by Chant, Zoe
“Of course you can! The Horse Hope Rescue Instagram is on the verge of going viral.”
Another glance. This one was a very annoying How cute, the kid thinks she can do an adult job but we know better type of look.
“I’m serious,” Raelynn protested.
“I know,” said Judy. “And Everly’s been a huge help too. But… Well, we’ll see.” On a scale of hopefulness, that “We’ll see” rated about a three. On a scale of ten.
They left Black Flame the usual armful of hay, then Dad drove Judy back to Welcome Inn.
The instant the truck was out of earshot, Dad said, “I want to talk to you.”
Alarmed and confused, she said, “But Black Flame’s doing better! You said so yourself! We just have to be patient, like Judy said.”
“Rae, this isn’t about Black Flame.”
“It isn’t?” She relaxed. “I can pull up my history grade on the final, I swear.”
“What’s wrong with your history grade? Are you dreaming about Black Flame instead of studying?”
Realizing that she had fallen into a trap of her own making, she hastily said, “No, it’s just boring. Potatoes and taxes and men with beards. And nothing’s wrong with my grade. Much. Like I said, I’ll pull it up on the final. What did you want to talk about?”
The look Dad gave her was serious enough to make her uneasy. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but Judy and I like each other. A lot.”
“Yeah, of course I’ve noticed,” she began, then realized what he mean. “Ohhh. You mean a lot, a lot. Are you worried I’ll get all weird and angry like teenagers on TV get when their parents date, and start screaming that she’s trying to replace mom? I promise I won’t. You and mom haven’t been together since I was three. I’m glad you and Judy are a lot. I like her. Normally I’d say I like her a lot, except you made a lot mean something else, so… I think she’s great and I like having her around.” A thought occurred to Raelynn. “Is she moving in with us? Is that what this is about?”
“No. Well—maybe in the future. Probably in the future. How would you feel about that?”
“She’d share your bathroom, not mine, right?”
“Right.”
In fact, Raelynn had been hoping Judy would stick around. She hadn’t been specifically hoping she’d stick as close as inside their home or as her step-mom, but when she considered those possibilities, they didn’t seem horrible. The time they’d spent together taming Black Flame and eating in the backyard and playing with Bruiser and talking about her horses had been nice. Better than nice. Judy felt like family. Raelynn would rather have her a little too close than a lot too far away. Still, she felt that as a teenager, she had to put up some token protest.
“I won’t call her Mom,” she warned her father. “Just Judy.”
“Your mom is always going to be your mom,” Dad said gently. “And I’m sure Judy is fine with being Judy.”
Trying to sound magnanimous, Raelynn said, “In that case, I think I could adjust.”
“Good.” Dad patted her shoulder. “And if you’re weird and angry sometimes, that’s okay.”
She gave a snort like a horse. She’d learned it from Black Flame.
“Well—I’m glad we had this talk,” Dad said. “But it’s going way ahead of what I meant to talk about. Judy doesn’t know I’m a shifter. She doesn’t even know shifters exist. And I want to tell her.”
“Well, of course,” Raelynn began. Then her mind leaped ahead of her words. In a sudden, hideous flash, she understood the purpose of the entire conversation. “No! If you tell her you’re a bear shifter, then she’s going to ask you whether you got bitten by a werebear, and you’ll tell her no, it’s genetic and you were born like that, and then she’ll say, ‘Oh, so Rae’s a bear too,’ and then you’ll say, ‘Well technically yes, but she’s a failbear. Can’t control her shift. Such a horrible, humiliating, awful—”
Dad had been trying to break in from “failbear,” but at that point he spoke loudly enough to drown her out. “Rae! You are not a failure. You shouldn’t be embarrassed—”
Her voice rose to match his. “But I am! And I don’t want Judy to know! She thinks I’m this cool girl who tamed a hellhorse. I don’t want her to know I’m the loser bear who’s thirteen and can’t do what other bears could do when they were in kindergarten!”
“You’re going to learn to control your animal,” Dad said firmly. “You’re a little older than the average bear, but—”
“I’m WAY older than average, and I’ll NEVER learn!” Raelynn yelled. If she shouted loud enough, it might stop her from crying. “And you promised you’d never tell anyone about me shifting unless I said it was okay.”
“You will learn,” Dad said. “And a promise is a promise. I won’t tell anyone you’re a shifter unless you say I can.”
“Great!” She sniffed hard. “So tell Judy you’re a shifter, and if she asks about me, tell her it skipped a generation and I’m not.”
“I can’t lie to her. How about if I tell her about myself, and if she asks about you, I’ll say that whether you’re a shifter or not is private.”
“Then she’ll know there’s something horribly wrong with me, or you could just say whether or not I’m a shifter. She’ll probably think I turn into a giant blob made of bear parts that don’t fit together right, or when I shift I go crazy and try to murder people and you have to chain me in the basement, or—”
“We don’t have a basement.”
Raelynn knew he was making a joke to try to lighten up the conversation, but it only made her more panicked and ashamed. She shouted over him, “Or she’ll think I turn into an animal that can’t think like a human, and she’ll be right!”
They’d reached home without her even noticing. Dad parked the truck and turned off the engine. Tears were running down her face. She hadn’t even noticed when she’d started crying.
He hugged her, murmuring, “Rae, Rae, everyone’s got something about them that isn’t perfect and they’re embarrassed about. Especially when they’re your age.”
“You didn’t,” she sniffled.
“I had terrible acne,” he said. “I have scars on my face from it. It’s why I grew a beard originally, to hide them.”
She hadn’t known that, and looked up curiously. “I don’t see them. Are they where the beard covers?”
He shook his head. “Look close. See, on my cheeks?”
“No.”
“Those little raised white flecks?”
“Oh… I never noticed.”
“That’s what this bear thing is going to be someday. It’ll be something in your past that’s over. Something you have to tell people about, or they’ll never know.”
She didn’t believe him, but she didn’t want to keep talking about it. “Well, I don’t want Judy to know now. If you tell her you’re a bear and she asks if I am too, just say look sad and change the subject, and she’ll assume I’m not one either.”
Dad gave her a look. “Lying by implication is still lying. I can tell her that’s not mine to say and if she’s curious she can ask you. Whatever happens then is up to you.”
“Ugh, I don’t want to lie to her either,” Raelynn blurted out before realizing the trap she’d fallen into. “Look, just don’t tell her you’re a bear, and then it’ll never occur to her that I might be one too, and then none of us have to lie.”
Dad rubbed his head like it ached. “I have to tell her about myself eventually. We were just talking about her moving in with us.”
Raelynn knew he was right. But the thought of Judy learning her dark secret made her panicky. “Well, don’t tell her yet, all right? I want her to keep on believing I’m cool for a little while longer.”
“Judy will still believe you’re cool. She’s not going to care at all about this. Think about it, Rae. She’s not a shifter. She doesn’t know about shifter prejudices. She’ll just be sad that it upsets you.”
“You promised,” Raelynn insisted. “Yo
u promised you’d never tell anyone I’m a shifter unless I said it was okay. And telling by implication is still telling. Promise me you won’t break your promise.”
Dad sighed, but said, “I promise.”
Chapter Ten
Waylon was woken up by rain. It fell on his face in a gentle, lukewarm patter.
Still half-asleep, he thought, I could’ve sworn I went to sleep in my own bed last night. Why would I have turned into a bear and sacked out in the woods?
Then, only one-quarter asleep, he thought, I didn’t. The roof is leaking. Leaking like hell.
One hundred percent awake, he shot bolt upright. Raelynn leaped backward, still clutching the dripping sponge she’d been holding over his face. Bruiser jumped off the bed and began to bark wildly.
“Raelynn Frances Brody!” Waylon bellowed. “What have I told you about pouring water on my face when I’m asleep?”
Unrepentant, Rae said, “It was a last resort. I shook you and shook you first.”
Waylon suspected her of trying one gentle shake that his sleeping mind had mistaken for Bruiser bumping into him, but the utter glee on her face distracted him from further scolding. “What’s going on?”
“We have to visit Judy. Right now.”
“Why?”
Rae’s grin almost split her face. “Look at this.”
Twenty minutes later, they were knocking on the door of her room at the Welcome Inn. Waylon had insisted that they call up first, but it turned out that Judy had already been awake.
She opened the door, her puzzled gaze shifting between them. “What’s going on?”
“LOOK.” Rae thrust her phone at Judy. As she took it, both Rae and Waylon watched her face, waiting to see her reaction.
Judy looked down at the screen that Rae had shown him earlier. It was the Horse Hope Rescue GoFundMe. “I don’t…”
“Look at the money,” said Waylon.
Her eyes flicked to the side, and her jaw dropped. “What? That can’t be right!”
“IT IS,” said Rae.
Father and daughter were united in delight as they watched first disbelief, then joy come over Judy’s face. Waylon hadn’t realized quite how much stress she’d been under until he watched it fall away. Her eyes sparkled, her spine straightened, and brightness pervaded her entire being.
“That’s enough,” she marveled. “It’s more than enough. But how…?”
“You went viral,” said Rae.
“Rae did it,” Waylon said proudly. “I had nothing to do with it. She did it all herself, just like she said she would.”
“The Instagram campaign?” Judy asked.
“Yep!” Raelynn too was glowing with happiness. “Want to see?”
“Of course!”
Rae took back her phone and held it so both Judy and Waylon could see.
“She showed me the GoFundMe but not the Instagram,” Waylon explained. “She wanted it to be a surprise.”
“TA-DA!” Rae held up the phone and showed them the first photo.
Waylon and Judy were standing close together so they could both see the phone, and he felt as well as heard her sharp intake of breath. He too was astonished.
There on Instagram, for all the world to see, was a photograph of Black Flame.
After his first instant of shock, Waylon realized that there was no fire or sparks in the picture. To anyone who didn’t know Black Flame was a hellhorse, he would look like nothing more—or less—than a particularly beautiful black colt. His coat was midnight-black against a backdrop of blue sky, and his mane and tail blew in the wind. His ears were cocked forward, and his bright eyes gazed straight at the viewer.
“It’s a wonderful photo,” said Judy. “I had no idea you had such a good sense of composition.”
“I had a wonderful inspiration,” said Rae, soaking up Judy’s praise like a sponge soaks up water to drip on a sleeping dad’s face. “Now read the text!”
Judy read aloud, “This magnificent black colt, Black Flame, is a rescue horse located in La Puerta. Judy Rosenberg is making great progress taming him, but he needs other horses to socialize him. Click here to contribute to the GoFundMe to send her herd of rescue horses to join Black Flame. Be the one small flame that joins with many others to create a forest fire of generosity that will warm Black Flame’s lonely heart.”
For a moment all three of them stood in silence, looking at the photo of Black Flame. Waylon could see why it had gone viral. The colt had obviously been watching Rae as she photographed him, and the bond he had with her was visible in the picture. But more than that, so was the love Rae felt for the colt. You couldn’t look at the photo without loving Black Flame too.
“It’s great, Rae,” said Waylon. He was so moved that he could only repeat, “Really great.”
It wasn’t that Rae had saved Horse Hope Ranch; she had, but the work he and Judy had been doing in La Puerta would have done the job eventually, if more slowly and less spectacularly. It wasn’t even that Raelynn had revealed an unexpected talent.
It was that she had cared. She had tried. She had done her absolute best, for Black Flame and for Judy’s horses whom she’d never met and for Judy herself. And for Waylon, too, whom she knew loved Judy and wanted to make it possible for her to stay.
And Judy was sharing his emotions. He could feel it in the air, palpable as a summer breeze. They both loved Rae and were proud of her. Judy would never be Mom like Waylon was Dad, but she didn’t have to be. She loved Rae and Rae loved her, and that was exactly what all of them needed.
And then the three of them were caught up in a group hug, spinning each other around and laughing.
We’re a family, Waylon thought, half-dazed with joy. He knew they had a long way to go, but in the most important respect, they’d already arrived.
Chapter Eleven
“The horses are here!” Raelynn sang out. “Sixteen pretty, pretty little horsies! And two donkeys! And a mule!”
Judy, overseeing the trailers pull up to the ranch that was now the new home of Horse Hope Rescue, said over her shoulder, “Don’t let Curstaidh hear you call her a pretty little horsie. She’ll bite you.”
Beside her, his burly form a comforting warmth, Waylon said, “I’ve come prepared for Curstaidh.” He brandished a pair of heavy leather gloves fit for the Viking warrior that he resembled.
“Good idea,” said Judy.
“Black Flame will be so happy,” said Raelynn. “He’s watching from the forest.”
Judy couldn’t see hide nor hair of him, but she was sure Raelynn was right. Her bond with the hellcolt was like that. She didn’t have to see him to know.
Soon Judy had her hands full unloading her horses. Waylon was right beside her, calming them and leading them into their stalls. She’d already seen his skill with horses, as they’d both been working with Black Flame and she’d sometimes accompanied him when he treated horses around La Puerta, but it felt different to see him work with her horses.
It’s a special kind of intimacy, she thought, even as she patted and gentled the horses. So many different kinds of love in one place, all connected like a web. Man and woman, parent and child, human and animal, all working together to make sure everyone feels loved and safe in their new home.
And yet for all that love, there was something about it that felt fragile and unfinished. Waylon still hadn’t told her his secret. She trusted him that it was nothing terrible, but it nagged at her. Until she knew, she couldn’t completely trust her newfound happiness. Especially since it was Raelynn’s secret, too. If Raelynn didn’t trust her enough to tell her something that was clearly so important, what did that say about Judy’s fitness as a not-quite-mom? Would that secret, whatever the hell it was, become the crack that widened and widened until it broke their family apart?
“She’s beautiful,” said Waylon, startling her out of her reverie. They were alone in a stall with Katrina, the alpha mare of the herd. A ray of afternoon sunlight came through a window and turned her bl
ack on white spotted coat to black on gold. “And so are you.”
He bent to kiss her, and her apprehensions dissolved in the passion and sweetness of his kiss. She clung to him, melting into the heat of his mouth and the strength of his arms around her. In that moment, she had absolute faith that together, they would conquer all obstacles. She didn’t know how, but the press of his body against hers told her that somehow, they would be the lovers and family that they were meant to be.
“I love you,” he said. His voice was husky and quiet in the golden-lit stable. “I’ve loved you ever since I first met you. I didn’t want to scare you off by saying it too soon.”
“I love you too,” she replied. “And I don’t scare easily.”
“I know.” Waylon’s smile was brighter than the sunlight. “That’s one of the many reasons why I love you.”
“Ma’am!” The shout came from outside the stable. “We’re having some trouble with the Shetland pony!”
“I’ll be right there!” Judy called back.
Waylon accompanied her outside. Judy was utterly unsurprised to see the people who had delivered the herd in trailers standing around looking frustrated. Raelynn was talking in her best horse-coaxing voice, but Curstaidh was not coming out.
“I can fetch Katrina,” Judy said. “Curstaidh will follow her when she won’t obey anyone else.”
“Let me try first.” Waylon put on his leather gloves and stepped into the trailer. Judy and Raelynn followed him.
The shaggy chestnut pony stood obstinately in the back of the trailer, her flaxen mane completely covering her eyes. Waylon approached, speaking soothingly.
“Careful,” Judy said. “She likes to—”
Curstaidh spun around and lashed out with her hind leg, kicking surprisingly high for such a small pony. Her hoof connected with Waylon’s groin with a crack like a branch breaking.
Waylon let out a grunt and staggered backward. “Right in the nards!”
“Did she break something?” Judy asked anxiously, even though she knew the question made no sense. What was there to break in that area?