Bitzer patted Shaun’s hoof. With a quiet whuff, he pointed at the wheelbarrow and then towards the farmhouse. The car is gone. The Farmer has gone on holiday, Bitzer whuffed. Shaun would be much more comfy in the Farmer’s bed, and the Farmer would never know.
Nodding eagerly, Shaun sat up straight. A real bed! With the Farmer’s teddy, and proper pillows, and soft blankets and … and … a television, and a DVD player, and a bathroom with a plastic shower cap and rubber ducks… His prank was working better than he could ever have imagined. Realizing he was grinning from ear to ear, he quickly flopped back, groaning.
Two minutes later, dressed in a clean pair of the Farmer’s pyjamas and hugging his teddy, Shaun settled into bed with a sigh of happiness. The pillows were softer than marshmallows. Bitzer carried in the television and set it up at the end of the bed while Shaun looked through a selection of DVDs, trying to choose between a fast-paced action movie called Blazing Tractors 6: Fields of Fury and a documentary about sheds.
It was an easy choice. Shaun settled back with the remote control in one hoof and watched as a handsome farmer, sucking on a blade of grass, drove a tractor through fields of flame to rescue a trapped sheep. Bitzer, meanwhile, wheeled in a trolley loaded with drinks, sandwiches, cake and ice cream. Then he closed the curtains and switched off the light before tiptoeing away.
Glued to the screen, Shaun ate until his stomach groaned. Soon, cake and ice cream were smeared across the bedcovers. As the credits rolled, he picked up a cheese-and-pickle sandwich and used it to mop up some spilled lemonade, then tucked the sandwich under the pillow for later. With a happy sigh, he snuggled deeper.
This was the best prank ever. With the Farmer on holiday, days of comfort rolled out ahead of him. He yawned. When Bitzer returned from his chores, Shaun would send him to the shops for a copy of Blazing Tractors 7: Apocalypse Plough. In the meantime, the bed was soft and he was full of food. As the credits finished, the screen went black. The bedroom was plunged into darkness. Yawning again, Shaun felt his eyelids droop…
Shaun dreamed.
In his dream, Bitzer came into the room, grumbling about appointments that didn’t exist and arguments with the dentist. Bitzer kicked his shoes off. For a moment, Shaun thought he might be awake, but then he remembered that Bitzer didn’t wear shoes, or mumble about teeth. Dreams could be crazy, he told himself as he drifted off into sleep again. The bed springs squeaked. A weight on the bed made Shaun roll over. He reached out and snuggled the Farmer’s teddy. In his dream, it was bigger than he remembered, and extra cuddly. With a bleat of happiness, he pulled it closer, slobbering into its ear.
The teddy shrieked.
Shaun bleated crossly. With one hoof, he grabbed a pillow and whacked the noisy teddy with it. That would calm it down.
The teddy yelled, angrily.
Somewhere deep in Shaun’s sleepy mind, a thought flickered. Teddies didn’t shout, did they? They especially didn’t shout things like, “GaahhffumminARRGH-EEEEP!”
He opened his eyes just as the lights switched on.
For a second, Shaun sat blinking in bed, surrounded by DVD boxes and crumbs and smears of cake icing. He must be still asleep, he told himself, because on the other side of the room – standing by the door with a murderous look on his face – was the Farmer.
But the Farmer was on holiday, wasn’t he? Certain that he was still dreaming, Shaun stared. The Farmer’s glasses were askew, and they had half a cheese-and-pickle sandwich caught in them. Shaun grinned to himself. It was a very strange dream. It must have been the cheese, he thought. Cheese always gave him odd dreams.
The Farmer stared back, his face becoming redder and redder and then going a vivid shade of purple. Shaun watched with interest and helped himself to another slice of cake.
The explosion was … well … explosive.
In the farmyard outside, Bitzer winced as the bedroom curtains blew out on a roar of “HragerrooooyaaaaarrrrrGH!” Cake and sandwiches followed, together with frightened bleats and the sounds of an alarm clock hitting the wall and pictures smashing. Less than a second later, Shaun shot out of the kitchen door, still wearing stripy pyjamas and trailing bandages as he ran, bleating, down the road. The Farmer followed in hot pursuit.
Heads appeared over the wall as the animals of Mossy Bottom Farm stopped whatever they were doing to stare open-mouthed. Humming to himself, Bitzer leaned on the gate and watched Shaun disappear over the hill with the Farmer three steps behind. He smiled, brightly. Shaun’s leg was looking a lot better, he told himself. All it had needed all along was some healthy exercise, like a nice long run.
CHAPTER TEN:
THE LAST
LAUGH
Stars twinkled down on Mossy Bottom Farm as Bitzer ticked the last chicken off his checklist and wandered back towards his kennel. By the meadow gate, he heard a whispered bleat. He stopped, and Shaun’s head emerged from behind a bush. Was it safe?
Tucking his clipboard under one arm, Bitzer glanced up at the Farmer’s bedroom window. Silhouetted against the curtains, the Farmer pushed a vacuum cleaner round the room. With a whuff, Bitzer nodded at Shaun. The coast was clear.
Looking sheepish, Shaun shuffled over, his hooves behind his back and his head hung. He gave Bitzer a low bleat of apology and tried a grin. Were they still friends?
Bitzer frowned, then whuffed seriously. The pranks would have to stop. Forever. He never wanted to see another prank again.
Shuffling from hoof to hoof, Shaun nodded eagerly. The pranks had gone too far. He would never prank Bitzer again.
Bitzer held out a paw. If the pranks stopped, they could still be friends.
Shaun shook the sheepdog by the paw and bleated happily. With a sweet smile, he pointed to a large flower he was wearing on his chest. Would Bitzer like a sniff?
Bitzer’s eyes widened. It was a large and exotic-looking bloom. He had never seen anything like it before. Leaning over, he took a long sniff…
Squeezing a rubber bulb hidden in his fleece, Shaun gave the gullible sheepdog a face full of water. And for the second time that day, Shaun ran for it.
This time, he was laughing.
ACTIVITIES
TOP PRANKS
1. SICKENING SPOONFUL
Carefully clean out a mayonnaise jar once it has been used up. Put some vanilla pudding or yoghurt into the jar instead. Then make sure someone is watching when you proceed to spoon it up and eat it.
2. BIG FOOT
Stuff wads of toilet paper into someone else’s shoes. When they go to put them on, watch as they wonder whether the shoes have shrunk, or whether their feet have grown!
3. HUNGRY LOOKS
Get a pack of googly eyes from a craft store. Apply those little eyes to everything in the refrigerator, so the next time someone opens the door to look for a snack, they’ll find a crowd looking right back!
4. A SOLID BREAKFAST
Prepare a bowl* of cereal with milk, then freeze it overnight. Don’t forget to leave in the spoon. Then offer the bowl to someone for breakfast, and sit back to watch your victim’s confusion and surprise…
*Use a plastic bowl, if possible, or one that has “freezer safe” written on the underside. Ceramic, porcelain or glass bowls might crack as the milk freezes.
YOU’VE BEEN
PRANKED!
Someone has played a trick, scrambling all the letters of each word on this shopping list!
Can you work out what the correct items are? Write them below.
HOW TO DRAW
A MOUSE
This mouse has been known to cause mischief in several of the Tales from Mossy Bottom Farm books.
Learn how to draw him, so he can cause trouble all over!
STEP 1 Start with this shape.
STEP 2 Add a circle and two lines. This will be his snout.
STEP 3 Now add small feet, two dots for eyes, and a smile line.
STEP 4 Draw tall loops for ears, and a rectangle for his front teeth.
STEP 5 Draw a line to make two teeth, then add whiskers, arms and a spiral for a tail. Ta-da!
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or, if real, are used fictitiously. All statements, activities, stunts, descriptions, information and material of any kind contained herein are included for entertainment purposes only and should not be relied on for accuracy or replicated as they may result in injury.
First published 2016 by Walker Entertainment,
an imprint of Walker Books Ltd, 87 Vauxhall Walk, London SE11 5HJ
Written by Martin Howard and illustrated by Andy Janes © and TM Aardman Animations Limited 2016. All rights reserved. Shaun the Sheep (word mark) and the character Shaun the Sheep are trademarks used under licence from Aardman Animations Limited.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, transmitted, or stored in an information retrieval system in any form or by any means, graphic, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, taping and recording, without prior written permission from the publisher.
British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data:
a catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library
ISBN 978-1-4063-6956-4 (ePub)
www.walker.co.uk
Pranks a Lot! Page 3