by Lily Zante
The night was long and at some point she dozed off. When she opened her eyes again, it was way past midnight.
Had he fallen asleep?
She got up and tip-toed to the bedroom, and looked around for her bag and her phone. Ruben would never call her or contact her, they had an unspoken agreement, but she had to get word to him that she couldn’t meet anymore.
It wasn’t only that she couldn’t. She didn’t want to.
It wasn’t only because Carlos had turned up unexpectedly. Kissing Ruben had been wrong, she’d known it the moment their lips had touched. It was like Christmas Eve—which was better than Christmas Day. The anticipation of the thing hadn’t lived up to what she’d felt and dreamed about in her imagination.
Why had it taken this to happen for her to discover that her heart was with Carlos? Ruben had merely been the wake-up call. She had to get word to him to stay away, out of touch. She had to set things right between her and Carlos.
Opening the door to the bedroom, she walked in and nearly jumped with fright when she caught him looking at her. His eyes were wide open and he gave her the strangest of looks. One that made her heart do an uneasy jig especially when he looked at her as though he could see right through her. She flinched.
“You took a long time,” she said, examining his face. “It’s past midnight. I was waiting for you.”
“You didn’t have to wait up.”
He got out of bed, leaving Tori lying on the bed beside him and walked out to get his suitcase.
Didn’t have to wait up?
When he walked back in again a few seconds later, he didn’t even stop to look at her and instead crouched on the floor and opened his suitcase.
“I needed to get changed,” she said, “I didn’t want to disturb you.” She walked over to the side of the bed where Tori was sleeping and began to lift her out of the bed.
“Don’t,” he warned her, glancing over his shoulder. “Leave her there.”
She frowned. “She sleeps better in the cot.”
“You met your friends, did you?” he asked, ignoring her comment and turning his back to her as he rifled through his suitcase.
“Yes,” she replied, slowly. Where was he going with this? “If I’d known you were going to surprise us I wouldn’t have—”
“Who was it?”
“Just some of the suppliers I met.”
He said nothing then and she wondered what had made him ask in the first place. The big soft cuddly Carlos she knew wouldn’t concern himself with such trivia. Her stomach quivered as though an army of earwigs was marching its way out.
“Do you mind sleeping in the other room?” he asked. “I’ve missed Tori.”
She was too shocked to remind him of their rules about sleeping with the baby in the bed instead of in the cot. Carlos had never ever asked her to sleep anywhere other than in his bed. Blood throbbed along the side of her temples and she slowly walked over to him with a million questions poised on the tip of her tongue. Self-restraint prevented her from bursting out with them for she dared not trigger any suspicion on her part. But her motherly instincts wouldn’t let the matter lie. “Are you sure you want her in the bed? It’s just that you’re probably really tired with the flight and all and—”
“She’ll be fine.”
“Just be careful you don’t squash her.”
“I’m very careful. As careful as you are.” The look he gave her was even colder than the tone of his voice. Already he felt like a stranger to her; this was a new side to Carlos and it frightened her.
“We leave in the morning, me and Tori. Around nine. But I could leave her at home with you if you want to take her for the day?”
“You take her. I’ll probably sleep in.”
She collected her night clothes and walked out, feeling strange that he’d traveled all this way and that they’d been apart for nearly a month and hadn’t even hugged or kissed one another despite him having flown thousands of miles to surprise her.
She dressed quickly and quietly the next morning and got Tori dressed too. Carlos was awake but from the gaunt expression on his face it didn’t look as though he’d slept much.
He was cold and surly and she had the feeling that jetlag had nothing to do with this.
“Aren’t you getting up?” she asked, as she changed Tori’s clothes.
“I’m on vacation. Remember?”
She attempted a smile. “It’s great that you came early. Ava will be happy.”
“And you’re not?”
She looked up surprised. “Of course I am. I can’t believe you came out so early.”
“I bet you can’t.”
Her smile slipped. “I’m real happy to see you, Carlos, you just seem a little …angry. What is it?” She walked over to him with Tori in her arms and looked down at him. He lay in bed resting his interlaced hands behind his head.
“Is there a problem, Carlos?”
“You tell me.”
He stared at her with his large brown eyes, only they weren’t as soft as usual. The gaze he gave her was hard, like flint, and she scratched her cheek, already feeling her appetite for breakfast vanish.
“If you didn’t want to come here so early, I don’t know why you bothered.”
“I’m thinking that same thing myself. I came because I thought we could spend time together as a family.”
“And that’s changed now?” She was pushing it, she knew that. Because he was clearly pissed off about something. Yet there was no way he would know about her night out yesterday.
He remained silent.
“I’m really happy you’re here. What we need is family time.”
“I bet it is.”
She couldn’t understand his mood, maybe the jetlag had made him grouchy—otherwise she was sure he’d have taken Tori. Jetlag, maybe that’s all it was.
“I’ll see you later,” she said, bending over to give him a kiss.
“Da-da,” said Tori.
Chapter 22
He wanted to grab this ‘Ruben’ by the neck and twist it all the way around. Such were Carlos’ first thoughts of the day when he opened his eyes. His muscles were tight and the burning sensation in his chest and stomach whittled away at him, slowly eating away at his good nature.
He had spent the night in a mess of swirling suspicion with the image of his wife with another man uppermost in his mind. Three times he’d woken up and almost gone to her room to challenge her.
Three times he’d wanted to smack his fist into the wall. He’d never faced anything like this before. Had never dreamed of it. Had never seen it coming. He’d always spent his time and energy working hard so he could give her what she wanted. It didn’t leave much free time for anything else.
Overnight he became suspicious about everything, past and present. He wondered what she did at Ava’s apartment on the days when she’d worked long hours? Had she been emailing the guy? Calling him even? His friends always told him how lucky he was—that he had such a hot wife, that after so many years of being married, and with a kid, she still looked so good. Up until last night he had considered himself a lucky man but doubts, as deadly as mustard gas, had crept into his pores and slowly poisoned his senses. The existence of this ‘Ruben’ made his life hell. Carlos clenched his jaw and wondered what the fucker look like.
How far had she gone?
How could she look at him so calmly, as though everything was fine? He even found himself wondering what went on at the girls’ nights out.
He didn’t know what to believe, or who to trust. Only that he couldn’t trust her.
She’d left this morning with Tori and he was left to stew in a pool of suspicion. Not only had he read his wife’s text messages—and discovered exactly what she’d been up to without him around—but he’d gone and deleted them too. She had no idea that he knew.
Carlos got up and turned his neck to the side, hearing the crack. What a shit awful start to his vacation.
So much for surp
rising her.
So much for spending family time together.
So much for wanting to make things better.
So much for everything.
With his hopes relegated to the trash can, he was now at a loss for what to do. He hadn’t slept a wink last night—not one goddamn wink. All he’d done was lie awake listening to Tori’s gentle snoring and her breathing, and the cute little noises and sucking motions she made when she drank milk from a bottle. It was funny to watch her doing that when she had no bottle in her mouth. Often, he and Rona would lie there and watch her while breaking into fits of giggles.
Overtired beyond comprehension, his eyes were dry, as though slivers of metal skidded all over them. The best solution would be to get some sleep so that when he woke up he would be in a better state of mind. So that he could go to the hotel and confront her. But sleep didn’t come easily when his mind was in such a state of flux.
He’d ask her straight up who the hell Ruben was and then he’d find the man and grind him to mincemeat.
How long had this been going on? He sat up in bed and rubbed his eyes. Was this a new affair? Or was it something that had started before—like the last time she’d been here. Could it have started a few months ago? It was more than a possibility. The more he thought about it, the more it all fit into place. No goddamn wonder she’d been different since she’d returned to Denver.
This was the reason why.
This business with Ruben wasn’t new. It was a continuation.
He kicked his bag of toiletries and howled with rage when he stubbed his toe on the metal edge of the suitcase.
“Shhiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitttttttttttt!” he yelped and hopped around to the bed. This wasn’t a vacation by any shape or form, and this was only the first day. He didn’t dare to think how bad things would be by the time the wedding came around.
Screw staying around for the whole month—how could he when his wife had been screwing around on him? He would take Tori and return to Denver soon after the wedding. But a few moments later, even in his slow simmering rage, he knew he couldn’t. Who would look after her when he was at work?
He needed a shower. All thought of sleep was abandoned as he figured out his plan. First he would shower, and then he would go straight to the Casa Adriana.
Chapter 23
“Good morning!” Gina greeted her with her usual bubbly enthusiasm. Rona’s misery deepened. It was a sin for anyone to be this happy when she felt so depressed herself.
“You are here early?” Gina asked.
“Too much work to do.” Rona muttered with one hand on the stroller. She hadn’t even had time to feed Tori or have her own breakfast; such had been her desire to leave the pensione where the air cackled with too much tension.
She was as miserable as hell and knew she wasn’t going to get pity or sympathy from any quarter. This had been all her own doing. She’d give anything to be back in Denver where her lifeline—her friends—were only a phone call away. They’d help her to get through this period of misery. They would dissect, cogitate, analyze, tear down and inspect everything and give her their final conclusion. Of course they’d take her side not because she was in the right but because they were her friends.
It was that kind of unconditional, saturated, honey sweet support she needed now. Only she wasn’t going to get it from anyone here.
She didn’t know how she was going to get through the next few weeks with her family getting together for Ava and Nico’s big day. Her heart sank at the thought of it.
“Did Tori keep you up?” Gina asked, smiling at the baby. “You look tired today.”
“Something like that.” There was no way she could admit to the truth even though Gina might be the only person on the planet right now to listen to her impartially. She was trustworthy, honest and diplomatic and probably the closest thing that Rona had to a friend but she had to walk away and suffer alone the heavy load on her chest.
“Ava called earlier to say that she and Nico will be back before lunch.”
Great.
Rona felt the skin around her eyes tighten. She didn’t need any more dynamics added to the mix.
“Back so soon?”
Gina nodded.
“I need to give Tori breakfast,” said Rona. She was eager to sit down and collect her thoughts. “Will you tell Lizzi that I’m in the conservatory when she comes in?”
“Certainly.”
Rona pushed the stroller into the conservatory and ordered some toast and cereal. “And some hot water too, with a jug of water.” She told the waiter, who knew her peculiar requirement for making up formula milk.
“Milk coming,” she told Tori. Her daughter smiled in delight at the mention of the magic word.
She took out her cell phone and sent Ruben a message:
Please don’t contact me. I know you won’t but right now is not a good time.
It would have to do for now. At a later day she would explain how she felt and that whatever they had shared didn’t feel right. But she needed him to stay away for now and preferably until the wedding was over.
Lizzi turned up a little later and took over giving breakfast to Tori so that Rona could eat hers in peace.
“Was your grandfather angry that you were so late?” Rona asked her while Tori grabbed Lizzi’s ponytail and pulled it gently.
“No honey, don’t do that.” Rona chided her.
“It’s fine—and no my grandfather didn’t say anything. Is your husband feeling better today?”
“He’s tired. The flight was long and …” She didn’t know what else to say. Lizzi smiled and Rona left it at that. She downed her breakfast quickly and disappeared into the office again.
She busied herself in her work and immediately set about responding to various emails from Ava and Kim, as well as those from suppliers. Sometimes she wondered if being in Ava’s office, which had once been Nico’s office, had somehow transferred the DNA from those hard-working people to her. These days she was more focussed, often concentrating hard on her work with an unerring desire to get everything done on her list. She was so busy that she didn’t even hear the text that sounded on her phone.
The morning flew by and before she knew it she’d dealt with all outstanding queries. Needing a break she decided to see what Lizzi and Tori were up to and was informed by the receptionist that the girls were in the gardens. Rona started to make her way there and saw Gina coming out of the conservatory.
“Rona?”
Her heart stopped mid-beat at the sound of his voice. What was he doing here?
She turned around as the color slowly seeped from her face to her feet.
She rushed towards him conscious that Gina was looking at them both.
“What are you doing here?” She whispered, annoyed and irritated.
“I told you I’d come by at lunchtime.”
She scrunched up his face. “When?”
“I sent you a text.”
“I sent you a text and told you not to contact me.” She told him.
“I replied.”
She gritted her teeth. She’d been too busy to check her phone. “Why are you here? I thought we had an unspoken agreement not to—” she swiftly led him out of the hotel and to the parking lot.
“What unspoken agreement?” he asked.
“What is it?” She asked, irritated by his presence here of all places. It was a sheer fluke that Ava wasn’t around to witness this.
“I was worried about you. You never replied to my texts last night and then you send that one this morning.”
“You texted me last night?” Alarm bells went off in her head.
He nodded. “I wanted to know you were okay. Things between us—”
“Last night? You texted me last night?”
“Yes.”
“I didn’t get them.”
He shrugged. “I sent them.”
Her insides roiled. If he sent them and she didn’t get them, it meant that Carlos had intercep
ted them.
“What did you say?” she asked slowly.
“Here,” he said, “If you don’t believe me,”
She read the texts through a mist of haze then closed her eyes, slowly exhaling. She opened her eyes again, confounded. “What have you done?” Now she understood why Carlos had been so angry. It all made sense: his mood, his questions and the way he’d looked at her. He’d not only read the texts and thought the worst. He knew she’d lied to him.
“What’s wrong?” asked Ruben, his eyes wide with fear at her reaction.
“You shouldn’t have contacted me. You shouldn’t have. You’ve made things much, much worse.” She was never going to get herself out of this mess. Not in a million years. Carlos would never believe her, even though it was the truth that she’d regretted her indiscretion.
“Rona?” Ruben placed his hand over hers.
“Don’t touch me!” she shrieked.
“What is it?” he asked. Then anger, “You weren’t so quick to rebuff me yesterday.”
“I didn’t lead you on.”
“You didn’t?” He mocked her.
“No! I didn’t. Why would you think that? We were friends.”
“We were friends and we…didn’t you feel it? Didn’t you feel what we had?”
“Feel what?” Her head felt dizzy. This heated exchange out here would draw attention if anybody walked past them and she was thankful that neither Ava nor Nico were in the area.
“You felt something.” He insisted.
She stared at him as though he’d lost his mind. “We were friends, Ruben. Friends and nothing more.”
“You seriously believe that? How can two people be friends?”
“But that’s what we talked about.”
“Is that how you kiss your friends?”
“You kissed me.”
He frowned. “You kept falling into me, brushing your hands against mine, bumping into me. The way you looked at me—you don’t expect me to believe it didn’t really happen?”
She was outraged. “I didn’t know you were going to lure me down some cobbled narrow alleyways in my high heels.”