by Allie Able
“I'm going to stay until Grant and Summer leave.”
He nods his head and pull me closer.
“Want me to drive you home?”
I pick my head up and look at him. “Can you just stay with me and that way you can drop me by here in the morning?”
His jaw gets tight, but he nods his head. “Yep. That's fine.”
I tilt my head to the side and study his face. “Are you sure? You're acting weird.”
He rolls his eyes and shakes his head. “Yes, I'm sure. I know you love sleepovers,” he laughs.
I just like him staying at my house. I feel safe with him there, but I'm not going to tell him that. He would wonder why I don't feel safe and I don't want to deal with him freaking out over nothing.
“Come on, the party is dying down. Let's get another drink and mingle. We can go home soon,” he says taking my hand and leading me off of the dance floor.
Chapter Two
Zack
I LEAD LEXIE TO THE bar and order us both another drink. I'm going to need the extra alcohol if I'm sleeping in Lexie's bed tonight. I don't stay over at her house much anymore, but it happens often enough that I know I won't be on the couch. Sleeping next to her warm body and knowing that I can't act on my feelings is a special kind of torture.
I have been in love with Lexie Sinclaire since I was ten years old. I've tried to date several times, but none of the others came close to her, and yet she has never noticed. Maybe it's my fault for never telling her how I feel, but I'm scared to death that she will pull away. I would rather keep her as my best friend than risk finding out that she doesn't feel the same way.
I've watched her date guys who I knew weren't good enough for her, but I’ve always kept my mouth shut: I don't want to tell her how to live her life, but I know we could be incredible together and I don't know how much longer I can keep my feelings a secret.
The truth is, I'm a twenty-eight-year-old virgin.
I know what you're thinking, but hear me out. I've kissed girls and I've done other things, but I've never gone all the way with a woman. I am reserving all of that for Lexie; I am not going to hand it over to another woman. She is it for me, and I've known that since I was just a kid.
I haven't dated much in recent years and Katie is actually the only woman I've spent time with in a long time. I think part of me knew she was emotionally unavailable so there was no danger of it going very far. I know I need to act on my feeling towards Lexie, but I'm just not sure how to do that after all of this time. I almost told her when she asked me about getting married, but I'm glad I didn't. I think that conversation needs to be had in private.
“What in the hell are you thinking about?” Lexie asks, pulling me out of my thoughts.
I smile and shake my head. “Nothing.”
“Oh, bullshit.”
I laugh and take a sip of my beer. I see Grant and Summer saying their goodbyes as everyone starts making their way to the front of the house.
“Do you need to stay for clean-up?” I ask.
She shakes her head. “No. We are going to do that tomorrow. Want to help?”
“Sure. I can stay when I drop you off in the morning.”
“Come on. Let’s go say our goodbyes.” She sets her wine glass down and takes my hand.
I've always loved how comfortable she is with me. Maybe it's because of how long we've been friends, I don't know, but I've seen the looks her boyfriends in the past have given me and I didn't care one bit. Lexie is mine, whether she knows it or not. I just need to grow some balls and tell her how I feel, and that's easier said than done.
After saying goodbye to Summer and Grant, I lead Lexie around to my truck and help her inside.
“What time do we need to be back in the morning?” I ask, as I crank the truck up and pull out of the driveway.
“Not until around 11:00 am. Summer hired a few people to come help, but since her and Grant are leaving early, I've got to come let everyone inside.”
I nod my head and look over at her. She has her head laid back against the seat and is looking in my direction.
“What's wrong?” I ask, looking back at the road.
“Nothing. I'm just tired,” she responds, quietly.
I catch something in her tone, but don't question her about it.
It's not long before I'm pulling into her driveway. We both get out and make our way up her front steps and into the house.
“Do you want anything to drink?” she asks.
“I'll grab us some water and meet you in your room.” I say, walking towards her kitchen.
She nods her head and disappears down the hallway. I sigh and run my hands through my hair. I give her enough time to change, before making my way to her bedroom.
I look around and smile to myself as I set her glass on the bedside table. It's been a while since I've been in here, but nothing ever changes. Lexie is a girly girl and always has been. Her sheets are pink with flowers on them. She has about hundred pillows on her bed, most of which she doesn't even use. There’s a vanity in the corner, with makeup covering every inch of it. I like to think of her bedroom as controlled chaos. There is shit everywhere, but she obviously knows where everything is.
I pull my shirt over my head, right as Lexie comes out of the bathroom. Like usual, she is wearing an over-sized t-shirt and panties. I look closer at the shirt and laugh.
“Is that mine?”
She smiles as she pulls a few pillows off of the bed and tosses them onto the bench at the end.
“Yep. You left it at my house one time when you came to visit when I was still living in Virginia. I wear it to bed most of the time.”
I snort and shake my head. “I bet Jared loved that.”
She stills for second at the mention of her ex-boyfriend. It wouldn't have been noticeable if I hadn’t been looking directly at her, but I am.
“What was that?” I ask, watching as she climbs into bed and lays on her side facing me.
“Nothing,” she mumbles.
“It was something,” I respond. I kick my shoes off and start unbuckling my belt, but continue to watch her closely.
“Is it weird that we sleep together?” she asks.
I finish taking my pants off and crawl into the bed. I lay on my side and study her face.
“Do you think it's weird?” I ask, carefully.
Hell yeah, it’s weird. We are two grown adults who have sleepovers. We don't sleep in the same bed when we are dating someone, out of respect for the other people, but I'm in love with her and she has no fucking clue. So yeah, I would say that our odd relationship is pretty fucking weird, but I'm not telling her that.
She shrugs her shoulders and scoots closer to me. “I don't know. We've been doing it since we were kids. Jared knew that you and I had slept in the same bed a lot and he hated it.”
“Really?” I ask. I honestly didn't know she had told her ex about that, but I did know that the guy hated me because the feeling was mutual.
She nods her head. “Yeah, he always accused me of cheating on him with you.”
I roll my eyes. No matter how strange our friendship is, Lexie is not a cheater and never will be.
“Is that why you guys broke up?”
Lexie's never told me why she moved back home. I'm thrilled that she's back again, but it bothers me that she would never tell me why.
She shrugs her shoulders and scoots over a little more until she is tucked against my chest and her leg is thrown over mine. My arm immediately comes around her waist, as I pull her closer against me.
“I don't want to talk about it right now,” she mumbles.
I sigh and give her tiny waist a squeeze. “Okay, Angel, but soon I want to hear about what happened,” I respond, quietly.
She nods her head in response, before burying her face in my neck.
Fuck.
I shift my hips away from her, so she won't feel my growing hard-on. There is no way I'm going to get to sleep like this. She wraps
one arm around my waist and tries to pull me closer, but I won't budge.
“Why did you move away,” she says, quietly.
I clear my throat and shake my head. Nope, not going there with her. This certainly isn't the first time I've gotten an erection when I've been around Lexie, but it's pretty damn hard to hide it when her panty covered pussy is so close to my crotch.
She wraps her leg tighter around me and I know she can feel me. I rest my hand on her waist and still her movements, but it's too late. Our lower bodies are lined up perfectly.
“Angel, stop moving,” I say in a rough voice.
She doesn't say anything for a moment, but she doesn't move away. What feels like an eternity later, she lifts her head and looks at me. “Is your dick hard?”
I groan and close my eyes. “Jesus, Lexie.”
“What? It's just a question.”
“One that's not needed, since I know you can feel it.”
Her laugh comes out deeper than usual and I finally open my eyes to look at her. She is smiling at me, with a strange look in her eyes.
“See, you have boundary issues,” I say, with a shake of my head.
“It's not the first time you've been hard around me,” she says, rolling her eyes.
“Jesus fucking Christ,” I groan. “It's just a natural reaction to having a woman so close to me. Go to sleep.” I tuck her head back into my neck and she laughs lightly.
She’s quiet for a second and I almost think she's gone to sleep, until she asks a question that I have no fucking clue how to answer.
“Does that happen with other woman then?”
I think I stop breathing for a second. How am I supposed to answer that? I clear my throat and kiss the top of her head. “I've never slept in bed with another woman.” I hope that my non-answer will be enough.
She nods her head and scoots closer again, causing my dick to jump. There is no way in hell I'm going to be able to sleep.
“I've never slept like this with another man. I actually hate it when someone tries to cuddle me while I sleep.”
My eyebrows scrunch together in confusion. “No you don't. This is how we always sleep.”
She's quiet for a second, almost like she choosing her words carefully. She kisses my chest lightly, before laying her head down.
“Only you.”
I suck in a breath, but I don't respond.
Just when I thought we couldn't get any weirder, she proves me wrong.
It's not long before Lexie's breathing evens out and I know she's asleep.
I lay awake thinking of all of the different ways I could tell her that I'm in love with her. I think of every scenario that could possibly happen once my secret is out and I still don't know what to do. I've got to tell her soon because either way I have to move on with my life. I love her, but I can't keep living like this. I just hope she knows how amazing we could be, if she would just open her eyes and see what's right here in front of her.
It's time.
I kiss the top of her head and pull her closer to me, before drifting off to sleep.
Chapter Three
Lexie
I OPEN MY EYES AND try to blink the sleep away. I can smell coffee and it takes me a second to remember that Zack is here. I smile and bury myself deeper into the covers. I always sleep the best when he's here. I wasn't lying last night when I said that I've never been much of a cuddler. I actually hate to be touched when I'm sleeping, but it's different with Zack. I can't imagine sleeping in the bed with him and not touching.
I hear his footsteps coming down the hall and he walks into my bedroom, setting a cup of coffee on my bedside table.
“Wake up, sleepy head.”
I shake my head and smile. “No, I'm warm.”
He chuckles. “It's July in South Carolina. I'm pretty sure it's warm everywhere.”
I throw the covers back and sit up in the bed cross-legged.
“What's on the agenda today?” I ask, reaching over to grab my coffee.
He laughs and sits down on the edge of the bed and I watch as he brings his coffee cup up to his mouth, taking a drink before responding. “Well, we have the clean up at Grant and Summer's house. How long do you think that will take?”
“Probably two hours max.”
He nods his head. “Okay. Do you have to open the bakery today?”
“No, Summer closed for the weekend. I'm free until tomorrow morning.”
“Okay. After cleanup how about we grab some lunch and go to the beach?”
“Sounds fantastic,” I smile.
I never learned how to surf. My body just won't move like that, but I love watching Zack move through the waves.
“Breakfast?”
My stomach lets out a growl in response and we both laugh.
“You get dressed and meet me in the kitchen. We'll eat and then head over to my house so I can change.”
I nod my head and move to get off of the bed. After setting my coffee down, I give Zack a kiss on the cheek. “Thanks for staying with me last night.”
“Anytime,” he says with a smile.
I grab my swim suit out of my drawer and start making my way towards the bathroom. Zack is still sitting on the bed and he looks deep in thought.
“Angel,” he says, as I open the bathroom door.
I turn to look at him and raise my eyebrow in question.
“I need to talk to you about something tonight,” he says quietly.
“That sounds ominous.” I release a nervous laugh.
He studies my face and shakes his head. “No. It's nothing bad,” he assures me.
Part of me doesn't believe him. His face looks so serious, but I nod my head. It's time to tell him about Jared anyway. We can kill two birds with one stone or however that damn saying goes.
* * *
I take a bite of my sandwich and watch Zack as he sits on his surf board bobbing in the water. After I got changed and we ate breakfast, we headed over to Grant and Summer's house where the workers were already waiting for us. It only took us about an hour to clean up and get everything squared away. I’d offered to look after Duke, Summer’s monster of a dog, while her and Grant are away, so we brought him back to mine—along with Lady, Zack’s dog, so they could play together—before finally heading to the beach.
Since it's July and tourist season, most of the beaches are packed, but we are locals, so we know the best spots to go. I look around and see a few families playing, but it's nothing like what the main strip looks like. Tourists season really helps our small town, but I just can't stand the overwhelming amount of people it brings.
I see a huge wave coming and I hold my breath as Zack starts paddling. This part always makes me nervous. When I was a little girl, I would close my eyes, until I knew they were standing. I don't do that now though. I watch as he pulls his big body up and stands. He cuts left and then right as he rides the wave. Right as the it crashes, he wipes out.
I keep holding my breath, until I see his head pop up and he turns to look me with a huge smile. I roll my eyes and shake my head as I take another bite of my sandwich. I'm surprised he hasn't given me a heart attack over the years. I love the ocean, but I also respect it. I know how quickly an undercurrent can suck you out of sight.
Zack shakes his head and tosses his hair to the side, trying to get some of the water out of it, as he walks towards me. He sticks his surf board up in the sand, before plopping down beside me.
“Want to come get in the water?” he asks, while digging through the cooler for a drink.
“Yep. I'm burning up. I need to put some more sunscreen on first, though,” I say shoving the last bite of my sandwich into my mouth.
He looks over at me and snorts. “You are so lady like.”
I swallow and take a sip of his water as I nod my head. “I know.”
He laughs and reaches over for the sunscreen that's laying on my towel. “Your back is getting pink.”
I scoot closer to him and turn so that my b
ack is facing him. “Lather it on, Zacky.”
“Stop it,” he says with a laugh.
His hands are cool from the water and I shiver when he touches my hot back. “Is the water cold today?” I ask.
He clears his throat and I feel his hands move under the string of my bathing suit, as he spreads the sunscreen.
“A little chilly, but it feels good,” he responds.
I nod my head, but don't say anything.
Why do his hands feel so good?
Is it because I haven't been touched by a man in a long time? Zack has put sunscreen on me a hundreds of times before, but for some reason this time I'm focusing on how his hands are moving slowly across my back. He moves lower and I arch into his touch.
What in the hell is happening right now?
Why am I getting turned on?
He moves his hands away and clears his throat. “I think you're good, Angel.”
I dumbly nod my head and turn to face him. “Do you need some on your back?”
Is that my voice?
Why do I sound like that?
Without looking at me, he nods his head and passes me the bottle. He turns so that I can see his back and I can't help but admire the tattoo he has there. On his right shoulder blade sits one of the most intricate tattoos I've ever seen. It's bright and colorful and it's done in a white outline that makes it pop against his dark skin. A clock explodes and the pieces of it are scattered everywhere. I asked him once what it meant and he just smiled and shrugged his shoulders.
I run my fingers across it, feeling the raised skin and finally squirt the sunscreen in my hand, before rubbing it on his back. God, he's so big. He was so tiny when we were kids, but somewhere between high school and college, he filled out. He still goes to the gym five times a week and I guess working out is even more important now that he is going into the fire academy.
I run my hands down his back and feel his muscles tighten under my touch and I swear I have to squeeze my legs together to try and relieve the ache.
What are you doing Lexie? This is your best friend for Christ Sakes, snap out of it!
I mentally berate myself as I move my hands away from him and stand up.