"I was putting together the final details of our trip," he said.
"Where are we going? The cabin?" I asked.
We had been back to the cabin several times in the past couple of months. I felt like it was our saving grace as we adjusted to life in Albuquerque. Things had been great, but in trying to adjust to everything, we still had to remind ourselves that we were developing a whole new relationship. And with all the exciting things going on in our world, we made sure that we got back out to the cabin pretty regularly so that we could shut everything and everyone out, except for each other.
"No, not the cabin," said Elijah, shaking his head. "Somewhere else. Somewhere we're long overdue for visiting. At least one of us is, anyway.”
"You’re right,” I agreed. “What we need to do is head back to the cave since it's warmer now, so that we can relive that amazing night that we had. This time, we can do it without freezing our asses off. And now, since we're in committed relationship, we don't have to worry about fumbling around with condoms. We can try it bareback without anything holding us back. That sounds like an amazing trip."
“I’m talking about something completely different,” he said. “I mean, don’t get me wrong. I like that bareback idea and I definitely want to take you back to that cave. But there are some other outstanding issues to resolve first somewhere else maybe, don’t you think?”
His words bounced around in my head for minute and I started to go into a mild panic. I realized how he said that one of us was long overdue for a visit, followed by there being things to resolve, and it was only then that it all clicked in my head. He wanted to go to Iowa with me.
"Wait. Maybe we should think about this a little more..." I stammered, feeling immediately overwhelmed with thoughts of how going to Iowa was one of the last things that I wanted to do.
"I know that it seems hard. Trust me, when I first started to face my fears, I was scared. I wanted to run. But, I had you there to help me through that. And now you have me to be here for you."
I wasn't as confident as he was that this would turn out to be a good thing, but I went anyway. We packed up the truck and drove to Iowa. It was one of the best road trips that I'd ever been on. We stopped and took pictures whenever we saw anything interesting. There were so many street signs, statues, and wildlife that we got pictures of. It definitely was a trip that I would never forget.
Driving down the street where I had lived while sitting next to Elijah was surreal. I thought that my heart would beat out of my chest and my palms were so sweaty.
"We're here," Elijah announced as he pulled the truck to a halt in the parking lot outside my apartment building. I wasn't sure what I would find once I went inside. My father and I hadn't talked since I had left for my trip to Colorado. After that, I had just relocated to Albuquerque with Elijah. I made sure that all of the bills were paid at the old apartment, though.
"I haven't talked to my dad in over six months," I admitted, staring down at my hands folded in my lap shamefully.
"It's okay," said Elijah. "I'll wait here. Go and talk to him and I will be right here. If you want me to come in, I can do that, too."
I thought for a minute before responding.
"Let me go and see what's going on and then I'll let you know," I said. Elijah nodded.
I got out of the car, stretching the stiffness out of my legs and back. The walk down the sidewalk heading toward my apartment seemed more like a death march. I was almost certain that once I opened the door, I was not going to like what I saw.
When I walked up to the door of the apartment, I could hear the drone of the TV set. I couldn’t help feeling like Elijah should be with me. So, I leaned out over the balcony and nodded my head in a motion that signaled he should come up, after all. He quickly got out of the car and began heading in my direction as if he knew I was going to change my mind. We seemed to have secret ESP couple language like that.
Once Elijah was with me where he belonged, I took his hand. Then with my other one, I put my key in the lock and pushed the door open. The lights were on, but I didn't see anyone in the living room.
"Oh, you're home," said my father, walking into the room. He had on a button up white shirt and suit pants.
"Where are you going all dressed up?" I asked, surprised. My dad smiled shyly.
"Oh, I have a job interview,” he said, smiling proudly. “Your old dad is trying to turn his life around.”
“That’s wonderful,” I told him. “I’m so proud of you.”
“And I'm so glad to see that the relationship between your mother and I didn't ruin your chances at love,” he told me, nodding at Elijah before extending his hand to meet him. “I wasn't sure that I would ever get the chance to see you walk down the aisle, but it looks like all of that may change?"
My father looked at Elijah questioningly.
"Dad..." I said, beginning to fidget uncomfortably.
"Don't 'Dad' me, I'm just saying. It's a good thing. I am very happy for my daughter and her... boyfriend?" my dad said, a smile creeping up on his face.
"Yes, boyfriend," said Elijah. "For now, that is. If things keep going the way they have been, I have a pretty good feeling that you'll be walking your daughter down the aisle soon."
I hadn't expected to hear him say that, but it made me happy he did. He wanted to marry me. He had helped me reunite with my dad just as I’d helped him reunite with his SEAL friends. And we’d both found purpose in the veterans’ charity work. It looked as if I had gotten my very own happily ever after, after all.
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SEAL's Virgin: A Bad Boy Military Romance
Copyright © 2017 by Juliana Conners; All Rights Reserved.
Published by Sizzling Hot Reads
Chapter 1—Riley
Okay, I can do this. I can have an orgasm.
I lie back on my bed, feeling stupid. This is definitely not how I'd expected to start off my morning. But my friend Brynn had dared me to try it, after last night had turned out a lot more disappointing than I'd expected.
I was supposed to go on a date with my boyfriend Charles but he never called. He'd been at a golf tournament with some clients of our law firm and he'd texted me at around eight o'clock p.m. to say that the "entertainment" of said clients was running late.
So, I'd called Brynn and she'd told me come over for a bottle of merlot. Of course I went right over, since I had nothing better to do and since Brynn is my BFF. Also, because I needed wine.
"I really thought Charles might be the one I’d lose my virginity to," I'd confessed to Brynn.
Brynn's one of the few people who know that I still have my virginity. We've been friends for a long time and she’s never teased me about it like the few others had when they'd first found out.
"Now I'm thinking that's a lost cause. Just like the few other boyfriends I've had, he's just not special enough. He'd rather blow me off than… let me blow him."
Brynn had laughed and then said, "I think that's your problem, Riley. You want your first time to be so special, with 'the right guy.' You should just let loose and go with it, see what happens."
"With Charles?" I'd asked her, scrunching up my nose skeptically.
She shrugged.
"Well, if you guys can work out whatever's been going on with you this time around, then maybe. Although, it seems like maybe you both know it's time to call it quits, but neither of you wants to be the one to push the 'End’ button."
"Again," I’d added her to her statement. "Neither o
f us want to be the one to push the 'End' button once again, after we've re-started it so many times."
Charles and I had broken up so often it wasn't even funny. I don't even know why we keep trying. Except that his dad, Jack Holt, is the founding partner of our law firm, and pressures him to stay with a "rising star" at the firm, such as myself. He thinks my ambitious attitude will rub off on his son, who would rather play video games than write briefs.
"When I really face the truth, Charles and I are together for all the wrong reasons," I'd confessed to Brynn. "I used to think he only stayed with me because his dad wanted him to, and that's probably true. But then, why do I stay with him when he keeps ditching me for better plans? I suppose I like that the founding partner of the firm wants me to be dating his son. I'm afraid I won't be able to stand on my own two feet without him propping me up."
"Don't be ridiculous," Brynn had said. "You've always been a straight-A student. You’ve worked so hard on all your cases and you've more than earned your place at the firm. But I think change is just hard. It's easier to stay with the wrong person than take a step to be alone or find someone better."
"Yeah," I'd sighed, downing the rest of my wine.
Brynn had happily poured me another glass. And that’s why I love her.
"If you're going to break up with him, do it soon, so you can lose your virginity to someone else," Brynn then said, in her no- nonsense way. "And in the meantime, at least treat yourself to a mind-blowing orgasm."
I'd just looked at her, before finally finding the nerve to confess a secret even worse than the fact that I'm still a virgin.
"I… don't exactly know how to do that, either," I'd finally said.
"What?" she'd exclaimed, her eyes growing wide. "You don't masturbate?"
"It's not that I never have," I'd told her. "I just… haven't had the best luck so I don't get what it's all about."
"Girl, you've got to be kidding me," she'd said, standing up.
She went over to her bedside table, pulled something out of a drawer, and came back.
"Here," she said, handing me a silver, egg-shaped contraction wrapped in plastic. "Don't ever say I never gave you anything."
"What is this?"
I'd held the egg in my hand, realizing that I had an idea what it was, but feeling rather embarrassed.
"It's a magic bullet," she'd said. "Your own personal vibrator. Don't worry— I haven't used it. I just ordered a new one from Simple Pleasures because I wore my old one out. That’s how much I masturbate. And it’ll be hard not to have another one for a little while. But for you, I can wait and order a new one."
"Oh, my God," I'd said, blushing. "I can't believe you just have these things laying around."
"Whatever," she'd said, rolling her eyes at my innocence, as usual. "There are entire sex toy parties based off these things now. I'm hardly the only woman in America with a vibrator— or six— in my bedside stand."
"Six?"
"Riley," she'd told me, shaking her head. "Just try it. You'll love it. I promise."
So here I am. After way too much wine and too little sleep, I'd woken up at Brynn's house at five a.m. and bolted home. I hate trying to sleep after I've had too much to drink— I always wake up early and can never go back to sleep.
After lying down in my own bed and trying to fall back asleep for a while, I gave up. There's still half an hour before I have to start getting ready for work, so I take the "magic bullet" out of my purse and stare at it.
This is really it. My first orgasm. Here it comes.
I lie back on my pillow and spread my legs. I hit the "on" switch and put the vibrator up to my clit.
Mmmmm. That does feel good…
It hums against me, cold and metallic as it works its magic. I suppose it’s aptly named. I still feel silly getting so up close and personal with an inanimate object. I decide to think about Charles.
But I can't. After trying to picture him, all I can think of is the text he’d sent me last night, which had let me know once again exactly how unimportant I am to him. Not to mention the fact that he’d never followed up with another text.
How I wish I could be with a different guy— one who appreciates me and who wants me to be pleasured. Not just someone who is with me because his dad wants him to be. Because he's used to life being handed to him on a silver platter and to doing whatever Daddy wants, to make Daddy happy and his own life easier.
I can't think about that right now, though. I have an orgasm to accomplish.
Instead, I try to conjure up images of celebrities I think are hot. Muscular, toned guys— strong and courageous and not afraid to take risks. The exact opposite of Charles.
Finally, I feel a tingling down below. It feels like a small current of electricity. I draw my breath in, waiting for something more.
But nothing else comes.
I stop the vibrator.
Was that it?
Damn it. I don’t even know.
I was expecting erupting fireworks, but that was just a little fizz.
I should keep going. Try again.
I know that if Brynn was here she'd be saying, "Don't give up. You deserve this."
But it's time to get ready for work. At least I felt something. It was a step in the right direction.
I wash the vibrator and open the drawer of my bathroom sink to put it away. I place it inside an old makeup bag that has a bright red and turquoise elephant print on it, and then, just for good measure, I cover it up with a tin box that holds barrettes. If for some reason any guest ever needs to use this bathroom, hopefully they’ll never find my dirty little secret.
I'll have to try it again another time. Maybe it's one of those things I'll get better at with practice.
For now, it's time to go to work, and see Charles, and start dealing with things I'm not sure I'm ready to deal with.
The tough guys I was thinking of just a moment ago are only for fantasy. My real life awaits.
Chapter 2 – Riley
When I get to work, Charles is nowhere to be found. I try to nonchalantly meander on over to his office to look for him, but a fellow associate named Trina stops me before I can even get there.
"Looking for Charles?" she asks, grinning.
Damn it.
She is so not the person I want to see right now. She's always had a crush on Charles and I'm sure she's taking great pleasure in the fact that I'm unsuccessfully trying to track him down.
"I just needed to talk to him about a case," I say quickly, defensively, as if I had indeed seen or at least spoken to my boyfriend last night as planned, and just need to talk business this morning.
"I see," she says, raising a perfectly plucked eyebrow to show she doesn't believe me. "Well, I doubt he'll be in any time before noon. We had quite the night last night."
"You—?"
I trail off, trying not to sound surprised.
What is she talking about?
"Oh yeah, after the Westin Invitational— it's a shame you don't golf, by the way; it's a great way for female associates to be able to woo clients just like the male associates do, and there are some real hotties on the course as well— we took some clients to Closed Door."
She laughs, as if she had just told me that she and my boyfriend had taken clients shopping at Walmart, rather than to the seediest strip club in town.
"Oh, he didn't tell you?" she asks, with pity, reading the look on my face.
From the way she’s smirking at me, I can tell she suspected I didn’t know, and that she’s happy to have her suspicions confirmed.
"I—"
I begin, but I don't really have anything to say. I'm completely taken off guard.
"It's okay," she says, her lip pouting as if trying to be friendly. "I know a lot of— girlfriends— is that what you still are to him?— aren't into the strip club scene so he probably didn't want to hurt your feelings and tell you. I left at about midnight because I had to finish up the Colvert case briefing but he was
still partying hard with a few of the clients and a lot of the dancers. That's why I'm betting he won't be in any time soon. Not that he has to— being the boss' son and all, you know?"
"Thanks for letting me know," I tell her, as if I'm truly grateful when clearly I'm not.
I'm about to tell her I have a lot to do this morning anyway, so I'll just catch him this afternoon. But suddenly it hits me. I'm sick of taking crap from other people about my "relationship" with Charles.
"I'm sure his dad will be happy to hear that you guys were keeping the clients entertained," I tell her, with a grin as fake as the one she was just flashing at me.
"Oh, I don't think there's any reason to fill him in on that," she says, with a nervous giggle.
Jack Holt likes when his son entertains clients but there’s no doubt he wouldn’t approve of the strip club aspect of last night’s entertainment. He’s notorious for saying his son lacks judgment and decency sometimes. Trina and I both know that Jack would not be happy to hear about their exploits last night.
As if on cue, Jack’s secretary Cindy rounds the corner. Jack Holt has assistants that will track down anyone he needs, at any time, but when Cindy—who has been with him for over twenty years and is his main secretary who can’t usually be bothered to do such dirty work— is looking for an associate, we know it’s serious business.
"Oh, there you are, Riley," she says, shaking her head nervously. "Mr. Holt has been looking for you. He would like to talk to you in Conference Room B."
Trina looks scared, so I wink at her, as if to tell her I'll be filling in Mr. Holt on everything.
Secretly, though, I'm just as scared as Cindy looks. Cindy coming to get me can only mean that Jack wants to do my evaluation today, and from the nervous look on Cindy’s face, I can tell it won't be completely smooth sailing.
Today just keeps going from bad to worse.
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