by Xavier Mayne
“What are we drinking?” Fox asked, not waiting for the answer. He brought the glass to his lips and took a deep draft.
“A special request from this guy,” Carlos replied, jerking his thumb at Drew. “He wanted to relive the day you met.”
Fox smiled at Drew, completely charmed and perhaps a little more smitten than he already was. “Good choice.” He sat on the stool next to Drew.
Carlos topped off both their glasses from the unmarked bootleg bottle. “I’ll leave you guys to it, then,” he said with a wink. He retreated to the other end of the bar, though Fox noticed his frequent backward glances.
“To the end of a pretty terrible week,” Fox said as he raised his glass.
“The worst,” Drew agreed.
They touched their glasses and took a drink.
“So, tell me what made your week ‘pretty terrible,’” Drew prompted.
“Only if you promise to fill me in on what made yours ‘the worst.’”
“Deal.”
Fox took a breath. “I went on a date last night.” Saying this aloud made him realize the truth he’d been hiding from: in going on that date, he had cheated on Drew. It was an awkward and humbling epiphany. “And because you’re a better person than I am, I decided to follow your example and invite her over to my place. I cooked her dinner.”
Drew smiled. “That must have been very nice.”
“It was. And then it wasn’t. When I say I followed your example, I mean I really followed it. I made a Peruvian stew, about which I tried to tell a story half as charming as the one you told. It seemed like it was going well. But after dinner, she dropped the bomb.”
“I cannot believe that under the influence of your charm and that Peruvian stew she didn’t simply fall into your arms.”
Fox chuckled. “Yeah, that she did not do. She looked me right in the eye and informed me that I was in love with… you.” He swallowed hard. “And then she left.”
Drew’s eyes widened in disbelief. His mouth opened, he blinked several times, shook his head as if he must have misheard, then closed his mouth without saying anything.
“So that was a tough blow, because up until that minute—actually up until a sleepless night and what turned out to be basically an intervention from my buddy Chad over breakfast—I had never let myself admit that what she said might be true. Chad pretty much beat me to an emotional pulp over it until he finally broke me down enough to make me see what’s been in front of me the whole time.”
Drew seemed to try to catch his breath. “What would that be?”
“That your coming into my life wasn’t a mistake. And it wasn’t that Q*pid had delivered me a friend to replace the ones I’ve lost to wedded bliss. You’re a great friend, but that’s not nearly all you are to me. I was doing mental gymnastics trying to convince myself that we were buddies having fun and not potential matches going on dates.” He stopped for a moment and looked at Drew, remembering how much he enjoyed looking at Drew. “We’ve been dating. And it’s been awesome. And I’m sorry it took me so long to see it.”
“Wow,” Drew said. Then a huge smile broke out across his face. “Wow.”
“So tell me about ‘the worst,’” Fox said, hugely relieved that Drew had taken his awkward profession of affection so well.
“I went on a date last night.”
“Holy fucking shit—so we are practically the same person.” Fox laughed. “Please don’t tell me it went the same way as mine did.”
Drew shrugged. “It pretty much did, but with one rather significant exception.”
“What was that?”
“It was with a guy.”
Fox’s mouth dropped open. “You went on a date with a guy?”
Drew nodded. “I did. I’d never done it before, and basically I did it all wrong. But the whole reason I did it was because I was so hung up on you, and when you didn’t seem like you were into it, I started to wonder whether the problem wasn’t you, but me. Maybe I’ve been dating women, and all along I should have been dating guys. So I dated a guy. It was terrible.”
“Why?”
“Because he saw immediately that he—and any other guy I might try to date—was really a substitute for you. And until I found a way to get over you, it wouldn’t be fair for me to date anyone else.”
Fox was deeply touched. “I didn’t mean to make you miserable. I just couldn’t come around to it as quickly as you did. You’re a lot more flexible than I am.”
“I’m in grad school. I have friends who are into alternative sexualities that would make switching from women to men seem like amateur-hour stuff. Plus I’ve never been all that successful with women, so it makes some sense that I should probably cut my losses and give guys a try. I’m not the ladies’ man super stud you are.”
“First, no one would ever have used those words to describe me,” Fox said, his natural humility kicking in. “But second, and more importantly, is that what you want? To give guys a try?”
“Nope.” Drew frowned and shook his head solemnly.
“It isn’t?”
“Nope. I want to give one guy a try. And I don’t care whether that makes me gay, or heteroflexible, or bisexual, or none of the above. What it makes me is in love with you.”
Fox’s cheeks burned. “You tried to tell me that last weekend. I’m sorry I wasn’t ready to hear it.”
“You’re worth waiting for.”
“You did more than wait for me. You put up with a shit-ton of freak-out from me. I can’t tell you how sorry I am about pushing you away.”
“I knew you didn’t really mean it. It had all the signs of a red-alert masculinity meltdown, and I knew there was only one thing that would get through to you.”
“A stealth flying ninja tackle?”
Drew laughed. “Exactly. You didn’t stand a chance.”
“Honestly, it changed everything I thought about you.”
“Whoa. How did it do that?”
“After the romantic dinner, and your telling me that you might be falling for me, I think some reptile part of my brain lumped you in with the women I’ve dated, except that you were a hairier, more muscled version. But since you touched me that way, I expected you to be… I don’t know… passive? I guess? So it shocked me when you bounded right back up and smashed me against the wall.”
“You held your own pretty well there, mister. I didn’t think I was going to be able to get the better of you.”
Fox laughed. “You fucking destroyed me, man. You had me on the ropes even before you unleashed your secret weapon.”
Drew looked puzzled. “Secret weapon?”
Fox leaned close and whispered into Drew’s ear. “You smacked me with your dick.” He felt Drew jump in surprise.
“I did?” he asked, sounding utterly stunned.
“You did. And let me tell you, it packs quite a punch. Especially when it’s… fully deployed.”
Drew’s face reddened. “Oh my God. I had no idea. I was trying really hard to keep it away from you.”
“You mostly succeeded, except for the one time when it bludgeoned my leg. I didn’t realize what it was immediately, but a couple of seconds later I put two and two together. I figured if you were that into fighting me, I should probably retire from the field of battle.” He smiled slyly at Drew. “Now, though, I’m kinda wishing I’d gotten a look at it. Or even gotten my hands on it.”
“Fuuuck,” Drew exhaled. “What do you say we get out of here?” He gulped down the last of the bourbon in his glass.
“Fuck yeah,” Fox replied. He downed his as well, then set the glass on the counter. “Carlos, my good man,” he called, “thank you for your service.” He pulled a hundred-dollar bill out of his wallet and set it on the counter.
Carlos, who had returned from the far side of the bar, looked at the tip. “You two being adorable is compensation enough for me.”
“Please, keep it. I owe you that and more for helping bring this guy into my life.” He cast a look a
t Drew and couldn’t keep the smile from his face.
Carlos looked from one man to the other as they grinned at each other. “Dammit, now I’m gonna have to go tug one out before I can finish my shift.”
“I’m sure you have things well in hand,” Drew retorted with a laugh.
“I will in a minute,” Carlos said, grinning widely. “You two have fun.”
“I can assure you we will,” Fox replied. He turned to Drew. “Shall we?”
FOX’S CAR was parked in the same place it had been three weeks ago, as gleaming and perfect as it had been then. Fox walked up to it and pulled open the passenger-side door.
“I can manage a car door,” Drew said with a sly smile.
“Friends can manage car doors,” Fox replied. “Dates get the full service.”
“I may hold you to that.”
“I hope you do.”
Drew settled into the seat, and Fox shut the door softly after him. Fuck, he’s good at this flirting thing.
Fox got in and pulled the car into traffic.
“Where are we going?” Drew asked.
“Figured we’d get some dinner.”
“You have any place in particular in mind?”
“I do. My place.”
Drew, startled, turned to Fox, wondering if he had misheard him. “Is My Place another restaurant with an annoying name?”
Fox laughed. “No, we’re actually going to my house. I ordered up way too much food today from that amazing grocery store downtown by the flower market, and they delivered it as I left for the bar. I have no idea what we’re going to make out of it—I picked everything that looked good.”
“That sounds like fun—and it sounds completely unplanned, which makes me a little suspicious. You normally have stuff planned to the last detail.”
“I used to. But now I have you. And when you’re with me, things turn out amazing, no matter what.”
Drew felt warmth in his chest from Fox’s casual confidence. Turns out he believed the same about Fox without ever being aware of it. “Awesome. Let’s see what we can make.”
A short time later Fox steered the car into a small, nondescript alley between two tall buildings, then pulled up to a metal door that looked strong enough to protect an embassy. He flashed his headlights at it, and it immediately began to roll upward, disappearing quickly into the ceiling. Fox eased forward and parked the car under a black plaque that read Kincade in stark silver letters.
“Can you manage your own door?” Fox asked after he shut off the engine.
“I think I’m capable,” Drew replied.
They walked to the elevators, and Fox pressed his thumb to the black control panel. One of the elevators opened instantly, and they stepped in. Unlike the clean but plain concrete of the parking structure, the elevator was luxuriously elegant. It silently whisked them skyward until the display read 42: Penthouses.
“Wow,” Drew said.
Fox shrugged. “They call them that because they’re on the top floor and they can sell them for a higher price. I mean, the view is nice, but they’re not that much bigger than the units on other floors.”
They stepped off the elevator. Only four doors opened off the sleekly elegant elevator lobby. Fox’s lay straight ahead.
“Well, it lacks the gritty, ramen-scented ambience of the student ghetto,” Drew said as Fox opened the door and beckoned him to enter, “but I’m sure it has its charms.”
“It has you, now,” Fox said. “That’s all it was missing.”
“Good lord, no wonder the ladies swoon for you.”
“But is it working on you?” Fox asked as he closed the front door behind them.
“Oh, it’s definitely working,” Drew assured him.
“Then would it be okay if I… kissed you?” Fox’s manner was suddenly reserved, tentative.
Drew felt a shiver of reckless possibility run through him. “More than okay,” he replied softly.
Fox stepped toward him, raising his hands. He tickled his fingers along Drew’s jaw, then below his ears to the short, sensitive hairs at the nape of his neck. He drew close.
The first brush of Fox’s lips against his was electric. It swept away everything he had ever experienced in a kiss, replacing it all with this overwhelming new sensation. Every kiss before—every kiss with a woman—had been an exercise in kindling a campfire in the rain, lighting a candle in a gale. The warmth of those previous kisses, every single one of them combined, could not compare with the heat sparked by this simple connection, this first contact between them. He knew, in that moment, that this was right. It was the most right thing he had ever done with another person. It lasted mere seconds, but it changed his life.
“Okay?” Fox asked, pulling back after the first kiss. He looked at Drew, eyebrows raised in anxious supplication.
Drew could have used his words. But that’s not what the occasion called for. Instead, he launched himself forward, closing the small gap between them in an instant and crashing his mouth into Fox’s. This kiss was not tentative. This kiss left no doubt.
Fox stepped back, but only to brace himself against the onslaught. He held firm, pulling Drew even harder into him, while Drew wrapped his arms around Fox’s back to ensure there was no sliver of daylight between them. They were as close as their clothes would allow them to be.
They stayed close for several long, vigorous minutes.
Finally, when they had exhausted themselves and needed to breathe, they released each other reluctantly. They stood for a long moment, looking into each other’s eyes.
“I can’t believe you’re here,” Fox whispered.
“There’s nowhere I’d rather be,” Drew replied.
They smiled at each other, then laughed. Not the laughter of anxious uncertainty about the line they had crossed, but the laughter of joy unbridled and undreamed-of dreams realized. They laughed because there was no other way for their exuberance to be released.
“So, dinner, I guess?” Fox asked.
“Yes, dinner.” Drew was certain he couldn’t eat a thing. But he was up for making anything with Fox.
“Come with me,” Fox said, then held out a hand for Drew to take. He led him into the kitchen.
“Holy balls, this is amazing,” Drew said, taking in the elegant kitchen with its sleek granite counters and European appliances. “This is like something out of a magazine.”
“It was one of the things I really loved about the condo,” Fox replied. “But I don’t get to cook in it as much as I’d like. Weekdays are mostly dinner out with clients, and weekends are dates. Last night was the first time I’d cooked for anyone in I don’t know how long.”
“I’m honored you would share it with me,” Drew said, then gave Fox a peck on the cheek, bringing a surprised smile to his face.
“Okay, so, fridge is there, pantry there, spices over there, and utensils here, here, and here,” Fox said, pointing out each location as he worked from one side of the kitchen to the other. “Ready?”
They got to work, Fox pulling out the fresh groceries he’d had delivered, and Drew marveling at the impressive range of ingredients he had on hand. They talked about what they should make, and shortly Fox was at the stove sautéing while Drew drizzled oil into a vinaigrette.
“For someone who doesn’t cook much, you have a pretty sure hand with the sauté pan,” Drew said, watching as Fox flipped the contents of his pan repeatedly without losing a single morsel.
“I used to cook a lot with my mom,” he said. “Dad was gone most evenings with work, so she and I spent a lot of time in the kitchen. Then when he had a heart attack and had to stay home for a few weeks, he let me know really clearly that I shouldn’t cook because it would make my future wife feel that she had nothing to offer except sex.”
“Were you raised in the 1950s?”
Fox laughed. “It felt like it sometimes. And the really stupid thing is that I did what he told me to do. I stopped cooking, and that meant I stopped spending time with my
mom.” He grew serious. “I should tell her I’m sorry that happened.”
“Okay, see, I thought you were charming when you flirted. But that was nothing compared to right now.” He pulled Fox into a hug from behind. “You are seriously the best person I know.” He kissed him on the neck.
“You’d better stop that if you want to eat tonight,” Fox warned. “I can’t cook with shivers running down my spine.”
“We’d better save that for dessert, then,” Drew said with a sly laugh. He kissed Fox one more time just below his ear, then went back to whisking.
An hour later, they sat down to an overwhelming feast. The large dining table was nearly covered with the food they had made together.
“We’re never going to eat all of this,” Drew said.
“But it was a hell of a lot of fun to make,” Fox countered. “And now we don’t have to worry about lunch for the whole week.” He picked up a glass of wine—his second, or was it third? “To the best sous-chef I’ve ever worked with.”
Drew laughed and held up his glass as well. “It was a pleasure to work under you.”
They drank and set to making barely a dent in all of the food they had cooked.
After dinner, and after the leftovers had been packed up, Fox poured some bourbon and motioned for Drew to join him on the sofa that faced the great wall of windows overlooking the park at the center of the city. A necklace of lights glowed around it.
“I can’t believe we’re here,” Drew said softly.
“If anyone had told me three weeks ago that this is where we’d end up… well, I probably would have told him to seek professional help. But now I can’t imagine not being here with you.”
“What do you suppose did it? Made the computer match us up, you think?”
Fox looked out the window into the far distance. “I’ve thought about that a lot,” he said finally. “On the surface, we don’t have a lot in common. At least not in the ways that people normally write profiles for online dating. You’re an academic, I’m a marketing director. You’re in touch with your emotions, and I outsource mine to Microsoft Excel.”