Her expression brightened. ‘How about lunch? There are some lovely country pubs in the area. We could just relax and talk.’
He glanced back out of the window as Leonie began to walk back towards the house. ‘I’ll take a raincheck on lunch, Sarah,’ he told her absently. ‘But I am taking the afternoon off,’ he murmured softly, his gaze still on Leonie.
CHAPTER NINE
SHE SHOULD tell him about Michael now, should explain, before Jake did.
But it was a long time since Leonie had felt so at peace, sitting there on a blanket on the ground beneath the willow tree that hung over the side of the meandering river, the picnic basket open on the blanket and their lunch spread out upon it.
Hawk had invited her out on a picnic lunch, and although she had known it would be more sensible to refuse, she hadn’t been able to resist the idea. And with Holly fast asleep in her cot after her own lunch just the two of them had set out.
June had surpassed herself with the food she had provided, even including a bottle of chilled wine for them to enjoy with the fried chicken.
Now only the debris from the meal was left, and the two of them lay back on the blanket, too full to move a muscle. She should tell Hawk about Michael now, Leonie knew, but somehow she didn’t want to spoil the beauty of the afternoon.
She glanced at Hawk as he lay beside her, his eyes closed against the glare of the sun. He was the father of her child, a child she was finding it increasingly difficult to think about giving up. But her alternative was to marry this man. What sort of husband would he make?
‘Tell me about Amy,’ she encouraged before she could stop herself.
He stiffened, opening one eye to glance at her, then turning away again as he put his hands up behind his head to rest back against them.
Why had she asked him that? Even if his marriage to Amy had been a success, it didn’t mean that any relationship they entered into would meet the same fate!
‘She was tall and blonde, beautiful, with a wicked sense of humour.’ He smiled at the memory.
Leonie waited, knowing there had to be more than that, wanting to know about their marriage.
‘We were both a little spoilt.’ He glanced at Leonie, as if expecting her to dispute the ‘little’. She didn’t. He smiled, closing his eyes again. ‘We always had fun together, even when Hal put in an appearance exactly nine months after our honeymoon! When Amy’s parents questioned the prudence of that she told them to be grateful it wasn’t six, seven, or eight months,’ he grinned. ‘They never said another word about Hal being born too soon after we were married!’
‘I can imagine,’ Leonie said dryly.
He shrugged. ‘It wouldn’t have bothered us when he was born—we wanted him. I guess we were children playing at being parents. Whatever. It seemed to work out okay. When Hal started kindergarten Amy began working part-time—she’d always been interested in interior design. She’d only been at work for a week when some kid high on drugs decided it might be nice to drive on the wrong side of the road for a while, just for the hell of it, you understand,’ he bit out harshly. ‘He survived the crash, Amy didn’t,’ he supplied abruptly.
Leonie drew in a harsh breath. ‘I’m sorry.’
‘So am I; she was a beautiful woman.’ Hawk shrugged. ‘But I didn’t really tell you about her, did I?’ he realised. ‘She was witty, vivacious—we were good friends as well as lovers.’
And he had loved the other woman very much, it was there in every word he spoke about her. How could he want to settle for less in a second marriage?
He suddenly rolled over, leaning on his elbows to look down at her. ‘Now do you want to hear about Leonie?’ he prompted huskily.
He was so close she daren’t move, his arm pressed lightly against hers, the warmth of his breath lightly fanning her cheek.
She gave a nervous smile. ‘I don’t think—’
‘I was in love with Amy at an age when I looked for idealism in everything, when I believed there was only one way to love.’ Hawk spoke thoughtfully, but his gaze was fixed compellingly on hers. ‘If Amy had lived I’m sure we would still be together,’ he said without hesitation. ‘That we would still have been happy together when we were both eighty. But it would have been a love that would have been changed by time, a mellow love, maybe even a love that we took for granted. Losing Amy the way that I did has taught me never to take anything for granted again. She isn’t alive to share that love with me when we’re both eighty, but I don’t think—I’m sure of it!—that she would have begrudged my finding happiness with someone else.’ His eyes were narrowed.
‘Hawk—’
‘We’re here so fleetingly, Leonie,’ he continued with feeling. ‘If there’s more after this I don’t know, so we have to accept the life we have now and make the most of it. I want to live the rest of my life with you and Holly.’
She was having difficulty breathing, emotionally moved by his impassioned speech, having difficulty concentrating as he began to speak again.
‘I understand your first marriage was lousy,’ he rasped. ‘I realise that’s bound to make you wary about trying again, but you have our child to consider. And I want to take care of Holly. And you,’ he added huskily.
‘No!’ she denied harshly, shaking her head frantically, trying to get up.
Hawk held her down with his arm across her breasts. ‘I love our daughter very much,’ he grated. ‘I love her, and she’s going to have both her parents in her life!’ he told her firmly. ‘Whether you like it or not.’
She couldn’t marry this man. He would demand too much from her, take too much.
His eyes suddenly darkened. ‘Leonie…!’ He gave a throaty groan.
If he kissed her—
She was lost. Like the very first time he had touched her all those months ago, she became his slave as he began to make love to her.
‘Oh God, Leonie!’ His mouth devoured hers with desperation, his arms about her as he pulled her up on top of him, one hand cradling the back of her head as he increased the pressure of her mouth against his.
A weak languor claimed her body as his hands impatiently caressed her from thigh to shoulder, groaning his satisfaction as he released the catch to her bra.
‘No, Hawk,’ she gasped as he would have removed her clothes. ‘It’s too soon! The baby—’
‘Trust me, Leonie.’ His big hands cradled either side of her face as he held her gaze with his. ‘Trust me,’ he repeated huskily.
She was a prisoner of the raw sensuality in his eyes, nodding slow agreement, knowing this man would never physically hurt her, that he had only ever given her pleasure.
He dispensed with her blouse and his shirt completely, the gentle breeze instantly cooling their skin before her nipples nestled against the blazing heat of his chest. The feel of the silken hair against the aching tips made her gasp raggedly.
‘You like that?’ Hawk lifted her slightly so that the sensitised nubs received the slightest of caresses—almost driving Leonie into a delirium of pleasure. And then he was above her once more, crushing her beneath him as his mouth ravaged hers with a sensual rhythm.
‘Open your legs to me, Leonie,’ he urged heatedly.
She did so instantly, feeling his weight shift as he settled himself between her thighs, the hardness of him there touching her through the thin barrier of her cotton skirt and lace briefs. And then he began to move, slowly, erotically, in a mime of lovemaking!
His fingers captured, then tugged, on her erect nipples, applying just enough pressure to cause her to cry out as he sensed her need.
Something inside her was building out of control, a need, an ache, that his sensual movements against her just couldn’t assuage. She gave a whimper of desperation.
‘All right, love,’ he kissed his way down her throat to her breasts. ‘It’s all right,’ he soothed as his tongue traced a moist pattern across both breasts, taking his time drawing one of the painful peaks into the moist haven of his mouth.
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It still wasn’t enough. She was on fire for him, she needed—Oh God, she needed—
He knew, Hawk knew what she wanted, his mouth abandoning her breasts now as his tongue dipped erotically inside her navel, drawing the skirt and panties out of his way to throw them impatiently to one side. Leonie groaned her frustration as he became suddenly still. And then she knew what had halted him; she could feel his hand tenderly caressing the scar giving birth to Holly had left on her body.
‘Tell me she was worth it, Leonie!’ he groaned. ‘Oh God, tell me you don’t regret having borne my child!’
‘I don’t regret it, Hawk.’ She gave a fevered shake of her head. ‘Holly was worth it—all of it.’
‘Aah!’ He briefly closed his eyes in heartfelt satisfaction with her response.
Holly had been worth it, she was worth all the pain that was to follow too. Leonie felt she had been privileged to be Holly’s mother. Her daughter. She was finally coming to realise that that was what Holly was, that her daughter was healthy and strong, that she had no reason to fear losing her except to this man. Oh God, the joy of knowing her daughter was healthy after the agony of losing Daniel the way that she had.
‘Marry me, Leonie,’ urged Hawk determinedly. ‘Marry me, and we can share our wonderful daughter for the rest of our lives.’
She wanted to keep Holly, had to keep the beautiful child that was part her and part this man beside her!
‘Yes, Hawk,’ she gasped, ‘I—I’ll marry you.’
Relief darkened his eyes, as he moved to cradle each side of her face with his strong hands. ‘You won’t regret it, Leonie,’ he promised gruffly. ‘I’m going to make sure you never know another day’s unhappiness in your life!’
From any other man it would have been an impossible promise to keep, but she knew Hawk was quite capable of doing everything in his power to make sure that promise was fulfilled.
And then she couldn’t think any more as he began to kiss her once again.
* * *
He had believed the taste of her breasts was the most erotic experience he had ever known, but as she opened to him completely he knew he was in paradise.
She was so beautiful here, the soft velvet of rose petals moistened with the gentleness of dew. He kissed each of those petals until she flowered beneath his penetration.
He could feel her tension rising now, cupping her tight little bottom to offer her up to him like a beautiful sacrifice, deeper and deeper as her breathing became a fevered rasp and her thighs tightened about him in pleading demand.
The flick of his tongue made her fingers clutch into the blanket beneath them, and as he moistly laved her flowering bud he could hear the choked sobs in her throat.
She was so close, flowing against him, and although the taste of her was driving him wild, making him long to prolong her pleasure until she was insane with the need for him to give her fulfilment, he also wanted to feel her pulse against him as her desire reached its peak, to know he had given her pleasure and not pain.
She was so hot and moist against him, gasping each time he touched her now, her hips lifting off the blanket to him, pressing harder and harder against his mouth, driving him deeper and deeper, pushing her higher and higher.
And then she couldn’t go any higher, as spasms of pleasure drove her against him again and again, convulsing as the heated ache became a molten flow that went on and on for ever.
* * *
She found it difficult to look at him, the warm ache that still heated her body reminding her of just how much she had ‘trusted’ Hawk beneath that willow tree beside the river.
She had never experienced anything like the pleasure he gave her so unselfishly, held against his chest afterwards as he soothed the convulsing of her body down to a tremble. Every time she remembered her abandonment beneath the intimacy of the willow the trembling began again.
Leonie had been completely shattered by the explosions inside her body, and she pressed her thighs together now as she ached there once again.
‘Why don’t you have a nap?’ Hawk turned to glance at her as he sat behind the wheel of the car driving them back to the house. ‘You look tired,’ he sympathised.
She was agitated! She felt as if she could sleep for a week, and then still wake up feeling lethargic!
And she had agreed to marry him. She suddenly felt panicked at the thought of being that close to anyone again.
His hand suddenly covered hers as it moved nervously against her thigh. ‘We didn’t do anything wrong just now, Leonie,’ he told her gently. ‘We didn’t hurt anyone,’ he added huskily.
This man hadn’t done anything wrong; he had done everything oh, so right. But he was wrong about the pain; he must be suffering agonies of unfulfilment. She had wanted to ease his discomfort, but he had insisted he would be all right. He obviously was all right, but the strain hadn’t left him.
‘All right,’ he finally gave a ragged sigh, ‘I took unfair advantage of you. I shouldn’t—’
‘Don’t be ridiculous, Hawk,’ she cut in sharply. ‘You made beautiful love to me.’
‘I’m never going to apologise for making love to you,’ he shook his head firmly. ‘I proposed to you at a time when your defences were down. You’re perfectly at liberty to tell me to go to hell now that—now that—’
‘The madness has passed?’ she finished dryly.
Hawk sighed. ‘I want to marry you, Leonie,’ he bit out. ‘I want that any way I can get it. But you’ll only end up hating me if you feel I’ve forced you into it,’ he acknowledged heavily.
He hadn’t forced her into anything, nothing at all. She had wanted to marry him as surely as she had wanted him to make love to her. Oh yes, she was nervous about being anyone’s wife again, she feared the closeness of such a relationship, but she didn’t fear either of those things as much as she did being without Holly. She loved her daughter enough to want to give her the best, and that included having both her parents.
‘I’ve accepted your proposal, Hawk, and I’ll stick by my decision,’ she told him firmly. ‘Although I do think that perhaps we should wait until Hal and Laura are married before making any announcement ourselves,’ she added with a frown.
His brows rose. ‘Don’t you think we have more reason to be married before them?’ he drawled.
‘I don’t think another week or so is going to make any difference to Holly’s legitimacy now, do you?’ she said wryly.
‘She’s a Sinclair, damn it,’ scowled Hawk. ‘And anyone who casts aspersions on her birth had better remember that!’
She smiled at his protection of their daughter. ‘I doubt if you’ll let them forget it,’ she teased.
He gave a rueful smile. ‘I may be a bastard, but no one is going to call my daughter one,’ he acknowledged dryly.
Michael had called Holly a bastard. But she didn’t feel like talking about Michael just now, not when she had just agreed to marry Hawk.
* * *
He should never have agreed to waiting before announcing his claim on her, Hawk thought, although if Jake didn’t already know that after the way he had warned the other man off Leonie this morning then he was being decidedly obtuse!
Leonie had been so determined they shouldn’t detract from Hal’s and Laura’s big day by announcing that they were arranging one of their own, and because she had finally agreed to marry him—some time—he hadn’t pushed the point, secure in the knowledge that she would keep to her word. He hadn’t realised that agreeing to that condition would leave him standing impotently by in the background while every other man in the vicinity vied for her attention!
Stephen had taken his father’s place at Leonie’s side now, the father and son having been avoiding each other studiously since Jake and Sarah had arrived at the house for dinner as Leonie’s guests.
He couldn’t just stand here nursing this glass of whisky while those two clowns—
‘Calm down, Dad,’ Hal drawled quietly at his side. ‘I can see
the smoke starting to come out of your ears!’
Hawk gave his son an impatient scowl. ‘Very funny,’ he snapped. ‘But if Stephen makes her laugh one more time I’ll—’
‘Come on, Dad,’ Hal chided soothingly. ‘I for one think it’s great that Leonie is laughing—no matter who or what’s the cause of it!’
Selfish bastard that he was, he wanted all her laughter to be for him. It was what had attracted him to her in the first place, and with its slow return he was falling more and more in love with her. But so was every other man in the room!
‘I know you’re right,’ he told Hal with a sigh. ‘I guess I’m just jealous,’ he admitted heavily. ‘You’re in love with Laura; you must know how I feel.’
‘Yes,’ Hal acknowledged ruefully. ‘How did your picnic go this afternoon?’
She agreed to marry me! She’s mine! Hawk wanted to shout it from the rooftops, but knowing how angry his little witchchild would be if he did that he wisely kept silent.
He gave the grimace of a smile. ‘I moved too fast—as usual.’ And he intended ‘moving that fast’ again, as often as Leonie would let him. Damn the frustration it left him feeling, he just wanted to be close to Leonie. And that was as close as he could get for the moment.
Hal shook his head. ‘I never thought I’d see the day you didn’t know how to handle a situation,’ he taunted.
‘If Leonie were a situation I probably could handle it,’ Hawk drawled. ‘It’s because she’s a woman, a very special woman, that I’m in difficulty.’
Hal’s expression softened as he watched Laura in conversation with Sarah. ‘It’s when they’re so special you don’t mind the occasional uncertainty that goes with loving them.’
Hawk looked sharply at his son. ‘You and Laura—’
‘Are fine,’ Hal assured him firmly, but the smile didn’t quite reach his eyes.
Hal was in love with Laura, he was sure of it. But something was obviously worrying his son. Could it have anything to do with that vulnerability he had seen in Laura before she went to meet Hal at the airport two days ago? The Brandon sisters seemed to have depths he and Hal couldn’t even guess at.
Just One Night (Presents Plus) Page 14