by Carol Lee
“Marissa, if it’s important to you, it’s important to me. Will you get the door?”
She ran ahead of me and opened the door so I could bring the box of journals inside more easily.
“Are you hungry, thirsty? It’s a long drive,” I said, putting the box down next to the couch.
“No, I’m good. But I need to move my legs! Let’s go for a walk somewhere before I inundate you with ideas of what might have been happening with Sarah and Jack.”
“Great. We can walk along the river.”
I could feel Marissa physically relax the longer we were outside. The way she held her body, the pace of her walking, her shoulders even, seemed to release tension she’d been holding inside. She slipped her hand into mine and I turned to see a smile on her face.
“What’s your plan from here now that your sabbatical is finished?” I asked after a long silence of enjoying each others’ company.
“I don’t know. Sarah being gone has changed what I want in life. I don’t think I want to stay in New York. I have a great community there, but it doesn’t feel like the right place for me anymore. I’ll go back for this next semester and at least finish out the year. But I might look at other jobs around New England. Or even a career change!” She finished on a laugh.
“Oh yeah? What kind of job are you thinking?”
“I’ve gotten really passionate about learning more about Sarah. So maybe something to do with counseling, or even investigative work. Something where I make a bigger impact on fewer people, you know?”
“Those would be quite the switch!”
“Well, I have time to think about it.”
“How was the winter in Ottawa?” I asked, changing the subject to keep Marissa relaxed.
“It was no worse than what I’m used to. I’m surprised you don’t have snow yet!”
“We’ve had a couple dustings, but nothing that’s been significant accumulation or that’s lasted longer than a few days. The forecast isn’t good though.”
“Snow coming?”
“A possible Nor’easter next week. Just in time to keep us homebound for Christmas.” I stopped walking and held onto her hand so she was forced to stop as well. “This was where I would go swimming in high school. There was never anyone else here—just me and my buddies,” I told her, remembering a time that I hadn’t visited for too many years.
“I had a spot like this too, over near our house. But it wasn’t as private. Everyone around would go there,” she said. Swimming holes in New Hampshire are as common as pigeons in a city.
“I loved this one because we were always alone. A few times we’d bring girls here, but usually it was just a few of us.” I put my arms around her and kissed her, happy to share this place with her today.
***
“Sam, I have to tell you something. It’s been in my mind for a while, but I haven’t said it out loud because then it’d be too real and I wouldn’t be able to take it back,” Marissa said when we were back at my house, under a blanket on the couch with steaming cups of tea to warm us up. It had gotten suddenly windy when we were on our way back and the cold was bone-chilling.
“OK,” I said, waiting for her to continue.
“I don’t think Sarah was alone when she died.”
We made eye contact and I let it sink in what she was implying. “You think she was killed?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“I’m not sure yet, but I think it was Jack. There have been too many entries about possible abuse. And the autopsy showed old bruising.”
“But that was from kickboxing,” I reminded her. I didn’t want to play devil’s advocate, or discount her love for her sister and wanting to protect her even after she was dead, but I was also being realistic and didn’t want to initiate an investigation if it wasn’t necessary.
“I know that’s what it looked like, and maybe she did do kickboxing—she never wrote about it, and I never heard about it. Judy would know, I bet. And even still, let me get you the journal entries in question. I think they’d be enough evidence to at least take another look at Jack. And his disappearance?” she continued as she got up from under the warm blanket to get the journals. She had sticky notes coming out of the ones she wanted me to look at.
“Let me read them first before we go accusing him of anything,” I said, and settled down with a pile of journals next to me.
Marissa – December 2009
I finally told him. It wasn’t as hard as I’d expected. But now it’s real. I’m dragging him into what might be a conspiracy theory with those few words—Sarah wasn’t alone.
I’m trying to stay realistic. I know he will, that’s his job. I’m probably too close. But read the journals! He’ll see what I’m talking about.
“Marissa,” he called from the couch. I was making more tea in the kitchen.
“Yeah?” I asked when I walked back in with two more steaming cups.
“I think you’re right. There was at least something going on between them that should be looked into. We can’t bring him in on murder charges for Sarah, but we can at least get a warrant to look at her medical records and find out what caused the miscarriages.”
“That’s a good start,” I agreed. The more we knew before talking to Jack, the better. “How do we do that?”
“Actually, it’s really hard to get medical records because of the HIPPA privacy laws. But maybe we won’t even need a warrant. You’re her sister, and since she’s passed away, you and Jack have legal access to those records. With Jack essentially gone, you’d be the executor, at least for now. We’ll have to find out who her doctors were.”
“I bet Judy and Krista would know. Let’s start with Krista—when is she due? Maybe it’s the same doctor.”
“She’s due in February. But she’s been on bed rest for a while. They won’t be able to come over, but we can offer to bring them dinner and go over there to talk to her. I’ll have to let Allen know we’re looking into this more. We’re not going to officially open an investigation, but having his eyes will only be helpful in the long run.”
“Perfect.” I was glad I hadn’t been creating drama from what I had read, but that it was actually there. I wasn’t crazy, Sarah had been abused and possibly killed. Now it was up to me to find out the truth and get her justice.
***
“Sam! It’s been a while!” Krista said from the couch when we walked in with vegetable lasagna the following Friday night.
“Merry Christmas!” I said in greeting.
“Merry Christmas!” she and Allen both responded, Allen taking the hot pan from my hands and putting it on the counter.
“How are you doing?” I asked Krista, taking a seat on a chair near her.
“Ready to burst! I know I still have six weeks left, but the doctors are just hoping I make it another two weeks. Twins are always early. And I hope these stick to that!”
“I hear it can get uncomfortable even with one,” I said, never having been pregnant so I could only empathize with what I’d heard, not experienced.
“I’m sure it is, but two is unbelievable!” she said laughing. “How has your visit been?”
“It’s been really good. It’s only the second time I’ve come out since Sarah died and I’m always surprised by how good it feels to be here. I don’t miss it much when I’m not here, but then coming back is like a homecoming.”
“I’ve never seen Sam so happy,” she said with a smile.
I looked away and smiled, too. I couldn’t remember the last time I was this happy with anyone.
“How long are you staying? I know you have a life in New York, but Sam had a hard time after you left last time. Allen and I have to be prepared for that!”
“Not for another couple weeks. And I don’t know how long I’ll be away. This is starting to feel more and more like it’s where I’m supposed to be. Like it’s my home. So I’m starting to think about a move, and maybe a career change. We’ll see what happens with t
he semester, though, and where jobs are available.”
“That’s exciting!”
“Yeah,” I said, nodding. “It is.” I wasn’t sure exciting was the word I would have used, but now that it’d been said, I had to agree that it was exciting. “Has Sam or Allen talked to you about one of the reasons we wanted to come over tonight?” I asked.
“You mean it wasn’t just to visit and feed me?” she said with mock surprise.
“Of course that was reason number one. But I also wanted to ask you about Sarah’s pregnancies and her relationship with Jack. Did you know he hasn’t been around here for a while?”
“I had heard that. But I thought he was just away on business more than usual. He’s always traveled quite a bit for work. That was always hard on Sarah. So I thought he was just traveling more since he didn’t have her to come home to. I don’t mean he didn’t love her, or that she was holding him back, but his priorities might have changed since she died.”
“I’m not so sure he did love her.”
“What makes you say that?”
I told her about the journals and failed pregnancies around suspicious entries.
“That doesn’t sound like him. At least, not the way I ever knew them. They might have been good at hiding any conflicts. But you can check with her doctor—it’s the same one I’m using now. Dr. Adams. I can get you her number and you could go to the office on Monday.”
“That’d be great,” I admitted and we proceeded to have a relaxing evening, me getting to know Sam’s best friends better.
***
“Good morning,” I greeted the receptionist on Monday morning. I was glad the office was empty. “I’m here about my sister, Sarah Buratto.”
“Good morning. Let me look her up,” she said and turned back to her computer. “I’m sorry, but we don’t have anyone with that last name,” she told me.
“Try Sarah Greene. Her maiden name was Buratto and I didn’t think she changed it,” I requested. Originally she hadn’t changed it, but maybe there had been reasons later on to take Jack’s last name.
“We did have a Sarah Greene. I’m sure you know this, but she passed away in September,” she told me with a look of sympathy.
“I know. I was hoping that I could have a copy of her medical records.”
“I’ll need to see ID first,” she said and I handed over my license.
She left to find Sarah’s chart and I took a seat. All of the magazines were about parenting and families. I always found that a little comical, since women looking for birth control also came here.
“Marissa,” she said and I went back up to the desk. “She didn’t indicate her maiden name when she filled out the paperwork. You’ll have to bring a copy of her birth certificate, your birth certificate and her marriage certificate before I can give you a copy. You can do all of that at the town hall.”
“Thanks. How long do you think that will take?”
“Usually it takes about a week. But with the holidays, it might be closer to two.”
“OK. I’ll see you in a couple weeks.”
I left the office only slightly discouraged, but happy that I had the time to spend here to get this straightened out.
Sam – January 2010
“Have you gotten the birth and marriage certificates yet?” I asked Marissa when I got home from work. It had been ten business days since she’d put in her requests so they should be coming any day.
“The mail hasn’t come yet, but I’m crossing my fingers they come today,” she said, looking up from the journal she was reading. “There’s more, Sam. I think we need to find Jack. I don’t know where to start with that—I don’t have access to information. Can you pull his phone records or credit card information so we at least know where he is?”
“It would take some digging, but I could look into that. We can’t bring him yet, you know.”
“I know. But what if the medical records indicate abuse that could have caused a miscarriage? Could we arrest him on charges for murder of the fetus?”
“It’d be a long shot, but we could look into it.”
“The mail!” she said, jumping out of her chair like a kid on Christmas morning. I started getting things ready for dinner and poured two glasses of wine.
“Any luck?” I asked when she came back in.
“Yes, it’s all here. I’ll go back to Dr. Adams first thing in the morning.”
“Good, until then, let’s relax,” I said and handed her a glass of wine. “Cheers.”
***
Meet me for lunch? the text from Marissa read at nine the following morning. She must have already been to Dr. Adams and wanted to talk about the medical records.
Yes—I’ll pick up something. Meet you at home. I’d rather talk about it in private.
“What’d you find?” I asked when I got home.
“It’s a lot of medical language I don’t understand, but I stayed and asked the nurse about some of it until she got busy with patients. She said, according to Sarah’s records, the first miscarriage was not attributed to any particular incident. Since she was still so early in her pregnancy, that’s not that uncommon. Especially given that our mom had so much trouble getting pregnant. But the second one seemed to be due to excessive trauma on her uterus. Sarah told Dr. Adams when she went in afterwards that she’d tripped on the deck coming into the house. I didn’t say anything, but I looked at the journal dates again, and she wrote about Jack maybe hitting her two days before she miscarried. And, she’d visited the doctor before she died. She knew she was pregnant, so Jack must have too. Can we bring him in yet?”
“Not yet. But I started looking up his phone and credit cards. He’s been all over the place, and using several different cards. He’s either in financial trouble and using them to pay the others off, or he’s trying to hide. But he’s not doing a very good job. Maybe you can go to his office this afternoon and talk to his boss or whoever will talk to you. Verify that he’s still working there. Maybe it’s all work travel. In which case, they’d know when he’ll be back, or if he’ll be back.”
“Great, I can do that. And one other thing, I don’t know why I didn’t think of this sooner. Sarah had a will. I know she did, because she’d told me one time that she’d changed me from the executor on it to Jack. That made sense, they were married. But the will was never settled.”
“That’s strange.”
“Can we make him come back to deal with that and then I can talk to him when he’s here?”
“Yeah, I can get someone working on that this afternoon.”
***
I only had one more night with Marissa. She’d been working nonstop to find out as much about Jack as she could, and I’d been helping her as much as I could without raising suspicions in the office. Only Allen knew about it so far. He was the one tracking down Jack to get him back to settle the will.
I lay down in bed next to Marissa one more time and pulled her to me. She’d been just about asleep, so her body completely relaxed as I held her in my arms, my stomach against her back. Our body heat together was almost unbearable, so I’d learned quickly to turn the heat way down at night so I could lay closer to her.
“Marissa,” I whispered, checking to see if she’d woken up when I’d come to bed.
“Mmm.”
“I want you to move in with me.”
“Sam, I have a job in New York.”
“I know. You don’t have to move in tomorrow, or even next week. But if you’re seriously considering leaving your job, I want you to move here. To this town. To my house. We’ll make it ours.”
“But what kind of work would there be here for me?”
“What if you didn’t work for a little while?”
“I like my job. Well, I liked my job until last semester. I guess I could try that.”
“Yeah?”
She rolled over to face me, her eyes looking right into mine. “Yeah. I’d like to move in with you.”
Marissa – Febr
uary 2010
It was tough leaving Sam toward the end of January. We’d both known it was coming, but the anticipation made it even worse when it came time to go back to work. I’d given myself a deadline of Valentine’s Day to put in my resignation, and today, the Wednesday before, was the day I planned to tell the department chair I would be leaving at the end of the school year.
“Dr. Rose?” I asked as I walked into my supervisor’s office.
“Marissa, how are you? I haven’t had a chance to talk with you one on one since you returned. How was your semester in Ottawa?” she asked, turning away from her computer screen and giving me her undivided attention.