by Henry James
Densher, from whom an impatience had escaped, had already caught himself up. “Pardon my brutality. Of course I know what you’re talking about. I saw him, toward the evening,” he further explained, “in the Piazza; only just saw him—through the glass at Florian’s—without any words. In fact I scarcely know him—there wouldn’t have been occasion. It was but once, moreover—he must have gone that night. But I knew he wouldn’t have come for nothing, and I turned it over—what he would have come for.”
Oh so had Mrs. Stringham. “He came for exasperation.”
Densher approved. “He came to let her know that he knows better than she for whom it was she had a couple of months before, in her fool’s paradise, refused him.”
“How you DO know!”—and Mrs. Stringham almost smiled.
“I know that—but I don’t know the good it does him.”
“The good, he thinks, if he has patience—not too much—may be to come. He doesn’t know what he has done to her. Only WE, you see, do that.”
He saw, but he wondered. “She kept from him—what she felt?”
“She was able—I’m sure of it—not to show anything. He dealt her his blow, and she took it without a sign.” Mrs. Stringham, it was plain, spoke by book, and it brought into play again her appreciation of what she related. “She’s magnificent.”
Densher again gravely assented. “Magnificent!”
“And HE,” she went on, “is an idiot of idiots.”
“An idiot of idiots.” For a moment, on it all, on the stupid doom in it, they looked at each other. “Yet he’s thought so awfully clever.”
“So awfully—it’s Maud Lowder’s own view. And he was nice, in London,” said Mrs. Stringham, “to ME. One could almost pity him—he has had such a good conscience.”
“That’s exactly the inevitable ass.”
“Yes, but it wasn’t—I could see from the only few things she first told me—that he meant HER the least harm. He intended none whatever.”
“That’s always the ass at his worst,” Densher returned. “He only of course meant harm to me.”
“And good to himself—he thought that would come. He had been unable to swallow,” Mrs. Stringham pursued, “what had happened on his other visit. He had been then too sharply humiliated.”
“Oh I saw that.”
“Yes, and he also saw you. He saw you received, as it were, while he was turned away.”
“Perfectly,” Densher said—”I’ve filled it out. And also that he has known meanwhile for WHAT I was then received. For a stay of all these weeks. He had had it to think of.”
“Precisely—it was more than he could bear. But he has it,” said Mrs. Stringham, “to think of still.”
“Only, after all,” asked Densher, who himself somehow, at this point, was having more to think of even than he had yet had—”only, after all, how has he happened to know? That is, to know enough.”
“What do you call enough?” Mrs. Stringham enquired.
“He can only have acted—it would have been his sole safety—from full knowledge.”
He had gone on without heeding her question; but, face to face as they were, something had none the less passed between them. It was this that, after an instant, made her again interrogative. “What do you mean by full knowledge?”
Densher met it indirectly. “Where has he been since October?”
“I think he has been back to England. He came in fact, I’ve reason to believe, straight from there.”
“Straight to do this job? All the way for his half-hour?”
“Well, to try again—with the help perhaps of a new fact. To make himself possibly right with her—a different attempt from the other. He had at any rate something to tell her, and he didn’t know his opportunity would reduce itself to half an hour. Or perhaps indeed half an hour would be just what was most effective. It HAS been!” said Susan Shepherd.
Her companion took it in, understanding but too well; yet as she lighted the matter for him more, really, than his own courage had quite dared—putting the absent dots on several i’s—he saw new questions swarm. They had been till now in a bunch, entangled and confused; and they fell apart, each showing for itself. The first he put to her was at any rate abrupt. “Have you heard of late from Mrs. Lowder.”
“Oh yes, two or three times. She depends naturally upon news of Milly.”
He hesitated. “And does she depend, naturally, upon news of ME?”
His friend matched for an instant his deliberation.
“I’ve given her none that hasn’t been decently good. This will have been the first.”
” ‘This’?” Densher was thinking.
“Lord Mark’s having been here, and her being as she is.”
He thought a moment longer. “What has Mrs. Lowder written about him? Has she written that he has been with them?”
“She has mentioned him but once—it was in her letter before the last. Then she said something.”
“And what did she say?”
Mrs. Stringham produced it with an effort. “Well it was in reference to Miss Croy. That she thought Kate was thinking of him. Or perhaps I should say rather that he was thinking of HER—only it seemed this time to have struck Maud that he was seeing the way more open to him.”
Densher listened with his eyes on the ground, but he presently raised them to speak, and there was that in his face which proved him aware of a queerness in his question. “Does she mean he has been encouraged to PROPOSE to her niece?”
“I don’t know what she means.”
“Of course not”—he recovered himself; “and I oughtn’t to seem to trouble you to piece together what I can’t piece myself. Only I ‘guess,’ ” he added, “I CAN piece it.”
She spoke a little timidly, but she risked it. “I dare say I can piece it too.”
It was one of the things in her—and his conscious face took it from her as such—that from the moment of her coming in had seemed to mark for him, as to what concerned him, the long jump of her perception. They had parted four days earlier with many things, between them, deep down. But these things were now on their troubled surface, and it wasn’t he who had brought them so quickly up. Women were wonderful—at least this one was. But so, not less, was Milly, was Aunt Maud; so, most of all, was his very Kate. Well, he already knew what he had been feeling about the circle of petticoats. They were all SUCH petticoats! It was just the fineness of his tangle. The sense of that, in its turn, for us too, might have been not unconnected with his putting to his visitor a question that quite passed over her remark. “Has Miss Croy meanwhile written to our friend?”
“Oh,” Mrs. Stringham amended, “HER friend also. But not a single word that I know of.”
He had taken it for certain she hadn’t—the thing being after all but a shade more strange than his having himself, with Milly, never for six weeks mentioned the young lady in question. It was for that matter but a shade more strange than Milly’s not having mentioned her. In spite of which, and however inconsequently, he blushed anew for Kate’s silence. He got away from it in fact as quickly as possible, and the furthest he could get was by reverting for a minute to the man they had been judging. “How did he manage to get AT her? She had only—with what had passed between them before—to say she couldn’t see him.”
“Oh she was disposed to kindness. She was easier,” the good lady explained with a slight embarrassment, “than at the other time.”
“Easier?”
“She was off her guard. There was a difference.”
“Yes. But exactly not THE difference.”
“Exactly not the difference of her having to be harsh. Perfectly. She could afford to be the opposite.” With which, as he said nothing, she just impatiently completed her sense. “She had had YOU here for six weeks.”
“Oh!” Densher softly groaned.
“Besides, I think he must have written her first—written I mean in a tone to smooth his way. That it would be a kindness to himse
lf. Then on the spot—”
“On the spot,” Densher broke in, “he unmasked? The horrid little beast!”
It made Susan Shepherd turn slightly pale, though quickening, as for hope, the intensity of her look at him. “Oh he went off without an alarm.”
“And he must have gone off also without a hope.”
“Ah that, certainly.”
“Then it WAS mere base revenge. Hasn’t he known her, into the bargain,” the young man asked—”didn’t he, weeks before, see her, judge her, feel her, as having for such a suit as his not more perhaps than a few months to live?”
Mrs. Stringham at first, for reply, but looked at him in silence; and it gave more force to what she then remarkably added. “He has doubtless been aware of what you speak of, just as you have yourself been aware.”
“He has wanted her, you mean, just BECAUSE—?”
“Just because,” said Susan Shepherd.
“The hound!” Merton Densher brought out. He moved off, however, with a hot face, as soon as he had spoken, conscious again of an intention in his visitor’s reserve. Dusk was now deeper, and after he had once more taken counsel of the dreariness without he turned to his companion. “Shall we have lights—a lamp or the candles?”
“Not for me.”
“Nothing?”
“Not for me.”
He waited at the window another moment and then faced his friend with a thought. “He WILL have proposed to Miss Croy. That’s what has happened.”
Her reserve continued. “It’s you who must judge.”
“Well, I do judge. Mrs. Lowder will have done so too—only SHE, poor lady, wrong. Miss Croy’s refusal of him will have struck him”—Densher continued to make it out—”as a phenomenon requiring a reason.”
“And you’ve been clear to him AS the reason?”
“Not too clear—since I’m sticking here and since that has been a fact to make his descent on Miss Theale relevant. But clear enough. He has believed,” said Densher bravely, “that I may have been a reason at Lancaster Gate, and yet at the same time have been up to something in Venice.”
Mrs. Stringham took her courage from his own. ” ‘Up to’ something? Up to what?”
“God knows. To some ‘game,’ as they say. To some deviltry. To some duplicity.”
“Which of course,” Mrs. Stringham observed, “is a monstrous supposition.” Her companion, after a stiff minute—sensibly long for each—fell away from her again, and then added to it another minute, which he spent once more looking out with his hands in his pockets. This was no answer, he perfectly knew, to what she had dropped, and it even seemed to state for his own ears that no answer was possible. She left him to himself, and he was glad she had declined, for their further colloquy, the advantage of lights. These would have been an advantage mainly to herself. Yet she got her benefit too even from the absence of them. It came out in her very tone when at last she addressed him—so differently, for confidence—in words she had already used. “If Sir Luke himself asks it of you as something you can do for HIM, will you deny to Milly herself what she has been made so dreadfully to believe?”
Oh how he knew he hung back! But at last he said: “You’re absolutely certain then that she does believe it?”
“Certain?” She appealed to their whole situation. “Judge!”
He took his time again to judge. “Do YOU believe it?”
He was conscious that his own appeal pressed her hard; it eased him a little that her answer must be a pain to her discretion. She answered none the less, and he was truly the harder pressed. “What I believe will inevitably depend more or less on your action. You can perfectly settle it—if you care. I promise to believe you down to the ground if, to save her life, you consent to a denial.”
“But a denial, when it comes to that—confound the whole thing, don’t you see!—of exactly what?”
It was as if he were hoping she would narrow; but in fact she enlarged. “Of everything.”
Everything had never even yet seemed to him so incalculably much. “Oh!” he simply moaned into the gloom.
Book Ninth, Chapter 4
The near Thursday, coming nearer and bringing Sir Luke Strett, brought also blessedly an abatement of other rigours. The weather changed, the stubborn storm yielded, and the autumn sunshine, baffled for many days, but now hot and almost vindictive, came into its own again and, with an almost audible paean, a suffusion of bright sound that was one with the bright colour, took large possession. Venice glowed and plashed and called and chimed again; the air was like a clap of hands, and the scattered pinks, yellows, blues, sea-greens, were like a hanging-out of vivid stuffs, a laying-down of fine carpets. Densher rejoiced in this on the occasion of his going to the station to meet the great doctor. He went after consideration, which, as he was constantly aware, was at present his imposed, his only, way of doing anything. That was where the event had landed him—where no event in his life had landed him before. He had thought, no doubt, from the day he was born, much more than he had acted; except indeed that he remembered thoughts—a few of them—which at the moment of their coming to him had thrilled him almost like adventures. But anything like his actual state he had not, as to the prohibition of impulse, accident, range—the prohibition in other words of freedom—hitherto known. The great oddity was that if he had felt his arrival, so few weeks back, especially as an adventure, nothing could now less resemble one than the fact of his staying. It would be an adventure to break away, to depart, to go back, above all, to London, and tell Kate Croy he had done so; but there was something of the merely, the almost meanly, obliged and involved sort in his going on as he was. That was the effect in particular of Mrs. Stringham’s visit, which had left him as with such a taste in his mouth of what he couldn’t do. It had made this quantity clear to him, and yet had deprived him of the sense, the other sense, of what, for a refuge, he possibly COULD.
It was but a small make-believe of freedom, he knew, to go to the station for Sir Luke. Nothing equally free, at all events, had he yet turned over so long. What then was his odious position but that again and again he was afraid? He stiffened himself under this consciousness as if it had been a tax levied by a tyrant. He hadn’t at any time proposed to himself to live long enough for fear to preponderate in his life. Such was simply the advantage it had actually got of him. He was afraid for instance that an advance to his distinguished friend might prove for him somehow a pledge or a committal. He was afraid of it as a current that would draw him too far; yet he thought with an equal aversion of being shabby, being poor, through fear. What finally prevailed with him was the reflexion that, whatever might happen, the great man had, after that occasion at the palace, their young woman’s brief sacrifice to society—and the hour of Mrs. Stringham’s appeal had brought it well to the surface—shown him marked benevolence. Mrs. Stringham’s comments on the relation in which Milly had placed them made him—it was unmistakeable—feel things he perhaps hadn’t felt. It was in the spirit of seeking a chance to feel again adequately whatever it was he had missed—it was, no doubt, in that spirit, so far as it went a stroke for freedom, that Densher, arriving betimes, paced the platform before the train came in. Only, after it had come and he had presented himself at the door of Sir Luke’s compartment with everything that followed—only, as the situation developed, the sense of an anti-climax to so many intensities deprived his apprehensions and hesitations even of the scant dignity they might claim. He could scarce have said if the visitor’s manner less showed the remembrance that might have suggested expectation, or made shorter work of surprise in presence of the fact.
Sir Luke had clean forgotten—so Densher read—the rather remarkable young man he had formerly gone about with, though he picked him up again, on the spot, with one large quiet look. The young man felt himself so picked, and the thing immediately affected him as the proof of a splendid economy. Opposed to all the waste with which he was now connected the exhibition was of a nature quite nobly to ad
monish him. The eminent pilgrim, in the train, all the way, had used the hours as he needed, thinking not a moment in advance of what finally awaited him. An exquisite case awaited him—of which, in this queer way, the remarkable young man was an outlying part; but the single motion of his face, the motion into which Densher, from the platform, lightly stirred its stillness, was his first renewed cognition. If, however, he had suppressed the matter by leaving Victoria he would at once suppress now, in turn, whatever else suited. The perception of this became as a symbol of the whole pitch, so far as one might one’s self be concerned, of his visit. One saw, our friend further meditated, everything that, in contact, he appeared to accept—if only, for much, not to trouble to sink it: what one missed was the inward use he made of it. Densher began wondering, at the great water-steps outside, what use he would make of the anomaly of their having there to separate. Eugenio had been on the platform, in the respectful rear, and the gondola from the palace, under his direction, bestirred itself, with its attaching mixture of alacrity and dignity, on their coming out of the station together. Densher didn’t at all mind now that, he himself of necessity refusing a seat on the deep black cushions beside the guest of the palace, he had Milly’s three emissaries for spectators; and this susceptibility, he also knew, it was something to have left behind. All he did was to smile down vaguely from the steps—they could see him, the donkeys, as shut out as they would. “I don’t,” he said with a sad headshake, “go there now.”