by Nicola May
‘Are you sure you’re OK?’
The sniff metamorphosed into a huge sob. ‘No, I’m not,’ she wept.
‘Why don’t you come here for a nice hot cup of tea, love?’
‘No, thanks. I’m better off alone.’
‘Come on. I’ve just put another log on the fire.’
‘No. I don’t want to leave the flat.’ Rosa suddenly had a vision of being twelve years old again, when her then foster-parents had informed her that, although they loved her with all their hearts, they weren’t strong enough to deal with her persistent tantrums: this meant she would have to go back into care.
‘Well, I’m coming to you then.’
Mary was greeted at the front door by a red, swollen-faced little girl. ‘I don’t know what you were on about, Mary,’ Rosa told her. ‘The shop lights weren’t on.’
‘Oh, I could have sworn they were.’
‘Drink?’ Rosa offered when they got upstairs to the kitchen. ‘Jack Daniel’s? Wine? Beer?’ She was staggering around. ‘Oh, you don’t, do you? Why don’t you drink, Mary?’
Mary straightened her chubby frame and went to the kettle.
‘Tea for both of us, I think.’
‘I don’t want tea.’
‘Well, go and sit down then, whilst I make myself one.’
Mary handed Rosa a large glass of water, then sat down on the opposite sofa.
‘You can tell me what it is if you want to, love.’
‘I can’t.’
‘Well, I can’t help you then.’
Jack Daniel had reached the sub-conscious level and there was no stopping Rosa’s demons from coming out, floating on a torrent of abuse.
‘Why would you think you could help me, Mary? You haven’t even had a boyfriend before, I expect, stuck living down here with your old gran in your witchy coven.’
‘You shouldn’t drink when you feel sad, Rosa.’
‘You sound like a bloody social worker. I shouldn’t do a lot of things, Mary, but I do, and I have. Somebody once told me never to trust anyone who doesn’t drink, you know.’
‘Did they now?’ Mary shut her eyes for a moment. ‘From that little outburst, I guess this is to do with a boyfriend? So you might as well tell me, now I’m here.’
Rosa rocked to and fro, then let out a massive sob.
‘I went to see the TV that was for sale in Polhampton.’ She ran her hands through her hair. ‘And - and well, there was no TV . . . but there was a wife.’ The word wife came out as a whisper.
Moving to sit next to her, Mary held Rosa’s hand as she howled: ‘He’d told me they were splitting up, but the wife is pregnant, so they can’t be, can they?’
‘Have you asked him that?’
‘Of course I haven’t.’
‘Give me your phone then.’
‘What? Why?’
‘Don’t call him tonight when you are not in your right mind, Rosa. Come on.’ Mary held out her hand. ‘Let me look after it, just for tonight.’
‘No!’ Rosa pushed her hands angrily through her messy curls. ‘I want to call him, but there’s a part of me that doesn’t want to know the truth, as once it’s out, I know that I can never see him again, and that hurts. That hurts so much.’ She began sobbing again. ‘Why does everybody leave me, Mary?’
Gulping down her own emotions, Mary awkwardly crooked Rosa in her arms and began rocking her gently. Rosa was in too much of a state to resist.
‘Do you think it might be a terrible mistake, Mary? Maybe his wife is the liar?’
Mary carried on her rocking motion. ‘Hear these words, young Rosa. Your joy is your sorrow unmasked. The deeper the sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain. Verily you are suspended like scales between your sorrow and joy. Only when you are empty are you at standstill and balance.’
‘Is that some kind of spell?’
‘No, Rosa. They are the words of a man called Kahlil Gibran, from a book called The Prophet. I know you’ve had a tough life, dear, but you’ve got room now for so much joy. People, men . . . will come and go, but take heart from the good ones - because although it may not seem like it at the moment, there are decent people out there. You just need to let them in.’
‘A bit like Hot, I guess. He was badly treated, but look at him now.’ Rosa sniffed loudly.
‘Exactly. All that love you’ve given him, it shows. So don’t you miss out on love for fear of being abandoned. Promise me, Rosa.’
The girl wiggled free from Mary and sat up. An idea had come into her head
‘It was you! You led me to the wrong house on purpose, didn’t you, Mary?’
Mary stood up. ‘No, my child. I led you to the right one.’
CHAPTER 50
‘So, what are you going to do?’ Titch was going through Rosa’s wardrobe looking for baggy tops that might suit her.
‘I actually don’t know.’
‘I’m surprised you didn’t just blurt everything out to his wife. But it’s not her fault she’s married to a dickhead, is it?’
‘No, poor cow. I can’t believe it either. I was drunk too . . . didn’t even phone or do anything, in fact.’
‘Has he contacted you today?’
‘Yep, a text like he sends every day, saying How’s my favourite shop owner this morning?’
‘God, Rosa. I don’t know how you haven’t gone mental at him.’
‘Me neither. Maybe I’m growing up or maybe it’s just I’m not used to getting cheated on. Things never usually get that far.’
‘We need to think of something. Something really good to get him back.’ Titch pulled a blue smock-like dress out of the wardrobe. ‘Ooh, this is nice.’
‘I don’t want him back,’ Rosa said flatly.
‘I don’t mean that, silly. I mean we have to get back at him. How dare he treat you like that, arsehole. But don’t you worry. He won’t get away with this. I shall make him pay for what he’s done.’
‘But how?’
‘I don’t know yet, Rose, but act normal for now. Say you are too busy to see him and that will give us time to hatch a plan. Now, can I borrow this dress, please? It’ll be perfect to hide the bump.’
Rosa flapped her hand dismissively. ‘Yes, yes, take it.’
‘Have you told your Josh?’
‘I need to ring him back, he left me a message this morning. I can’t believe I’m not more upset. It’s like I don’t want to believe it’s real, I suppose.’
‘Did Josh know you were seeing him?’
‘Er . . . yes, I did tell him. Sorry I didn’t tell you, Titch.’
‘It’s OK - I knew you were seeing him, anyway. I know that look of somebody who’s getting regular sex, I do.’
Rosa laughed. ‘We’ve changed roles. Look at you being all chaste now.’
‘The way my bladder is at the moment, it’s a case of having to be. If somebody got within an inch of my foofoo, I’d either be sick or wee on them.’
‘Nice.’ Rosa started to make her bed ‘Do you know what, even Lucas Hannafore told me that Joe was a bad ’un - and that’s coming from him? Takes one to know one.’
‘Taking of Lukey boy, have you heard from him?’
‘Not since Josh kicked his arse, thank goodness.’ Rosa sighed. ‘I don’t know what’s wrong with me lately, I’ve always been so streetwise.’
‘Your heart, that’s what’s wrong with you.’
‘Yes, yes, you’re right. It’s this relationship stuff. I’m no good at it, obviously. I dropped my guard, and I won’t be doing that again.’
‘Good girl. My mum always says, “Follow your heart, but don’t forget to take your brain with you”. About men, she has another saying: “Keep their stomachs full and their balls empty,” but that’s not quite so poetic, is it?’
‘She’s so right.’
‘Yes, but I obviously didn’t take heed of any of her advice!’ They both laughed. ‘OK, Rose.
I’ve got to get the next bus to Polhampton as I’m cleaning there today. You need me here tomorrow though, don’t you?’
‘Yes, please. And Titch?’
‘Yep?’
‘Don’t say anything to anyone about Joe, will you?’
Putting her hands on her hips, Titch faced Rosa head on. ‘When are you going to trust me, Rose? It hurts, that you don’t. I know I’m only young in years, but I’ve got your back, the same as you have mine.’
‘I find it hard to trust, you know that.’ Rosa looked up and away.
‘Hmm. No comment.’ Titch smiled.
‘OK, OK. Hands up. Sorry. I trusted the slippery fox. Now come on, I’ve got to open the shop.’ Leaving Hot upstairs, they made their way to the shop.
‘Just trust the right people, eh?’ Rosa nodded as Titch continued. ‘And keep thinking: we will get that bastard back, not sure how yet, but we will. See you tomorrow.’
‘See you.’
Rosa made her way out to the back kitchen to put the kettle on and promptly burst into tears.
Just as she was blowing her nose, Josh called.
‘Rosalar, how’s it hanging?’
Rosa sniffed loudly. ‘It’s hanging all right.’
‘Oh petal, what’s the matter? You’re not crying, are you?’
‘You know I only cry when I peel onions. I’ve got a bit of a cold, that’s all.’
‘Aw. Well, don’t work too hard. How are sales going anyway?’
‘Couldn’t be better. The funky dog collars are flying out of the door, and it’s proved such a good idea, having the kids’ trinkets. People are emailing me, putting in advanced dog food orders, so that side of things is amazing.’
‘How’s lover boy?’
‘Oh.’ Rosa paused, then said flatly, ‘He’s all right.’
‘Are you sure?’
Rosa felt agitation rising within her; she wasn’t ready for a Josh ‘I told you so’.
‘Yes, Josh, I’m sure. How’s Lovely Lucy?’
‘She’s all right too.’
‘Good.’ Rosa made an effort. ‘You’ll have to bring her down to the big bad bay so that I can meet her.’
‘Er . . . maybe. I’d rather come down on my own, to be honest. We can have a laugh, especially as it will soon be warm enough to go on the beach. How’s Hot, is he fully recovered?’
‘Yes, vocal as ever. He’s fine.’ At that moment the little sausage barked. ‘That’s him, saying hello.’
‘Aw. I do miss him - and no clever remarks, I miss you too. But now you’re all loved up and stuff, well, I guess Mr Gazette is your number one man and us City types need to take a back seat.’
‘No, Josh. My number one man has four legs and a tail.’
‘Jokes! Right, I’d better get back to work. What are you doing for your birthday, by the way?’
Rosa realised that her dirty weekend away would now not be happening. God, what yarn did Joe have to spin to his poor wife, to get an overnight pass? Again, how foolish was she not to pick up on the fact that in the six weeks she’d been with him, Joe had never once stayed over!
‘I’ve nothing planned as it happens, so why don’t you come down then? Easter weekend this year, I’ll have to work during some of it, but you can help me if you like? It’ll be fun. And . . . if you do want to bring Lucy, I’m sure that Jacob and Raff will put you up, or you are very welcome to stay here, although I guess she might not want to?’
‘Hmm, she has got five-star tastes, this one. Even the Lobster Pot might not be to her liking.’
The words ‘stuck up cow’ flew through Rosa’s mind. ‘Whatever, Josh, just let me know.’
CHAPTER 51
Rosa stared at the ringing phone that was on the kitchen side. She had ignored Joe’s texts for two days, and now the ‘treat ’em mean, keep ’em keen’ motto was working in full force. It was the third time he had called that morning. Bracing herself, she picked it up and answered it.
‘Joe.’
‘Oh, you are alive, then? I had visions of you with your feet sticking out from under crates of dog food that had fallen on you.’
‘Well, you didn’t come to find me or I could still be lying there with Hot starting to eat my toes for sausages.’
‘Ha! Aw, I’ve missed you, sexy one. How are you doing?’
‘I’m fine, just been ultra-busy. I’ve got a new line of leads in and have been creating an ad to put in the Gazette as it goes.’
‘Well, how about I get it put in for free, for you?’
‘That’s kind and also slightly strange. You never do deals on that blasted paper, I hear.’
‘For you, Rosa. I would do anything. I was going to pop in later, if that’s OK? I’ve got some flowers for you that have been sitting in my car for two days.’
Rosa gulped down a ‘Yeah, right.’ And replaced it with, ‘Anyone would think you’ve got a guilty conscience, Mr Fox. Free ads? Flowers?’
Joe tutted. ‘Don’t be daft. I’ve missed you, that’s all. And you’re the one not picking up your phone.’
‘Been busy running around with all the boys in the bay, you know me.’ Rosa now had an ‘if looks could kill’ type of face on. ‘Look, I can’t see you today, Joe. I’m really up against it and have promised Jacob a couple of shifts this week as his sister and Brad are away.’
‘Well, maybe I can come in and see you there sometime?’
‘Not a good idea. I’ll be in the kitchen, helping Raff. I’ll call you, I promise.’
‘Smells like you don’t want to see me.’ Joe sounded downhearted.
‘No, just smells of Rosa’s busy . . . see what I did there?’
‘You’ll go far,’ Joe acknowledged.
‘See you, Joe.’ Then when the call had closed, she added: ‘And you’ll go to hell.’
CHAPTER 52
Josh sat at his desk and Googled the Corner Shop, Cockleberry Bay. He was so proud of Rosa. From being someone who had no regard for herself or where she was going, she had completely turned her life around. Whoever had put their trust in her and left her the shop must have known what they were doing. They had lifted not only her spirits but had given her joie de vivre and a focus. Jacob was a good bloke too; he had created the website for her and with her - just a simple DIY one, but it looked great, and the fact that Rosa was now advertising phone and email orders on there was fantastic.
He had meant to ask her if she’d got any further clues on who had left her the shop, as he was sure that the Cockleberry gossip train must know something. He also wanted an update on the hit-and-run, which he guessed had been put to rest now. Everything pointed to Lucas: it had to have been him.
Josh was slightly concerned because Rosa had sounded a bit down on the phone. He wondered if something was wrong. But surely, if things weren’t going well with her fella, she would have told him. Maybe she just needed to see a familiar face. He would surprise her. Go down on her birthday weekend. He had been spending a lot more time with Lucy lately and knew she wouldn’t be best pleased if he said she was going to see Rosa, especially at Easter. But he could just tell her that he was doing something rugby-related with Carlton. Yes, that’s what he would do. She’d understand.
He picked up the phone to call Jacob. He would book a special birthday meal for Rosa at the Lobster Pot and include Jacob and Raff. Get them to bake a cake. Make it a birthday to remember.
CHAPTER 53
The delicious smell of roast dinner cooking greeted Rosa as Mary opened the door to Seaspray Cottage.
‘Hello, come in, come in.’
At the sight of a visitor, Merlin screeched and flew between Rosa’s legs, nearly knocking her off-balance in his bid to escape. Mary did her lopsided walk straight through to the kitchen and did a quick check of the oven.
‘Thanks for coming, Rosa. Hopefully, it won’t take too long to go through Gran’s things, but . . . well, I didn’t fancy doing it on my own.’
‘It’s fine, Mary, I’m happy to help.’
‘How are you feeling after the other night?’
‘A bit better, I think.’
‘Have you spoken to him?’
‘Yes, but only to stop him constantly calling and to tell him I’m too busy to see him at the moment. Titch and I are hatching a plan to ensure he gets his comeuppance.’
‘Oh.’ Mary opened a cupboard and reached for the gravy granules. ‘Are you sure that’s the right thing to do?’
‘Probably not, but why should he get away with it? Little shit.’
‘Right,’ Mary said, looking at her watch: ‘we’ve got forty-five minutes to get some stuff sorted before I put the Yorkshires in.’
Queenie Cobb’s bedroom was every bit how Rosa had imagined it to be. Dark, with dream catchers and crystals on every available space. It wasn’t dusty though, Mary obviously kept a tight ship where cleaning was concerned. There was a magnificent throw on the old mahogany sleigh bed; it was navy-blue and covered in white stars and moons.
Rosa gasped when she saw it. ‘I bloody love that throw!’
‘Well, have it then.’
‘Are you sure - you might want it?’
‘I have one already. I want to make this room clean and clear now. I’m even going to sell the bed. I want just the big rocking chair in here, so I can sit and read. It’s too damn draughty in that kitchen, even with the fire going.’
Between them, the two women had soon made two piles: one for the charity shop and one for the rubbish bin. They handled the clothes with reverence.
‘I can manage the rest, dear, the shoes and the other bits and bobs, but thank you so much for your help. I’m glad that Gran was cremated in her favourite long amethyst velvet dress and daisy patterned shawl.’
Mary coughed and became a little breathless. She reached for an inhaler from her apron pocket.
‘I didn’t know you used an inhaler.’
‘Yes, love. My breathing’s not so good today. I don’t think Gran going has helped me, quite frankly.’