by T. L. Hayes
The look on Lou’s face at the blow was awesome.
“Ha!” Rachel cheered in triumph.
Lou took the opportunity afforded by Rachel’s victorious exclamation and struck her in the side. They went on this way for several minutes, Rachel constantly surprising herself each time she got a hit in.
There would be no winner to declare, Rachel suspected, not because she was holding her own, but because Lou was going easy on her. But, no matter. By the time they were done, Rachel felt victorious and she let out another triumphant exclamation.
Lou pulled off her gear and laughed. “Enjoyed that, did you?”
Breathlessly, Rachel bowed and said, “Yes, Sifu, very much.”
“Good.”
“I never expected to be able to hit you.”
“You saw a weakness and you took advantage of it, which is what you’re supposed to do. Besides, you being able to hit me makes me a better fighter.”
“I don’t understand.”
“You just told me what my weaknesses are, so thank you.” Lou bowed to Rachel in her gratitude.
“Oh. Never thought of it that way. You’re welcome, I guess.”
“Okay, I think that’s enough for today.”
“That’s it?” Rachel wasn’t sure about the reason for the short session. Did Lou think she was in a hurry to get back to Bobby? The truth was, she had enjoyed not thinking about him for the first time in days. She loved him beyond anything, but she had been so focused on him for the last several days that her own needs had fallen by the wayside and it was good to focus on something else for a change.
“Yes, we did what you needed to do today.”
“What do you mean?”
Lou looked at Rachel squarely for a moment. “Rachel, what were you thinking about when you hit me?”
“Thinking about? I wasn’t thinking much at all. I was too busy concentrating and trying not to get hit.”
“Okay, let me ask a different question. How did it feel to be able to land a hit?”
“It felt pretty awesome, actually.”
“When you came in today, were you angry?”
“At you? No.”
“Not at me.”
Lou didn’t elaborate and finally Rachel understood and just nodded.
“And now?”
Rachel thought about it for a moment, and then a slow smile crept up. “Not as much. You’re a sneaky wench, aren’t you?”
Lou laughed. “I have my moments. As I said, we did what you needed to do today. Now go shower and then go tell that young man of yours about all the fun he missed out on.”
Rachel was grinning now. “Yes, Sifu.” She bowed, but remembered to stand her ground for Lou to exit first.
Chapter Twenty
Bobby was in the hospital a few more weeks. His doctors wanted to make sure that his recovery, both from his physical injuries and the ones that touched him more deeply, the ones only time and therapy would heal, had progressed enough that he didn’t need constant care.
When he came home, Rachel moved in to take care of him. Chris put up no argument. When Rachel had to leave him to go to class, his mother would come by to make sure he got fed, despite his protests that he had a walking cast and one good arm.
It didn’t take Bobby long to realize that Rachel’s and his mother’s need to take care of him was greater than his actual need to be taken care of, so he stopped protesting and just let it happen. The fact that his mother wanted to be a part of his life again was still hard for him to fully accept, but he knew it was a good step for all that.
His father also came by, sometimes with his mother, sometimes on his own. When he came alone they either sat in the living room and watched TV together or, sometimes, Howard brought a chessboard over, the same one he had taught Bobby to play on when Bobby was still awkwardly wearing dresses and going by a different name.
Father and son didn’t feel the need to discuss anything and Bobby was just grateful for the company and the unspoken acceptance. One day while Bobby was staring at the board, trying to figure out his next move, Howard, who was sitting back in a kitchen chair and looking off into the distance with a small smile on his face, suddenly said, “That girlfriend of yours, she’s something, isn’t she?”
“Stop trying to distract me.” Regardless, Bobby couldn’t help the smile that escaped at the mention of Rachel.
“No, I was just saying—cute, smart, a fighter, loves you. You lucked out. Good job.”
Never taking his eyes off the board, Bobby said, “As much as I appreciate the fact that you approve of my girlfriend, and I do, that isn’t going to stop me from beating you.” Then he moved a knight and captured his father’s king. “Checkmate. Ha!” He looked up and grinned.
Howard studied the board thoughtfully. “Would you look at that? Huh.” He sighed, and then laid his king on its side. “I guess you had to beat your old man eventually.”
Bobby laughed. “Yep. Maybe next time you won’t throw the game.”
Howard looked offended. “Throw the game? You won that fair and square. And it’s about time too.”
“Okay, sure. I’ll pretend you weren’t taking pity on me.”
“Son, I didn’t take pity on you when you were eight. Why would I take pity on you now?”
“Okay, I’ll believe you. And yes, my girlfriend is awesome, thank you for noticing.”
“It’s hard not to. She was by your side every day in the hospital. She kept a smile on her face every time she saw you, no matter how hard that was. She held up well. She loves you very much.”
“I know.”
“Son, I have never tried to tell you how to run your life so I’m not going to start now, but I will say this—if you let that one go, then you’re not as smart as I always thought you were.”
“I have no intention of letting her go.”
“Good. Then don’t screw it up.”
Bobby laughed, but asked, “What do you mean?”
Howard sighed. “You have to be patient with her. Trust me, I’m an expert on that.”
“Yeah, but what do you mean? Patient about what?”
“She’s going to fuss over you for a while and probably treat you a little too delicately. It’s all out of love, but don’t snap at her when she does something for you that you really just want to do for yourself. She almost lost you and she’s still dealing with that. Just give her time to get used to the fact that she didn’t.” Howard started to gather the pieces together and began to put them back in the box.
Bobby sat back in his chair and thought about what his father had said. His father said nothing more as he put the game away. Finally, Bobby said, “I understand. I’ll be patient, I promise.”
Father and son exchanged smiles and nods, and then Howard excused himself, saying he had to be getting home.
His father really knew what was going on in his head. Even though he had been home from the hospital for a few weeks now, Rachel still treated him like he was made of glass. It was one thing, he felt, to be cautious as he maneuvered around the house, but it was another to treat him that way in bed. She slept at his side and let him put his arm around her but she seemed afraid to even hug him. He understood it but he wanted his girlfriend back. Needed her, if truth be known.
That night as Rachel snuggled against him, he felt as if she was just barely there. She was lying on her side with her head on his good arm, her hand casually on his chest, but there was space between them that had never been there before the bashing.
“Rachel, I’m not going to break if you get closer to me, I promise.”
“You’re already broken,” she said sadly.
Very gently he said, “Only on my left side. I want to feel you next to me, touching me.”
“Okay.” She snuggled closer, closing the gap between their bodies, even putting one leg over his like she used to.
“That’s better.”
“Yeah.”
“This is way better than being in the hospital.
At least now I’m not woken up at all hours.”
“Oh, I could still do that if you want.” Rachel raised herself up and grinned evilly at him.
“Only if you’re going to be offering sexual favors. The nurses never did, no matter how often I asked.”
“They didn’t? You need better insurance.”
“Tell me about it.”
The conversation trickled away and Rachel snuggled even closer to him. Bobby nudged her head with his chin and she looked up at him questioningly, but then she seemed to understand.
She scooted her body up enough so that their lips could meet in a soft, slow kiss. She touched his cheek, then reached her hand around until it was behind his head, grabbing his hair. She changed position slightly so that she was practically on top of him and the kiss intensified. His hand found its way under her shirt, and he moaned against her.
She immediately stopped and pulled away. “Are you okay?”
“More than okay. Trust me, that was good. It was very good. I’ve missed you.” He whispered, “Come back here. You were doing just fine.”
“Good to see everything hasn’t changed.”
“Nope. I’m still the same horny teenage boy I was before I went into the hospital. Well, maybe more so now.” He started to rub her back in a slow, sensual way.
“Aww, my poor deprived boy.”
“Uh-huh.”
She reached up and kissed him again, putting her hand under his shirt, then pulled his shirt up. She reached for his nipple, a place she hadn’t ventured before. She looked into his eyes for confirmation that she could touch him there and saw him give her a slow nod. She scrunched down and lifted his shirt more until it was over his chest and she put her mouth to his nipple. She wanted to savor it, savor him. Slowly, she grazed her teeth over it and he groaned and shifted.
“Fuck!”
She chuckled to herself as she continued her work. She moved her right hand over to his other nipple and gave it a squeeze that made him arch his back and sharply inhale. With his free hand he pushed her head more tightly into him and her work on him came faster.
“Oh God, I want to push your hand down to touch me and I can’t. Dammit!”
She pulled her mouth off his nipple long enough to chuckle and say, “I’ll get there, just be patient,” and then she went back to work. She was still delicate with him—she didn’t want to hurt him—but that made their lovemaking all the more tender and sweet.
* * *
As the spring semester progressed, Bobby’s casts came off, and with the help of Dr. Lou and a physical therapist his limbs were in proper working order again. His boss at the restaurant was nice enough to hold his job for him but Bobby had politely turned him down. Even though both times he had gotten jumped were unrelated to his job, the attacks had happened while he was working, and he still had some anxiety that he wasn’t comfortable talking about yet. Marissa told him that her employer needed a janitor. That work appealed to him for its steady schedule, higher pay, and static location. He began working there in April and quite enjoyed it.
But he missed his singing. Plus, he’d been working on the lyric he had started months before. Even though it had originally started full of angst and anger, he was able to turn it into a positive song about independence. He was anxious for Rachel and his family to hear it. Chris was the only one in his family to have ever seen him perform, and he really wanted his parents to come. He called Al and had his name put on the roster for the next open mic.
On the night of the show, his parents sat at a table with Chris and Marissa, while Rachel sat at another with Dr. Lou. When Bobby took the stage, he looked over and winked at Rachel, who blew him a kiss and gave him a big smile.
As the applause died down, he approached the mic and said, “Thank you, thank you. Oh, it’s good to be back on a stage. I’ve missed this. Did you miss me?”
He gave a cocky grin to the audience and they responded with more applause and a few whistles, one of which was from Rachel.
“Good. I got my parents here tonight, so be nice to me.” The audience chuckled. “I also have the best girlfriend a guy could ever have. She supports me in everything I do and she was great at nursing me back to health. I would be remiss if I did not sing this first song for her.”
He nodded to Rachel, and then the band started to play a soulful tune and he began to sing Kelly Clarkson’s “Thankful.” He closed his eyes through the more bluesy parts, with his hand to his chest, and swayed with the music. He made sure to make eye contact with Rachel again at the end and looked only at her as he finished the song.
The cheer that rose up when he finished was almost deafening. This time, Rachel didn’t whistle or holler out—she seemed to be busy wiping her eyes. Dr. Lou did the whistling for her though, and Bobby, mic in hand, bowed to her from stage as he would have during training. With a wink and a smile, Dr. Lou returned the bow.
“Thank you all. Now for my next trick…I’m going to do something of my own. I hope you like it.” He then went into his song, which he had entitled “It’s About Me,” a song about the push-pull relationship he’d been having with his mother. But in a larger sense, the song was about how sometimes parents just need to let their children go live their own life.
The lines he felt closest to were the repeated refrain, “It’s about me, not about you, so shut your mouth and let me be.” He had worried, at first, that it might sound a bit harsh and make his mother upset, which he really didn’t want to do, considering how precarious their relationship was at the moment, but he had really written it for her and he wanted her to hear it. Needed her to hear it.
When the song was over and Bobby left the stage, his mother got up and went to him and said with tears in her eyes, “Letting you go is the hardest thing, so don’t ask me to do that. But I will let you be. I’ll let you be you. Oh…” She couldn’t talk anymore, so she just threw her arms around his neck and hugged him.
Next, it was his father’s turn. “I’m proud of you, son. That was pretty damn good.”
Chris added, “Do you have to be the pretty one and the talented one?”
“But you’re the…wait, which one are you again?” Bobby grinned.
“I’m the one who’s going to raise your rent.”
“Oh, the asshole, now I remember.”
“We can share the title.”
Lou leaned closer to Rachel and said, “Seems like a strange ritual they have.”
Rachel looked incredulously at Lou. “Says the woman who called me a fool in Chinese.”
Lou blushed. “Did I lie?”
“Beside the point.”
“Never mind me, go congratulate that boy.”
“Good idea.” Rachel put her hand on Bobby’s arm in order to get his attention away from his brother. “Excuse me, it’s my turn.” She put her arms around him and kissed him, though chastely, as his parents were watching. “That was awesome and I love you.”
“Thank you and I love you too.” He pulled her to him for a long hug and whispered in her ear, “Thank you, just thank you.”
She squeezed him and buried her face in his chest, taking in his scent. Rachel sighed and stood there holding him, not caring about the others around them, just grateful.
Chapter Twenty-one
In June, Rachel and Bobby went to Minnesota for Rory and Maggie’s wedding, which the university had agreed to let them hold in the theater. Rory walked down the left aisle and Maggie the right, and then they came together in the middle and mounted the steps that had been placed there for that purpose. Rachel and Bill waited onstage to stand in attendance. All the members of the wedding party wore suits designed by Bill, so of course, they were fabulous.
Rachel wasn’t used to wearing a suit and didn’t feel totally comfortable in it, but Bobby told her repeatedly before the ceremony that she looked gorgeous. And she had to admit, Rory was beautiful and handsome at the same time. The silver suit shimmered on her and she looked like she was made for the suit, r
ather than the other way around.
Before the ceremony she and Rory were alone backstage.
“Wow, Morgan, you should wear these things more often. I say this without lust for once but damn, girl, you are fine!” She grinned.
Rory instantly blushed and began to straighten her already straight tie. “You think?”
“Oh, honey, if you had worn a suit a year ago things would have turned out way different for everyone.”
“You say that as if you would have had a chance with me.” Rory looked into the dressing room mirror and began to make little adjustments to her suit and her hair that didn’t need to be made. Rachel went up to her, turned her to face her, and grabbed her hands.
“Stop that, you’re already perfect. Maggie’s going to melt when she sees you.”
“Yeah?” Rory asked nervously.
“Yes.”
“What about me? When I see her, I don’t know if I’ll be able to walk or remember what I’m supposed to say.”
“Morgan, listen to me and stop freaking out.” Rachel put her hands on Rory’s shoulders and looked her in the eye. Rory returned the look, but her gaze was unsteady. “First of all, calm down. This is nothing. This will all be over in a few minutes, and then we get to the party. And you just have to stand there and look gorgeous and tell that woman you love her. If you forget your vows, just tell her that. That’s all that matters. And if it helps, think of this as the best show you’ve ever done.” She lightly slapped Rory on the cheek a couple of times and Rory smiled.
“I don’t need any help with having rosy cheeks, thanks anyway. But you’re right, nothing to it. People get married every day.”
Rory took a deep breath and seemed to compose herself, but then she looked panicked again. She grabbed both of Rachel’s arms. “Rachel, what if I’m not good at it?”
“Not good at what?”
“At being married? What if I can’t adult? What if…what if I fail her?”
“Morgan, snap out of it. Don’t make me smack you for real because I will. All I know about adulting is you have to do it whether you know what you’re doing or not. You’re going to get through it regardless. And you’re not going to fail her. Now tie straight, boots on, and sally forth! The curtain is about to go up.” Rachel had given Rory a similar pep talk the night their last show opened because Rory had been nervous that her voice would fail her.