by Nell Stark
The night was warm and clear, with a half moon hanging above them like a pendant. A few people stopped by to chat about the charity, but for the most part, everyone was enjoying the dance floor that had been established amidships. Alix leaned against the railing and looked out over the marina, where dozens of other, less exclusive parties were happening on yachts throughout the harbor. All of Monaco was united in celebration. Formula One might be the epitome of excess, but it did bring people together all across this fractured globe. And if a good cause could benefit as a result, so much the better.
When a cheer rose up from the dance floor, Alix experienced an unfamiliar pang. Usually, she wanted nothing to do with noisy, jostling crowds, but she had no doubt that Thalia would be at its heart. There would be fascination and flirting on the part of her fans, and some of them might even attempt to take other liberties. How did Thalia feel about that, now? They had yet to discuss anything like exclusivity, and was it even part of the equation in a relationship with no strings attached? Was Thalia thinking of her at all, or was she simply enjoying the moment?
“You look deep in thought, Your Serene Highness.”
And just like that, Alix had her answer. She whirled to find Thalia standing before the table with a grin on her face that grew broader when she saw Alix’s expression.
“What are you doing here?” Alix blurted.
“Oh?” Thalia raised an eyebrow. “Would you rather I go back to the bumping and grinding?” She jerked her finger in the direction of the dance floor.
“No!” The syllable came out rather more forcefully than Alix had intended. She tried to compose herself. “It’s just that I didn’t…that is, I—”
“You didn’t expect me to want to be here when I could be there.” Thalia braced her arms on the table. They both knew she couldn’t come any closer in public.
“Perhaps.” But as Thalia stood looking at her, she knew she had to own the truth. “Yes. I’m sorry.”
“I do enjoy dancing,” Thalia said softly. “But it wasn’t much fun without you.”
The declaration made her feel warm inside. “Though your toes are probably safer.”
Thalia laughed. “The bruises were a small price to pay.”
A couple passed by, then—a footballer and his model girlfriend—and paused to congratulate Thalia. Once they had gone, she turned back to Alix and moved closer, picking up one of the brochures.
“I want you to come back to my hotel room,” she said, her voice soft and intense. “And this time, I don’t want any rules about touching.”
Alix felt her heart stutter, then begin to pound. Thalia was giving her a choice, but it was one she realized she had already made. “Yes.”
“It’s what you want?”
Alix moistened her dry lips and nodded. She felt a little dizzy. “Yes. It’s what I want.”
“I wish we could go now,” Thalia said, and the forlorn note in her voice dissolved the mounting intensity between them, allowing Alix to smile.
“Me too,” she said. “But we’re both stuck here, aren’t we?”
“Maybe by midnight, everyone will be too drunk to notice if we slip away.”
“It’s worth a try,” Alix said. They were going to slip away. They were going to slip away and return to Thalia’s hotel room and have sex. “Make love,” as Thalia liked to call it. Anticipation rose like a storm, gusty and tinged with fire.
“I’m not going to drink anything else for the rest of the night,” Thalia said. “I want to remember everything.”
“Oh.” Alix didn’t know what else to say. That Thalia, who unapologetically loved her liquor, would restrain herself on the night of her first podium finish ever out of a desire to have the most vivid possible experience later meant that she regarded what would happen tonight as more meaningful than her usual encounters.
A rowdy group of partygoers interrupted the moment, and Thalia took a step back. “I’ll see you later,” she murmured before slipping away in the opposite direction.
Alix prepared herself for the unfamiliar experience of being recognized—she had been up on stage earlier tonight, after all—but the group was already inebriated enough not to notice her. They passed her by, leaving her alone on the deck, counting the hours until midnight.
Chapter Seventeen
Alix followed Thalia into her hotel room, clutching her hand tightly. Moonlight streamed through the windows, illuminating the chair from which she had dared to touch Thalia so intimately last night. But that had been a massage in preparation for the race. This…this was a celebration, and anything could happen.
Thalia turned as if she had heard the thought, and cupped Alix’s face in her hands before kissing her gently. “Nothing will happen tonight that you don’t want,” she murmured.
“I want you to kiss me again,” Alix said, because it was the truth.
Thalia obliged, and this kiss was an inferno. Lost in the heat of her mouth, Alix didn’t realize she had closed her eyes until they flashed open when the backs of her legs hit the bed. Thalia stared down at her, hands on her hips squeezing rhythmically, her face a study in need.
“I want to make love with you more than I’ve ever wanted anything,” she said hoarsely. “Including that trophy.”
“I believe you,” Alix whispered, because she couldn’t fill her lungs enough to speak normally.
Thalia released her and took a step back. Without her support, Alix’s knees buckled and she sat down hard on the bed. Her stomach somersaulted as she realized that she might have just sabotaged the entire evening. If she had simply kissed Thalia instead of giving in to her insecurities, they would be undressing each other right now instead of having a face-off.
“That’s the second time you’ve said that without meaning it.” Thalia’s arms were crossed over her chest and her tone was accusatory.
“I preferred your response the first time,” Alix said, remembering how Thalia had shut her up by kissing her beneath the setting sun on the deck of the Priceless Pearl.
Her jaw clenched. “There’s nothing I’d like better than to be kissing you right now. But we have to clear the air. I have never lied to you. Not even once. I am not lying when I tell you that I find you attractive, and I am not lying when I tell you how much I want us to make love tonight. Why do you keep assuming I’m not sincere when it comes to you?”
Alix wanted to apologize quickly and get on with what they had been doing. Even now, in the middle of a heated conversation she didn’t want to be having, her desire for Thalia was a drum roll beneath her skin, urging her on. But for whatever reason, Thalia was insistent on having this out. Alix braced both hands on the bed and forced herself to meet Thalia’s gaze.
“I’m well aware that I’m not as attractive as most of the women you’ve been with. When I compare myself with them, I fall short. And then I fall into the trap of questioning whether you’re being sincere.”
The more she spoke, the more momentum she built. When Thalia opened her mouth to reply, Alix held up one hand to stave her off. “So when you say that you want to ‘make love,’ I find that confusing. What does that mean to you?”
“Would you rather I tell you that I want to fuck you?” Thalia’s temper was flaring.
“If that’s the truth,” Alix shot back, hoping Thalia hadn’t seen her tremble.
“It is. And it isn’t.” Thalia’s fists clenched. “I want you, Alix. But you’re not some grid girl I just met who wants a one-night stand, or a movie star interested in a quick fling. I would fuck them. It would be fun and meaningless. But I care about you. When I fuck you—if that’s what you want—it will be about more than sex. We have a relationship, you and me. We can’t pretend we don’t.”
Thalia’s answer had neatly skirted around the word “love,” but Alix didn’t mind. She seemed to use “make love” as a synonym for “have meaningful sex,” and that was at once reassuring and frightening. Was she really prepared for this to mean something? For the repercussions of wha
t happened next to extend beyond tonight?
“Alix.” Thalia’s voice, low and intense, mercifully halted her spiraling thoughts. “I want you. I’m going to keep saying it until you believe it. I want to look at you and touch you and taste you. I want to give you so much pleasure. As a doctor, you’re aware of the body’s capacity for sensation. I want you to know it from experience.”
Alix shivered, and this time she could tell that Thalia noticed: she took one eager step forward before reining herself in. The knowledge that she could still exert some self-control, despite the professed magnitude of her desire, was a comfort.
“But I’m not going to come any closer until you tell me what you want. If you’re having second thoughts, that’s fine. I’ll go.”
Sensing an opportunity to change the tone of the conversation, Alix cocked her head. “This is your room.”
Thalia didn’t blink. “I’ll get another.”
“They’re sold out. I heard someone say so in the lobby.” Alix scooted back until she was reclining against the headboard.
“Peter has a suite. I’ll sleep on his couch.”
“I saw the way he was looking at his wife earlier,” Alix said as she arranged the pillows behind her. Thalia’s eyes tracked her every movement. Being the focal point of her attention was exhilarating, and Alix decided to tease her for a little while longer. “And didn’t I see his mother planning to take the baby for the night? I don’t think he’ll appreciate the interruption.”
“What do you suggest, then?”
Alix pretended to stretch and closed her eyes, reclining back against the pillows. “I suppose you’ll just have to stay here with me.”
In the next instant, the mattress dipped, heralding Thalia’s arrival. Alix kept her eyes closed, even as eddies in the air currents announced Thalia’s approach. Alix’s heart pounded against her ribs, but she lay still, wanting to know what Thalia would do next.
Her first touch was a lingering kiss to one corner of Alix’s mouth that became a trail of the same along her jawline and down the column of her neck. By the time she pulled away, Alix’s hips were shifting involuntarily. When she realized how her body was reacting, Alix froze in a paroxysm of shame.
“Hey, now.” Thalia’s whisper was accompanied by a light flick of her tongue to Alix’s earlobe. “Relax. I love the way you move when I’m kissing you.”
No longer content to remain passive, Alix opened her eyes to find Thalia regarding her with a hungry expression. Cupping the nape of her neck, Alix drew her down. Their tongues tangled slowly, almost lazily, belying the urgency Alix felt and, she was now sure, Thalia shared. When she suddenly pulled away, Thalia drew back in alarm, but Alix shook her head and smiled.
“I want you to take off my shirt.”
“Your wish is so absolutely my command,” Thalia said, and began to undo the buttons with an enthusiasm that made Alix laugh.
But her laughter turned to a sharp exhale when Thalia’s knuckles brushed against her breast, igniting a shower of sparks beneath her skin. Thalia paused, and her eyes grew visibly darker.
“Okay?”
“Oh, yes.” Alix hoped she didn’t sound too eager, then realized she shouldn’t care.
Without looking away, Thalia deliberately cupped one breast, rubbing her thumb back and forth along the underside. Even through her bra, it felt absolutely incredible, and Alix couldn’t hold back a low moan.
“That is such a beautiful sound.” When Thalia moved her hand away to undo the remaining buttons, Alix whimpered unintentionally, then cringed and lowered her gaze.
“Don’t you dare be ashamed,” Thalia murmured fiercely. “Look at me, Alix. Look at me.”
Face flaming, Alix raised her eyes, fearing to find humor or even perhaps pity for the poor, inexperienced virgin in Thalia’s expression. Instead, she found nothing but desire and tenderness.
“Don’t hold back with me. Not now, not ever. Your body’s reactions are a kind of communication.” Thalia parted her shirt and eased it down her arms. “I need to know how you’re feeling. So don’t censor yourself. Okay?”
Alix saw an opening to reassert herself and took it. Sitting up against the pillows, she let her shirt pool behind her and reached out for Thalia’s top button. “Only if you promise the same.”
She had briefly seen Thalia topless last night, but now she could savor the experience. Kissing each freshly bared inch of skin, Alix teased Thalia to the best of her ability while divesting her of her shirt and bra. When Alix peeled away the fabric to reveal Thalia’s breasts, she was overwhelmed once again by the desire to cradle them in her palms.
“I want to touch you,” she said, trying not to regret the tremble in her voice.
“Touch me,” Thalia said. “Any way you want.”
Alix cupped one breast, weighing its softness as she fanned her thumb across the taut nipple. When Thalia’s lips parted on a gasp, Alix repeated the motion. She leaned forward to kiss where her fingers had been and dared to indulge her need to taste Thalia’s skin. Soft—her breast was so incredibly soft.
When Thalia gently touched the back of her head, Alix looked up. “Okay?”
“Okay?” Her laugh was strangled. “Please don’t ever stop.”
The confirmation that she was bringing Thalia pleasure inspired Alix to indulge in one of her fantasies. She skimmed her hands along Thalia’s rib cage, holding her in place as she touched the tip of her tongue to the tight knot of Thalia’s nipple. Thalia hissed, one hand tightening on her hair. The pressure of her fingers encouraged Alix to take the nipple into her mouth, where she batted it lightly with her tongue before closing her lips around it and sucking gently. When Thalia quivered beneath her hands, a heady rush of power swept through Alix. Right now, Thalia was holding herself in check as she allowed Alix to explore her, and she wanted to take full advantage. Forcing herself to go slowly, she kissed her way to Thalia’s other breast and repeated her actions.
“You’re driving me crazy,” Thalia finally groaned. “Please, please let me touch you.”
The rush of anticipation prompted Alix to release her. Guiding Thalia’s hands, she silently encouraged her to remove her bra. Thalia kissed her neck as she worked the clasp loose and gently brushed the straps down Alix’s arms. When her torso was bare, Thalia sat back on her heels. Alix balled her hands into fists in an effort not to cover herself as instinct demanded.
“You are so beautiful. I know it’s hard for you to hear that, but it’s the truth.” Thalia cupped her jaw and traced her lips with one thumb. “Let me show you.”
“Yes,” Alix whispered, and lay back against the pillows.
Thalia lowered herself gradually, giving Alix plenty of opportunity to second-guess her decision. But when their breasts touched, Alix felt as though she had found the missing piece to a puzzle decades in the solving. Thalia settled on top of her, elbows framing her face, and kissed her deeply. Grasping Thalia’s shoulders, Alix surged against her, unwilling to play the part of a passive recipient. Their tongues tangled, then battled in a duel of give and take until Thalia raised her head, panting for breath.
“Who taught you to kiss like that?” she gasped.
“You did.” Alix guided Thalia’s mouth to her neck. That may have been a mistake, because Thalia proceeded to torment her—first by covering every inch she could reach with tiny kisses, and then by bringing lips and teeth into play, lightly sucking and nipping until Alix was squirming with need. Desperate with desire, she tugged at Thalia’s hair, urging her lower.
“Oh?” Thalia raised her head, and her smile was smug. “Something you’d like?”
The old Alix, prudish and proper, quailed at speaking the sensual truth. But over the past few months, she had outgrown that version of herself. It was time to discard it—to cast it away like the ill-fitting skin it had become.
“I want…” But the words died on her lips.
Somehow sensing her struggle, Thalia’s expression softened. “It’s okay. Let
me help.” She moved down the bed until her abdomen was pressed between Alix’s thighs, then kissed the center of her sternum. “Am I moving in the right direction?”
“Yes,” Alix whispered.
With kiss after kiss, Thalia proved her claim and fulfilled her promise. When she finally closed her lips around the tip of Alix’s breast, Alix was already transcendent with need. At the first touch of Thalia’s tongue to her nipple, she cried out and surged against her without feeling any self-consciousness at all.
Thalia raised her head, and her eyes were dark pools with only a hint of blue encircling them. “Shhh,” she said. “We’re nowhere near the finish line. Don’t rush it. Just feel.”
Alix was about to retort that that was easy for her to say, when Thalia’s mouth returned to her breast and banished all rational thought. She tried to relax into the exquisite sensations Thalia was eliciting from her body, but every nerve she possessed was drawing tighter and tighter, humming in anticipation. When Thalia dipped her head to nibble at the skin around her navel, Alix shivered as unfamiliar muscles clenched deep inside.
“Thalia,” she said brokenly. “Please. I…I need…”
Thalia looked into her eyes and went very still. “I don’t want to frighten you. I’ve been trying to go so slowly. But all my instincts are screaming at me to get you naked and then make you come with my mouth. If that’s not what you want—not what you need—then you have to tell me right now.”
Alix thought she might spontaneously combust from Thalia’s words alone. “That is what I want. But I need for you to be naked too.”
A sudden burst of adrenaline drove her to sit up and grasp Thalia’s belt buckle. Thalia muttered a curse and looked down at Alix’s hands. Alix fumbled as she slid the leather through its metal cage, but her fingers were steadier as she drew down the fly on Thalia’s slacks. But when she began to push them over Thalia’s hips, Thalia stilled her hands.