by R B Hilliard
Just as I grabbed the headboard, his knee pressed between my legs, moving them wider apart. I groaned in pleasure as he entered me from behind. Shifting both of his knees to the outside of mine, he forced my thighs closer together, restricting all movement.
“Are you holding on?” he strained.
“Yes,” I panted.
“Good girl.”
I wanted to ask him how this was going to work when, slowly, he started moving inside me. I felt his hands as they skimmed down my stomach, his fingers finding my center and, as he picked up speed, I realized why he wanted my legs together…..the friction. I was tightly gripped around every inch of him. My inner thighs were pressed together and rubbing him as he pulled out and pushed back in. The friction was mind blowing. This combined with his hand slowly strumming me was driving me insane. I hummed in pleasure and he picked up the pace, surging in and out of me, faster and harder. We were both on fire.
“I’m there baby,” he panted, “need you with me.” I screamed as he made me soar. Two more strokes and he shouted my name as he spilled himself inside me. Tears coursed down my face. For a moment in time I had him back. Nothing in the world would or could ever compare to Max McClellan. I was so screwed.
A ringing phone woke us up. Max was curled tightly around me and my head was resting on the inside of his arm.
“It’s yours,” I moaned. “Mine doesn’t sound like a dead goose.”
Reaching down, he snagged his phone from the pocket of his jeans. “Yo,” he groggily answered.
In order to give him some privacy, I decided to head to the bathroom. Halfway there, I heard him mutter, “No fucking way.” He sounded surprised.
I wonder who it is?
“Thank God it’s finally over,” he said, as I made my way back to the bedroom. He tossed his phone on the foot of the bed. Then, sitting up, he swung his feet to the side of the bed. My jaw dropped in complete awe when I saw his back.
How in the hell did I miss seeing this last night?
Spread across Max’s lower back was a stunningly beautiful tattoo of a hawk.
“Oooooo” I murmured, as I crawled across the bed to him. Reaching out, I ran my hand over it. “It’s beautiful.”
Looking over his shoulder at me, he smiled. “You like?”
“I like,” I whispered and reverently traced my fingers over it.
“Look closely at the left wing.”
I leaned down and turned my head sideways to read what was written on the left wing. It took me a minute to see it. Surprised, my eyes shot to his eyes. “It says Ellison.”
“Now look at the right wing.”
Always.
“You had Ellison Always permanently inked on your skin? Why?”
“That’s what I need to talk to you about. Unfortunately, it now will have to wait a while longer.”
My heart dropped. “What did you just say?” I wasn’t sure I heard him correctly.
“Something has happened and I have to go take care of it. I wasn’t supposed to come to Charlotte yet, but I couldn’t stay away. I have been waiting for this for five years. It’s the reason I had to leave you in the first place. The whole story will take too long to tell you right now and I have to go.”
Too shocked to speak, I sat there with my mouth hanging open. Grabbing my hand, he continued, “I will take care of this as quickly as I can and will be back before you know it, okay?”
“No,” I shook my head. “We are supposed to talk. I promised you. You promised me that after last night we would talk, so…. talk.”
“Look at me,” he commanded.
With tears in my eyes, I looked up at him and begged, “Please don’t leave me again, Max.”
He stroked his hand across my cheek. “I’m coming back. There is nothing left now that could keep me away from you.”
“I don’t believe you….I can’t.”
“I understand,” he patiently said. “How about I text you every day and call you every night? Will that make you feel better?” I nodded yes because the knot in my throat was too big to talk around.
Pulling me into his lap, he held me tight and sweetly kissed the tears away. Then, moving down, he kissed my nose and when he got to my mouth, slipped his tongue in and slowly stroked it against mine.
Not able to control it any longer, the damn broke and the heartache came pouring out.
“Please don’t cry. I’m not leaving you, I swear.” His voice hitched. “Hopefully this will only take a week. I swear, on everything I hold dear, that I will come back to you. You have to believe me.” He buried his head in my neck and broke down. We clung to each other and cried for all of the years we had lost.
A little while later, I lay across the bed watching him get dressed and wondered if this would be the last time I would ever see him.
“We’ll talk when I get back?” he asked, worry written all over his face.
To this I nodded and shrugged.
“Can you do something for me?”
I nodded, again, trying not to cry.
“Wait for our talk before doing anything rash or deciding anything life altering?”
I rolled my eyes at him. “You don’t ask for much, do you?”
His eyes pleaded with me. “Please?”
“Fine. But you better call and text every day.”
Smiling, he kissed me one last time and was out the door.
Great, how am I going to explain that I saw Max but still don’t know what happened five years ago?
After Max left I dragged my butt around all day moping. By the time my dad showed up I was a basket case of mixed emotions. I alternated randomly between love, sadness, anger and elation. As soon as I spotted the caddy rolling into the driveway, I was out the door. “Are you sure you want me here?” he joked as I helped him lug in three of his suitcases.
“I don’t think I’ve ever needed a dad more than I do right now.”
“Hey,” he paused. “What’s happened pretty girl?”
Walking into the living room, I sat down in my favorite chair and curled my legs under me. “Well, last night I decided that I needed a soak in the hot tub. So, I poured myself a glass of wine and hopped in. Then, I decided that more wine and music were a must. When I got back out to the tub, guess who had his gorgeous rear parked in it?”
He smirked. “Either Dillon or Max.”
“Max…in all his naked glory.”
“Did you kick him out?”
I looked into his stern fatherly face and squirmed. “Uh, not exactly.”
“Did you happen to be in all your glory too?”
This made me flinch. “Kind of.”
“Tell me you did not sleep with the man who has left you heartbroken for all these years. The man who, without the courtesy of a word, note or sign to the supposed ‘love of his life,’ disappeared off of the face of the damned planet. Tell me you were smarter than that, Ellison?”
Wow, he is really angry about this…
“Gee, when you put it that way, it sounds really bad, doesn’t it?” I winced.
“Jesus, honey, what am I going to do with you?”
“He was my first everything dad,” I quietly replied. “He’s all I have wanted for five years.”
“And now?”
I shrugged.
“Well, at least tell me you were smart enough to use protection.”
My eyes bugged in shock when he said this. Having the sex talk with Aunt Elizabeth was bad enough, but as a twenty-three year old woman with her dad?
Hell no.
Taking my silence to mean that I had unprotected sex infuriated him. “Are you shitting me Ellie?” I had never seen him this mad. Looking around the room, he asked, “Where is Max now? Why isn’t he here with you? This is not completely on you. It’s on him too.”
Reaching out, I grabbed his hand. “Relax, dad. No need to call out the sex police. I’m on the pill.”
“That’s beside the point, Ellie. Are you one hundred percent sure tha
t Max is clean? Just because you didn’t sleep around doesn’t mean that he didn’t. Did he show you his test results? And where the hell is he now?”
Of course, none of this ever occurred to me. “He had to go, I faintly replied. He said that he would explain everything to me when he returned. He’s supposed to call and text every day that he is away.” I was started to fidget under his scrutiny.
“Do you believe him?”
“I want to. I really, really want to.”
“What about Dillon?”
I rolled my eyes. “Who knows? Maybe I’ll decide after I sleep unprotected with him, too.”
He laughed. “Okay sarcastic Sally, point taken. I just don’t want you hurt...or accidentally pregnant.”
“Well, after last night, even if Max and I don’t work out….I wouldn’t turn to Dillon.”
His eyebrows raised and the serious look on his face made me laugh. “Is it strange that we are talking like this?” I asked. “I mean, I don’t really know exactly how daughters are supposed to talk to their fathers.”
He smiled and touched his chest. “I think we can’t go wrong if we do what feels right, in here. But, I think you owe Dillon the courtesy of telling him you are not interested. Don’t string him along, especially if you already know he is not for you.”
“I won’t. In fact, I already texted him this morning and told him I wanted to talk for a minute after our Thursday shift.”
Joss came over later that afternoon to talk about wedding plans, parties and time frames. I didn’t want her to know about last night. It was mine and I wasn’t ready to share.
We were in the middle of deciding what color the bridesmaids’ dresses should be when I got a text from Max. I opened it up and read while trying to play it casual in front of Joss.
-Gorgeous, can’t stop thinking about you, last night AND this morning. Will get back to you as soon as I can, promise. -Max
I quickly texted him back. Joss is here going over wedding details. I can text more when she leaves. I have been thinking about last night, too. ~ E
“Who’s texting you?” Joss practically sang.
Hitting vibrate, I dropped it into my lap. “No one.”
“Liar, I bet it is Max.”
“What makes you say that?”
“Hmmm, maybe because he disappeared last night and called Kurt this morning and asked him to keep an eye on you while he is away.”
“Why would he feel the need to do that?” I wondered if I should feel flattered or angry.
“Maybe because he is worried about someone named Dillon?”
Frowning, I shook my head, “No way.”
“Yes way,” she mocked and nodded her head.
This surprised me, especially after last night. “What does he think is going to happen with Dillon?”
“It’s not you he’s worried about Ellie. It’s D.”
“Why, though? What aren’t you telling me?” I asked, hitting her on the shoulder.
“Well, apparently D talked to Kurt and told him that you texted him and wanted to hang out after work on Thursday. Dillon is excited because he plans on finally getting you where he’s wanted you for months. He told Kurt what he was planning and Kurt freaked. Anyway, Max called Kurt on his way to the trial and told Kurt to watch out for you. Kurt told Max about D’s intentions toward you and Max is majorly pissed now, as is Kurt. Kurt wants you to take the week off, Ellie.”
I held up my hand to stop her dissertation. “Hold it blabber butt. Let’s go in order here. First, I told Dillon I wanted to ‘talk’ after work on Thursday, not ‘hang out’. Second, what does Dillon want to do to me? Not that I would go there with him. And third, what trial?”
Innocently batting her lashes, she pretended that she hadn’t slipped and said something that she shouldn’t. “What?”
“You said that Max was on his way to ‘the trial.’ What did you mean by that?”
“Uhhh.” I could see the wheels turning.
“Cut the innocent crap. You’ve already let the cat out. Now explain before I have to threaten you with bodily harm.”
“Max needs to tell you about it, Ellie, not me,” she whined.
“I will let him tell me, but since he’s not here, I want to know what… trial….” I stressed.
Sighing dramatically she said, “Okay, I’ll tell you but you have to promise not to tell that I told you first.”
I motioned for her to get on with it. “Yes, yes, whatever.”
“Something happened to Max, Sarah and Malcolm five years ago. That something forced them to leave Charlotte. That something is just now being resolved and Max has to be in court to make sure that it is really over.”
Oh My God.
“He said that he had to go, but I didn’t think he literally meant he was forced to go. I didn’t let him tell me what happened. I didn’t even ask about his dad or Sarah.”
Grinning like a loon, she clapped. “So he was over here last night!” I must have looked like a deer caught in the headlights because she doubled over laughing. “You are so fucking busted, girlfriend. Spill it! Especially after you made me tell you about the trial!”
“Every bit of this conversation stays between us, yes?”
“Totally,” she agreed, “I don’t want both Kurt and Max mad at me.”
I then shared every last detail about my night and morning with Max. When I was through she asked, “Was it everything you’d hoped for?”
“Yes, but I was so carried away that I still don’t know what happened to him.”
“Explain.”
Letting out a huge sigh of guilt, I explained. “I didn’t know he was leaving again or I wouldn’t have jumped him. I thought we would have time today to talk about everything.”
She pulled me into a hug. “I know you are worried about him not coming back, but Garrett assured us that the chances of Max having to run again are zilch.”
This confused me. “Wait, what does Garrett have to do… with Max?”
She flinched. “Shit.”
“Tell me.”
“You’re the one who was all sassy sexpot last night and here I am trying to do the right thing and not tell you things you should already know. Look, Ellie, can we talk about the wedding please? I’m about to get myself into some serious trouble and I promised someone who I love more than my next breath that I wouldn’t talk to you about it, because it’s not mine to tell.”
I didn’t want to get her in trouble with Kurt so I let her off the hook. I also agreed to take the week off, but that was it. If Max wasn’t back by next Thursday, then that was too bad.
For the rest of the afternoon, we made plans for the engagement party at the bar and talked about dresses. I was worried about talking to Dillon. Apparently he read something into my text that was not there. As screwed up as he and Dana were, I genuinely liked him as a person and hoped that we could be friends, but first I had to tell him about Max.
After Joss left, I cooked dinner and allowed myself to open up to a feeling I hadn’t felt in a very long time…hope.
My phone rang while I was introducing my dad to season one of ‘Sons of Anarchy.’ “Keep watching, dad. I swear it only takes one show to become an addict. This call will take a while and then I’m going to bed.”
“If that’s Max, tell him I have a bone to pick with him when he gets back.”
“Will do,” I replied. Not.
Max and I talked for at least an hour. I wanted to find out about the trial but had promised Joss I wouldn’t say anything. He kept making references to Dillon but, because I wasn’t sure where I stood with him, I tried to avoid that topic. By the end of our conversation I was exhausted. There was so much we should be talking about, but weren’t. We ended the call with a promise to talk and text tomorrow.
A week later and Max still wasn’t back. He had, however, kept his promise about staying in touch. My heart soared every time my phone pinged with his text or rang with his call. He mentioned his businesses in a te
xt and later that night told me about a chain of garages that he had opened all over the south. I was sad that I had missed out on his happiness but proud of his success. We talked about college, my aunt dying, me moving back to Charlotte and reconnecting with my dad. I could tell he was skeptical of my dad and didn’t blame him for being protective. When we were together, my dad was known as that schmuck who had abandoned me and now, he’s…my dad. The only thing that we didn’t talk about was his disappearance and it was starting to wear on me.
Why, why, why didn’t I let him talk to me?
My frustration about what Max wasn’t telling me and stress about talking to Dillon put me in a bad mood. I managed to avoid thinking about the situation with Dillon for the better part of a week, but knew I would have to finally face him and his expectations when I walked into Dragonfly later that night. I also knew that I would have a protective Kurt lingering around all night.
Maybe I should just call in sick….
As if reading my mind, Joss sent me a text asking if I was sure that I didn’t want to take another week off.
Such a great friend…
From the second I walked through the door at Dragonfly, I could sense the tension between Dillon and Kurt.
Pasting a happy smile on my face, I asked, “Hey you two, what’s up?”
“Nothing,” they replied in stereo.
“Ellie B,” Dillon said, pulling me to him and hugging me tightly, “I’ve missed you darlin’.” He kissed my forehead. Then, scanning my face, asked, “How are you doing? I’m sorry you weren’t feeling well last week.”
So that’s what they told him.
Looking at him I realized that he was still beautiful Dillon and I was still….me. Being with Max hadn’t changed the fact that I liked this guy and could see something special in him. What it did do, however, was to clarify in my mind why he wasn’t right for me. Not only was he not Max, he was entirely too wishy-washy. My life with him would be full of indecision and that, I could not live with.
Taking a deep breath, I said, “I’m okay but I need to talk to you before you leave tonight.”