Sam finally looks up, disbelief clouding his vision. “Trust the judgement of an almost fourteen-year-old?”
“You’re only fifteen, Sam; I can’t say there is much of a difference.” Tolan wraps an arm around his shoulders, turning them both toward the stairs. “No matter her age, Vivi is a smart girl. It’s the reason you two have bonded so well.”
Sam jerks forward, almost missing a step. “Bonded? That’s the scariest word I’ve ever heard to describe our relationship.”
Tolan scoffs, knowing a bluff when he hears one. “Don’t be so sure, Sam. Sometimes irritation is an easy way to mask deeper feelings.” He looks over his shoulder, catching my eye as Ian and I trudge after them. “Don’t you agree, Brave?”
My heart catches at his question, scattered thoughts immediately flying to Aras and our prickly beginning. The beginning I wouldn’t change for anything, because it made us who we’ve grown to be. When I finally answer, I find the words to be the easiest ones I’ve said all day.
“Yes, Tolan, I most certainly do.”
Twenty-Five
The remainder of the day is a whirlwind of both joy and fear. Our families, relieved to have us back home, only suffer again at the absence of Vivi and Aras. While Mother and Papa took it the worst, King Liam and Queen Rosaline put on a strong front, believing we still hold the upper hand. They claimed Vivi would be safe, either because Aras has already found her, or because we will defeat Knox and gain her back again.
I didn’t point out that their logic failed to include Aras. If Vivi has truly gone to Knox and gotten herself into trouble, then Aras is right there with her. While Knox won’t risk harming Vivi until he knows he has my full cooperation, he wouldn’t spare a second thought about Aras. For Knox, he’s disposable—especially since Vivi broke his promise.
Throw in my upcoming marriage—Ian has yet to break the news to his parents about our change of heart—and I’ve found myself in a massive hole without the means to climb free. If I didn’t have my mother to keep me company for most of the day, holding my hand and fostering my hope, I’d have given up by now.
And I probably would have cried. If I can be thankful for anything, it’s that I’ve at least made my cousin proud.
But Mother doesn’t just have a way of keeping my spirits up, she also has a way of helping me to forgive.
“Vivi was always looking for adventure, not much different than you.” Mother works her nimble fingers through the tangles in my hair, taming them into perfection in that magical way of hers. I haven’t known her for long, but she acts as if she’s known my hair my entire life, forcing it to bend to her will and let her work be done. But maybe that’s because my wild hair matches her own. “She doesn’t always make the best decisions, but she does try to follow her heart. Even though I know you’re angry, whatever she did, she probably did it for you.”
Together, we stare out the balcony window of her chambers, watching the sun as it descends across the pink-tinted sky. We’ve been at it for hours, having left the queen’s sitting room after it was clear there was no more we could do. While Papa planned to meet with the people of Ashen and scout the woods for Vivi and Aras’ return, the two of us felt helpless… unless we wanted to comment on Queen Rosaline’s latest wedding plans.
I’d never been happier to leave a room in my life.
“I know, and that’s what makes me feel even worse. Vivi shouldn’t be trying to protect me; it should be the other way around.” I grab my mother’s hand, pulling her attention from my snarls. Her good eye shines with unshed tears, and my heart plummets even more. “I’m sorry, Mother. I should have stopped her. I knew something wasn’t right, but I ignored it anyway. How could I be angry when I know this is my fault?”
She snorts, loud and unladylike. For the first time in this suffocating palace, I feel at home. “It’s your fault Vivi decided to run off on her own days before her father is set to lay ruin to our ally? My dear daughter, sometimes your love shines so bright you forget to shade your eyes so you can truly see. Vivi has guarded your secret since she was old enough to learn it. In her eyes, every move she makes must be for the protection of you. How can you expect any less of her when it’s the same for you?”
I pull in a deep breath, fighting to let Mother’s words settle even as they threaten to swirl in my gut. She’s right, down to the very core. Why do I allow myself to be angry at Vivi for her rash decisions, when clearly, I’d make the very same ones if I thought it would save her from hurt? It’s not fair, even though I want to believe that our age difference makes it so.
“Oh, Mother. Do you sometimes wish you could have stolen us both away to live under a rock? It seems much easier than dealing with our current situation.”
Her lips part, a crooked smile painting a beautiful vision on her face. “Never. If I had to do it again, I wouldn’t change a thing. For how else would we end our world of this tyranny once and for all?” She cups my chin, the chill of her palm sending goose bumps down my limbs. “Do not worry, my love. Vivi is a smart girl, and she always has a plan. If anything, we can use this opportunity to our advantage. I think it’s time for us to let go and let the little spitfire have her way.”
I laugh, taken aback by her seeming lack of concern. But then again, we are talking about Vivi, the wild, adventurous daughter who is too old for her britches. “As much as it pains me to admit, if Vivi has a plan, I suppose we should trust it.”
She once again busies herself with my hair. Her gentle fingers move in quiet acceptance. Vivi will be fine; she always is. But I can only hope her plan also includes safe passage for Aras as well.
ↄ
The practice yard is dead at this time of night, not a single creature stirring in the dark. I wind my way down the stoned path on silent feet, the only sound the labored puffs of my breath as I struggle to gain enough fresh air. Although Mother tried to put me at ease, the palace has once again set me on edge with its empty halls and quiet rooms. Vacant and hollow—a sad remainder of my life without the two people whom I love most. My sister’s spirit spins circles in my memories, haunting me when I look for her in places she always used to be. I miss her, as if I’ve woken up to find one of my limbs has gone missing in the night. Papa used to tell me stories about men and women who had lost an arm or a leg due to terrible accidents in the past. He said that even after the limb was gone, the people claimed they could still feel it. That it would ache and burn as if it had never been detached. I believe them.
I’ve felt that very ache and burn since the moment my sister left.
But Vivi isn’t the only phantom running loose in my veins. Not when I am without my Aras. Without my other half. The last letter he wrote me sits safely in my right pocket, folded up tight and creased with my hold. Whenever I have a spare second to myself, I pull it out, careful not to tear the edges that have already become worn with my touch.
You never said yes, he wrote.
When I see him again, it’s the first thing I’ll do.
Bending beneath the low branches of the red-leafed trees outside of the palace’s stable, I push against the large, wooden door. The low light of a torch pours out against the hard dirt floor, causing my eyes to blink as the edges of the dark begin to fade away. When my vision settles, I’m more than surprised at what I see.
“You can’t go gallivanting out into the woods on your own, Sam. It’s dangerous and foolhardy to say the least.”
Sam’s shoulders stiffen, the lines of his back rigid as he prepares his horse. Ian stands to his left, his golden hair ruffled and wild even though I know he’s had a chance to clean up since he’s been home. The two lock eyes, so dead set on each other they haven’t noticed me yet. Carefully, I slide through the door, pulling it closed so it barely whispers against the frame. Lowering to my knees, I settle down beside the entrance, hoping the shadows are enough to hide me from their sight.
“You mean like you did? You’ll have to forgive me, Prince Ian, but I think the king and queen wou
ld be more upset about you leaving the grounds again than one of their lowly guards contemplating a simple mission to gather more information. You may not be worried about Vivi, but I know the kind of trouble that girl can cause. If she’s found herself in the hands of Knox, we need to know, and the sooner the better.”
Ian’s eyes flash, an icy cool building in his stare. “Why do you think Emory left? We are all worried about Vivi, Sam, but right now there is very little we can do aside from sit and wait. I know it’s hard, but we can’t lose you, too.”
“But that’s just it.” Sam grabs his bag from the floor, tying it onto the saddle with renewed vigor. “Emory left. The same Emory who cannot cross over into Orien’s lands. He will only be able to gather information from the woods, which might as well be nothing. If Vivi were in the woods, we’d know about it. She and Aras would already be on their way back.”
“Then what’s the point of leaving if you think she’s with Knox? What will your mission change?”
“The point is I’ll know if she’s all right!” Sam’s shout echoes through the stables, causing my pulse to jump. Horses whinny in the stalls, the frenzy of his tone driving them alert. Sam raises a hand to his mouth, shame dripping across his features. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have—”
“Don’t apologize, Sam. There’s no need.” Ian crosses the small space between them, hooking an arm around his shoulders. “I understand, but I do need you to be careful. If not for your own sake, then for the people of Theron. If Knox has Vivi, we don’t know what she has said. We can’t afford to make him anymore suspicious of us than he already is.”
Sam sobers, raising his chin and pulling free from Ian’s hold. “If Vivi went to Knox, she had good reason. She’s too smart to put us in danger.”
“I think that’s true,” Ian says, clapping him on the back. “But either way, I need you to stay safe.”
Sam nods, reaching for the reins to lead his horse out into the night. But he can’t go yet. Not until he’s heard from me.
“Wait!” I scramble to my feet, my hands clawing the air, desperate to catch him before he’s out of sight. The two men jump at my presence, clear surprise written in their expression, followed closely by twin looks of unease.
They think I mean to stop them, but I have more important things to say.
Reaching Sam’s side, I pull him into a tight hug, quickly forgiving him when he’s slow to return the gesture. His chest heaves against my own, and he looks down at me, wonder evident in the hanging O of his mouth. “Brave? When did you get here?”
“It’s no matter,” I rush, begging him to hear me clearly. To understand the words he needs to know the most. “Be careful, Sam. I mean it. If a single hair is harmed on your head, you’ll have to face the wrath of Vivi, and Ashen knows you don’t want that.”
A hesitant smile tugs at his mouth, and he backs away, turning to mount his horse. “Of course not.” With one last look at Ian, he clicks his tongue, moving toward the back exit of the stables until he’s swallowed up by the night.
Ian stands beside me, frozen and quiet as if he’s still unsure if I’m really there. He clears his throat, wrapping a cool arm around my shoulders as we look out into the dark. “I’m glad you let him go. We need to know where Vivi is so we can better prepare for what’s to come.”
“Let him?” I ask, quite sure Sam would have trampled me if I had tried to block the way. “For all of their dislike, Vivi and Sam are practically twins. It’s a wonder they don’t get along better.”
“Maybe they will once Vivi hears of his valiant act of bravery.”
I glance up to meet his grin. “Or else she’ll be livid when he gets caught. You know it can only be one of the two.”
He laughs, lowering his arm and bending down to pick up his pack. “True, but Sam is a smart boy. He wouldn’t do anything to put us in jeopardy.”
“You mean aside from running away to cross a cursed wood into a cursed land?” I ask, raising my brows at the pack he holds in his hands.
Doing his best to ignore my interest in the pack, he throws it over his shoulder and starts for the doors. “Sometimes the craziest decisions are the only decisions to make.”
I hurry to catch up, calling after him as he makes a break for the exit. “Like venturing off into the woods on your own without telling a soul where you went?”
He looks over his shoulder, indecision flashing in his gaze. “I didn’t go off into the woods.”
I huff, both from anger and lack of breath. “Come on, Ian. We may not be getting married, but I can still tell when you’re lying to me.”
His steps come to a halt, and he looks away, dragging a heavy hand through his unusually messy hair. When he finally turns to face me, it’s not the confident Ian that I see. “It’s a half-truth—I didn’t go out into the woods. I left out the back gates, and the person I sought came to me.”
I round up to his side, placing a steady hand on his forearm to keep him from stopping his tale. “And?”
He glances at his boots, the wall, the horses to my back, anywhere but at me. “And I sat there, and I talked. I talked about everything that’s been happening—the coming war, the marriage I once wanted, the marriage I hope to end, the parents who have always decided my future before I ever had the chance to say no. I talked about it all, and she sat there. She sat there and listened.”
He doesn’t have to say who she is; I know it from the way his pale skin turns crimson and his eyes dart away from my face. But what he doesn’t realize is I don’t think he could have chosen a better person to trust. Even if she can’t speak back.
“You think I’m foolish,” he whispers, misreading my silence for something else entirely.
I grab his hand, tugging his attention back to me. “Ian, I could never think you’re foolish, and considering my family history, I have a good handle on the subject. Honestly, I think you’re smart. Sara is one of the best listeners I’ve ever met, and that was before she was turned into a mute wolf.”
He sighs, releasing the tension building in his chest. “I suppose those who cannot speak are bound to be good listeners. When all of this is over, I’ll have to apologize. You may not think I’m a fool, but I’m sure she does.”
Squeezing his fingers, I tug him through the door and out into the open air. In the distance, the palace candles flicker through the windows, lighting our way home. A sour feeling tumbles in my gut at the thought.
If I have my way, I won’t be back here for very long. And what will become of Ian when I’m gone? I used to feel sorry for him, worry he’d never be happy and always remain alone. But now I know better. Now I think he’s found someone who will never leave.
“It seems to me that you and Sara found each other at just the right time in your lives. If I were a betting woman, I’d say she’d be even more interested in what you have to say when she can speak in return.”
Ian releases an edgy chuckle, but he doesn’t rebuke me like I expect. “Maybe you’re right, Penelope.”
“I always am,” I say.
Twenty-Six
“Are you sure you haven’t gotten into someone’s stashed spirits? I’ve never seen you so out of sorts.”
Sireen braids my hair, tight elegant links that twirl and weave across my head. The constant tugging has almost put me to sleep. Almost. And more than anything, I wish it had.
“I’m serious, Brave,” she continues, locking eyes with me in the mirror. “Is she really that intimidating?”
The she who Sireen so easily refers to happens to be Queen Rosaline, and the look I supply her in return serves as answer enough.
Yes, Sireen, she is… especially when you’re about to break the news that you won’t marry her perfect son—while we’re in the middle of a war. Excellent timing on my part.
She bites her lip, uncertainty clouding her thoughts. “But it’s not as if you’ll be alone. Ian will be there; surely he can talk some sense into his mother.”
I want to agree, yet the
fact remains that we’ve been back for two whole days and he hasn’t breathed a word of our discussion in the woods. If I hadn’t witnessed his surprising pull toward my childhood friend, I’d be inclined to believe he’s changed his mind.
As if he could feel my inner turmoil, a loud knock sounds at the door. Without waiting for permission, Ian peeks his head into the room. His normally pale cheeks have turned a ghostly white, and his tight smile speaks of the worry his words cannot form. I stand, making my way over to the door with slow, silent steps. Ian’s gaze follows my movement, taking in the dark blue tunic that seems to flow like water with every move I make. Gray, vine-like flowers crawl up the sleeves, coming together across my chest to form a blooming Silver Leith, while two gold buttons clasp the high collar at my neck.
“You look lovely,” he says, stepping into the room.
Sireen turns to busy herself with tidying up the vanity, but not without me catching the proud glow illuminating her face. She made this tunic for me while we were gone, because she said I needed something to wear that made me look strong. Something that made me look like the warrior princess I’m supposed to be.
I come to a stop by his side, wrapping my arm around his elbow when he offers to take the lead. “Lovely enough to break your mother’s heart?”
Ian peers down at me, a proud gleam shining in his eyes. “You’ve always been enough, Penelope, but today, you look as though you could take on the world and win.”
“Good, because I won’t take no for an answer. Especially after I’ve seen the way you look at Sara… and she’s not even in her human form.”
“Penelope!” Ian pulls me out the door into the empty hall, leaving Sireen behind to think what she will. “It’s not like that. I needed someone to talk to, and she always seems willing to listen.”
And she also has eyes, I want to say. There are not many women who could resist the good looks and kind heart of Ian. If it weren’t for Aras, I might find myself included.
The Reigning Star (The Orien Trilogy, Book 3) Page 14