Blessed: A Bad Priest Romance

by Alexis Angel

  "I didn’t know you spoke French," I say.

  Thomas shrugs. "My country is on the border between Germany and France. We are all fully bilingual. I'm fluent in French and German, and thanks to my education here, English."

  I laugh. "That’s impressive. I can barely speak English properly."

  I look at Thomas. He isn't laughing with me. Instead, his eyes are soft, his face gentle. He looks at me like he hasn't seen me before. I fight the urge to squirm.

  "Why are you looking at me like that?" I ask.

  "Tu es la femme la plus belle au monde, il n'y a pas de mots pour le dire." He lifts his hand and touches my face. His fingers are sure on my skin. I shiver. "You're the most beautiful woman in the world. There are no words to describe it."

  I melt. Everything about Thomas is magical. Every time we spent time together, it just becomes more so.

  "You can’t keep doing this to me," I say to him.

  He frowns, taking his hand away. I feel the absence of his fingers on my skin acutely.

  "What?" he asks.

  I shake my head. "You can’t keep flooring me with all this flattery and beautiful gifts. I can’t keep up. Right now, you’re the most romantic person I’ve ever seen."

  Thomas laughs. "I can’t help it," he says. "If you had any idea how you make me feel, you’d understand. Let me show you how you look in my eyes."

  Thomas turns his head to me. He leans in toward me. I tip up my head and meet him halfway when he kisses me. His kiss is something I crave now, and his passions are something I miss when I'm not with him.

  The kiss is warm and insistent. Thomas lifts his hand and puts it on my cheek. When he holds me like that, I feel delicate and petite. He makes me feel as beautiful as he keeps saying I am. His kisses me eagerly, his tongue slipping into my mouth like he is tasting me.

  There are people all around us, and I don't care. Let them look and see what real passion looks like. Right here, right now, I'm exactly where I want to be, doing what I want to do.

  When Thomas finally breaks the kiss, I put my head on his shoulder and wrap my arm around his body. He puts his arm around my shoulders, and we drive through the rest of Central Park like that, hand in hand, arm in arm.

  Will I end up sleeping with Thomas? A part of me shouts yes. Another part still isn't sure. I've been holding back for so long, I'm not sure if I'll take that step. But if this isn't enough to get me to sleep with a guy, what the hell will it take? Lisa has told me so many times that it isn't a big deal, that I just needed to get my virginity out of the way and enjoy myself.

  I look at Thomas. He doesn't know yet that I'm a virgin. Will I tell him? Will we get that far? I know what I feel for him, but I don't know if I can act on it.

  If it were up to him, we would've slept together that first night.

  I'm not sure what will happen between us in the future. I don't know what we will become, or how a long-term relationship works. I don't even know if this is something that can happen.

  What I d know is that right now, I'm deliriously happy.

  Thomas

  We go back to her apartment after our carriage ride through the park. The last time I was here, we’d gotten dangerously close to sex, and she’d asked me to leave. She’d told me that she hadn’t kicked me out, but it had felt that way.

  Our relationship has progressed despite the minor setback, and I'm starting to believe her that it isn't a full rejection.

  It's different between us this time. She's more open toward me. Even though we've had so little time together, I feel like I know her a lot better. Normally, I hop right into the sack with women. No waiting. No drawn-out romance. Just instant, animal lust.

  But Nicole is forcing me to wait. By doing so, something strange is beginning to happen. She's becoming more than just an object of pleasure or someone to pursue. I'm really starting to like this girl. I don't want to sleep with her for the sake of getting another notch on my bed post, either. This is becoming more than that.

  I want to be with her for her, not just for sex. I also want her for sex, but it isn't just to throw one in her and move on with my life. Sex with Nicole feels like it would be the culmination of something bigger.

  "What do you want to do?" she asks.

  I blink at her. God, I can think of something I'd like to do. I flash on the image of her naked breasts that have been burned into my mind. Just thinking about it gets me hot and bothered. I swallow and lick my lips.

  I don’t know what my face shows–maybe a little of what I feel–but she looks uncomfortable. I don't want that with her at all. I want her to be as comfortable around me as we’ve been until now. It's the only reason I don't press her to get physical. Obviously, she doesn't want that. It's almost like she is afraid. When things finally happen between us, and it will happen, I want her to want it, too.

  "Let’s watch a movie," I say, opting for something innocent and nonthreatening. It's a sign of how much I like her. If most girls held back the way she does, I'd just head on home, or out to a bar at this point. When it comes to sex, I'm not a patient man. But for some reason, Nicole is different.

  She breathes out, as if in relief, and walks to the TV stand. She reaches for a stack of DVDs on the shelf and hands them to me to choose one. I go through them.

  "This is not a usual selection," I say.

  She shrugs. "I don’t like the type of stuff that everyone else watches."

  I nod. Different. Everything about her is like that. I read the back of the DVD covers, trying to decide what to watch. I haven't even heard of most of them. Her eyes are on me as I sort through them. I'm aware of her stare.

  I finally settle on one called Le Concert. It's as good as any other, considering I’ve never heard of it and have no idea what to expect.

  "This is a good one," she says, taking it from me. "It has a lot of French in it as well. With your apparent language skills, you won’t even need to read the subtitles."

  I chuckle. I haven't told her much about myself. The French just poured out of me in the park. It's a language of love, and it always helps to impress women.

  I walk to her open plan kitchen. "Do you want coffee?" I ask.

  "Please." She fiddles with the remote, putting on the DVD while I make coffee in the kitchen. I rummage through her cupboards, trying to find coffee and sugar. I knew where the cups were after my first night here.

  When she has the movie ready and the coffee is made, I walk back to the living room and hand her a cup. I sit down next to her. She moves against me, pressing her body against mine. This is a surprise, although a pleasing one. It feels like a big step for her to make physical contact with me now so easily.

  In the beginning, she’d held back so much. As difficult as it was for me to take things slowly with her, it's clearly working. I need to let her make the first moves. It isn't easy for me, considering it's so different from the way I do things with every other girl. But that's Nicole in a nutshell. She is different. Better. Worth it.

  I sip my coffee and stretch my arm out on the couch behind her. I want to put my arm around her shoulders and pull her close to me, but not yet. I'll wait just a little, until the movie has been running for a while.

  I like being with her. Lately, everything is different. I want to spend time with her, going on dates that are different or just spending time together doing nothing at all. I want to get to know her as a person. I can't remember feeling like this with anyone else.

  I'm starting to fall for her. That has to be it. Out of all the girls I’ve been with, she has changed me. The worst part is the timing. I know it isn't supposed to be this way. I'm leaving in fourteen days. All I have left are two weeks. I can't just forget about her, though. I want to spend every possible minute with her that I have left.

  When I leave, I'll get over it. I'll get over her. Right now, and until that happens, I won't even think about it.

  The movie is interesting, but I can't focus. When I finish my coffee and her cup is empty
on the table, I put my arm around her shoulders and pull her closer against me. Her body is warm. I rub her shoulder with my hand and kiss her hair.

  She looks up at me, tilting her face so I can kiss her on the mouth. I don't waste any time taking the opportunity.

  She kisses me with abandon. It's nothing like before. She’d been so careful and hesitant before this. This time, it's as if she’s just waiting for me to make a move. She turns toward me, shifting on the seat. I put my hand on her cheek and kiss her deeply. The kiss turns from gentle to urgent quite quickly. Our lips mash against each other, almost like we're making up for lost time. She's breathing hard. My sex throbs in my pants, eager for release. I don't know if it's going to come, though. I don't want to get my hopes up too much. I want to savor whatever happens between us, and not be disappointed because things didn’t work out like I wished they would.

  "God, Nicole, I want you," I say against her lips. Maybe it's too much, telling her that I want her. It wouldn’t be too much for other girls. Hell, it's fairly tame compared to what I’d normally say. But Nicole is different. She's delicate. One rough touch, and she’ll pull away from me. She'll reject me again.

  I want her to know, though, and this is the lightest touch I can use. I want to be with her. I want all of her, not just the little bit she’s been giving me until now.

  She hesitates just a moment before kissing me again. The urgency returns, and I'm relieved.

  Nicole breaks the kiss and looks at me. Her eyes are the color of slate, deep and dark, not pale as they usually are. She swallows. She's breathing hard.

  "I have to talk to you," she says.

  My stomach tightens. When women stop kissing for a sentence like that, it's never good. I nod and loosen my grip on her. She doesn't move away from me. It's a good sign.

  "What is it?" I ask.

  She looks nervous. She won't make eye contact with me. She twists her fingers around each other in a way that can't be comfortable. I will her to get it out, but she hesitates.

  "You’re driving me crazy, here," I say. The sentence has a double meaning to it. I just want her, and she keeps stopping me. The added suspense is about as much as I can handle.

  "Okay," she starts. "I know that we haven’t really seen that much of each other. I mean, compared to some other people who know each other for a long time." She takes a deep breath. "Even though we haven’t spent that much time together, I feel like… well, we know each other. You know?"

  I nod. I feel it, too. I keep quiet, waiting for her to keep talking. If I fill the silence, she might never unburden herself with whatever is bothering her.

  "I guess, well, what I’m trying to say to you… I like you. I mean, I really do. I’m starting to fall for you."

  She says the last part of her sentence fast, like getting it over quickly will make it easier.

  A smile spreads slowly over my face. I brush her hair out of her face and trace her profile with my fingertips.

  "You scared me there," I say. "I thought you were going to kick me out of the house again."

  She shakes her head. "I didn’t kick you out. I didn’t mean it like that."

  "I’m joking," I say softly. "Relax."

  She blows out her breath in a shudder. I think back to Jessica, who had told me without any introduction that she loved me. It had been so easy for her to throw out the words. It had been hard for Nicole. It makes me feel like it's real with her, like she means it.

  "I feel the same about you, by the way," I say. "I mean, it hasn’t been very long, but it’s different with you. I’ve noticed that. It means something to me."

  That isn't a confession of love, right? I definitely am not ready for that. I want her to know, though, that she means something to me. More than anyone else has. And her feelings are important to me.

  When I look her in the eye, she's smiling at me.

  "It means something to me, too," she says.

  I lean forward and kiss her again. "Do you trust me?" I ask.

  Nicole blinks at me. She hesitates only a second before she nods. I get up and hold out a hand. She takes it, and I lead her to the bedroom. She follows me, even when she knows what I'm going to do.

  Her bedroom is small but full of life and character, just like her. A pile of clothes in the corner suggests she's behind on her laundry, which she does herself like a normal person. She has ornaments and photos on a shelf opposite the bed. The double bed has a colorful duvet over it, and so many pillows, she can't possibly use all of them to sleep with.

  I sit down on the bed and guide her to do the same. She looks nervous, but she sits beside me.

  I lean forward and kiss her again. She allows me in, opening her mouth. I kiss her for a while before I slide my hand down to her chest like I had before. She's wearing a soft-checkered shirt, and I feel the lines of her bra beneath my fingers. She gasps when I massage her breast. Her hand slides up my thigh without encouragement, and she touches me.

  She's making moves herself. This is a good sign. Maybe this time, things will be different.

  I unbutton her shirt, and she lets it fall off her shoulders. I reach behind her back and unclasp her bra. In the dusky atmosphere of her room, she lets me touch her and look at her and explore her. I go slower than I did last time. I don't want her to clam up on me again.

  I pull off my own shirt so we're both topless again. I pull her backward with me so we both lie down, and I unbutton her pants. We've come this far before. I hope we can go further. Nicole seems almost eager to let me take control and lead her further than we’d been before.

  I kiss her and press my body against hers, grinding my hips against hers. I can't help it. My body aches for hers, and it's impossible to hold back. I push my hands into her pants, working them down over her hips. She wears a thong. The sight of it is sexy as hell. I groan when her pants are low enough for me to have easy access.

  "Thomas," she says, pulling away from me a little bit.

  "What is it?" I ask. "Too much?" She's going to reject me again, isn't she?

  She shakes her head. "I’ve never done this."

  I frown. "Never done what?"

  She takes a deep breath. "This. Sex."

  I blink at her. "You’ve never had sex before?"

  She shakes her head. She looks shy and embarrassed. I try to wrap my head around what she's saying. She's the most beautiful, sexiest person I know. How is it that no man has ever claimed her in some way or another?

  "You’re a virgin?" I ask, incredulous. When she looks at me, her eyes are large and shimmering. I think back to all the times I had hoped it would lead somewhere and she rejected me, how slow she’d been to open up to me physically, how she always seemed closed down and shy. It all makes sense now.

  "I want to do this, though," she says.

  I shiver. She's offering me her virginity. Aside from the fact that it's a huge thing for her to do, it's a major turn on. There is nothing as hot as taking a woman’s virginity.

  "It will be okay," I say. "I’ll be gentle. Trust me."

  I'm more than eager to get in there. I want to devour her. This new bit of knowledge makes me ache for her, but I will do it slowly. It's her first time. I'll give her the devotion she deserves.

  I pull her against me and kiss her. Hard.

  Nicole

  His reaction is better than I hoped for. I half-expect him to laugh at me. Or to scoff at my innocence. Or something. Instead, Thomas looks like he's glad I told him. He still wants me.

  And I want him. I know that I decided never to have sex until I was in love, but if I want to give myself to anyone, it's Thomas. Something about him makes me feel safe and cared for, even now.

  When he kisses me again, it's with an urgency I haven't experienced with him before. He asks me to trust him, and I do. He promises he'll be gentle with me, and I believe that he'll do his best to take care of me.

  Even though we haven't met that long ago, I care enough about him to do this and trust him enough to feel
like he won't hurt me. My instincts tell me this is right, and I decide to follow those instincts and see where they lead me.

  Thomas spends a lot of time kissing me again and running his hands over my body. My shirt and bra are off, and I'm practically naked with my pants so far down my legs. But I don't want to cover up again. I want him to see me. The way he looks at me makes me feel like there is something to look at. He makes me feel beautiful. I want him to know that I think he's attractive, too. That he's handsome, irresistible.

  I reach down and unbutton his pants. I push my hands into his underwear again, the way I had before and wrap my fingers around him. Thomas groans. With my other hand, I pull his pants down a little at the front to give me more room.

  If I'm going to do this, I want to do it properly.

  Tell me what you like, Nicole," he says softly.

  "What do you mean?" My stomach drops, confused by his question.

  "I know you haven’t done… it. But, when you have, you know… come, what did you like?" He explains his question.

  Staring at him blankly, I swallow hard, unable how I should answer his question. I’ve never even had an orgasm, so how can I tell him how to please me? Oh gosh, are you supposed to know that? I’ve never even gotten this far with a guy, so I’m completely lost.

  "You’ve never…?" He trails off, looking at me with disbelief in his eyes.

  "No," my voice is barely above a whisper. I see the breath escape him and my heart stops as his head drops. This is it, he’s going to want to leave knowing how inexperienced I am, I can feel it. But when he raises his face back to mine, there’s a shadow of a smirk on his face and I think there could still be a chance that we could go on with this, which excites me because my body is raging.

  "What have you done?" he asks, tilting his head like he’s studying me.

  "What we’ve done. This is the furthest I’ve ever gone," I admit shyly, and this time I’m sure he’s smirking.