“No, I told you where I wanted you to take me.” Logan looked out the window. He wasn’t from Vermont, and for all he knew the cabbie could have been taking him anywhere and he wouldn’t know because he’d only spent a few weeks in Vermont before he was arrested. “What’s Jade’s?” Logan had a clue, but wanted confirmation.
“A strip club. It’s real up-scale and all that. If you need a woman,” the cabbie wiggled his eyes in the rearview mirror, “I can take you there.”
Logan needed a woman all right, but the one he needed had suddenly gotten cold feet. It didn’t make sense, but Logan wasn’t going to push. He had enough money to stay at a hotel for a week, and that was where he was going to stay until he could convince Katie that her fears were unfounded.
“Just take me to the hotel. I can find my own woman.” Logan had found her and he’d fight for her even if he had to fight her fears. Someone had told him when he was younger that he’d find the woman who would send him to his knees, and Logan believed it was Katie.
Feeling a bit of the stress lift from his shoulders, Logan gazed out the window again, finally seeing what his heart had been hiding from him. After eight long years, Logan was free. He only had to meet with his parole officer once before he was sure he’d be granted permission to head back to Kentucky to get his finances in order. Trent had hired him a new lawyer and had him working on allowing him to leave for Kentucky for good. It was something Jake was supposed to be working on, but after firing him, Logan was sure he’d left things unhandled. Still, Logan couldn’t leave or even focus on leaving until he fixed things with Katie.
It was almost May, yet there was still a chill in the air and a light dusting of white snow on the ground when Logan got out of the cab to enter the hotel lobby. Logan quickly checked in and headed straight to the mini bar. He’d never considered himself a heavy drinker, but the stress of his situation with Katie and his future had him real thirsty. He’d downed the first bottle of vodka, and the second, in a matter of moments. Instantly, he reached for the third. There was no way a man like Logan—at two hundred and twenty pounds—was going to even get buzzed off the little bottles in the mini fridge.
Realizing he was hungry, Logan searched for a menu in the room, and found it neatly folded on the bed. His stomach growled as he read through it, searching for alcohol. Deciding to eat as well as drink, Logan placed an order for the biggest, juiciest steak on the menu and a mini bottle of Jack. He lay back on the bed, feeling the warm effects of the three mini bottles of vodka.
“Shit,” Logan groaned. After getting the letter, he’d forgone breakfast and was released on an empty ass stomach. He may have been a big man, but an empty stomach combined with the fact that he’d not drank liquor in so long had his head fuzzy. Stubborn mule that he was, he ignored his head’s plea for him to slow down. Up and at the mini bar again, Logan found that there was another small drawer to the left of the fridge. He grabbed two more bottles of liquor, and opened the small drawer.
Inside was a razor, along with some other toiletries, but what caught Logan’s attention were the condoms. He pulled them out and searched through the sizes; picking out his own, he put them in his pocket and went back to the bed. Logan downed both bottles, laying back when the room started to spin. He felt like a damned fool. He needed to call Katie, needed to speak to her. However, just as he was about to lift up, his body rejected that idea and came up with one of its own. Logan tried again, and sighed in relief when he was on his feet. He reached the phone and dialed the number he’d memorized months ago.
On the second ring, Katie answered and Logan was stunned into silence. Her voice was so soft and broken that he could feel her pain through the phone. He wanted to curse and fight the son of a bitch who’d hurt her. He spoke, praying that his words weren’t too slurred.
“Baby?” At least that’s what Logan wanted to say. He cleared his throat and tried again. “Baby, what’s going on?”
Katie’s voice broke when she started to speak, and she broken down into sobs. Logan felt as if his heart had been carved from his chest. He was out of prison and his woman needed him, but he was too damned twisted to get to her.
“Goddamn it, Katie,” he said in a rush. “Baby, fucking tell me what’s wrong.” Her sobbing answer wounded him.
“You, you asshole! You had me worried. Last night you said you’d call in the morning and you never did!” Her words cut him just as sure as if she stood in front of him with a knife and slashed him to pieces.
Logan tried to gather his thoughts, but all he could see was her letter. “You sent me a letter. You told me to stay away from you.”
Katie’s sobs had turned into hiccups, and Logan longed to be there with her. He’d swear on anything she wanted him to tell her that he loved her. All she had to do was ask him, that was it. Since Logan was drunk, he knew saying it was wrong, so he didn’t. When he said it, he’d be sober and it’d be after he showed how much he loved her.
“I . . . I never sent a—” She paused. “Wait, are you drunk?”
Logan swayed. “Um . . . a little. I’m at my hotel.” Her whimper made him regret opening his drunken mouth. “Sorry, I was pissed and angry that you’d changed your mind, so I had a little to drink.”
“What letter are you talking about, Logan? I sent you my address. You are supposed to be here, with me. You promised.”
He couldn’t see her, but he knew she was sobbing and it was somehow his fault. “I have the letter you sent me. I swear, I’ll come to you now if that’s what you want. Baby, just tell me what you want, please.” Logan reached out to steady himself on the wall. His heart sped up in his chest and he couldn’t catch his breath. He’d felt this feeling before when he’d learned his Aunt Elma had died. It was fear mingled with heartbreak and he couldn’t take it. He couldn’t lose Katie to some stupid mail mix up.
“Logan, are you okay?” Her voice rang clear through the phone. Logan was no fool; he needed her, wanted her, and loved her.
Logan squeezed his eyes shut and pushed away from the wall. He was a grown ass man, but he wasn’t above needing his woman. How ironic that it’d be Katie helping him nurse a hangover in the morning. “Only if you come to me. Can you do that for me?”
Outside of Logan’s hotel room, Katie glanced down at the tray of food. With shaky hands, she lifted up the metal top to see that he’d eaten steak and potatoes. Steak sauce spilled over the side of the container, and a piece of meat was still left on the plate beside half eaten potatoes. Also, to her dismay, the receipt showed that Logan had ordered a mini bottle of liquor, too. He’d seemed drunk when he’d called her, and Katie hoped that Logan hadn’t drank any more. She was already tense as it was, and the thought of a drunken Logan made her more nervous yet shiver in anticipation.
The way he’d spoken to her on the phone made her wonder if drinking would loosen his tongue, since it seemed to make him more apologetic. In reality, she felt she was the one who needed a drink. Katie lowered the lid and took a deep breath. She was anxious as hell, so she paced the hall for a moment with the key card –he had left at the front desk—gripped tightly in her sweaty palm.
After she’d disconnected with Logan, she’d dressed in what she thought was her cutest outfit. Of course Teal would have called it too tame, but Katie thought she looked good in her skinny jeans, which hugged her hips in all of the right places. And she topped it off with her favorite white cashmere sweater which showed her tasteful, yet sexy cleavage.
Katie stopped pacing and bit her lip.
“Shit,” she muttered to herself, and looked down at her clothes. Maybe they were too tame for Logan. Maybe after eight years, he’d want his woman to look sexy, and Katie felt very far from it at the moment. She placed a hand on her stomach as it quivered in nervous excitement. Her hands were trembling and her palms were wet. She didn’t berate herself for the apprehension she felt; she knew what was going to happen when she went in that room. Logan wanted her, and she craved him just as much.
/> Months of yearning and casual flirting, plus the pent-up sexual frustration, had Katie torn in two directions. She wanted to run, but her heart and certain parts of her body demanded satisfaction, compelling her to stay. What if Logan didn’t find her sexually attractive? He’d never been with a black woman before, and while Katie wanted to be his first, she wasn’t sure she was up to the task.
The longer she stood outside of his door, the more her uncertainty piled up. Her reasons to run were starting to overwhelm her reasons to swipe the card and walk through the door.
Tired of letting uncertainties and trepidation make choices for her, Katie turned to the door and marched forward. There was no need to be on edge anymore, Logan was her man. “He’s mine,” she whispered, as if it were an affirmation. With a reassuring nod, Katie swiped the keycard, waited for the beep, and pushed open the door.
Once inside, she looked around but didn’t see Logan. Good! Her hands were shaking so bad she was amazed she was even able to hold the key card in her hand. Katie closed the door and leaned into it. Her nerves hadn’t caught up to her just yet and they were all over the place.
Walking further into the room, she glanced around. The king-size bed was made—nice and neat—and there was a bag on the desk in the corner. Katie moved toward it, and took a quick glance inside to see Logan’s meager belongings: a wallet, manila folder, a pair of jeans, and a shirt. Feeling like a snoop, Katie closed the bag and moved away. Further into the room, and closer to the bathroom, Katie could hear the shower running. Her body told her go inside, but her fears had her moving in the other direction.
Meandering to the bed, she perched on the side, waiting for her man to come out. Her heart was beating so fast she feared she’d have a heart attack. Kicking off her heels, she scooted back on the bed, placing her feet beneath her. Her hands were shaking—hell, she was shaking—and when the water stopped, Katie nearly jumped off the bed.
She removed her coat and laid it next to her. Next, she pulled her hair out of the bun and let it fall to her shoulders. She hoped Logan liked her shoulder-length hair. Katie ran her fingers through her curls, helping the strands feather against her cheeks.
The bathroom doorknob turned and Katie pulled her hands from her hair, glancing over her body. The normal self-consciousness any woman would have in this moment, assaulted her. She looked back to see the door open, and Logan’s large body filled the doorway—a towel fitted tightly around his waist, and another in his hand drying his hair—and her breath caught. Steam escaped from the bathroom behind him, and the sight of Logan brought tears to her eyes.
The fear that she’d been fighting disappeared, and was replaced with the need to hold him, touch him, and kiss him. The tattoos he’d explained covered his upper arms and chest glistened with water from the shower. Logan hadn’t been lying when he said he worked out on a daily basis, cords of hard muscle confirmed his words. Katie swallowed hard as her eyes roamed over his chest.
When she finally thought to look back up at his eyes, they held her in their gaze. She was frozen, unable to move. Logan dropped the towel from his hand and walked toward her; he was so tall, he had to duck under the doorway. Suddenly, Katie could breathe again, but her breath came in crazy pants. She was dizzy and her brain wasn’t functioning properly. She squeezed her legs together as soon as the warm sensation assaulted her.
As if she and Logan were so connected that he could sense her need, he moved to her in a quick and deliberate pace. Soon, he stood in front of her.
Katie released a noise that sounded like a whimper, but she wasn’t sure and didn’t have time to question it. Logan’s heavily tattooed arm reached for her, pulling her up off the bed and to his lips with a swiftness that had her head spinning and her core clenching. His arms were around her in a quick second; his hand tangled in her hair as another found its way to her face.
Logan’s touch was so hot, it burned Katie’s tender flesh. Her moan was cut short as he deepened their kiss, stealing her breath . . . along with her soul. She’d never been kissed so deeply in her life, and she fought to keep up. There were no dueling tongues or clanking of teeth, yet Logan invaded her mouth thoroughly and allowed her the same.
He tasted of mint, and was so sweet that Katie needed more. She moved her hips against his now long, hardened length, but the thick towel and her jeans fought against her pleasure. Something akin to a whimper left her throat as she bucked against him, needing more, begging for more. Logan pulled away and Katie took in some much-needed air.
He placed a chaste kiss on her neck. “Hello,” he murmured as he placed even more warm kisses along her neck.
Katie sighed. “I like these kind of hellos,” she said breathlessly. He released her, and she slid down him—past the massive bulge threatening to escape the towel—until her feet hit the floor. Her fears had seemingly made their way to the back of her mind. He kept his arms around her while his eyes roamed over her face. His eyes were so green, Katie couldn’t believe they were real.
“Pictures didn’t do you justice.” Logan pushed his hands up the back of Katie’s shirt and caressed her skin, causing her to shudder in his arms. He chuckled when she ducked her head to his chest. He was so damned tall, Katie feared she had to climb him like a tree to get to his lips again, and that was what she wanted—to taste him.
Swallowing hard, she pushed away her nerves. “Logan,” she sighed, cuddling closer. She wasn’t sure what she was going to say, or if there was anything to say at all, but when he pulled her close and whispered in her ear, Katie nearly lost her balance.
With her hands on his chest, she gently pushed herself back and gazed in his eyes. Since he’d recently taken a shower, he smelled of sweet soap and shampoo. Logan’s eyes were clear as a sunny day, so Katie couldn’t tell if he’d drank the liquor he’d bought or not.
“What’d you say?” She’d heard it, but damned if she didn’t need that phrase repeated.
He smirked. “I said I love you.”
The words echoed in her ears. She wanted to fight them, but couldn’t. She felt the same way, and no matter what anyone said, Katie planned on showing Logan how much she loved him every day.
A sigh of relief escaped her lips. “I love you, too,” she admitted. She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him. “When I came into this room, I was so scared, I wanted to run. My head was spinning, but then you came out of that door and the world stilled a bit.”
Logan gave her a gentle squeeze.
“And when you put your arms around me, my world stopped. Instantly, all of the shit that was blurry and unclear, just disappeared.”
His eyes narrowed slightly. “What were you unclear about?” he asked, confusion wrinkling his brow.
Katie tucked her head into the crook of his neck, too embarrassed to tell him. She didn’t want to bring up their differences because she thought if she reminded him of them, he would want to walk away.
He softly kissed her neck and her cheeks. “Tell me what had you unclear, baby.”
Katie was glad he’d used the past tense. “I’m not uncertain anymore,” she looked up at him, “but I was afraid you wouldn’t want me. However, from the way you greeted me, I’d have to say that was an unfounded fear.” Logan’s hands roamed down to Katie’s ass and he pulled her closer.
Moving against her, he asked, “Does it feel like I don’t want you?” As his bulge pushed against her stomach, his need was made clear.
Katie’s face heated and she shook her head. Grasping his arms, she closed her eyes. He hadn’t even touched her in her most intimate spots, yet her body felt close to a release. Maybe it was because she knew what Logan was capable of. His kiss demanded things from her body that she’d gladly give, and the waiting was killing her.
She bit back a moan when he leaned down, tracing his warm tongue across her lips before she let him in without hesitation. Katie moved into him, giving all she could with her kiss. She hadn’t spoken, but she prayed he could feel and taste her love in the kiss. Pul
ling away to breathe, she bit her lip. “I told you, unfounded.”
Logan chuckled deeply. He took a step back. “I want you, Katie. Never think I don’t.” He moved over to his bag and searched through it. “But you do need to explain this.” His voice was different, harder.
Logan removed the manila folder, rifled through it, and pulled out a yellow paper. “You asked why I didn’t call you when I got out?”
Nodding, Katie walked over beside him and took the paper from him to read the words. Katie was shaking her head before she even finished the letter.
A cold fear snuck up her spine. “I . . . I didn’t write this, Logan.” She searched his eyes, hoping he’d believe her. “I sent you my address, and told you that it was the blue house on the hill. If you give a cab driver the address, they’d only take you as far as the driveway, but you need to go up the hill to get to my house.” Katie looked away from Logan, unsure if he believed her or not. The writing was very similar to hers, but Katie didn’t use lined paper.
Logan took the sheet of paper from her shaking hands and placed it on the table. Sitting down in the chair, he pulled Katie onto his lap where she nestled close and wrapped her hands around his neck. “You believe me, right? I hope you know I wouldn’t play any games with you like that.” She prayed he did; she’d never do something like that. She wanted him, needed him, and she thought she’d proven that to him.
The imploring in her voice had Logan inclined to believe her. He was so damned surprised to get the letter asking him to leave her alone, he’d done just that. He wasn’t sure why she’d pushed him away. Everything had been calm and smooth, and then he got the letter. Something wasn’t right, but he knew one thing. . .
“Yeah, Katie, I believe you.”
She appeared relieved. Logan rubbed her back and placed a kiss on top of her head. Her unruly curls tickled his nose and he kissed her again.
Incarcerated: Letters From Inmate 92510 Page 13