“Close your eyes, gorgeous.” Niall’s voice caressed Jonathan’s ear with each syllable. Jonathan did as the man said. Niall was darker than the rest. He always watched Jonathan with something akin to hatred.
“I don’t hate you. Don’t open your eyes.”
The man’s arms encircled him. Water splashed. He could smell the bitter taint of copper. Did the water run red with blood from today’s victims? Would this man kill him? Jonathan kept his breathing steady by force of will alone.
“I have no intention of harming you.”
“Stay out of my head,” Jonathan said out of habit.
Niall’s hot breath brushed the shell of Jonathan’s ear. “Unlike Cin, I don’t have a choice. He can control it. I hear everything. All the time. It’s never quiet anywhere I go.”
Jonathan’s heart squeezed in his chest. That sounded like hell. He loved the quiet.
“You can open your eyes now.”
Jonathan’s lids lifted. His gaze dropped to the hands boxing him in against the counter. They were red from Niall scrubbing them. Splotches of blood still speckled the inside of the sink. Niall immediately rinsed them away.
“You’re too nice for this life,” Niall said. His tone sounded conversational, but Jonathan didn’t know how to feel. The man was obviously trying to protect him from the ugliness of the day. Yet he didn’t move away, making Jonathan wonder over his intentions.
“Where’s Cin?”
“Ensuring we weren’t followed. You know he’ll wipe your memories again, right? He loves you too much to let you stay.” Jonathan understood then. He was being held captive for Niall’s lecture. “I see everything inside your head and everything inside his. No one can shut me out. If you want to leave here with your memories intact, you’ll…” Niall paused. His weight increased against Jonathan’s back. As Jonathan looked on, a fresh trail of blood ran down Niall’s arm into the sink. He stared at the flow in confusion. Horror sank in. It had been Niall’s own blood he’d been washing away.
“Apologizes. Didn’t realize I was so weak.”
Jonathan spun in Niall’s hold. “Holy shit. You’re hurt.” He went hunting for wounds, but Niall pushed his hands away.
“Nay worry ov’r me,” Niall said, his brogue thickening in his weakness.
Jonathan couldn’t let this go. Instead of trying to tend to Niall’s wounds, Jonathan pulled the neck of his shirt down and turned his head, offering Niall his throat. “Take my blood, then.”
“Cin… “
“No one owns me,” Jonathan said, sounding more bitter than he intended. “Plus, you’re hurt. That takes priority.”
“He woul’ nay care. You’re his.”
A loud growl—like nothing Jonathan had ever heard before—rent the air, followed by gunfire. Jonathan jumped. Niall let out a string of curses Jonathan had never heard but knew were bad. Niall moved as if to push away. Jonathan snagged his shirt, stopping him.
“Take my blood first. You’re no good to anyone if you keel over.” Niall’s golden gaze met his. He felt the man’s hesitation. “It’s not like it’s sexual or anything. Just do it,” Jonathan said, exposing his neck once more.
Niall shifted closer. His hot breath brushed Jonathan’s skin before his mouth opened over Jonathan’s pulse. Goosebumps rose on Jonathan’s skin. Their bodies collided as Niall’s fangs pierced Jonathan’s skin. Jonathan made a terrible discovery. He’d been wrong. It was sexual. He’d always believed the way he felt when Cin took his blood was due to their relationship, but he’d never been more wrong about anything in his life. Niall’s hard cock dug into Jonathan’s hip. Jonathan tried holding still. The temptation to rub against the man like a cat was a real thing. His erection beat a pattern against the inside of his jeans, leaking and begging for relief. He hovered on the edge of orgasm, and if Niall didn’t stop soon, Jonathan feared coming in his jeans was a real possibility. Niall licked the puncture marks, sealing them. Jonathan thought he might have whimpered. It was out of his control. Their gazes met. Jonathan wondered if the vampire would kiss him. The back door flew open. Splintering wood flew in every direction. Niall leapt away from Jonathan, pulling his blade from his belt and placing himself between Jonathan and the demons pouring inside.
Without thought, Jonathan went for the butcher’s block, and grabbed the largest knife he could find. It never occurred to him he should run. This was his clan. They were in danger. His fear meant nothing in the face of that knowledge. He would fight. A red and yellow set of eyes locked on to him. Images so horrific that Jonathan almost hit his knees raced through his mind. Evil and sulfur coated the air, choking Jonathan. Terrifying screams of the long dead sounded in Jonathan’s ears. They were real, but they weren’t. It was an echo of past sins, consuming Jonathan. Four vampire warriors stood at his side, and still Jonathan’s knees tried buckling under the fear and mental torment. Those poor women never stood a chance. In a blinding moment of clarity, he understood everything—why Cin’s job was so much more important than their relationship, and how Jonathan would soon be dead. He saw his death as clearly as if it had happened already. Perhaps Dougal had been right after all. Jonathan had some form of extra-human ability of sight. As the thought passed through his head, a cool pressure touched his neck a half second before a sharp pain sliced through his throat, tearing away his ability to swallow or breathe. The floor rushed up to meet him. Shouts, growls, and gunfire continued around him. It all sounded as if coming from inside a long tunnel. Nothing felt real. There was a huge disconnect from reality that Jonathan couldn’t penetrate. Niall’s face appeared above him. The man looked so different than he had only minutes earlier when Jonathan had been so certain Niall was about to kiss him.
“Cin,” Niall yelled. “I need you to tell me what to do. Mercy or damnation?”
There was no air. Jonathan cupped his throat, choking. He didn’t feel the pain any longer, only the suffocating. The world turned hazy around the edges. Life was slipping away. He wanted Cin. Niall looked freaked. He’d never seen the man anything other than eerily calm. That was how Jonathan knew there was no hope. He was dead.
“Niall, do not let my man die,” Cin yelled, sounding winded.
The man hovering over him focused on Jonathan. Everything went calm. There still was no air, but the fear slipped away. Niall’s eyes glowed yellow for a moment. “Damnation it is,” Niall said in a quiet tone. The man’s hand rose to his mouth. His fangs extended, ripping open his wrist. Niall pushed Jonathan’s hands away from his slashed throat. Warmth dripped into the wound, reminding him of the pain he’d thought was gone. Niall glanced over his shoulder. “Cin, finish this. You know I cannot.”
Cin came into sight. He was covered in sweat and blood. “Switch,” he yelled. In a flash, Niall shot to his feet, taking over the man’s fight while Cin dropped to his knees next to Jonathan. His gaze moved over Jonathan. “Och, baby. I never wanted this for you, but I can’t let you die. Losing you would destroy me.”
He tried opening his mouth and telling Cin he didn’t want to die either, but no sound emerged.
Cin shook his head. “Don’t try to talk. I need you to do something. You won’t like it.” Just as Niall had, Cin used his fangs to rip open his wrist. Unlike Niall, Cin pressed his sliced wrist to Jonathan’s mouth. “You have to drink my blood, baby. If you don’t, you’ll die. If you do drink it, you also won’t be like me, but you will be trapped with me.”
Jonathan didn’t hesitate. Hot metallic liquid filled his mouth. He was too out of it to think about anything other than surviving. Not only did Jonathan like living, he wanted to be with Cin forever. He’d known all along that would mean—one day—he’d have to give up his humanity. Jonathan tried swallowing. Nothing happened. The panic in Cin’s expression said as much as the darkness crowding Jonathan’s vision. Now, not only did everything sound like he was in a tunnel, it looked like it too. He tried focusing on Cin’s gorgeous eyes. His vision wouldn’t clear. There was no fear or pain, only exhausti
on. His lungs burned from lack of oxygen. When the darkness settled over him, carrying him away, all Jonathan felt any longer was relief.
4
“Do you plan to lounge around forever?”
Jonathan glanced around at the shadows surrounding him. Niall appeared like smoke, taking the shape of a man before solidifying. Jonathan glanced down. He needed to know if he looked the same. Unlike Niall, his body was still solid but didn’t feel real—like being trapped in a dream. The last thing he remembered was struggling for air. That didn’t seem to be a problem any longer.
“Am I dead?”
Niall’s mouth lifted in one corner. “No.”
He glanced around again at his slightly less than clear surroundings. Nothing seemed to have a solid form, other than them. “Is this a dream?”
“Do you want it to be?”
Jonathan shook his head, trying to clear away the cobwebs. “I’m not sure.”
A full-blown smile exploded across Niall’s face. The breath caught at the back of Jonathan’s throat. He’d never seen Niall smile. It was mesmerizing. He had dimples. “Aye, well, if you’d like, you can tell yourself this was a dream when you open your eyes and rejoin the living.”
“So I am dreaming?” Jonathan asked again, trying to keep up.
Niall sighed. “How about you just listen for a few minutes?”
Jonathan nodded, at a loss as to what else he could do but obey.
Niall crossed his arms over his massive chest and rocked back on his heels, as if trying to decide where to start. Jonathan stood still, expecting anything. A part of him still suspected he might be dead and this was all part of his trip to the afterlife.
“We got interrupted the last time we spoke,” Niall said, taking Jonathan by surprise with his choice of topic. “You had questions you didn’t get to ask.”
“Did I?” So much had happened in such a short period of time, Jonathan couldn’t remember. Dying had wiped him clean.
“Aye,” Niall said, holding his gaze. “You wanted to know why I thought you should leave us behind, but you were scared to ask.”
“I don’t know if scared is the right term.”
Niall blew out a breath and shook his head at Jonathan’s rambling. “I thought you were going to listen.”
Jonathan motioned for him to continue. “Sorry. Go on.”
“For whatever reason, you didn’t want to ask,” Niall said, conceding to Jonathan’s interruption. “When you open your eyes, you may not see me for a little while, so I wanted to answer your questions before I go.”
“Where are you going?”
“Away,” Niall answered, obviously not intending to expound. “Don’t worry. We have forever and some years will go by in the blink of an eye while others will drag on for what feels like an eternity.”
So they’d turned him after all. He wanted to ask, but Niall didn’t give him a chance.
“I didn’t want this for you. It’s not personal. I wouldn’t want this for anyone. Our clan is small, and now you’re completely dependent upon us for survival for the rest of your days. We were born this way. You were not. Most of the skills we possess won’t pass to you, and drinking human blood will not sustain you. You’ll need to drink from one of us to live. That’s what I didn’t say to you before we were interrupted.”
“Are you saying you don’t want me sucking on your neck the way I let you suck on mine?” Jonathan asked, trying to ease the heaviness coating the air.
Something dark—like deep hunger—passed over Niall’s features. “Anytime you need me, you may call to me and I will come to you.”
For some reason, one Jonathan couldn’t explain, that sounded oddly ominous.
“There are a million tiny details about this life you need to understand. You’ll have to learn a whole new way of living. Cin will be with you every step of the way.”
“Why isn’t he here now?”
“Who says he isn’t?” Niall shot back just as quickly, causing Jonathan to have more questions than before.
“Why are you here now?”
Niall moved closer, crowding Jonathan’s space. Jonathan let it happen. The man’s golden gaze flared to life, glowing bright, as if attempting to dig for info Jonathan didn’t want to give. “I told you—I have to go away, and you had another question I didn’t get to answer.”
“What?” Jonathan had no idea why he was whispering, but there it was.
“You wondered if I would do this,” Niall said, swooping in and covering Jonathan’s mouth with his. The giant vamp’s kiss was a hell of a lot sweeter than Jonathan ever would’ve imagined. He gently cupped Jonathan’s face between his hands, as if savoring the moment. In the back of his mind, Jonathan knew he should shove Niall away. This wasn’t fair to Cin. He didn’t want anyone other than Cin. Did he? Fuck it. As Niall had said earlier, this was just a dream. Soon he’d open his eyes and realize none of this had been real, or the angel of death would appear, escorting Jonathan to his final resting place. Either way, this moment didn’t count. Jonathan kissed Niall back. It wasn’t like when he kissed Cin or even when Niall had taken his blood. Their tongues met and stroked. There was a definite lover-like feel to their touch, but it wasn’t the sort of passion that burned a person to the ground. This was something else.
Niall was the first to pull away. With his eyes closed, Jonathan held on to the man’s shirt, keeping him in place. Not that Niall seemed in any hurry to escape. He kept his forehead pressed to Jonathan’s and his breaths came in loud gasps. Jonathan could feel the man’s large frame expanding with every deep lungful of air. Every sensation seemed heightened—twice as much as anything he’d ever experienced before.
“Eternity is a damn long time, Jonathan,” Niall said softly. “Even if you spend it hating me, I swear I’ll come to you when you call.” The same as he appeared, Niall disappeared—like smoke seeping away. Jonathan stared at the empty space where he’d been only moments earlier. He didn’t have time to puzzle out the experience.
The sensation of light kisses touched his stomach. Jonathan glanced down at this body. His shirt was gone. Hadn’t a gray t-shirt been covering him the last he looked? The pressure of lips skimming his stomach happened again. Jonathan automatically lifted his hand, searching for the source. It landed on something solid. Soft locks of hair slipped across his palm. Jonathan blinked. Light blinded him. He slammed his eyes closed against the assault. The kisses moved up his body. The sensation of floating overcame him.
Jonathan’s eyes fluttered open once more. This time, he prepared himself. It wasn’t as bright this time. In fact, there was barely any light at all. He was in Cin’s bed. Jonathan slipped his fingers through the man’s hair once more.
“Cin?” He instantly regretted his attempt as speaking. It felt like he’d swallowed razor blades and sounded like it too.
“Aye, baby. You’re finally awake.”
“Hurt,” he croaked out, hoping Cin wouldn’t expect more.
“Don’t try talking. You’re still healing.”
But I have questions. Jonathan couldn’t contain his internal pout. He’d expected things to be different. No pain, for one damn thing.
And I have answers, but there’s plenty of time.
Jonathan nearly levitated in his happiness. Oh my God. I heard you. In my head, and you heard me. Holy shit. We spoke.
A low chuckle caressed Jonathan’s chest as Cin kissed a path up his body. “Trust me, baby. The novelty will wear off soon.”
I saw Niall. In my dreams. Does that mean it was real?
While straddling Jonathan’s hips, Cin sat back on his heels and stared down at him. Something dark passed over his features. “Aye, most likely.”
He said he was leaving.
“Aye.” Cin looked sad.
Jonathan’s chest hurt—like he was missing a part of himself. He couldn’t make it stop. He blinked against the sudden onslaught of pain.
Cin slid down, wrapping Jonathan in his hold, as if trying to
hold him together for a mental break he knew would soon come. “I’m so so verra sorry,” Cin whispered. His brogue thickened. “Something went wrong when I tried saving you. My blood wouldn’t heal you. Niall had to be the one. Your bond to him will be stronger than what you feel for me.”
The pressure in Jonathan’s chest increased by the second—like he could sense Niall moving farther away. Nothing could ever be stronger than what I feel for you. Jonathan ran his fingers through Cin’s hair, trying to ease the man he loved even as his heart slowly crushed from an invisible weight.
“It’s okay. I’d rather have some of you than none.”
“Kiss me,” Jonathan croaked out, because he couldn’t take the pain in Cin’s voice any longer. He fucking hated that the man he loved more than he had his life was apologizing for doing what had to be done to save him.
Cin shifted positions until no more than an inch separated their faces. “Eternity is a damn long time.”
That’s the same thing Niall said. Please kiss me.
“He wasn’t exaggerating. I’ve been alive going on seven hundred years and it took me this long to find you. I love you.”
A smile pulled at Jonathan’s lips. Some of the tension in his chest eased. “I love you too,” Jonathan mouthed because it hurt too much to say it. Instead of asking again, Jonathan pulled Cin’s head down and captured the man’s lips. The instant their tongues met, a crack formed in his mind, splitting Jonathan in two. He loved this man so goddamn much, yet a roar of denial still sounded in his ears, so loud it almost seemed real. Jonathan wasn’t the furious one. It was Niall.
Consume (Hellish Book 1) Page 4