by Jana Janeway
Jessica sighed as she pinched another finger full of Mealies and popped them into her mouth. ‘I wish you had met Shea before all this happened. He wasn’t always this angry.’
‘I know. I know he’s a good man, and a good big brother. Stress just happens to bring out the worst in people.’
She nodded in agreement, appreciative of his understanding, but then a yawn escaped. The ordeal alone would have tired her, but added to that was the saccharin in her system, and the pregnancy hormones coursing through her; it all combined to create a sudden case of exhaustion.
First placing the near empty bowl on the floor and out of the way, Craddock then moved to tuck her in, like a doting father might do for his child.
‘You need to rest now.’ He kissed her forehead, relaxing her, but when he grabbed the discarded bowl and headed for the door, she tensed.
‘You’re not leaving, are you?’
‘Just for a few minutes. I’ll be right back. Sleep.’
It took seconds only for her eyes to drift closed. He waited a moment, but after sensing she had nodded off, he left and stepped towards the bedroom he knew Shea and Stacy were in.
Getting through to an irate brother was not in Jessica’s best interest.
Chapter Fifteen
It was bound to be a bad conversation, but Craddock was determined to get through to Shea somehow. Not only did he fear for his brother-in-law’s wellbeing – if he continued at this rate, an ass-kicking was inevitable – but he was also concerned about Jessica’s peace of mind. She had enough worries in queue.
He hesitated a moment before knocking, but not because he was afraid of Shea. They had a decent enough friendship, cultivated through brief phone calls over the last year; their love for Jessica, mutual yet obviously different, afforded them a unique sort of kinship.
When Stacy opened the door, Craddock held up the bowl he still carried like an offering. “We have leftovers. Was wondering if Shea might be hungry.”
Relieved that he was there, Stacy was quick to wave him in. “Talk to him, please.” Her whispered plea had an almost urgent quality to it.
As he took the first few steps inside, instead of lingering or joining them like Craddock had expected her to, she ducked around the opened door and bolted from the room.
Assuming where Stacy was going, Craddock turned to Shea, concerned. “Jessica’s asleep.”
“She’s just looking to escape.” Taking the bowl from Craddock, he moved towards the bed. “We fought.”
It was as good an opening as any, so Craddock jumped on it. “You want to talk about it?”
“She says if I don’t chill out, I’m going to get myself beat up. Or worse.” Offering nothing further, head and gaze dropped downward, he began to eat.
“Not to make things worse,” Craddock said carefully, “but she’s got a point.” Even though Shea shot him a brief, narrow-eyed glance, he continued. “We’re just worried about you. Stacy, Jessica, myself…” He joined him on the edge at the foot of the bed as he trailed off.
“I’m not what they say I am,” Shea muttered, frustrated. “I’m not selfish, or reckless. I’m just… scared. Aren’t we all?” His anger resurfaced slightly.
Craddock nodded. “Hence the tension and hostility. But, ya’know, as politically incorrect as it might be to say this, the women are going to be looking to us for stability during all of this. If we go flying off the handle, it makes it harder for them to remain calm.”
“I’m not trying to upset anyone,” Shea insisted. Finishing what he wanted of the food, he then handed the bowl back to Craddock.
“I know that.” He wasn’t at all hungry, but since there were only a few Mealies left, he finished them off before setting the bowl on the floor.
“What was your relationship like with your parents?” Shea’s question seemed out of the blue. It wasn’t, though. There was a point he was about to make, and Craddock knew it.
“It was fair,” he answered, “but not the best.”
“Maybe it takes having a good relationship to get where we’re coming from, then. Jessica and I had a great relationship with our parents. She’ll argue that they liked me more than her, but honestly, that just isn’t true. They loved her every bit as much. Love. Present tense, since they’re not dead.”
Craddock remembered her comments about that, but chose to remain silent. Shea seemed to have a need to get these things off his chest.
“Even into adulthood, we would spend time together,” Shea continued. “Dinner almost every week, conversations on the phone almost daily; they were always very involved, and loved spending time with us. Jessica would cook,” a grin inched onto his face at the memory, “and then we would play games, or watch movies.” His smile faded. “I just keep thinking that, if the tables were turned, and it was us imprisoned, they would do anything and everything possible to… to free us.”
Though he tried to hide it, he choked up on the final few words, and Craddock felt a lump form in his throat in sympathy. Telling him that they were attempting to devise a plan would likely ease his sorrow, but if the plan never came to fruition, his probable reaction might very well be the final straw that would earn him an ass kicking.
Sticking to his original position of waiting to share that piece of news, Craddock instead brought his arm up around Shea’s shoulder. “I’m sure they would. But ask yourself this… would they honestly want you to risk your life, and Jessica’s life, and their unborn grandbaby’s life, trying to?”
When Shea shrugged in response, Craddock added, “Parents tend to want to protect their children. What they might do isn’t always what they would want their children to do.”
“But shouldn’t we at least try?” His tone rose, but not in anger.
“You did try,” Craddock exclaimed, “and look where it landed you! Look where it landed Jessica!”
Shea shrugged Craddock’s arm off his shoulder and turned to face him. “You think I’m not sick about what happened? She was crying so hard, when we were in that room. It nearly killed me! I told her she shouldn’t go! She insisted!”
Craddock startled; he was under the impression that Shea had talked Jessica into going with him. Was he lying, or had she? He knew he would have to pose that question cautiously. “Wasn’t it your idea to do this?”
“It was my idea,” Shea admitted, “but I told her it wasn’t safe for her to go. I had planned all along to go it alone, but she started crying – told me they were her parents, too – so… I caved.”
Confused, Craddock ran through his few and brief conversations with Jessica, realizing as he did so that she never actually said Shea talked her into going with him. When he suggested that Shea had guilted her into it, she didn’t confirm or deny it. She carefully sidestepped the answer, both verbally and in thought.
That realization caused him to smirk. “She’s stubborn. Headstrong. Guess it runs in the family?”
“Mom more than Dad,” Shea answered with a smirk to match. “Guess we both took after Mom.”
Craddock chuckled, but was quick to steer the conversation back to serious. “Look, I need to ask something of you, and I’m not looking to start a fight or anything, but it needs to be said.”
The sudden tension that overtook Shea’s body was visibly noticeable. “What’s that?”
Taking in a deep breath, Craddock prepared himself for whatever reaction Shea might have, and then he let it out slowly. “I need you to get a grip on things, ya’know? We’re in for a long haul here, I think, and if you let everything everyone says upset you, it’ll make for an even harder time.”
With a bowed head, Shea nodded just once; he was obviously guilt-ridden. Maybe that would be enough to curb his tongue in the future.
Craddock dropped it there, nodding as well. But then when he moved to leave the bed, before he could even gain his footing to do so, Shea pulled him back down.
“One sec.” He grinned a little at Craddock’s questioning expression. “Now that Jessica i
s resting comfortably, I’d like some answers.”
“Answers to…?” Craddock drawled.
“How in the hell did Jessica get pregnant?” Even though there was an edge to his tone, he seemed more curious than angry.
But this was not a conversation Craddock wanted to have. Not with anyone, but especially not with his brother-in-law. He tried to dodge it without appearing to be doing so. “Jessica was pretty upset that I let it slip in the first place. I think I should wait until she’s ready to share before I say any more.”
At first, Shea seemed to accept that, but then he pressed further for answers with his very next breath. “You guys didn’t do this on purpose, did you?”
There was no way Craddock was going to answer that question. He could tell by the tone Shea used when asking that he disapproved.
“We’ll have a family meeting and discuss it, okay? Right now, I need to get back to Jessica. If she wakes up and I’m not there—”
“Doc!”
Both men startled when the sharp knock followed his name being called.
“Yeah?” Craddock wasn’t quite able to keep the alarm from his voice as he raced to the door. The moment he threw it open, Marcy came into view.
She wore a smile, which told him that everything was okay, but then she held up an object he didn’t recognize, and his brow furrowed in response.
“Would you like to hear your baby’s heartbeat?” Her smile grew wider when happy tears sprang to his eyes.
Pointing at it, he gulped down the lump in his throat so that he could speak without choking on his words. “That’s the thing?”
Her smile remained as she nodded.
“Can we come, too?” Shea asked, referring to him and Stacy.
“Yeah,” Craddock whispered, leading the way as he headed for his and Jessica’s assigned room. He virtually ignored Shea as he called for Stacy, loudly.
They entered the room on tiptoes, everyone holding back by the door as Craddock approached a still sleeping Jessica. He knelt down beside the bed and took her hand in both of his.
‘Baby? I need you to wake up.’
‘No. Why?’
He laughed out loud, then asked her silently, ‘You wanna hear Junior’s heartbeat?’
Her eyes flew open, instantly locking with and searching his. ‘How?’
‘They got a fetal heart gizmo.’
It was then that Jessica’s gaze moved past Craddock. There was Marcy, standing in the doorway, waggling an electronic device of some kind. Her attention wandering further to Marcy’s left showed Shea and Stacy, hovering nearby, both with expectant expressions on their faces. Bibi, Wade, and Josiah stepped up behind them a second later.
“Can we hear, too?” Bibi asked. Josiah nodded along emphatically.
‘I invited Shea, and he called to Stacy, but if you want, I can tell them this is a private moment. I would have to say it to all of them, though, or the ones asked to leave will be butt-hurt.’
‘They can stay.’
Craddock’s expression gave away his excitement; he blindly waved the others in while continuing to stare at Jessica.
“Okay, Jess,” Marcy said, stepping nearer, “I need you to hike up your shirt a bit, and drop the waistband of your pants down to just past your belly button.”
As Jessica did so, Craddock repositioned himself so that he could watch what Marcy was doing, still at his wife’s side, still holding her hand.
‘I didn’t know they had one of these.’
‘They didn’t. They got it for you.’ He startled when Jessica did, when Marcy squirted cold gel onto her abdomen. ‘Didn’t I tell you that?’
‘No.’
“Okay Jess, just relax.”
Various odd sounds emanated from the device once it was turned on, intensifying when Marcy slid the wand through the conductive slime, but none of them seemed to be a heartbeat. The way she began to scowl set Craddock on edge.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, trying but failing to keep the worry from his tone.
Marcy’s scowl grew. “I’m just having a little difficulty finding…”
When she trailed off, Jessica’s sense of panic took hold. ‘Something’s wrong. Craddock? Something’s wrong!’
They were his thoughts as well, but he didn’t want to add to Jessica’s distress. Instead of answering her, or acknowledging her, he asked Marcy, “Maybe you’re doing it wrong?”
“Maybe,” Marcy replied, though she knew she wasn’t. It wasn’t a complicated task. Just to be certain, and also to help put the nervous parents at ease, she asked the room, “Someone go see if this came with an instruction manual, please.”
Wade assigned himself. Before he ran off, he gave Bibi’s shoulder a gentle squeeze. She had tears in her eyes as she watched what was happening.
No one said it out loud, but everyone was thinking it; something seemed to be wrong. But then hope rose when the Doppler picked up on a faint sound.
“Is that it?” Craddock’s slight optimism was dashed when Marcy shook her head.
“That’s Jessica’s heartbeat. The baby’s will be faster.” She continued to try, though she felt it was a lost cause.
“There were no instructions,” Wade reported as he reentered the room. Only then did Marcy turn the device off and remove the wand from Jessica.
“There might be reasons for this,” she offered, noting the fear and disappointment in both Jessica’s and Craddock’s expressions.
“Like?” Shea asked with calm intensity.
Marcy struggled to answer. She wasn’t exactly sure what reasons there could be off the top of her head. But then, suddenly, she asked Jessica, “How far along are you?”
“We haven’t seen a doctor, obviously,” Craddock answered, “but we think she’s about six weeks.”
Marcy smiled, sighing with relief. “She’s not far enough along. The Doppler won’t pick up the baby’s heartbeat before eight to ten weeks.”
Just being given an option that didn’t point to the death of her baby, Jessica burst into tears, and in response, Craddock leaned in and pressed his lips to her forehead.
‘He’s just not old enough yet, okay, baby? We’ll try again in a couple weeks.’
“I know it’s hard, but try not to worry,” Marcy said. “Complications are rare.”
“But not impossible.” Jessica’s teary eyes locked with Marcy’s confident ones.
“Only if the baby is Human,” Marcy replied honestly.
“How could it be Human?” Shea asked. “They’re both Mengliad! Now,” he added as an afterthought.
“But she was Human before,” Wade answered. “She was born Human.”
“And both her parents are Human,” Marcy included.
“What happens if the baby is Human?” Jessica asked worriedly.
“Nothing, usually,” Marcy tried to sound reassuring, “but there is a chance of complications.”
“Is there a way to prevent them?” Stacy asked, wiping the tears from off her cheeks. Shea pulled her tighter against him, offering her comfort.
“I believe there is, but I would have to look it up. Contrary to what might be believed, I don’t know everything.” When she turned her attention towards Wade, he caught on.
“I think they can give us use of the laptop for a few. I’ll go see.” Bibi followed when he left, as did Josiah.
‘Why is this happening to us?’
‘We don’t know that anything is happening, baby. This could just be a simple matter of Junior not being old enough yet to pick up his heartbeat.’
‘What if something is, though? What are we going to do? We can’t just wander into a hospital!’
Her heart was racing, as were her thoughts. She was imagining all the bad that could possibly happen, working herself into a higher gear of distress.
‘Baby, stop. This isn’t good for you or Junior.’
‘I need to know, Craddock. I need to know if our baby is okay.’
‘I don’t know how to—’<
br />
“Out loud, guys,” Marcy requested, unwittingly interrupting Craddock’s thoughts.
“I have to know, Marcy,” Jessica said tearfully. “I need to know that our baby is okay.”
“The Doppler wasn’t too difficult to get, but a sonogram machine will be.”
“What about… an internal exam?” Shea suggested, a bit hesitantly. Everyone’s attention darted over to him, making him fidget. “I watch a lot of TV. Can’t you at least tell how far along she is by doing an examination?”
“I wouldn’t know what to feel for,” Marcy said, and then she asked Jessica, “Have you noticed any bleeding? Do you remember when the first day of your last menstrual cycle was?”
“The eighth of last month. And I haven’t been bleeding…” Pausing, she added, “From there.”
Marcy nodded. “I’ll have to check a chart, but it sounds like you might be about six weeks along.”
“It’s a good sign that she hasn’t been bleeding, right?” Craddock stared at her, almost willing her to agree with him, to help ease Jessica’s mind.
Marcy played along, though she really didn’t know much about prenatal care and situations. “Yes, it is. Just relax, Jess, okay? I’ll do some research online, and let you know what we can do to ensure you have a healthy pregnancy.”
Craddock gave Marcy a subtle nod of appreciation before leaping carefully onto the bed. He then snuggled up to Jessica and gathered her into his arms. The guilt he was feeling was all consuming; it was easily detectable to Jessica, no matter how hard he tried to hide it.
‘You didn’t know. You were just excited to hear the heartbeat. I was, too.’
When she started to cry again, Craddock pulled her tighter to him, near tears himself. The others, to give them their privacy, discreetly ducked out of the room.
‘We’ll still get to hear it, baby. We just need to be patient.’
Wanting desperately to believe that, she nodded against him, but her concerns were far from alleviated. “What kind of complications will there be, if the baby is Human?”
“I’m not sure,” he answered truthfully, “but if it’s at all fixable, we will fix it.” ‘Rest now.’ He kissed her lips softly. ‘No more negative thoughts, okay?’