Goddamn that gutted him.
His attention turned back to the girl, and he lifted his chin at her. “Come here, darlin’.” When she strutted over, he took a hit off his cigarette, blew the smoke out slowly and asked, “What’s your name?”
“Ashley.”
“Ashley? That’s a real pretty name.” He reached up to trace the side of her face with his index finger, a smile pulling at the corner of his mouth. Shades knew how to turn on the charm when he wanted. He knew how to work a girl, too. Show a little interest, then pretend to put them off, then reel ‘em back in. Worked every fucking time. He nodded toward the prospect standing guard duty at the back gate. The one he’d sponsored about six months ago. “You see my prospect standin’ over by the gate?”
She turned to look, and then nodded to him.
“Go bring him a sandwich and some water for me. Keep him company for a while.” She looked confused, her bright smile faltering. There were a lot of girls that wanted his attention. They seemed to single him out as one of the prizes in this club. He knew he was younger than a lot of the members, but there were other young guys. Ghost, who was a little taller and broader in the shoulder. Hammer, who had the muscular build some girls swooned over.
Shades supposed it was his face that drew the attention he received, that and the hard look that stamped his face most days. There were bigger brothers, but for some reason it was that cold hard look they all seemed to want to be the one to melt. Only one woman had ever done that. And she was across the compound. In the arms of another brother.
Ashley narrowed her eyes for a split second before catching herself and pasting the smile back on her face. Shades watched her hand lift, her own index finger moving slowly down the leather of his cut, pausing to trace the 1% diamond. His eyes followed her movement and then lifted to hers. Maybe this one he wouldn’t be so quick to toss back.
“Sure, darlin’,” she mimicked him. “What’s his name?”
A grin pulled at the corner of Shades mouth, and he reached up to grab her hand. He saw her eyes widen, probably wondering if she’d crossed a line in touching him without permission. He brought her hand to his mouth and brushed a soft kiss to the palm. His eyes moved over her shoulder and connected with Skylar’s. He could see, even across the compound, her reaction. This was probably the first time—ever—that she’d actually seen him showing attention to another woman. His eyes returned to cute little blonde Ashley, who, if he was being honest, didn’t hold a candle to Skylar’s beauty. But Skylar didn’t know that. He knew women. They were a competitive breed when it came to the attention of men.
“His name’s 12Gauge, darlin’.”
She frowned. “12Gauge?”
He grinned. “He’s good with a shotgun, babe. A 12 gauge shotgun.”
“Oh.” He watched her pretty pink mouth form a perfect circle and all kinds of thoughts crossed his mind. Lifting his chin toward his prospect, he raised a brow at her, his message clear. She’d yet to do as he’d bid her. He released her hand and grinned as she turned, moving off to do his bidding. Just like he knew she would.
Ghost shook his head as Shades lifted his beer to his mouth. “You’re something else, Brother.”
Shades eyes were on Skylar. “Why do you say that?”
“I’ve watched you pull this bit a hundred times. I’m just amazed it works for you.”
“Can’t let ‘em think you want ‘em too bad. Got a let ‘em think you could take it or leave it. Make ‘em earn it.”
“You’re so full of shit. Especially when I know and you know that the girl you really want is standing right over there.” He lifted his chin towards Skylar.
“You’re full of shit.”
“Am I? What’s the problem? She ain’t givin’ you the time of day?”
“She’s with a brother. She’s not supposed to be giving me the time of day, now is she?”
“Point taken.”
Shades eyes followed Ashley as she moved off toward the food, but they soon lost interest and returned to Skylar.
She’d taken his money. Stolen his mother’s rosary. And now she was with one of his brothers, rubbing it in his damn face, and he had to stand here and take it.
Fucking hell.
Shades had tried satisfying the emptiness losing Skylar left with booze, pussy and the club. He’d turned his frustration at having to give her up into a determination to climb the ranks of the club, but he hadn’t counted on the fact that the pull he’d felt toward Skylar had only laid dormant in him all these years. Or that all it would take to reignite it was just one look at her. And he sure as hell hadn’t counted on her showing up on the back of a brother’s bike.
Since Skylar, he’d hardened. He’d tried replacing her, tried filling the emptiness he felt with a long line of pussy. Tried sating the need she’d left him with by leaving a string of broken hearts and devastation in his wake. He never looked back at any of those women. Not once in all these years. They knew the score. He was always upfront. He never made them any promises, but he always left them satisfied. He made sure of that.
Shades drained his cup, his eyes never leaving the couple across the yard.
Butcher must have asked Skylar to give them some privacy, because Shades saw him jerk his chin toward the food tent. Crash dipped his head to her ear, whispered something, and then she stood and walked off.
Shades’ eyes tracked her as she walked up to one of the food tables and began chatting with Birdie and Cookie, two ol’ ladies that were in their mid-forties. He saw the two women smile and greet her warmly, making her feel welcome, like they did with all out of town brothers and their ol’ ladies.
From clear across the lot he could see the anything-but-welcoming glances that the younger women—Brandy, Desiree and Darla—were giving her. Shades knew enough about women to know the look of them when they were sizing up their competition.
****
Skylar had moved to the food tent when Butcher had indicated he wanted to talk with the men alone. Crash had told her to stay close and within his sight before he’d squeezed her hand and let her go. She’d greeted the two older women, Birdie and Cookie, remembering them from the old days. But now she looked across the tables at the other three women standing nearby. They were younger and new. They’d probably still been in junior high when she’d used to come up to the club. The looks they were giving her told her they were sizing her up as competition. Even though everyone knew she’d ridden in with Crash.
She took a drink of her beer and finished it off.
Birdie noticed and smiled. “If you’re headed over for another one, doll, could you bring me back one?”
“Sure, Birdie.” Skylar smiled at her and headed over to the keg with her empty red cup.
There were a couple full-patched members standing around it. Two of the big men, who had their backs to her, moved off. When they stepped out of the way she stopped short seeing Shades standing with the nozzle in his hand filling his own cup. His eyes lifted to hers, and they just looked at each other as his cup slowly filled.
Skylar broke eye contact, and to cover her nervousness she reached over to the stack of red plastic cups and pulled one off the top for Birdie. About that time, Shades finished filling his own cup and held the nozzle aloft over her cup. With a nod from her, he began filling it.
“You a two-fisted drinker these days?” he asked, a quirk of a grin pulling at his mouth.
She gave him an answering timid smile. “One’s for Birdie.”
His eyes slid past her toward the food tent, and then she watched his eyes move over to the blue canopy where Crash was sitting. She turned and glanced back to see Crash’s eyes on them. He gave her a chin lift.
Both her and Shades turned back to look at each other simultaneously, and then his eyes dropped to the cup as the beer reached the top. He let off on the lever, and she held the other cup out. He began filling it.
The silence between them was awkward. It felt so wrong to be this close t
o him and not be in each other’s arms. There were so many things she wanted to tell him. Explain. And yet this awful silence that gripped them like a vise said so much more.
She sucked her lips into her mouth almost as if she was trying to hold back the words that wanted to pour out of her. Words she could never say. Not here. Not with half the club watching.
He finished filling her second cup and hung the nozzle back on the tapper. “There you go.”
She looked down at the two cups and murmured a thank you.
He took a sip of his beer, his eyes meeting hers over the rim. And then with a glance back at Crash, he turned without a word and walked off.
****
Shades could feel her eyes on him as he walked away. He headed toward the gate where his prospect was now happily munching on a hot dog and chatting up the lovely Ashley.
Walking up quietly, with the prospect’s back toward him, Shades had the element of surprise on his side. He pounded the back of his fist into 12Gauge’s chest and growled, “You lettin’ this little girl distract you from your duties, Prospect?” At the same time 12Gauge spun around to look at him, Shades winked at the girl.
“No, Sir.” 12Gauge straighten up, coming instantly alert.
Shades hooked an arm around Ashley’s neck and pulled her close, her back to his front. His face moved to her neck, his nose rubbing along her skin, inhaling her perfume. “She smells fucking amazing, Prospect. That could be real distracting.”
At the devastated look on 12Gauge’s face, Shades smiled.
“I wouldn’t let my brothers down like that,” 12Gauge vowed.
Shades, with one arm still around the girl, grabbed a fistful of 12Gauge’s leather cut and got in his face. “Brothers? You don’t have any brothers. Nobody here is your fucking brother until you’ve got that patch on your back, Prospect! You got that?”
“Sorry, man. Slip of the tongue. I swear.” He swallowed, his eyes going to the girl, as he promised, “I won’t let her distract me, Shades.”
Shades made a disbelieving smirk and shoved him back, releasing him. “Not sure I’m believin’ that, Prospect. No, I think I best take this little temptation away. Wouldn’t want you to screw up a second time today. You better not make me sorry I sponsored you, Prospect.”
12Gauge swallowed and gave him a nod.
Shades led Ashley back to the picnic table he’d been sitting at. As he walked, he pulled her close, his eyes going over her head to find Skylar. She watched him from her place back at the food table with Birdie and the girls.
****
Skylar tried to make small talk with Birdie and Cookie for a while, but her heart wasn’t in it. The sun was setting when she finally noticed Butcher, Slick and Boot get up and move off toward the clubhouse. Crash stood, but didn’t follow them. She moved toward him, coming to a stop in front of him.
He looked down at her. “You get some food yet, squirt?”
She shook her head, looking up at him solemnly. “I was waiting for you. Aren’t you hungry?”
“Not really. Maybe later.”
“Everything okay?”
He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her to him, kissing her forehead. “I’m fine. You should eat.”
“I’m not really hungry either.”
“We’re a pair, aren’t we?”
She looked up at him sadly, and he pulled her against his chest, his chin coming down on the top of her head. She wrapped her arms around him, knowing they’d get past this sadness that consumed them. Time would eventually heal them.
Skylar’s face was turned to the side and straight in front of her, across the compound, Shades stared back at her. He sat on the top of the picnic table. The pretty blonde she’d seen him with earlier sitting between his legs on the bench below him. His hand was idly running through her hair, but his eyes remained on Skylar.
Crash bent his head to her ear. “You had enough?”
She nodded against his chest, her arms tight around him.
“Okay, baby girl. We’ll leave.”
She turned her head to look up at him. “You sure?”
“I made my appearance. Talked with who I needed to talk to. Let’s get out of here.” And then he was taking her by the hand and walking her through the crowd toward his bike.
****
Later that night, Shades lie in his bed in the apartment above his auto body shop. He stared at the ceiling and smoked a cigarette, his thoughts once again consumed by Skylar. He looked over at the clock.
3am.
He lie there. Wide awake. Wondering where Skylar was. In a bed somewhere with Crash no doubt, his arms wrapped around her sweet body. Why did he let these thoughts torture him? Twisting, he angrily jabbed out his cigarette on the rough wood floor, and then dropped the butt into an old beer can.
He leaned back, his arms folded behind his head and continued to study the ceiling. Fucking the blonde earlier tonight hadn’t even worked Skylar out of his head. He knew better than to think it would. It never had before.
Skylar.
Would he ever be free of this longing?
Memories floated through his head of that summer they’d had together.
He went back in his mind to the place where it all went off track. The night he got the call-out that changed everything between them. When he’d still been a prospect, and she’d still believed in him…
Ten years ago—
Shades let off on the throttle and coasted into the darkened alley. At 2am, it was empty.
He parked next to the only other bike there and climbed off. Dismounting, he pulled his helmet off and hung it over the handlebar.
The burning tip of a cigarette flared to life from the dark shadows against the brick wall, and then went sailing into the distance. A second later, a shadowy figure separated itself from the wall and stepped out into the dim starlight.
Cole.
The man who had called him out tonight.
He’d gotten used to these middle of the night call-outs, but they still sucked, especially when he’d left Skylar in his bed, her skin all warm and soft. It made it hard for a man to get out of bed when that was what he was leaving behind.
“Cole.” Shades greeted the man, and the hairs on the back of his neck immediately went up when Cole didn’t return his greeting, but instead pulled a black glove on as he stared Shades down. “What’s up?”
“You and me got some business.”
Shades’ eyes darted down the alley, wondering just what the fuck was about to go down. “What business is that?”
Cole approached him, flexing his gloved hand, opened, closed. Shades resisted the urge to take a step back, and instead held his ground. A moment later he was blindsided by a powerful right hook to the head. He stumbled back a step, but stayed on his feet as pain exploded in his jaw. He tried to shake the stars from his vision as he wondered what new test this was. The back of his hand came up to wipe the blood that was trailing down from his split lip. “What the fuck, Cole?”
Another fist connected with his left cheek. And then Cole grabbed two fistfuls of his cut and drove him backwards until he slammed into the side of a dumpster. Shades started to shove Cole back, but one word from the man stopped him.
“Skylar!” It came out in a snarl.
Shades eyes slid closed as he slumped back against the metal he was pinned to by one angry, pissed-off biker. “Shit.”
Cole released him with a violent shove. “That prospect cut mean anything to you?”
Shades straightened. “You know it does.”
“You were warned to stay away from her!”
Shades nodded, offering no excuse.
“You want that patch, you cut her loose. You hear me? You. Cut. Her. Loose.”
“It’s not what you think. She means something to me.”
“I don’t give a fuck, Prospect. I’m still your goddamned sponsor. I can rip that fucking prospect patch off your back. At my fucking discretion.”
“Cole, let
me explain, for Christ sake.”
“Fuck your bullshit explanations. Only two ways this is gonna go. You want that center patch, you cut her loose. You don’t, you’ll never fucking get my vote. You hear me?”
Shades spit a mouthful of blood on the ground and growled, “I hear you.”
Present day—
Shades lie in his bed, staring at the ceiling and wondering if he could go back now, would he have made a different decision that night. Would he have had the guts to rip his cut off and toss it at his sponsor’s feet? Would she have been his choice?
Cole had continued the beating that night, making sure his point was made. Shades hadn’t even fought back, knowing he deserved it for breaking the man’s trust. For lying to him. Hell, when Cole was done, Shades knew he couldn’t go home. There was no way in hell he’d be able to hide his battered face from Skylar. So he’d texted her that he had business taking him out of town and to get her own ride home. He’d avoided her all that week, partially to give his face time to heal and partially to put off doing what he knew he had to do. Break up with her. And break her fucking heart in the process.
An empty ache cut through him, and he swore to God, he’d never felt so alone. And the shit of it was, she was so close again, after all these years. So close and yet he knew, she was farther away than ever. In the arms of a goddamned brother.
Just within his grasp, and never to be in his grasp again.
Goddamn, it was like a fist squeezing his heart, squeezing the life out of him.
And he couldn’t do shit about it.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Skylar wandered out onto the porch. The last few pink slashes of sunset were fading from the sky. She found Crash sitting on the porch steps. He turned and glanced over his shoulder at her a moment before turning his quiet gaze back to the horizon. He looked so despondent and lonely sitting there.
SHADES: An Evil Dead MC Story (The Outlaw Series Book 3) Page 9