by Toni Aleo
With all that on my mind, and the fact I’m tired, dealing with the dance team is not what I want to do right now. What I’d love to do is go to Jude’s and take a nap. That’s what he’s doing since he’s hungover from playing beer pong last night. While I don’t condone drinking till you are passed out drunk, I understand why. His dad really gets to him, and Lord knows, I used to do the same thing. Drink myself numb so I didn’t feel all the pain and hatred in my heart, but I’ll be damned if I’m going to allow Jude to do that. He gets one time, and I plan on telling him that tonight when I see him. There are other ways to handle anger and hurt. I learned that in therapy.
I kinda wish I was in therapy right now. That’s how bad I want to leave this rehearsal. While I love teaching dance, teaching to a group of jerks is really trying my nerves. I figure that this is practice to get me ready for the bigger assholes of dance, but my goodness, how can a group of eight girls bitch so much? I mean, we are dancers! We had to be able to do certain stuff to join! So I really don’t understand why, when I add that stuff in the dance, people want to bitch. It’s insane and annoying. I don’t even want to be here, but I know I can’t leave. We perform Saturday, and I love this piece. I worked hard on it, and it’s going to be freaking fabulous as soon as these girls get it down. I don’t want us looking stupid in front of the Bullies team.
Especially my man.
“I can’t do a triple! I just can’t!” Mia complains and I stop the music.
I take in a deep breath and head toward her. “Yes, you can. Pull up, strong back leg, and hold it out,” I say, holding my arms out as I demonstrate it for her. “It’s all in the back leg. You have to push off with it to get you around three times. You can do it.”
She tries it a couple times, and finally the third time, she does it. “Feels good, right?” I ask as she grins at me.
“Yeah, I got it, thank you. You’re really good at this.”
“Thank you,” I say, and we share a small smile before I look out at the rest of the group. “Any other problems?”
No one answers me, so I go get the remote and then head to my spot which is right beside Rachael. I didn’t want to be by her, but I wanted to be in the middle so the team could see me. Since she’s the captain, I put her in the center, but I kind of wish I had stuck her in the back, or maybe even in the hall. I hate the way she’s watching me in the mirror, but I ignore her and hit play before calling out, “Five, six, seven, eight.”
The music to Jennifer Lopez’s “I Luh Ya Papi” starts and so do we. We all move in perfect unison, all attitude and great movement. I am so proud of this group in this moment. There are a few little wobbles here and there, but for the most part, it’s outstanding. When we finish, I stop the music and turn to the girls. “Great job, ladies. That turn was great, Mia. Keep working on it. Great attitude, Skylar. Remember, we have to point toes and be strong. Now, we only have twenty seconds left, and I want to do a side stretch. Like this,” I say then I throw my leg straight out to the side, my torso following the movement to where my body is completely horizontal, standing on one leg. Standing back up, I ask, “Who can do that? Or who wants to try?”
Only Skylar raises her hand as Rachael says, “No normal person can do that. I mean, how do you even do that and stay upright?”
Why does this girl test my patience? I have ten-year-olds who do that stretch beautifully. Swallowing loudly, I say, “I know a lot of people who can. It’s all about the strength in your bottom leg. Let’s all try it.”
She doesn’t say anything, and I demonstrate it a few times. Then I watch as some try it. It’s too rough though, and I know I can’t make everyone do it. When Rachael does it perfectly though, I clap in excitement.
“Great job, Rachael!”
When she gives me a shitty look, I want to punch her in the throat. But I ignore the need to do that because, as we’re both in the middle, we can do it together while everyone else does heel stretches or something. I explain what we’re going to do and everyone seems to be on board. I then run it over and over again, despite people bitching because I want this to be perfect. It isn’t till Rachael calls practice that I stop.
Unhooking my iPod, I head to where Skylar is standing by our bags, chugging a water. Before I can get to her though, Mia stops me. “Can you show me that stretch again? I want to try it again.”
“Sure,” I say, laying my iPod down and then doing it for her. She tries to mimic me, but her bottom leg isn’t strong enough. “It takes practice.”
“Yeah, you’re really flexible too.”
“Yeah, I am, years of practice and stretching.”
“I bet Jude loves that,” Maddy says in a snotty little way.
I ignore her and send Mia a smile before heading to my bag.
“Obviously not, since he was single last night,” I hear Rachael say.
Looking up, Skylar says, “Ignore her. She’s looking to get a rise out of you.”
I ignore Skylar though and say, “What does that mean?”
“Claire, ignore her,” Skylar says again, but I wave her off.
Setting me with a bitchy look, her hands on her hips, Rachael says, “Exactly what it sounded like. Jude was single last night at the party.”
“Oh no,” Skylar says faintly.
Taking a step toward Rachael, I ask, “Oh really?”
“Oh yeah, but don’t worry,” she says, giving me a very condescending look. “No one expected y’all to work.”
My face heats with anger as my heart pounds in my chest. It can’t be true. It can’t be. “How do you know this?”
With her eyes locked on mine, her chin up in the air in a defiant way, she says, “’Cause I slept with him.”
I can hear the gasps but mostly all I hear is my own heartbeat in my ears. “Is that right?”
“Sure did, right, Mia?”
Mia looks away and shrugs as my eyes bore a hole in her head. “I don’t know.”
I don’t necessarily trust Mia, but she’s an all right person, unlike this cuntbag.
“You followed me downstairs. Don’t act like you don’t know what happened,” Rachael says, and when Mia’s eyes meet mine, I actually want to cry.
“She did go into his room. I don’t know what happen though ’cause I went back upstairs,” Mia says quickly.
“Yup, he got superdrunk and begged me for it. I was a little tipsy, but I couldn’t say no. Though this morning when I woke up, I sorta felt bad since we’re so close and all,” she says, her eyes in slits. I want to reach up and claw them out of her face, but I know that won’t do anything but get me kicked off campus since there is a no-fighting clause. She’s lucky that I care about my education, or I’d beat the living crap out of her. I don’t want to believe the words that are coming out of her mouth, but it just seems like too much of a coincidence. I mean, he was at the party, he was drunk, and now he’s hung over. He told me it was a wild night. He was honest about everything, but did he leave some things out?
Turning before I do exactly what I want, which is beat this bitch’s ass, I head out of the building, ignoring Skylar and forgetting my bag and the fact that I’m wearing only a bra and booty shorts. I don’t even feel the cold air, though; I’m too mad. Thankfully the Bullies’ house isn’t too far though, because once I reach the door, my toes are frozen. Tears sting my eyes, but I refuse to let them fall. He didn’t do this. I know he didn’t, but just to be sure I’m going to ask him, and if he lies to me, I swear I will choke him.
The only problem is that somewhere deep inside me, I wonder if he did, and I honestly hate that.
Walking into the house instead of knocking, I head downstairs to his room and knock on the door. Jayden answers and gives me a weird look before I say, “I need to speak with Jude.”
“Where are your clothes?”
“Don’t worry about that. I need to see Jude,” I say, my voice stern.
He shakes his head, concern on his face as he points upstairs. “He’s upstairs ea
ting.”
“Thanks,” I say and I rush back upstairs with Jayden on my heels.
“Everything okay, Claire?” he asks, trying to keep up with me. “Do you want a shirt or something?
“No, and it depends on if your brother cheated on me,” I answer as I make my way to the kitchen.
“Oh hell,” he mutters just as I reach it to find Jude with his head on the table, a bowl of cereal beside him. He looks like hell. His hair is all in disarray and he’s not wearing a shirt, just athletic shorts. His face is pale and I almost feel bad, but then I remember that he might have slept with Rachael, and all my sympathy flies out the damn window.
He looks up at me and his brows come together. “Where are your clothes?”
“Don’t worry about that,” I say, waving him off. “Did you fuck Rachael last night?
His brows come together more and he sits up. “Huh?”
Letting out a long breath, I say it a little slower. “Did you–” I say, pointing to him “–have sex–” I say, and then take my finger and put it in the hole I’m making with my other hand “–with Rachael?”
“No way. Why would I do that?”
“I don’t know. ’Cause you can’t last two weeks without it? ’Cause I’m not enough? Be straight with me, Jude, because she’s claiming it, and announced to the whole fucking dance team that y’all fucked last night at this party! You better not be lying to me!” I yell and he stands up slowly.
“What the hell? I’m not lying, and also, why the fuck would you entertain that shit? You know she’s a liar and out to ruin us.”
“It’s just such a coincidence since I left and you were at the party that she was at and someone saw you walk into the room with her!”
His eyes go wide as he shakes his head. “Claire, I can’t believe you are even coming at me with this. I did not sleep with Rachael. Not only do I have no freaking desire to ever touch that chick, but I’m with you. Totally with you.”
I want to be mad, I want to scream, but I can’t help but believe the words he says. “It just seems like you would.”
“Why? That doesn’t even make sense. Have I given you any sort of doubt in the last two weeks? No. I’ve been yours since the moment I saw you.”
“It’s just hard to believe, Jude. Everyone says you aren’t the guy I’m falling for, and now this comes up, and I know the other shoe was bound to drop. This was too good to be true.”
“It is true,” he says, taking a step toward me. “I don’t want anyone but you, and yeah, it’s fast, and yeah, I did a one-eighty. But I did it for you. Because you matter. You have to believe that you are important, that you matter to me,” he stresses, and I look away. “I may not know your story ’cause you haven’t told me yet, Claire, but I want to do everything to make you feel important and loved. I don’t want you to ever think of that life before. I want to make you forget it and show you a better life. I want your trust, baby, because you have all mine.”
Oh, fuck me, I could have done without that last sentence. The tears well up in my eyes, and I look down at the ground, not knowing what to say. Cupping my chin, he brings my face up to look into my eyes. His green eyes are shining with all the love and trust in the world, and I know darn well he didn’t cheat. I think I knew before I came over here; I was just so scared that I wasn’t enough. I’ve never been enough before, so why would I be now? But then, that’s not true either because I’m enough for Phillip and Reese and the rest of my family. I need to stop this way of thinking. I’m not that person anymore, I’m new and shiny and Jude sees that.
“I heard this song and the whole time I’m thinking of you because I only miss you when I’m breathing, baby. Even when you’re here, in front of me, I miss you because I feel like I can’t get enough of you. Do you think I’d fuck that up for some bitch who doesn’t matter?”
Swallowing back my tears, I shake my head. “I don’t think so.”
“That’s right. You are too damn important to me. So please don’t ever entertain that bullshit, and believe in us, ’cause this is real.”
I nod again and he presses his lips to mine. I melt into his lips, his arms, his body. Holding me up, he kisses the hell out of me, making me breathless and leaving me starting to feel dizzy. Parting, he leans his forehead against mine and I meet his gaze, my heart exploding and coming back together in my chest.
“I’m sorry. I’m an idiot.”
He smiles as he nods. “Just a little bit, but it’s okay, I like that about you.”
A grin pulls at my lips and I lean in, about to kiss him, when someone says, “Since you two are done, I’d like to say I slept with Rachael last night, not Jude.”
I look over to find that it’s Matt who’s standing beside Jayden with his arms crossed across his chest. “She came out of your room bitching that you wouldn’t give it to her, so I gave it to her. She told me not to tell you guys, but it isn’t like I care what she says, and plus I don’t like when people start drama. So yeah, I hit it, and Jude didn’t. He’s all obsessed with you and shit,” he says, and Jude scoffs.
“Obsessed is a little overkill. I just like you a lot,” he says and I smile.
“Good, ’cause I like you a lot too.”
And I do. So much.
I might even love him.
Chapter 26
Claire
“I’ll come with you to get your stuff, and then we’ll come back here to chill while I get over this hangover,” he says once he’s dressed.
I smile up at him, threading my fingers in his hair. “Stay here, I’ll be back.”
He shakes his head. “Fuck no. I don’t even want to know how many guys hollered at you while you rushed over here in that, so I’m going to make sure no one else does on the way back.”
I roll my eyes. “Jude, I made it just fine, and you’re dead on your feet. Go to bed. I’ll be back.”
I don’t even know why I wasted my breath, because he pulls me out of the house and we walk, our fingers tangled together, toward the Bullies’ arena. I shiver once the cold air hits me and lean closer into Jude. Pulling off his own long-sleeved shirt, leaving him in a black tank, he hands it over to me, and I smile in thanks before putting it on as we continue to walk.
Wrapping his arm around my shoulders, he pulls me in, kissing my temple before saying, “That shirt looks good on you.”
I look up at him with doubt in my eyes. “It’s huge on me.”
He smiles. “Yeah, but it’s mine and it’s on you. That’s hot.”
Giggling, I cuddle into him, loving the way he smells. It’s a woodsy and spicy smell, and as I bring the collar of his shirt up over my mouth and under my nose, all I smell is him. Looking up at him, I say, “I’m stealing this shirt.”
“That’s fine,” he says and it saddens me how sick he looks. Then again, I hope it teaches him not to be drinking his problems away.
“You look like crap,” I say as he pulls the door open for me.
He nods. “I feel like it.”
As I pass by, he grabs a handful of my butt and I roll my eyes. “Obviously not, since you’re getting frisky.”
He laughs, snaking his arm around my waist and pulling me so that my back is to his chest. Nuzzling his nose in my hair, he whispers, “I’m always up to get frisky when it involves you, baby.”
Butterflies go nuts in my belly as we head toward the dancing room. Kissing my temple, he whispers, “I missed you last night. Did you sleep good?”
Ugh. Nodding, I say, “Just fine.”
“That’s good. Saturday you aren’t getting away. You’re staying to party and then sleeping with me.”
I smile. While I love this side of him, the demanding one, the one that needs me so much he can’t breathe, I love giving him a hard time even more. “Is that a demand or a request?
He smiles in my hair, his teeth tickling my earlobe, and then he says, “Let me reword that.”
“Good idea,” I tease.
“Please, come party with me
Saturday and sleep with me afterward.”
“I think you keep forgetting I’m not one of your quick lays – you have to respect me.”
“No way, I’ve never mistaken you for one,” he says, kissing my neck. “You’re too special.”
Smiling a little too hard, I say, “Well, then good, I’ll be there.”
“That’s right. You better say yes,” he says roughly in my ear before nibbling on my neck and making me weak in the knees. I laugh out loud as we reach the door to the studio. I push it open, trying to get away, but he takes me in his arms, crashing his mouth against mine, slamming me against the door. Moving my hands, I wrap my arms around his neck, holding him tight as we kiss hungrily.
His hands slowly move up my waist and climb up my ribs, but before he can reach my breasts, someone says, “You two aren’t alone.”
Breaking apart, we both look to the side to see Skylar and Rachael sitting on the wall with their phones out in front of them. Rage fills me from the top of my head to the tip of my toes when my eyes meet Rachael’s. She’s wearing a hurt look, almost devastated, and I don’t understand it. Why is she looking at us like that?
“What are you doing?” I ask as Skylar stands, grabbing my bag and clothes to hand to me.
“I wanted to make sure your stuff didn’t get jacked, so I waited. And she wouldn’t leave for some reason, so we’ve been waiting,” she says, and then stretches her arms above her head. “I’m tired. I’m going back to the dorm for a nap.”
“Thank you,” I say as she walks out the door.
“No problem. Be good,” she says, pointing a finger at me. “And you,” she then says to Rachael, “don’t be such a bitch all the time.”
When I look back at Rachael, she’s standing, her arms crossed across her chest, still wearing that look on her face. I ignore her, putting on my clothes because I don’t trust myself to say anything to her. I am still so mad at her and don’t trust her as far as I can throw her. Which wouldn’t be far. It’s just shitty what she did, what she claimed.
While I don’t trust myself to speak to her, Jude must not care because he says, “That was superlow, Rach.”