‘But not yet,’ she begged him. ‘Do not leave me just yet!’
With something between a sigh and a groan he stopped and pulled her round to face him.
‘Ah, Cassie, do you think this is easy for me? I should have left you at Dieppe, but I was too weak. I told myself you needed me to see you safe to England, and when we reached Newhaven still I could not leave you. But now you are safe, there is no reason for me to stay longer.’
‘But there is!’ She clutched at his jacket. ‘Grandmama will use her influence to help you find a position here in England, I know she will. At least stay here until we have secured you a place in a hospital. Please, Raoul.’
She was begging him, but she did not care. Perhaps if she kissed him he would give in. She reached up to cup his face, but he caught her hands, shaking his head at her.
‘Do not do this, Cassie, in the end it will make no difference, I must go.’
‘At least stay until the end of the week,’ she said desperately. ‘That will give Grandmama time to write letters of introduction for you. It is the least you deserve after all you have done for me.’ She placed her hands on her stomach. ‘And if I am with child, I would rather its father was not locked up like a common felon.’
She was being cruel and the shadow of pain in his eyes tore at her heart, but it was her last argument.
He exhaled, a long, sighing breath. ‘Very well. I will remain here until the end of the week, but not a moment longer.’
‘Thank you.’
She closed her eyes. Four more days. It was not long, but it was something. All she could do now was pray for some miracle.
* * *
Cassandra made her way back indoors alone. She could not help thinking that there was something she had missed, that somehow there was a way for them to be happy together. She did not see Raoul again until late in the afternoon, when her grandmother asked her to accompany her for a stroll on the west lawn. She was aware of a stab of jealousy as she watched Raoul joining in a lively game of cricket with Ellen and her two young charges.
‘Miss Tatham is certainly at ease with little Meggie and Florence,’ she observed, trying hard to sound unconcerned.
‘I am much indebted to her,’ replied Lady Hune. ‘I was at first against the idea of our looking after the little girls while my nephew and his new bride went away, but it has indeed been more restful than escorting Ellen to an endless round of parties in town. And now she is initiating Monsieur Doulevant into the mysteries of cricket.’
Cassandra saw her chance.
‘What do you think of him, Grandmama?’
‘Is it right to judge a man on such short acquaintance, Cassandra? I am naturally disposed to like him because he has brought you home to me and I think at heart he is a good man.’
‘He is, Grandmama,’ said Cassie. ‘He is the bravest man I have ever met and also very kind, and honourable—’
‘My love, he may be all those things, but he is still not the husband for you.’ Lady Hune took her hand. ‘We may be able to keep him out of prison, but he still has nothing to live on.’
‘I know it,’ said Cassandra unhappily. ‘He has told me he will only remain at Chantreys until the end of the week.’
‘I respect him all the more for curtailing his visit here. Forgive me if I speak frankly, Cassandra, but I believe he knows in his heart that you would make a disastrous wife for him. He needs someone of his own rank, someone who understands his world and can support him in his work.’
Cassie nodded and glanced down at her hands, encased in chicken-skin gloves to protect them while the blisters and cuts of the past few weeks healed.
‘What a useless creature I am, Grandmama.’
‘Nonsense. You have all the accomplishments of a lady and in time I do not despair of you finding another husband, this time one who will make you happy.’
Cassie did not attempt to argue, but at that moment she doubted she would ever be happy again. She must not think of that.
‘But you will help Monsieur Doulevant, Grandmama, will you not?’
‘Certainly, my dear, if I can. Now, this wind is too chill to remain out of doors for long, even with the sunshine. We shall go in. That is, unless you wish to remain here and join in their game?’
Cassie glanced at the laughing group running happily about the lawn and resolutely looked away again.
‘No, Grandmama, I shall come indoors with you.’
* * *
Raoul watched Cassandra walk off with the marchioness and the unhappy droop of her shoulders tore at his heart. Having delivered her safely into Lady Hune’s care he should have left Chantreys immediately. Now he had promised Cassie he would remain, when every day was torture for them both. He decided he must break that promise, since remaining here was merely prolonging the agony. He fixed his smile in place and tried to concentrate upon this foolish English game. He still had a little money left from the purse Cassie had shared with him, he would use that to hire a chaise and leave at first light in the morning. Where he did not know and did not care.
* * *
As soon as he had changed for dinner Raoul went off in search of Fingle. He ran lightly down the stairs to the hall, turning the last corner just as the butler appeared.
‘Ah, Monsieur Doulevant. Her ladyship would like you to join her in the drawing room.’
‘But certainly,’ replied Raoul, descending the last few steps. As he accompanied Fingle across the marble floor he quickly explained his requirements for a carriage the following morning.
‘I wish to be leaving at dawn,’ he reiterated as they reached the drawing room door. ‘Is that understood?’
Fingle bowed. ‘Perfectly, monsieur. Allow me to announce you to her ladyship.’
Lady Hune was sitting in her customary chair, but Raoul’s eyes were drawn immediately to Cassie, who was standing by the window and outlined by the late afternoon sun that was pouring in through the glass. She was wearing the pale-blue gown again, the muslin so fine that the sun shone through it and he could see the slender body beneath. Quickly he averted his gaze and turned away from her to greet his hostess.
‘Ah, Monsieur Doulevant.’ Lady Hune held out her hand to him and he bowed briefly over her fingers. She continued without preamble. ‘I am under an obligation to you and I need to repay it. I have been making enquiries and I understand a medical degree may be obtained quite easily from some universities, especially those of Aberdeen or St Andrews. I am willing to purchase such a degree for you and to give you my support to set up a practice in Bath—’
He stepped back, frowning.
‘I have heard what it is to be a doctor in Bath, madam. To quote your granddaughter, they have grown fat giving out pills and placebos to the rich and privileged. No, I thank you!’ He pressed his lips together to prevent any further outburst and took a few slow, steadying breaths so that he could say politely, ‘I am obliged to you, my lady, but I will make my own arrangements.’
‘Oh? And just how will you to that, monsieur? Do you have papers, proof that you are not a Frenchman?’
‘Grandmama!’
He heard Cassie’s anguished whisper and curbed his temper.
‘You know I do not, Lady Hune. I served with distinction in the French Navy for six years—’
‘That is hardly going to recommend you to the English government! You are most likely to be taken up and imprisoned the moment you leave Chantreys.’
‘So be it. I will ask them to contact my captain. He would vouch that I was conscripted into the navy and that I was honourably discharged.’
‘My grandmother will help, will you not, ma’am?’ He looked down to see Cassie standing beside him. ‘She managed to get word to my cousin so I am sure she could find Captain Belfort. She will not let the war prevent her from doing so, will
you, dearest Grandmama?’
‘We can try,’ admitted Lady Hune. ‘But that may take months if the man is at sea.’ She stared pointedly at Cassandra, who refused to move from Raoul’s side. ‘In the meantime,’ she continued, ‘what is to become of Monsieur Doulevant?’
Raoul said quickly, ‘I will not live as your pensioner, ma’am!’
‘No, I did not think that would be acceptable to you.’
With Cassie beside him he was emboldened to give voice to a plan that had been forming.
‘I know that there is now a Royal College of Surgeons in London, Lady Hune. If I could gain membership there—members have to pass an examination, I believe, but I have no fear of failing. I studied at the Hôtel Dieu before I entered the navy, and went back there upon my return to Paris. In time I could prove myself, I could even make a reasonable living.’
‘Then you could come to Bath and call at Royal Crescent to keep us informed of your progress,’ put in Cassie.
Lady Hune put up her hand.
‘You do not understand, Cassandra. A doctor might be considered acceptable as a visitor, but a surgeon’s presence would never be countenanced in our circles.’
‘No, Grandmama, forgive me, but you do not understand,’ cried Cassie. ‘Raoul is very skilled at his profession, I have seen him at work, he has saved many lives—’
Lady Hune’s ebony cane banged on the floor.
‘That is not the point, Cassandra. One might invite a doctor to dine with us, to visit. But a surgeon—it is an admirable trade, I am sure, but it is a trade nevertheless. Let me speak plainly, my child, as a surgeon’s wife you would never be acknowledged in society. You would do as well to marry a shopkeeper!’
Raoul looked into the haughty face of his hostess.
‘If we are speaking plainly, ma’am, permit me to ask: are you saying that if I were to become a doctor you would allow me to marry Lady Cassandra?’
The marchioness compressed her lips and after a long silence she pronounced judgement.
‘Once your practice was established and if the attachment between you proves lasting, then, yes. You have charm, monsieur, I can see that. It will not take you long to make a success in Bath and with success comes money. And in the meantime I would sponsor you and introduce you to my acquaintance.’
Raoul said nothing. It was a compromise, but would it be so very bad? He would be at the beck and call of just the sort of persons he most despised, but he would be able to practise a little medicine. At least he would have Cassandra and he would not feel the same obligation towards his pampered patients so there was little chance of his neglecting her. She would be his whole world.
She would have to be.
‘Lady Hune, there is something you should know.’ He glanced towards Cassie. ‘When I left the French Navy and joined my sister in Paris, she had just received word from our father’s lawyer in Brussels. It concerned an English countess.’
‘The one who ruined your lives?’ put in Cassie.
He nodded. ‘The very same. It appears that when she died she remembered me in her will. She has left me a house in England. Perhaps at the end her conscience pricked her.’
‘Perhaps she had fond memories of your father,’ said Cassie. ‘It may have been that she was lonely in Brussels.’
‘Perhaps. I was so young then. The situation may not have been quite as I perceived it.’
‘But what of this property?’ demanded Lady Hune. ‘Where is it, what is it?’
‘That I do not know, the lawyers mentioned a small bequest, probably not enough to provide an income. At that time I wanted nothing to do with the lady or her money and I never made enquiry. Now, however...’ He turned to the marchioness. ‘I know I have no papers, ma’am, but with your help perhaps, I might go to London and approach the lawyers.’
‘That is possible,’ replied Lady Hune. ‘Certainly a doctor with property would be a more acceptable suitor for my granddaughter.’
He bowed. ‘That is what I thought, ma’am.’
* * *
Cassie caught her breath. Could Raoul truly love her so much that he would consider giving up his work, his vocation, to marry her? That was a sacrifice indeed. She closed her eyes. Gerald had wanted everything from her, no compromise, no sacrifice on his part at all. She had happily given up everything, her family, friends and her fortune, to be with him. It had been an unequal partnership and inevitably it had ended in disaster.
Suddenly she knew what must be done. She forced her unwilling limbs to move across the room until she was standing beside her grandmother.
‘No, Raoul,’ she said quietly. ‘I will not let you sacrifice yourself in this way. It would destroy you to give up the work you love.’ She met his eyes steadily, drawing on all her Arrandale blood and breeding to get her through the next few minutes. ‘You told me yourself you had no choice, that being a surgeon is what you are. You must be allowed to practise. I have seen the good work you can do. I cannot allow you to give that up for me. You said yourself there could be no happiness for us. You would resent me and I could not blame you.’ She took a deep breath. ‘Before you came into the room, my grandmother was telling me that she has an acquaintance who is patron of a hospital on the coast, near Portsmouth. I am sure Grandmama would be willing to write to him and together they could help you become a member of the Royal College of Surgeons and find you a post at the hospital. With the Dowager Marchioness of Hune as your sponsor they are unlikely to turn you away.’
Raoul’s dark brows snapped together.
‘Cassie, I—’
She put up her hand. ‘We are at war again and it is unlikely to be over quickly. Your services will be in great demand, I am sure, and your skills would save many lives.’
There, it was done. Raoul was looking stunned, Grandmama was silent but approving. Cassie felt her spirit disintegrating. She must go if she was not to disgrace herself. She forced a smile to her lips.
‘Now, I pray you will both excuse me if I do not join you for dinner tonight. I shall lie down for a little while and ask Fingle to send me up a supper tray. So I will say goodbye to you now, Monsieur Doulevant, but believe me when I say I wish you every happiness.’
With that Cassie gave a little curtsy and, keeping her head high, she walked quickly from the room.
* * *
Raoul stared at the closed door, trying to bring his chaotic thoughts into some sort of order. He was hardly aware of the marchioness’s deep sigh.
‘My granddaughter must love you very much to put your happiness before her own.’
There was a rustle of silks as the old lady hunted for her handkerchief.
She gave a little tsk of impatience, ‘Oh, go after her, sir. Ask her to be your wife. Tell her if she wishes to marry a mere surgeon I will not stand in her way.’
Slowly Raoul shook his head.
‘Lady Cassandra deserves better than to take second place to my work.’
‘I doubt she would agree with you,’ replied Lady Hune.
‘She will, in time. Whatever I choose to do I will hurt her, but if I may use the analogy, I know that sometimes one must lose the limb to save the life.’ He was still staring at the door, but slowly his thoughts settled and he turned to face the marchioness. ‘Very well, then, ma’am, if you can help me to find a post as a surgeon I will accept your help and I will thank you for it.’
Her hand clenched upon the black cane and she said sharply, ‘Let us understand one another, monsieur. I will fund you while you obtain the necessary membership of the College of Surgeons and I will do what I can to find you a position. You will be paid adequately, I have no doubt, but there can be no advancement in society, no opportunity to make a fortune.’
‘I do not want a fortune.’
‘But without the means to support her you cannot
hope to marry my granddaughter.’
‘I understand that, ma’am. I have no hopes in that quarter.’
‘And you will not try to contact Cassandra again?’
‘You have my word.’ Raoul met the faded old eyes steadily. ‘It is over.’
* * *
He left Chantreys the following morning, driving away into a grey dawn with the first chill of winter frosting the grass.
Chapter Twelve
Gosport, Hampshire—February 1804
‘I have shut up the house, sir, and made up the fire in your bedchamber. If that is all, sir, I will bid you goodnight.’
‘Yes, thank you, Slinden. Goodnight.’
As the servant closed the door Raoul leaned back in his chair and stretched his feet towards the crackling blaze in the hearth. Perhaps he would have just one more glass of wine before he went to bed. Only one, though, because he would have to rise betimes and return to the hospital. He had received word only this evening that another ship had docked and the wounded would be transported to Gosport overnight.
Even in the few months he had been at the small hospital the number of injured men returning from the ongoing war with France had risen. It was already being suggested that he should be promoted to chief surgeon, the trustees recognising his superior knowledge and ability, but the daily round was gruelling. He and his fellow medical staff—surgeons, physicians and medical assistants—worked through all the daylight hours and often Raoul would continue far into the night. Even when he had finished at the hospital local people would turn up at his door with a variety of injuries and ailments, for word had soon spread that kind-hearted ‘Mr Doolevant’, as they called him, would help them if he could. And without charge, too, if they had no money. He rarely had a moment to himself.
One would have thought that such a busy life would leave him little time to think of Cassandra, but it was not the case. He missed her so much it was a physical pain. She was like a ghost at his shoulder; whenever he was operating he remembered how she worked with him at Flagey, if he saw a pretty brunette in the street he would think of Cassie and when he lay down each night she haunted his dreams. Cassie as he had first seen her, fighting off her attackers; Cassie laughing and teasing him; Cassie naked in his arms...
Return of the Runaway Page 22