside his desk, reached for my hand and pulled me closer so I was standing between his splayed legs.
"I don't think I can keep up my half of the bargain anymore, Ava," he said. "I know we said we'd only pretend to like and flirt with each other." His thumb rubbed the skin along my knuckles. "And I said that falling for you wouldn't be a temptation in the least, but I'm realizing that I was just lying to myself because falling for you has been the easiest thing I've ever done."
He pulled me even closer to him, so close that I had no other choice but to climb onto his lap. His hands gripped my hips and he leaned forward so our foreheads were touching. As he was looking deeply into my eyes, I knew that falling for Carter was the easiest thing I'd ever done, too.
I hadn't really expected it. Sure, I'd thought he was the most beautiful-looking human I'd ever laid eyes on the moment I met him, but that had nothing on what I knew about who he was as a person now.
He was a little rough around the edges at times, but he was a good brother, a loving son, a caring friend. An all-around good person. And based on everything I'd seen from him the past few weeks, I also knew he'd make for an amazing boyfriend.
As we stared at each other, both of our breaths coming in short bursts, I knew I needed to tell him how I felt. So I gathered up as much courage as I could—because, let’s face it, this moment was what dreams were made of and I really didn't want to mess it up—and said, "You're not the only one who breached the contract. Because I think that I'm falling for you, too."
He searched my eyes for a moment, as if he wasn't sure he'd heard me right. But then he cupped my face in his hands and kissed me. His lips met mine in a long, slow kiss, and I knew from the urgency of his kiss that he’d been wanting this very thing to happen for as long as I had. That kiss in the woods had sparked something real inside us and the longer we tried to ignore it, the stronger the desire became. He cared about me. He wanted me.
The thought that someone like Carter could actually feel those things about me flooded my chest with a lightness I hadn't felt in a very long time—maybe never before.
"I've been thinking about doing this," he mumbled against my lips in between kisses. "Every day for the past two weeks."
"Me too." I sighed.
He slid his hands up and down my back as he kissed me, and it felt incredible. I slipped my hands into his hair, remembering how much he'd liked it the last time I did that. And when he let out a light moan, I couldn't keep the slight smile from taking shape on my lips because I liked that I could do this to him.
"You're trouble, you know that?" he mumbled in between kisses.
"Good trouble, right?" I asked, pulling away for a second to take a much-needed breath.
He nodded and said, "Very good trouble," before he started trailing kisses down my neck.
28
Carter
Was this actually happening? Was I actually kissing the most beautiful girl in the world in my room right now?
Because if this was reality, then I must have done something very good in a previous life to deserve a moment like this.
I breathed in Ava's scent as I kissed her neck. She smelled like lavender and pear with a hint of something citrus. I had no idea if it was from her body wash, lotion, perfume, or maybe a mix of all three, but I wanted to breathe in her scent all day and happily get drunk on her.
I'd never been drunk before, never even had a sip of wine from my parents’ wine cellar, but I had a feeling that being drunk felt a lot like how I felt kissing Ava—fuzzy and warm and deliriously happy. Happier than I'd been in such a long time. It was as if I hadn't truly known what it was like to be alive until I met this vivacious girl. And the more I was with her, the more I never wanted to be apart.
I explored her neck and jawline, enjoying the erratic way she was breathing and the slightly salty taste of her skin. But as I trailed kisses across her collarbone, I could tell she was anxious for me to find her lips again because she took my face in her hands and directed it back up to hers.
"Just kiss me, Carter," she commanded. "I need your lips on mine now."
I couldn't help but smile because I liked that she wanted me and wanted this kiss as much as I did. Not about to argue with this feisty girl, I obliged. I sucked gently on her bottom lip, lightly flicked my tongue against her cherry-flavored mouth. And when she opened her mouth to mine, I didn't hesitate to explore.
My stomach muscles tightened as our tongues danced together, and when she moaned into the kiss and pressed herself closer to me, all I could think was that I wanted more.
So much more.
I wanted everything.
Her hands slid down my shoulders and arms, and when she squeezed and then explored my chest with her palms, I was thankful that I'd been putting in the extra time in the gym because I wanted her to like what she felt there.
She must have liked what she felt because when she finished exploring the contours of my chest with her hands, she slipped them under the hemline of my T-shirt and slid them along my stomach and lower back, sending electrical jolts coursing through my system.
I moved my hands along her back again, pulled them along her hips and squeezed the tiny bit of softness she had there. My fingers trailed along the sliver of skin above her jeans, and I loved how warm and smooth her skin was.
"This is so crazy," she said breathlessly, pushing her long hair away from her face and pulling it over one shoulder.
"I know." I sighed into her mouth, my heart racing so fast it felt like it might explode.
Our kisses grew deeper and longer, the movement of our hands on each other slowing down, and my whole body ached for her. I wanted more.
I moved my hands down her back, slipping them down along the underside of her thighs. And then bracing the weight of her body in my hands I stood from the chair, carrying her with me and laying her on my bed.
I didn't have plans for anything more than kissing, since I didn't want to rush things, but when she looked up at me with heavy lidded eyes as I lay on the bed beside her, I couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to take things all the way with Ava.
From what she'd said the first time she came to my room, it didn't sound like she’d slept with a guy before. So if we ever took that step, it probably wouldn't be for a long time down the road.
But I liked the idea of experiencing that first with her someday.
Not because I was some hormonal teenager who just wanted to have sex because guys were genetically wired to reproduce—though I was sure my hormones had something to do with it since I was definitely still a guy who noticed that Ava was a woman. But if we ever took that step, it would be because it would be with her. It would be special. It would actually mean something.
I shook those thoughts away. Here I was just barely kissing this girl for the second time in my life after only telling her a few seconds ago that I was falling for her, and I was already hoping for months and years ahead together.
It was insane, wasn't it?
But that was the magic of being around Ava Cohen, I guess. She made me want a future like that. A future where I got to spend my days laughing with her, growing into a better person alongside her, and building a lifetime of memories with her.
And when she reached her arms around my shoulders and back and pressed her body against mine until there was barely enough space left for me to breathe, I had a feeling that I might not just be falling for her, I might have already fallen.
29
Ava
Is this real? I wondered as Carter deepened our kiss further, sending my mind off into a frenzy where anything before or after this moment didn't exist anymore. There was only now. Only me and Carter. And only this magical feeling that I knew I would crave for the rest of my life.
I suddenly understood why people could get addicted to drugs or alcohol or sex, because once you experienced such euphoria, you knew just exactly how amazing you could feel and how you would want to suddenly rearrange all of your plans just to get your next fix.
I was in the middle of a kissing session with Carter, but already I was wondering when the next time would be that I could kiss him.
Like, was his schedule already full for the weekend and I would I have to wait several days until I could find myself tangled up in his arms again? Or was he free tomorrow for lunch so I could get a quick fix in the library stacks after scarfing down a bite to eat?
Regardless of how long I had to wait, though, I knew that this needed to happen again. I needed to kiss Carter as often and long as possible.
"We'll probably need to leave in a few minutes so you're not late for curfew," Carter said, briefly breaking the lock he had on my lips.
"I know." I sighed, taking a much-needed deep breath. "But not a second sooner, okay?"
He grinned, his smile reaching his eyes as he said, "Deal."
He started kissing me again, and as he led my lips in the
exchange so hot it was turning my mind to goo, his hands crept along the hem of my shirt and smoothed up across the ridges of my ribcage. I'd never had a boy touch my skin there before, never wanted a guy to become so familiar with me until this very moment, but as his fingers ran across the sensitive skin of my stomach, sparks of electricity sizzled all over my core before spreading to my toes.
It felt incredible.
So freaking incredible.
His hand traveled across my hips and along my back. And as my nerve endings reacted and blood flowed to every part that he touched, I wanted to erase every molecule of air that separated us. I wanted there to be no space where we weren't connected.
When he rolled me onto my back and covered my body with his, I instinctively arched into him, needing to feel that contact between our bodies. Carter was all hard, lean muscle, and I reveled in everything that he was. He felt amazing. He smelled amazing. And the fact that he seemed to be as into me as I was into him boggled my mind.
If you were to ask me on that first day of school after he'd had me sign that contract if I'd ever see myself doing anything remotely close to kissing Carter Hastings, I would have laughed in your face. But here we were, making out on his bed less than a month into the school year, and he was suddenly the only guy I ever wanted to do this with for the rest of my life.
I knew that once I was back in my room tonight and separated from this intoxicating feeling, that I'd probably think I was crazy for wanting to give all my firsts to a guy I met in high school—to think about building a life together and eventually having babies together. But my current frame of mind didn't care about logic; it only cared about making sure moments like this kept on happening for the rest of my existence.
It was possible for seventeen-year-olds to fall in love and eventually get their own happily-ever-after, wasn't it? Those kinds of things didn't just happen in books and movies, right?
Of course I wouldn't talk about wanting anything like that with Carter right now, probably wouldn't even mention it to Elyse since most people considered that line of thinking as insane.