by Jana Janeway
Emotions flip-flopped between grateful and annoyed. His motives were simple, and completely without malice, but that didn’t stop the frustration she felt from finding its way into her tone. “We have enough lying going on around us, from outside sources, without us doing it to each other! And as honorable as your intentions might have been, that’s not the kind of relationship I want with you.”
“It’s not the kind of relationship I want with you, either.” His faintly spoken words and sincere remorse squashed what was left of her anger.
“I don’t need you to mollycoddle me. I just need you to love me.”
“I do love you.”
She nodded in acceptance. “I know. I love you, too.”
Reaching over, she placed her hand on his arm, needing that physical connection, and fell silent as her thoughts wandered. He knew the question she was contemplating asking, but he waited for her to actually voice it before answering. Nearly a minute later, she did.
“What do we do now?”
His inner struggle was almost tangible; his desire to protect her was battling against being honest with her. The wall was finally down.
“I don’t think there’s much we can do.” He felt her despair kick in before he even fully answered her. It was exactly what he had been afraid of. The helplessness was suffocating. Affection and reassuring words weren’t going to make it better this time.
Tears welled as they turned onto the dirt road, and then fell as the house, which felt more and more like a prison every day, came into view.
“Is it really so bad?” he asked, after parking the car, cutting the engine, and turning to face her. “We have each other, a beautiful home, friends who live a stone’s throw away… They give us everything we need. We want for nothing—”
“Except for freedom.” She swiped her tears from off her cheeks, and he sighed as he hung his head. “You can’t fix this, Craddock,” she responded to his thoughts, “and I’m not expecting you to. I know this isn’t your fault.” She pushed out her door and headed up the walkway.
“Shit,” he whispered, hesitating for only a moment before exiting the vehicle, following her. He waited for her to key into the house and step inside before pulling her into his arms. “I know it’s not the best of circumstances,” his tone was soft, gentle, “but it’s not the worst, either. Here, they’ll protect us. Here, we’re safe.”
“I know that,” she conceded, “and that’s at least something, but living like this for the next… what? Hundred and fifty years or more?” Knowing she wasn’t looking for an answer, he only held her tighter in response. “The only thing getting me through this last year was you, and the knowledge that we would be allowed to leave some day.”
“We still might be allowed to.” He squeezed his eyes shut tight when he felt her agitation rising again.
“For the love of God, Craddock, stop!” Leaving his arms, she marched towards their room, with him directly behind her. “If they were going to, they would have done it already! Especially with today being the one year anniversary!”
“What do you want me to do?” he asked of her, pleading. “Tell me what you want me to do.”
Seeing the pain in his eyes, feeling it emanating from him, she sighed as she dropped herself onto their bed, her gaze finding the floor. “I don’t blame you, Craddock. Don’t think that way.”
Slowly, he approached and sat beside her. “I’m not blaming myself for what they’re doing. I’m blaming myself for not knowing how to help you. What good is Chimie, if I can feel you but can’t help you?”
She scoffed. “Are you kidding me? Craddock, you have been helping me! I would’ve died here, without you and your help!”
“All I did was prolong the inevitable, by lying to you and distracting you.” He flung himself back onto the bed with a groan.
“Maybe,” she fell beside him, “but you also held me when I cried, and made me laugh when I was down, and listened patiently while I vented—”
“And told you everything was going to be okay, when clearly, everything is not.”
She kissed his cheek, then shifting positions, settled herself in on her side of the bed. “Why are they even doing this? Why won’t they let us leave, do you think?”
Moving to join her, he draped his arm over and across her, snuggling in. “I have no idea. ‘Cause they can?”
The irritation in his tone was unmistakable, as was the exhaustion he was fighting off.
Much of the last three weeks had been spent lying awake at night, watching her sleep, unable to himself due to worry and his constantly racing thoughts. It was the only time of day where he could think on the dilemma he knew was coming, since the wall he put up for her benefit prevented him from being able to do so freely.
With everything finally out in the open, the lack of rest was catching up with him now. He clenched his jaw to stop the yawn, but even if she hadn’t seen him do so, she would have known. Her mothering instincts immediately kicked in.
“Nap time.” She kissed his lips softly but quickly before moving to leave the bed.
“What? Why?” He watched without assisting or hindering as she started untying and removing his shoes.
“Because you’re exhausted, that’s why.” With a gesture of her pointed finger, she ordered him to get under the covers.
“No I’m not,” he lied; she just gave him an incredulous head tilt in response. “Okay, I am. But I don’t need a nap.” He pushed into a sitting position, attempting to stand, but the moment he was vertical, she placed her hand on his chest and shoved him back down.
“This isn’t a negotiation.” Her tone was stern but playful. “Sleep. I’ll wake you when it’s time for dinner.” She gestured once again for him to climb under the covers.
Complying, he smirked up at her as she tucked him in. “Shouldn’t this be the other way around?” He reached out, touching her abdomen gently. “I should be ordering you to rest.”
“When I stop sleeping at night, you can.” She kissed his forehead before heading for the door to leave.
“Baby?” he called to her; she spun around, facing him. “You’re going to be an amazing mommy.”
The grateful smile that appeared left almost as quickly as it had shown itself. “Thank you, but flattery won’t get you out of this.”
“Will it get me playtime later?” he teased, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.
Suppressing a grin, she answered, “Only napping now will earn you that privilege.”
He immediately closed his eyes and started making snoring noises. Satisfied, she stepped out into the hall and closed the door, certain that within minutes, he would be fast asleep. Hearing him shift and settle in confirmed that.
The smile she wore faded as she made her way into the kitchen. She didn’t necessarily want a cup of tea, but she started making one anyway, her concerns distracting her from rational thought.
Following his lead, they played it off with humor, but knowing that he hadn’t been sleeping had her worried. His easygoing banter and jokes hid it for a while, but beneath it all, he was as stressed as she was. The calm assuredness he’d always shown had been more of a comfort to her than she realized.
She insisted on knowing the truth, but now that she knew it, she almost wished she didn’t. Having no idea how to construct a wall like he could, she knew he would easily catch on to her distress once he was up from his nap. He was probably already aware. How were they supposed to live for the next century and a half like this? How were they supposed to subject a child to the same fate?
Tears filled her eyes as she placed her hand on her abdomen.
How much say would the Registry insist on, in regard to raising their child? She would ask Craddock when he woke up, but she had a feeling he wouldn’t have the answers. Or at least ones of any comfort.
****
Bibi let herself in after an obligatory knock, like she always did when the door was unlocked, but as she rounded the couch and came into view, Jessica
realized this wasn’t a typical visit. It looked as if she was about to start panicking at any moment.
“What’s going on?” Jessica tossed the magazine she had been glancing through over to the coffee table before scooting to the edge of the couch.
Bibi quickly put her finger to her lips. “Where’s Craddock?” Her chipper tone contrasted against the vibe she was giving off.
Jessica’s worried scowl deepened. “Taking a nap. Why?”
“The sunset is beautiful tonight.” Bibi attempted to sound upbeat, shaking her head in silent request that Jessica not question her. “Josiah and I were wondering if you guys would like to come see it.” She nodded sharply, encouraging an affirmative response.
“Yeah, just, let me go get him.” Wariness leaked out into Jessica’s tone, blending with the casualness she was trying to force.
When she pushed off the couch, standing, Bibi waved frantically to regain her attention, putting her finger to her lips again before pointing down the hall. Nodding, Jessica walked away and towards her room. She had no idea what was going on, but she did know one thing for certain. Bibi was insisting, wordlessly, that she couldn’t, or at least shouldn’t, speak freely.
Craddock was sound asleep as she approached, but as soon as her hand touched his shoulder, he startled awake.
“Dinnertime already?” he asked, unaware for the moment that anything was amiss. That changed in a flash of a second, however, when the anxiety she was feeling hit him like a violent wave. “What’s wr—?”
Cutting him off by placing her fingers over his mouth, she stared back at him for a few long, tense seconds. “Bibi and Josiah want us to go share the sunset with them.”
She was scared, he could tell, but he didn’t know why. Mainly because she didn’t. Righting himself and standing, he gathered her into his arms, consoling her even with the absence of information. Whatever was upsetting her, it had to do with Bibi, he realized. As he held her, his thoughts drifted over to the problems and issues from a year ago.
Jessica shifted away from him and shook her head.
If that wasn’t the cause of her anxieties, then what was? Her thoughts were so jumbled and disjointed, there wasn’t a coherent one amongst them.
Unnerved and frustrated, he moved to snatch his shoes off the floor by the bed, quickly following Jessica out of the room. When his eyes locked with Bibi’s as he entered the living room, he knew then for certain that something was very wrong.
He opened his mouth to question her, but before a syllable even left him, Bibi sliced her hands through the air to stop him. “C’mon! You’ll miss it!” With a wave of her hand, she gestured for them to follow her outside.
Though she sounded normal enough, almost happy, Craddock could tell that it was an act. But for whose benefit?
They could see Josiah pacing in the near distance; Wade was standing close by to him, vigilantly watching the road that led away from the house.
The tension grew thicker with every step. Finally close enough to see the expressions the two men were wearing, Jessica gasped and grabbed for Craddock’s hand. Josiah looked like he was ready to climb out of his own skin, and Wade looked like he was preparing to go to war.
“Oh God,” Jessica whispered, almost to herself, “this is bad.”
Craddock agreed, but when she briefly considered the possibility that the Purists had somehow found them, he shrugged.
Once gathered, the five of them stared around at one another, Craddock and Jessica both reluctant to be the first ones to speak, since they had been strongly encouraged not to several times before. It was Bibi who finally broke the silence.
“We have a problem.” Her tone now matched her words and troubled eyes. Acting time was over.
“What’s going on?” Craddock asked anyone who cared to answer, though his attention remained mostly on Bibi.
“The Registry never intended to let us go,” she answered, and while Jessica had pretty much come to that conclusion already, hearing it stated in such a matter-of-fact manner caused her to startle noticeably.
Craddock scowled, concerned and somewhat skeptical. “Is this a psychic thing?”
When Bibi shook her head in answer, Jessica asked, “Then how do you know this?”
As soon as Bibi glanced over at Wade, he took a step forward, implying in doing so that he was the one who had given her the information. “And,” he added, “that’s not the worst of it.”
Chapter Three
The cryptic words, and the severe expression worn by the man who had said them, caused Jessica’s and Craddock’s blood to run cold. Before he could even explain, they knew things were about to go from bad to inconceivably worse.
“They know everything, guys,” Wade continued. “Everything. The houses are bugged. Every room. The car is, too. Have been since the beginning.”
“Oh my God,” Jessica gasped, “they’ve been listening to us? They heard us—?” She stopped abruptly when the full implications of that dawned on her. Turning towards Craddock, leaning into him, she whispered, “They heard us.”
“Shit,” Craddock cursed, and then he asked Wade harshly, “Why?”
“To keep the upper hand,” he answered.
“In what?” Craddock shot back. His nerves were raw, not only from the conversation and situation, but because he could feel Jessica’s anxieties rising at an alarming rate.
“They wanted to know what you were thinking. What you were feeling. Gauge when to step in.”
Craddock arched an eyebrow. “Meaning what?”
“Step in and do what?” Jessica then asked.
Wade sighed heavily as he glanced back up the road that led away from the house. “They were trying to keep you happy – the house with the gourmet kitchen, with the living room that looks just like your apartment back in New York – but they knew it was just a matter of time. They know you’re miserable. They know you want to leave. They don’t want that. They’ll do whatever it takes to stop that from happening.” He stared at Craddock, pointedly.
“Shit,” Craddock whispered, looking away and to the ground.
“What?” Jessica’s panic filled eyes bounced between Craddock and Wade. “What will they do?”
Craddock pulled together the calmest voice he could. “They’re going to try to imprison us.”
“They’re not going to try to imprison you,” Wade countered, “they are going to imprison you. All of you. The plan has already been set in motion.”
Immediately upon him saying that, Jessica began to cry. “Why?” While she was both angry and scared, she sounded more the former than the latter.
“You’re seen as a flight risk to them now,” Wade explained. “They’re not willing to take that chance.”
“Can they do this?” Jessica knew very well that they could do it, what she was questioning was the legality of it.
Craddock sighed, defeated. “They can.”
“There isn’t someone we can talk to?” Jessica asked, desperate for them to dangle even the thinnest thread of hope that she could cling to. Wade hesitated, but then only shook his head in answer. “This is insane!”
“Insane, maybe, but true,” Bibi replied, physically drained and emotionally distant.
“There has to be a way to stop this from happening!” Jessica glanced around at each of them before her gaze landed on Craddock, requesting his thoughts and support.
It wasn’t Craddock, though, who responded. “There’s only one way to,” Wade said, and Jessica’s eyes darted back to him. “We have to run.”
“Run?” That word alone caused Jessica’s adrenalin to spike. “As in, go on the run? Isn’t that… dangerous?” Her silent concerns shifted onto her unborn baby, and when they did, Craddock pulled her into his arms.
Bibi gave the only answer her tired mind had the strength for, indirect as it was. “It’s the only way.”
“That’s no way to live,” Jessica whispered to Craddock, still wrapped in his embrace, “or raise…”
She trailed off, but he knew where her thoughts were. It would have been hard enough raising their child while under the Registry’s thumb. Raising him or her while on the run meant danger, and instability. Neither option seemed any better than the other.
“Guys…” Bibi regained their attention, though they didn’t move physically when they gave it to her. “They’re planning on separating you.”
Horrified, Jessica spun out of Craddock’s arms. “What?! Why?!”
“It’s a power game,” Wade answered. “Can you imagine the power they would have over you? What they could get you to do – agree to – if they dangled that over your head? If they dangled the hope that you would get to see him again, after months or years of not being able to? If they told you he would be killed if you didn’t?”
A bone-deep shudder rippled through Jessica’s body. “They would kill him?”
“No, but they might tell you that. Would you honestly take the risk?”
She wouldn’t. There was no way she could. And what about the baby? Would they use him or her as a pawn in their sick game as well?
“They might,” Craddock whispered towards the ground; he then lifted his head and locked eyes with Wade. “We’ll run.”
Jessica only half listened as Wade explained that they would need to take his car, since theirs was bugged and had a tracking device installed. That once he helped them, there was no going back for him. Her focus blurred and drifted, moving off of him to the horizon beyond.
The sunset really was beautiful.
Her attention only returned when Craddock wrapped his arm around her shoulder and started directing her towards Wade’s SUV.
“So now we’re running from two sets of angry people,” Jessica muttered, numb as she moved. “The Registry and the Purists.”
“Not exactly.” Wade waited for everyone to climb in before explaining. “The Purists were never after you. The Registry made that up.”
Shocked, confused, Craddock asked, “What in the hell are you talking about? We were there! Their headquarters… The rock quarry…”
“All part of their plan.” Wade buckled his seatbelt and slipped the key into the ignition. “All orchestrated by the Registry, to scare you into clinging to them for protection.”