by Emma Easter
He nodded slowly but said nothing to her.
“Will you help me send it?”
“I can’t,” he said, gazing into her eyes. His eyes traveled down to her lips and then to her chest.
She placed her hand on his arm so he would look at her face again and asked, “What is your name?”
“James,” he said.
“James, please. It’s just a letter to my brother. I miss him and I want to know that he’s doing well.”
The guard smiled, looking at her hand on his arm, and she quickly removed it. His smile widened and turned lewd. “And what will you give me if I send the letter to your brother?”
Her heart began to pound. She knew exactly what he was asking for but, she forced herself to smile and asked, “What do you want?” She prayed he would be too ashamed to actually say it.
He looked around and then put his hand on her waist.
She wanted to slap him, but she moved away slightly so his hand fell off. Still smiling, she thrust the letter into his hand and said, “It’s late. We will talk tomorrow.” She backed away quickly and hurried into the house.
She leaned against the door, shut her eyes, and took a deep breath. Relief ran through her veins and then her eyes flew open when she heard footsteps approaching. She flew up the stairs and into her room. Closing the door quietly, she sighed and whispered, “Thank you, Lord.”
She had done what she could. Hopefully, Taylor would agree to ask the elders to give her a fair hearing. “Lord, please let Taylor agree to speak to the elders on my behalf. And please give me favor with them,” she whispered.
She shed her gown, put on her pajamas, and fell into bed. For the first time since she’d come, she fell asleep quickly.
Chapter 22
The next morning, from up in her room, Rachel watched the guard, James, through the window. He was talking to another guard, and she waited impatiently for him to finish so she could catch his eye. Surely, Taylor had given him a message for her.
When he finally looked up at her, she discreetly mouthed, “Do you have a message for me?”
He shook his head and turned away.
Her heart sank. Taylor had not given him a message for her, which meant he had decided not to help her. She sighed sadly. Still, she would have to find a way to talk to the guard soon and find out what Taylor’s reaction had been when he got her message.
In between classes, as they usually did, she and Lily talked in whispers. She told Lily about what had happened when she’d given the note to James. Lily cut in when she told her about how he had put his hand on her waist and smiled lewdly at her.
“Are you sure it’s safe to approach this guard again?” Lily asked. “What if he does something worse next time you talk to him?”
Rachel said, “Which brings me to the next part of my story. This morning, I asked the guard if Taylor had given him any message for me and he…”
Lily cut in again. “Wait, Rachel. How did you ask him? Did you walk up to him in the open?”
“Of course not.” Rachel shook her head. “I was in my room. I caught his eye and mouthed the words. Taylor didn’t give him any message for me, but I plan to find out what Taylor’s reaction was when James gave him my letter.”
“No, Rachel.” Lily shook her head slowly. “You’re not going to meet this guard anymore. You know he wants something from you that you cannot give him. Asking him for a favor again might make him think you owe him. What will happen if he forces himself on you? You won’t be able to complain to anyone for obvious reasons.”
“But I have to go and find out, Lily.”
“Then I will go with you,” Lily said.
Rachel said nothing. Apart from the possibility of being assaulted by the guard, there were risks involved with loitering around alone at night. Those risks were multiplied when there was more than one person. Still, Lily was right. The risks involved with going to meet the guard alone at night were way worse.
“So, it is settled, Rachel. I will go with you.”
Rachel sighed and nodded.
While the tutor was writing on the blackboard, Margaret appeared at the door of the classroom. She turned her scowl on Rachel and told her a car was outside the house waiting to take her somewhere. The tutor turned around and shot Margaret an angry look, but Margaret ignored her. Rachel turned around, gave Lily a small smile, and then followed Margaret out of the class.
Margaret said nothing as they walked down the stairs, clearly sullen. Rachel was grateful to God for the woman’s silence. Outside the house, Rachel climbed into a red jeep. She was alone in the car except for the driver. She asked the man where exactly they were going, but he said nothing to her. As he drove, she looked out the window, curious about where he was taking her, and then as they approached the community hall, her heart began to pound.
The driver parked in front of the hall and she got out of the car. She looked up at the hall and it immediately dawned on her why she was here. Taylor had succeeded in reaching out to the elders and convincing them to give her a fair hearing, and he had done so very quickly. She took a deep breath as anxiety pressed in on her and then murmured, “Go in, Rachel. This is your chance.”
She made her way up the stairs to the entrance of the hall, her hands damp and her stomach queasy.
Before she opened the large mahogany door into the community hall, she prayed briefly, asking the Lord for favor and for wisdom to know what to say when she stood before the elders. Lily had told her that this sort of thing had only happened once in recent memory, and then it had been unsuccessful. She prayed that her case would be different. If she was successful, the best scenario would be that they would grant her what she wanted, which was to be able to leave Fallow Creek with her daughter. She would not stop Mike from visiting Emily any time he wanted since he was her father, but she was going to plead that Emily was better off with her mother at this time, since she was still a baby. She could not comprehend going back to live with Mike, but if today did not go in her favor, she would have to. She finally pushed the large doors open and entered the hall.
Taylor had been commissioned to rebuild this hall some years ago, as he had done to many other large buildings in town. The community hall had been a much smaller building until then. By the time Taylor was given the contract to reconstruct the building, it had become dilapidated because it was the oldest building in the town. She looked at the shiny marble floors and the large stone pillars, the high ceilings and wide windows. Taylor had outdone himself here. She made her way to the front of the hall where a row of five elders sat. She swallowed when she saw Dennis Hamilton, the spiritual leader of Fallow Creek, sitting with them. She had never spoken or had to deal with him before. Apart from the elders, no one else was in the hall.
None of the elders said anything for a long while as she stood before them, trying to steel her rapidly beating heart. Finally, Dennis Hamilton, who sat in the middle of the group, said, “Let us start.” He uttered a brief prayer and then declared that it was time to start the hearing.
Rachel stood before them as they talked about her request for the hearing, which was very rare. One of the elders told her that they had decided to hear her out because it felt like the right thing to do. They told her that Taylor, her brother, had briefed them on what exactly she wanted, and then told her to repeat and elaborate on her request.
She exhaled and gathered herself together, and then she began to tell them about her life with Mike. She knew they would see little wrong with what Mike had done to her. These men mostly ran their homes and had the same kind of characters as Mike. As for what he’d done to Keith, there was no point telling them about it because they would do nothing. She had vowed that if she ever got out of Fallow Creek, Mike would pay for his actions.
As she spoke, she began to feel increasingly hopeless. The men had nonchalant looks on their faces. Why had she believed she would ever stand a chance of convincing them to let her follow her own path? They were looking at he
r with derision. The only reason they were seated here allowing her to speak, she was sure, was because of their constant self-righteous need to feel as though they were just men; and, of course, because of Taylor’s influence.
Despite her misgivings, she continued to speak. When she brought up the Bible story about the daughters of Zelophehad who had been granted their father’s estate after they pleaded their case before Moses, most of the men scowled deeply. The part of the Bible that supported women taking control of their own destiny was clearly not popular with them.
She finally asked that she be allowed to leave the community in peace to make her own way and be allowed to take her daughter with her.
The elders began to murmur and then one of them said, “You want to take a child away from her father?”
“No, I want my baby to have a chance to grow up with her mother, which will not happen if I continue to stay in that Restoration House. And no matter where I go, her father is allowed to visit her.” She sighed exasperatedly. “I don’t know how long I am expected to stay in that house. My baby needs me. I still breastfeed…”
Rayford Young cut in. “You brought this on yourself. The length of your stay will be decided on by us.”
Rachel did not reply. There was no need. She could see the way the case was going to go from the expressions on their faces and their words. Still, she prayed and held onto hope that, somehow, the Lord would intervene on her behalf.
Another elder, Blake Stone, called out Mike’s name and Rachel sucked in her breath. She wasn’t ready to see him, though she had known he would be here today.
Mike walked in and was asked to state his own case. He began to speak, but she tuned him out. She could already guess what he was going to say. His words would be full of accusations levied against her. She’d cheated on him as his wife. She did not submit to him as she should have done.
Her stomach churned with anger. He believed she was his wife, while she knew it was not so. They were neither married in the sight of the law or of God. The look on the men’s faces told her everything she needed to know about how this case would turn out if the Lord did not intervene.
After Mike finished levying his accusations against her, they called Taylor out.
Taylor appeared from the back door and stood beside her. He turned to give her an encouraging smile and then turned to the elders again.
“You were the one who brought this case to us, Mr. Dalton,” Dennis Hamilton said, “but I don’t know what you were thinking. Your sister’s request goes against everything we believe to be God’s will.”
Taylor said, “I brought her request to you all because even though this has not happened before, I think it’s right for everyone to be heard, no matter who they are. Everyone has a right to defend themselves and to state their case.”
Blake Stone nodded and said, “That is why we agreed to meet and hear her out.”
“Then at least consider her request. Surely you cannot blame her for wanting to speak out against a man who she has accused of being cruel and whom she now despises.”
Mike spoke up, “Ask her why she despises me. She has been committing adultery and now wants to take my child away.”
Rachel cringed at the accusation and said, “What he accuses me of is not true. I have never slept with another man… and even if I did —” Her anger flared as she remembered what Mike had done to Keith, but she pressed it down. “Even if I did sleep with another man, it would not be adultery, because I am not married to Mike!”
Cries of protests broke out among the elders and Mike raged at her. Her words had clearly infuriated them, but she had to state the truth. Without a doubt, to them, this was really what this case was about. Judging a woman whose actions threatened to destabilize the way of life here.
Taylor turned to look at her and shook his head. He whispered, “You should not have said that.”
She did not reply.
The commotion died down and Dennis Hamilton said in a loud voice, “Wait outside, Rachel… and you too, Taylor. We will discuss the case amongst ourselves and then make a decision.”
She walked out of the hall with Taylor and then groaned once they were outside.
“You should not have said what you did, Rachel,” Taylor said, gazing puzzlingly at her.
“I said the truth,” Rachel answered.
Taylor continued to stare at her. He looked baffled. After a long moment, he said, “Who has been filling your head with false ideas?”
“God,” she said boldly. “And they are certainly not false.”
He looked taken aback. For a full minute, he said nothing as he scrutinized her face. Finally, he said, “God told you that you are not married to Mike? That you should commit adultery?”
“I did not commit adultery!” she said angrily. “And yes, God did tell me that I’m not married to Mike. And you know I am not, if you’re going to be truthful with yourself, Taylor. You need to give up the lies that this place has filled you and everyone’s head with. You were not like this before we came here. We believed...”
“Stop it!” Taylor said. “This is all wrong, Rachel. You are wrong.”
“I am right and you know it,” she said to him.
“No… no, you are not!”
She opened her mouth to insist that she was right, but the doors opened. Mike stood at the door, glaring at her and Taylor. “They want you both now,” he said coldly, and then walked back into the hall.
Rachel entered the hall with Taylor, and they both stood in front of the elders.
“We have great respect for you, Taylor Dalton,” Dennis Hamilton said. “That is why we agreed to hear your sister out. However, we will not tolerate any ideas or doctrines that threaten our way of life here.”
Rachel’s emotions roiled. This is it, Lord. They were about to give their decision. Her future relied on what they said.
“This is our decision,” the spiritual leader continued. “We will show that we can be merciful in spite of the flagrant disregard for our laws and way of life here. Rachel, we have decided that in order for you to be able to leave the Restoration House and see your daughter, you will have to agree to remain with your husband and submit yourself completely to him as a wife should.” He stared intently at her; his eyes hard. “However, if that is not to your liking, then you can leave Fallow Creek forever… but without your daughter. You will have twenty-four hours to pray and make your decision.”
She widened her eyes in horror. She had to go back and live with Mike as his wife if she wanted to see Emily again? And if she didn’t want to go back to him, which she didn’t, she would have to leave Fallow Creek and never see Emily again? She could choose to leave Fallow Creek and fight for Emily on the outside, but Mike had all the resources to make sure she didn’t win. And now that the whole community was involved, their combined resources would guarantee that.
She could not speak, but Taylor protested on her behalf. “The ruling is way too harsh,” he said as the elders started to rise from their seats, clearly done with the hearing. “Please don’t banish her from Fallow Creek. At least let her be able to stay with me while Mike tries to win her heart back so she can see her daughter regularly.”
The elders did not answer. They began to leave the hall and Rachel screamed. “No, I cannot go back to Mike.”
“Then you can forget about Emily,” Mike said with a sneer.
She ignored him and faced the elders, who were already at the door. “I cannot leave my daughter here,” she said in desperation.
No one answered her. The elders all left the hall and Mike came and stood before her. “I am ready to take you back, Rachel, in spite of your betrayal. Remember that Emily needs you now when you make your decision.”
She glared at him and suddenly could not control herself anymore. She slapped him hard and then raised her hand to slap him again.
Taylor held her back and Mike narrowed his eyes. “It’s your decision, Rachel,” he said in a voice as hard as stone.
He walked away, and she watched him walk out of the hall, her heart heavy.
“I’m sorry, Rachel,” Taylor said, looking at her sympathetically.
She stared at the wall behind him, her heart aching. When she had considered the worst outcome of this case, she had thought it would be the elders insisting that she remained in the Restoration House. At least there she would not be far from Emily and she could go on trying to figure out a way to be with her daughter that did not include being with Mike. Now she was being forced to either leave Fallow Creek altogether without Emily or go back to Mike. She fell into her brother’s arms and began to cry. The impossibility of her situation and the burden of the decision she had to make weighed heavily on her.
“I cannot go back to Mike!” she cried. But she already knew it was probably the decision she had to make. Emily was still a nursing baby who needed her mother. And Rachel could not even bear the thought of being permanently separated from her. And yet, how could she go back to Mike knowing it would be a sin before God? And she loathed him.
Taylor held her tightly. After a while, he said, “You have no choice, Rachel. Obviously as a mother you know you cannot leave your daughter at this time, no matter what Mike may have done to you.”
Her brother was right, and yet he did not understand the dire situation she was in. To him, it was just a case of going back to a difficult marriage. But to her, it was something much worse.
She pulled away from him. “Mike killed the man I loved,” she said.
“The man you loved?”
“Taylor, forget about that. I just told you Mike killed someone.”
“Are you sure?”
She told him everything.
He looked up thoughtfully and said, “From what you said, I think it was an accident.”
Speechless, Rachel looked at him for a long time and then shook her head sadly. There was no use trying to say more.
He gave her a sad smile. “I will try to talk to Mike and make sure he treats you well when you return to him,”