by John Donne
PARADOXES
CONTENTS
I. A Defence of Womens Inconstancy.
II. That Women ought to Paint.
III. That by Discord things increase.
IV. That good is more common than euill.
V. That all things kill themselues.
VI. That it is possible to find some vertue in some Women.
VII. That Old men are more fantastique than Young.
VIII. That Nature is our worst Guide.
IX. That only Cowards dare Dye.
X. That a Wise Man is knowne by much Laughing.
XI. That the gifts of the Body are better than those of the Minde.
I. A Defence of Womens Inconstancy.
THat Women are Inconstant, I with any man confesse, but that Inconstancy is a bad quality, I against any man will maintaine: For euery thing as it is one better than another, so it it fuller of change; The Heauens themselues continually turne, the Starres moue, the Moone changeth; Fire whirleth, Aire flyeth, Water ebbs and flowes, the face of the Earth altereth her lookes, time staies not; the Colour that is most light will take most dyes: soe in Men, they that haue the most reason are the most intolerable in their designes and the darkest or most ignorant, doe seldomest change; therefore Women changing more than Men, haue also more Reason. Thye cannot be immutable like stockes, like stones, like the Earths dull Center; Gold that lyeth still, rusteth; Water, corrupteth; Aire that moueth not, poysoneth; then why should that which is the perfection of other things, be imputed to Women as the greatest imperfection? Because thereby they deceiue men. Are not your wits pleased with those iests, which coozen your expectation? You can call it Pleasure to be beguild in troubles, and in the most excellent toy in the world, you call it Treacherie: I would you had your Mistresses so constant, that they would neuer change, no not so much as their smocks, then should you see what sluttish vertue, Constancy were. Inconstancy is a most commendable and cleanly quality, and Women in this quality are farre more absolute than the Heauens, than the Starres, Moone, or any thing beneath it; for long obseruation hath pickt certainty out of their mutability. The Learned are so well acquainted with the Starrs, Signes and Planets, that they make them but Characters, to read the meaning of the Heauen in his owne forehead. Euery simple Fellow can bespeake the change of the Moone a great while beforehand: but I would faine haue the learnedst man so skilfull, as to tell when the simplest Woman meaneth to varie. Learning affords no rules to know, much less knowledge to rule the mind of a Woman: For as Philosophy teacheth us, that Light things do alwayes tend vpwards and heauy things decline downeward; Experience teacheth vs otherwise, that the disposition of a Light Woman, is to fall downe, the nature of Women being contrary to all Art and Nature. Women are like Flies, which feed among vs at our Table, or Fleas sucking our very blood, who leaue not our most retired places free from their familiarity, yet for all their fellowship will they neuer be tamed nor commanded by vs. Women are like the Sun, which is violently carried one way, yet hath a proper course contrary: so though they, by the mastery of some ouer-ruling churlish hasbands, are forced to his Byas, yet haue they a motion of their owne, which their husbands neuer know of. It is the nature of nice and fastidious minds to know things onely to be weary of them: Women by their slye changeablenesse, and pleasing doublenesse, preuent euen the mislike of those, for they can neuer be so well knowne, but that there is still more vnknowne. Euery Woman is a Science; for he that plods vpon a Woman all his life long, shall at length find himselfe short of the knowledge of her: they are borne to take downe the pride of wit, and Ambition of wisdome, making fooles wise in the aduenturing to winne them, wisemen fooles in conceit of losing their labours; witty men starke mad, being confounded with their vncertainties. Philosophers write against them for spite, not desert, that hauing attained to some knowledge in all other things, in them onely they know nothing, but are meerely ignorant: Actiu and Experienced men raile against them, because they loue in ther liuelesse & decrepit age, when all goodnesse leaues them. These enuious Libellers ballad against them, because hauing nothing in themselues able to deserue their loue, they maliciously discommend al they cannot obtaine, thinking to make men beleeue they know much, because they are able to dispraise much, and rage against Inconstancy, when they were neuer admitted into so much fauour as to bee forsaken. In mine Opinion such Men are happy that Women are Inconstant, for so may they chance to be beloued of some excellent Women (when it comes to their turne) out of their Inconstancy and mutability though not out of their owne desert. And what reason is there to clog any Woman with one Man, be he neuer so singular? Women had rather, and it is farre better and more Iudiciall to enioy all the vertues in seuerall Men, than but some of them in one, for otherwise they lose their taste, like diuerse sorts of meate minced together in one dish: and to haue all excellencies in one man (if it were possible) is Confusion and Diuersity. Now who can deny, but such as are obstinately bent to vndervalue their worth, are those that haue not soule enough to comprehend their excellency, Women being the most excellentest Creatures, in that Man is able to subiect all things else, & to grow wise in euery thing, but still persists a foole in Woman? The greatest Scholler if he once take a wife, is found so vnlearned, that must begin his Hornebooke, and all is by Inconstancy. To conclude therefore; this name of Inconstancy, which hath so much beene poisoned with slaunders, ought to be changed into variety, for the which the world is so delightfull, and a Woman for that the most delightfull thing in this world.
II. That Women ought to Paint.
FOulenesse is Lothsome: can that be so which helpes it? who forbids his beloued to gird her wast? to burnish her teeth? Or to perfume her breath? yet that the Face be more precisely regarded, it concernes more: for the secret parts needs the lesse respect; but of the Face, discouered to all Examinations and suruayes, there is not too nice a Ialousie. Nor doth it onely draw the busy eyes, but it is subject to the diuinest touch of all, to kissing, the strange and mysticall vnion of soules. If she should prostitute her selfe to a more vnworthy Man than thy selfe, how earnestly and iustly wouldst thou exclaime? that for want of this easier and ready way of repairing, to betray her body to ruine & deformity (the tyrannous Rauishers, and sodaine deflourers of all Women) what a heynous Adultery is it? What thou louest in her face is colour, and painting giues that, but thou hatest it, not because it is, but because thou knowest it. Foole, whom Ignorance makes happy, the Starres, the Sunne, the Skye whom thou admirest, alas, haue no colour, but are faire because they seeme to be coloured: if this seeming will not satisfie thee in her, thou hast good assurance of her colour, when thou seest her lay it on. If her face be painted on a Boord or Wall, thou wilt loue it, and the Boord, and the Wall: Canst thou loath it then when it speakes, smiles, and kisses, because it is painted? Are wee not more delighted with seeing Birds, Fruites, and Beasts painted than wee are with naturalls? And doe wee not with pleasure behold the painted shape of monsters and Diuells, whom true, wee durst not regard? Wee repaire the ruines of our houses, but first cold tempests warnes vs of it, and bytes vs through it; wee mend the wracke and staines of our Apparell, but first our eyes, and other bodies are offended, but by this prouidence of Women, this is preuented. If in kissing or breathing vpon her, the painting fall off, thou art angry, wilt thou bee so, if it sticke on? thou didst loue her, if thou beginnest to hate her, then ‘tis because shee is not painted. If thou wilt say now, thou didst hate her before, thou didst hate her and loue her together, be constant in something, and loue her who shewes her great loue to thee, in taking the paines to seeme louely to thee.
III. That by Discord things increase.
Nullos esse Deos inane Coelum
Affirmat Coelius, probatq; quod se
Factum vidit, dum negat hæc, beatum.
SO I asseuere this the more boldly, because while I maintaine it, and feele the Contrary repugnancies and adverse fightings of the Elements in my Body, my Body increaseth; and whilst I differ from common opinions by the Discord, the number of my Par
adoxes increaseth. All the rich benefits we can frame to our selues in Concord, is but an Euen conseruation of things; in which Euennesse wee can expect no change, no motion; therefore no increase or augmentation, which is a member of Motion. And if this vnitie and peace can giue increase to things, how mightily is discord and warre to that purpose, which are indeed the onely ordinary Parents of Peace. Discord is neuer so barren that it affords no fruit; for the fall of one estate is at the worst the inceaser of another, because it is as impossible to find a discommodity without aduantage, as to find Corruption without Generation: But it is the Nature and Office of Concord to preserue onely, which property when it leaues, it differs from it selfe, which is the greatest discord of all. All victories & Emperies gayned by warre, and all Iudiciall decidings of doubts in peace, I doe claime children of Discord. And who can deny but Controuersies in Religion are growne greater by discord, and not the Controuersie, but Religion it selfe: For in a troubled misery Men are alwaies more Religious than in a secure peace. The number of good men, the onely charitable nourishers of Concord, wee see is thinne, and daily melts and waines; but of bad discording it is infinite, & growes hourely. Wee are ascertained of all Disputable doubts onely by arguing and differing in Opinion, and if formall disputation (which is but a painted, counterfeit, and dissembled discord) can worke vs this benefit, what shall not a full and maine discord accomplish? Truly me thinkes I owe a deuotion, yea a sacrifice to discord, forecasting that Ball vpon Ida, and for all that businesse of Troy, whom ruin’d I admire more than Babylon, Rome, or Quinzay, remoued Corners, not only fufilled with her fame, but with Citties and Thrones planted by her Fugitiues. Lastly, betweene Cowardice and dispaire, Valour is gendred; and so the Discord of Extreames begets all vertues, but of the like things there is no issue without a miracle:
Uxor pessima, pessimus maritus
Miror tam malè conuenire.
He wonders that betweene two so like, there could be any discord, yet perchance for all this Discord there was nere the lesse Increase.
IV. That good is more common than euill.
I Haue not beene so pittifully tired with any vanity, as with silly old Mens exclaiming against these times, and extolling their owne: Alas! they betray themselues, for if the times bee changed, their manners haue changed them. But their senses are to pleasures, as sicke Mens tastes are to Liquors; for indeed no new thing is done in the world; all things are what, and as they were, and Good is as euer it was, more plenteous, and must of necessity bee more common than Euill, because it hath this for nature and perfection to bee common. It makes Loue to all Natures, all, all affect it. So that in the Worlds early Infancy, there was a time when nothing was Euill, but if this World shall suffer dotage in the extreamest Crookednesse thereof, there shalbe no time when nothing shall bee good. It dares appeare and spread, and glister in the World, but Euill buries it selfe in the night and darkenesse, and is chastised and suppressed when Good is cherished and rewarded. And as Imbroderers, Lapidaries, and other Artisans, can by all things adorne their workes; for by adding better things, the better they shew in Lust and in Eminency; so Good doth not onely prostrate her Amiablenesse to all, but refuses no end, no not of her vtter contrary Euill, that she may bee the more common to vs. For Euill manners are Parents of good Lawes; and in euery Euill there is an excellency, which (in common speech) we call good. For the fashions of habits, for our mouing in gestures, for phrases in our speech, wee say they were good as long as they were vsed, that is, as long as they were common; and wee eate, wee walke, onely when it is, or seemes, good to doe so. All faire, all profitable, all vertuous, is good, and these three things I thinke embrace all things, but their vtter contraries; of which also faire may be rich and vertuous; poore, may bee vertuous and faire; vitious, may be faire and rich; so that Good hath this good meanes to be co[m]mon, that some subiects she can possesse entirely; and in subiects poysoned with Euill, she can humbly stoope to accompany the Euill. And of Indifferent things many things are become perfectly good by being Common, as Customes by vse are made binding Lawes. But I remember nothing that is therefore ill, because it is Common, but Women, of whom also; They that are most Common, are the best of that Occupation they professe.
V. That all things kill themselues.
TO affect, yea to effect their owne death, all liuing things are importun’d, not by Nature onely which perfects them, but by Art and Education, which perfects her. Plants quickened and inhabited by the most vnworthy soule, which therefore neither will nor worke, affect an end, a perfection, a death; this they spend their spirits to attaine, this attained, they languish & wither. And by how much more they are by mans Industry warm’d, and cherished, and pampered; so much the more early they climbe to this perfection, this death. And if amongst Men not to defend be to kill, what a haynous selfe-murther is it, not to defend it selfe. This defence because Beasts neglect, they kill themselues, because they exceed vs in number, strength, and a lawlesse liberty: yea, of Horses and other beasts, they that inherit most courage by being bred of gallantest parents, and by Artificiall nursing are bettered, will runne to their owne deaths, neither sollicited by spurres which they need not, nor by honour which they apprehend not. If then the valiant kill himselfe, who can excuse the coward? Or how shall Man bee free from this, since the first Man taught vs this, except we cannot kill our selues, because he kill’d vs all. Yet lest something should repaire this Common ruine, wee daily kill our bodies with surfets, and our minds with Anguishes. Of our powers, remembring kills our memory; Of Affections, Lusting our lust; of vertues, Giuing kills Liberality. And if these things kill themselues, they doe it in their best and supreme perfection: for after perfection immediately followes excesse, which changeth the natures & the names, and makes them not the same things. If then the best things kill themselues soonest, (for no Affection endures, and all things labour to this perfection) all trauell to their owne death, yea the frame of the whole World, if it were possible for God to be idle, yet because it began, must dye. Then in this idlenesse imagined in God, what could kill the World but it selfe, since out of it, nothing is?
VI. That it is possible to find some vertue in some Women.
Am not of that fear’d Impudence that I dare defend Women, or pronounce them good; yet wee see Physitians allow some vertue in euery poyson. Alas! why should we except Women? since certainly, they are good for Physicke at least, so as some wine is good for a feauer. And though they be the Occasioners of many sinnes, they are also the Punishers and Reuengers of the same sinnes: For I haue seldome seene one which consumes his substance and body upon them, escape diseases, or beggery; and this is their Iustice. And if suum cuiq; dare, bee the fulfilling of all Ciuill Iustice, they are most iust, for they deny that which is theirs to no man.
Tanquam non liceat puellanegat.
And who may doubt of great wisdome, in them, that doth but obserue with how labour and cunning our Iusticers and other dispensers of the Lawes study to imbrace them: and how zealously our Preachers dehort men from them, only by vrging their subtilties, and policies, and wisdome, which are in them? Or who can deny them a good measure of Fortitude, if he co[n]sider how valiant men they haue ouerthrowne, & being themselues ouerthrown how much, and how patiently they beare? And though they be most intemperate I care not, for I vndertooke to furnish them with some vertue, not with all. Necessity, which makes euen bad things good, preuailes also for them, for wee must say of them, as of some sharpe pinching Lawes; If men were free from infirmities, they were needlesse. These or none must serue for reasons, and it is my great happinesse that Examples proue not rules, for to confirme this Opinion, the World yeelds not one Example.
VII. That Old men are more fantastique than Young.
WHO reades this Paradoxe but thinks me more Fantastike now, than I was yesterday, when I did not thinke thus: And if one day make this sensible change in men, what will the burthen of many yeares? To bee fantastique in young men is conceiptfull distemperature, and a witty madnesse; but in old men, whose se
nses are withered, it becomes naturall, therefore more full and perfect. For as when we sleepe our fancy is most strong; so it is in Age, which is a slumber of the deepesleepe of death. They taxe vs of Inconstancy, which in themselues young they allowed; so that reproouing that which they did reprooue, their Inconstancy exceedeth ours, because they haue changed once more than wee. Yea, they are more idly busied in conceited Apparell than wee; for we, when we are Melancholy, wee are blacke; when lusty, Greene; when forsaken, Tawney; pleasing our owne inward affections, leauing them to others indifferent; but they presecribe lawes, and constraine the Noble, the Scholler, the Merchant, and all Estates to a certaine habit. The Old men of our time haue changed with patience their owne bodies, much of their lawes, much of their languages; yea their Religion, yet they accuse vs. To be amorous is proper and naturall in a Yong man, but in an old man most fantastike. And that ridling humour of Iealousie, which seekes and would not find, which requires and repents his knowledge, is in them most common, yet most fantastike. Yea, that which falls neuer in young men, is in them most fantastike and naturall, that is, Couetousnesse; euen at their iourneyes end to make great prouision. Is any habit of young men so fantastike, as in the hottest seasons to be double-gowned or hooded like our Elders? Or seemes it so ridiculous to weare long haire, as to weare none. Truly, as among the Philosophers, the Skeptike, which doubts all, was more contentious, than either the Dogmatike which affirmes, or Academike which denyes all; so are these vncertaine Elders, which both calls them fantastike which follow others inuentions, and them also which are led by their owne humorous suggestion, more fantastike than other.