“I am afraid I do not understand,” he said, wanting her to go on but very careful not to question her directly.
“You are my husband’s attorney, Mr Winchester, and so I am sure that you will have been given the task of transferring a vast amount of money from the Duke to my father.” She smiled again when he shifted awkwardly in his seat. “I am not asking you to confirm it, so you need not fear that I would seek to have you betray the Duke’s confidence. But I know you must realize that my father was paid very handsomely for the sale of his only daughter.” The bitterness had vanished only to be replaced by a look of utter desolation and the deepest sadness.
“Sale?” he said and wished he had not.
“I am sure that you know that it is always a sale, Mr Winchester. A transaction between men of which women play no part and have no say.”
“Yes,” he said, knowing it to be true. “But not all young ladies would see it as such.”
“No, they would not. They are either conditioned to expect it and see no wrong in it, or they are pleased to be elevated in some way. In a way, I envy the latter. In their own way, such women actually do have a little say in it all, albeit nothing that would be acted upon. But they become a part of the transaction then, a part of the process in that they see ways in which they might benefit.”
“Yes, I believe that to be true,” Daniel said and suddenly felt a great wave of guilt wash over him.
That was, he knew, exactly how he had seen Eliza Ashton. He had mistaken her cool behaviour for complicity in her new circumstances, and now he could see that it was anything but.
“And now that my family live in perfect safety once more, Bexley Hall saved from loss, my mother would seek to excuse their treatment of me.”
“And that is why you are upset?” he spoke gently and wished there was some way for him to soothe her.
“I am angry, Mr Winchester. I am furious that my mother would explain it all away with words I had never expected to hear from her. Ideas that women have always been treated thus and should, therefore, find some means of learning to live with the idea. That matters of the heart are always left to us, never once affecting the men in our lives.”
“I am so very sorry.”
“But her words are an excuse that I shall never accept, for it is no proper excuse, is it?”
“No, it is not.” Daniel could feel his admiration for her growing by the minute.
How brave she had been to have been able to fool him into thinking she was like so many others in her situation who did not feel it greatly, who did not rail against it. How much it must cost her every day to hold it all inside.
But there was more than anger in her, and he knew it. He could almost feel it. Even though he knew he ought not to ask, he had already come so far, had already crashed through the barriers that were in place for some reason he could hardly remember now.
“But you are more than angry, are you not? You are hurt, I think.” He studied her face for any signs of annoyance.
“I am hurt in more ways than I can possibly tell you, Mr Winchester. You see, I had never expected that my family would ever do such a thing. I never thought they could ever do anything for which I would never forgive them.”
“They had always been kind beforehand?”
“Yes, they had always been kind. There was never any possibility that my father would choose a husband for me. I had never any cause to doubt that it would be a choice I would make for myself.”
“Until hard times made themselves known,” he concluded.
“Yes. Until then.” Her tears had all gone, but her eyes were red and sore, and her perfect skin blotchy.
“And your mother misses you,” he ventured.
“Yes. Or at least she claims to.”
“You do not believe her?”
“I scarcely know what to think. And so, I choose not to think about it at all.”
“I cannot see how such a thing can be pushed from your mind.”
“It is hard, but I must do it. I cannot let my emotions swallow me whole as they have done today. If I do, I shall never find a way through this life I no longer cherish. I cannot let them in. I cannot forgive them for this, even if it is the right thing to do.”
“Even if it made you feel better to have your family in your life again?”
“How can I look at them and know what they have done to me? How can I ever let them think that it was right?”
“Perhaps it is too early to try to find the answers to such questions.”
“Yes, perhaps it is,” she said and straightened in her seat. “But I am keeping you from your midday fresh air, Mr Winchester.” She smiled so brightly that he knew she was returning to her old self; putting on her brave face.
“Then I shall leave you in peace, Your Grace,” he said and rose to his feet.
“Thank you kindly, Mr Winchester.”
He opened the French windows and stepped out into the warm midday sunshine. Before he closed the door, he looked back in at her, staring until she raised her head to meet his gaze.
“And have no fear that I shall betray your confidence, for I shall not. Ever.”
Chapter 9
“I am so relieved that we still have our Thursdays, Eliza,” Ariadne said as the two of them, fresh from their victory at the bridge table, sat down on a couch. “Oh, yes please.” Ariadne turned her attention to an approaching maid.
“A tea tray, ma’am?” the young woman said brightly.
“That would be wonderful, thank you.”
“I am glad too. I do not know how I would manage my isolation without the respite of seeing you every week. I have that to be grateful for, and I am.” Eliza smiled warmly.
She had been looking forward to her regular excursion all week, even though she felt the same old sense of trepidation as she walked into Lady Dearborn’s drawing room; the snap of fear that Miles Gainsborough would be there.
But he had never made an appearance at the bridge from the time he had turned his back on Eliza. She secretly assumed that he would be too afraid to turn up and have strips torn off him by dear Ariadne. As sweet as Eliza’s friend was, she was almost fierce in her protection.
“Why are you smiling?” Ariadne said and brought Eliza back into the present. “You look amused, my dear.”
“Forgive me.” Eliza laughed. “I had just imagined Miles staying away from his regular engagement here for fear of you, my dear Ariadne.” Eliza tried to look apologetic rather than amused but failed miserably.
“And he would have every reason to fear me,” Ariadne said firmly, making Eliza laugh all the more. “Believe me, he will rue the day our paths ever cross again. He cannot avoid me forever. There will come a day, a ball or a buffet, a play in town or a musical recital.” She looked utterly distracted by her own plot. “And then I shall have him where I want him. He does not yet know the meaning of discomfort, I can assure you.”
“Ariadne! My goodness!” Eliza was struggling not to draw attention to herself. “I always knew you were my closest friend and ally, my most ardent supporter. But I never realized you could become so fearsome!”
“I cannot bear betrayal,” Ariadne said simply and smiled as the maid returned with their tea tray. “Oh, thank you kindly.”
“You’re welcome, ma’am.” The maid, who was smiling as broadly as Ariadne, curtseyed before leaving them.
“What a nice young woman. She is always smiling,” Ariadne said sweetly.
“Rather like you,” Eliza teased. “I wonder if she too hides the heart of a lioness beneath that sweet composure.”
“It is always the quiet ones.”
“Oh, Ariadne, how you cheer me! I could never have believed I would laugh again after these last days. But in no time, you have me smiling. I was right; I could never manage without you.”
“Of course, you could. You could manage anything; it is just that you should not have to.”
“You will grow tired of hearing me talk about my woes one
of these days.”
“I will not. And you must always tell me what is happening in your life, every bit of it. I shall never turn my back on you.” She eyed the tea tray. “Do you mind a strong cup? I thought I would let it brew a while.”
“That would be lovely. And thank you, I know you would never turn your back on me. You have shown yourself to have more courage than the rest.”
“And what of the Duke?” Ariadne lowered her voice to something just a shade quieter than a whisper. “Has he said any more about the whole business of, well, an heir?”
“Not a word about it.” Eliza peered around the smart, well-appointed drawing room.
Many acquaintances there were her own and certainly not a part of her husband’s circle of sycophants. But still, Eliza understood fully that gossip knew no bounds, and if one of the guests overheard something she said it could very easily find its way to the Duke’s ears.
“Not even to apologize?”
“Certainly not,” Eliza said with a scowl. “I have come to realize that he would not apologize for anything. I have been taken in a little, lulled into a false sense of safety. But I know now that I cannot trust his easier moods, for all they do is hide the angry little monster beneath. The monster who is set free when he drinks too much.”
“Oh, my dear, you must be careful. Men who take too much strong liquor can become violent.” Ariadne was barely mouthing the words. “You must always keep your wits about you when he is in drink. I do not mean to frighten you, but I must say it in the hopes you will keep yourself safe.”
“Thank you. And I am not afraid; I know I must hear these things.”
“And what more do you have to tell me about the mysterious Mr Winchester?” Ariadne’s eyes had widened a little with interest.
“Mysterious? Goodness me, he is hardly that.” Eliza laughed. “But you must pour the tea before it is too strong even for you.” Although she was still laughing, Eliza knew she was playing for time.
In the days following her rather candid conversation with her husband’s attorney, Eliza had found herself thinking of him more and more. He really was attractive in a way that she could never have imagined he would be when the two of them had regarded one another so coolly that first day in the chapel.
But she knew there was a little more to it than that. Beyond his irregular, surprising handsomeness, there was a feeling of safety that had come upon her more than once in his presence. She had thought it to be his broad build and impressive height, but she wondered if it had more to do with his calm nature and his upright bearing. Who would not feel safe in the company of a man who never cowered?
And then there were her worries, the concerns that she had given away a little too much of herself.
“Well? Mr Winchester? Have you spoken to him since your conversation in the morning room?” Ariadne was clearly not going to let it go.
“I have not seen him,” Eliza said.
The truth was that she had avoided him altogether. Although he had been a great comfort to her on the day, Eliza now felt embarrassed whenever she thought of how he had found her crying with her mother’s letter open on her lap.
“Is he not working at Lytton Hall?”
“He is. But I have not been in the morning room for some days,” Eliza admitted. “That is where our paths cross most regularly.”
“And why have you not been? Had the Duke said something?”
“No, I would be surprised if Augustus even knew I spent my mornings there. He never goes in there himself, and of late, he hardly rises before noon. He has been drinking very heavily recently, and it keeps him in bed nursing a headache more often than not.”
“Then you have avoided Mr Winchester?”
“Yes, I suppose I have.”
“But why, when he would seem to be such a nice man?” Ariadne seemed curiously disappointed.
“I fear I gave away too much on the day I received my mother’s letter. If only he had not come in at that moment, we could still be on our old footing.”
“But your old footing was one of mutual suspicion and aloofness.”
“Which is probably how it ought to be.”
“You must surely trust him, though? He did not give you away to anybody, did he? You asked him to keep the matter to himself, and he did. I would say that makes him very trustworthy and a little excellent.”
“A little excellent?” Eliza laughed. “You do say such things.”
“I think his discretion and care most excellent,” Ariadne spoke a little in his defence.
“Yes, I am grateful for him keeping his word. But I wonder where our acquaintance can go from here onward. I mean, I feel we have suddenly become a little too close, even though I know very little about him, and he knows very little about me. But those few moments in conversation were so unguarded as to almost be … intimate.” Eliza felt her cheeks warming and hoped Ariadne would not see her blush.
“Yes, I suppose it is a little awkward. But it was a matter out of your control, and his also.”
“But what purpose can there be in our continued alliance?”
“Well, there is friendship, my dear.”
“Do you think it appropriate that I encourage a friendship with my husband’s attorney?”
“When you put it like that, no. But then I do not think it appropriate that an old Duke marry a young woman and expect her to be pleased about it. And so, when I put it in my own terms, yes, I think such a friendship would be highly appropriate.” Ariadne sighed. “You need a friend in that place, Eliza. If your maid, Nella, will not open up to you, then you must look elsewhere. And it is clear to me that Mr Winchester has offered the hand of friendship on no less than two occasions now. Occasions when you very much needed a friend.”
“Goodness knows that it true.”
“Do not dismiss things based on the rules. The rules are all very well, but when they have been used against you in your own life, you must not consider that bending them a little yourself is such a great crime.”
“You are very wise, Ariadne. Very sensible.” Eliza felt suddenly relieved as if all she had really needed was the approval of her dearest friend. “I shall stop hiding myself away.”
“Good,” Ariadne said with a smile. “That is settled.”
“It is settled,” Eliza agreed with a light laugh.
“So, what other news do you have for me?”
“Nothing so very great,” Eliza mused. “Except that Augustus is hosting a large dinner tomorrow night. I am a little nervous, for I have never met so many of his friends at once. Well, I should say acquaintances rather than friends. I do not think my husband has any true friends. But I daresay I might find out something to the contrary tomorrow.”
“You must write to me the very next morning,” Ariadne said with excitement. “I want to hear all the names, what they were wearing, and if that dreadful man has a true friend anywhere in this world. You must study them all closely, my dear, and give me a full account. Do not forget your hobby of studying people!”
“If only for your sake, Ariadne, I shall pay very close attention.” Eliza shook her head and laughed. “Well, what do you say to another game? Do we have time?”
“We most certainly do,” Ariadne said and looked around the room for any sign of a space at one of the tables.
Daniel sat in his study staring down at the last batch of tenant farmer contracts and sighed. Would he never be finished this painstaking, dull task?
Since he had not put pen to paper all afternoon, he guessed not. But he had been unable to concentrate on his work at all after seeing Eliza from his window as she made her way out to the waiting carriage.
He understood that she had a standing engagement of some kind every Thursday, and he often saw her as she made her way out. She always looked so much lighter and younger as she set off, leaving behind all that bothered her there at Lytton Hall. Whatever that was.
Daniel realized that he still knew so little about her. Even though they had
shared those moments of what he thought of as closeness, still he did not know how she truly fared at the hall.
For one thing, he still had no idea what had upset her when the two of them had collided in the hallway. It very likely was not her mother, for Eliza had not received her letter until some days later.
What Daniel could not come to terms with was the idea that he wanted to ask her. He was sure that the Duke had upset her that day, he could just sense it somehow, but he knew it was none of his business.
For the Love of a Duchess: A Historical Regency Romance Book Page 7