Another collective gasp rose from the residents and grew to a din of excitement. They spoke Creole too quickly for Kate to decipher exactly what was being said, but from the looks on their faces, she knew they were thankful for the hope they had just received.
“Thank you.” It was all she could do to refrain from jumping into the man’s arms and hugging him. “This means the world to everyone here. If the recommendation is accepted, you’ll be changing the lives of all of these people. But you already know that. I can’t thank you enough. And, Mr. Hernandez, thank you for coming out today. If I can do anything to help, please let me know.” Kate’s excitement gave her a bad case of motormouth. Sage squeezed her shoulder, and it was enough to pull her back down to earth.
“We’ll be in touch,” Mr. Dawson said.
They watched the men climb into their truck and drive back toward town. Once the truck was out of sight, Kate let out a loud breath. “Oh my God. I think we did it.”
Before she had taken two steps, Adela embraced her. Her mother, Indira, was on her heels, pulling Kate against her plump bosom.
“Thank you,” Indira said.
“It’s a miracle,” Adela said to the other women. She eyed Kate, and Kate knew she had slowed her speech, instead of rattling off her excitement in Creole, so she would understand.
They passed Kate from one resident to the next, and for the next ten minutes Kate was embraced by everyone in the crowd. Some whispered a quick prayer; others expressed their gratitude. Tears pressed at Kate’s eyes over what her hard work had accomplished and at the thankfulness of the people.
As they walked away from the village and headed back toward town, the magnitude of what she’d accomplished coalesced with Sage professing his love for her and sharing his thoughts about the nonprofit. Until now, graduating college and committing to AIA topped Kate’s Things I’m Proud Of list. They didn’t compare to knowing her determination and hard work helped Punta Palacia be considered for a community well. As she walked hand in hand with Sage, she realized that she had completely misjudged him from day one, and she knew that one day she’d be adding Building a Future with Sage to that list, too.
Chapter Twenty-Four
SAGE HAD TWO things on his mind as he came around the side of the cabins. Celebrating Kate’s achievement with her and finding Clayton and Cassidy. They’d made a promise to Kate and hadn’t thought enough of her to follow through. The fact that she didn’t end up needing their support didn’t matter. A promise was a promise, and he’d be damned if he let Clayton dismiss Kate in that way.
He found them loading their luggage into an all-terrain vehicle. Clayton was dressed in a pair of distressed jeans and a white button-down shirt. Cassidy wore a very tight, short red dress.
“Hey, Sage, we’re taking off,” Clayton said, as if he hadn’t just blown off Kate.
“Taking off?” Sage eyed Cassidy as she applied a fresh coat of red lipstick.
“Yeah, my agent called. I’ve got a gig lined up Monday, and he wants me well rested. Can’t be jet-lagged when I’m performing.”
“Clayton, did you forget about the meeting in the village today?” Sage was getting a clear understanding of what Kate had been dealing with for two years.
“Nah. Didn’t forget. I canceled the photog after I got the call. No worries. It was all taken care of.” He turned to Cassidy. “Come on, Cass. We’d better go if we’re gonna make our flight.” He reached out a hand to Sage. “Great to hang out with you, man. We’ll have to catch up sometime in the Big Apple.”
Sage stared at his hand. “Did it occur to you that maybe Kate was counting on your support at that meeting? You knew how important it was to her.”
“Dude, the press didn’t come. What does it matter? I wasn’t about to go stand in the heat for something I don’t give a damn about.” Cassidy slid into the backseat, and Clayton closed the door behind her and walked around the car to the other side.
Sage clenched his fists, wanting to slam Clayton’s disrespectful ass against the car and show him just how much Kate mattered and just how much he should care about the people of Punta Palacia. He narrowed his eyes. “I thought your little act the other night was too good to be true.”
“The songs? Hell.” He nodded toward the car. “Cassidy gets hot when I sing to her.” He shrugged.
“You don’t give a shit that you let Kate down.” I’ll make you give a shit. He closed the gap between them, his muscles twitching as he restrained himself from pounding the shit out of him, trying to ignore the devil on his shoulder that was making him see himself in Clayton for dismissing Kate when he’d been lost in his drawing—and that troublesome nag fueled his anger.
Clayton laughed. “Dude, it’s not like I slept with her. Hell, even if I had, what would it matter?”
Sage grabbed him by the collar and slammed him against the car.
“Jesus.” Clayton’s eyes narrowed, filling with anger. “Haven’t you ever let anyone down before? It’s a fucking way of life for me, man. I let everyone down. Nothing personal about Kate.”
Sage stared into Clayton’s cold eyes, breathing loud and hard. Haven’t you ever let anyone down before? It’s a fucking way of life for me, man. It would be so easy to finish this. To take revenge for him letting Kate down and for the comment he’d made about her. But the rage that boiled in Sage’s blood turned on him. Sage realized that he, too, had let Kate down. The night he’d been lost in his art, he’d done exactly what Clayton and Cassidy were doing. He’d chosen something else instead of keeping his promise. He’d let her down. He released Clayton and stepped back. Clayton stumbled a few steps before righting himself and turning angry eyes on Sage.
“What the hell? Priorities, man. What do I get for my efforts? That’s what it’s all about.”
Sage took a halfhearted step in his direction, his muscles burning, sweat beading on his arms.
Clayton scrambled into the car and slammed the door. The car kicked up dirt as it sped away.
Goddamn it. What type of hypocrite am I? Kate might have forgiven him, and she might have said that she’d help him through the next time he forgot, but what the hell did that say about him? Or about what he felt for her?
The next time? What the hell? Sage had seen the hurt in Kate’s eyes the morning he’d gone to apologize, and though she’d been too sidetracked this afternoon to say much about Clayton and Cassidy not showing up, he knew that somewhere in that beautiful head of hers she was linking their absence with what he’d done to her, even if she didn’t realize it.
Well, hell. He had no right to give Clayton shit if he didn’t give himself hell for doing the same thing. He’d excused himself for being oblivious to the time and to Kate waiting to see him. Excused himself! It made him sick to think that he was that type of man. A man like Clayton, who put himself before others. Kate was too good of a person to have to deal with a man who got too sidetracked to care enough to be there for her when he said he would. I need to fix this.
I’m not sure I can.
I’ve been this way my whole life.
Kate’s words resonated with him. See the need. Find a way. Fill the need. Sage’s cell phone vibrated with a text from Jack. He had to prove to himself that he could change. Good intentions went only so far.
Sage dialed Jack’s number. “Jack, it’s me.”
“I just texted you. Did you get the stuff Craig sent?”
“Yeah, thanks for that. Actually, Craig was more than helpful. I really appreciate you calling him for me.”
“Sure. That’s what family’s for. Why do you sound like you want to kill me?”
“I’ve just got some shit going on. Listen, I need some more help, and this time I’m kind of at a loss. I have no idea who to turn to.”
“What’s up?” Jack’s voice turned serious. Sage pictured him standing with his legs planted hip distance apart, his eyes narrowed and dark, his biceps clenching in that nervous way they did.
“You know how I kinda tune eve
ryone out when I’m working?”
Jack laughed. “Shit. That’s the understatement of the year. You’ve done that since you were little. I remember coming home for Christmas when you were five or six. You were so lost in your finger paints, I asked Mom if you’d gone deaf. You had me worried.”
“Yeah, well, nothing has changed, and it’s not a good thing. I gotta figure out how to fix that.”
“Kate giving you shit?” Jack asked.
“No. I’m giving myself shit. I was thinking that I might talk to a therapist or something to get some ideas. Didn’t you talk to a therapist after Linda died?” Sage cringed. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to blurt that out.”
“That’s okay. The only one who really got through to me was Mom, if you can believe that. Well, and Savannah, but it was Mom’s advice that hit home.” Jack sighed. “So you want to conquer your other world. I wondered if—or should I say when—this would become an issue.”
“You make me sound like a fucking alien.”
“You kind of are. But then again, aren’t all artists?” Jack laughed.
“So lay it on the line, Jack. What’s wrong with me? I always wrote it off as just who I am.”
“No shit. We all did.”
“I’ve lost girlfriends over it for years. I’ve heard it all. I’m self-absorbed, selfish; I don’t care about them.” He sighed. “The thing is, I’ve tried to change, but when I’m working, I’m really focused, and now I need to change. Kate deserves more than some lame excuse about my inability to pull myself out of my work.”
“You know, I thought I had tried to change before I met Savannah, too. Bro, do you really think you’ve tried to change?” Jack’s words held a sarcastic note that took him by surprise and annoyed him.
“Of course. No one wants to be told they suck as a boyfriend.”
“There is that, yes. Here’s the thing, and don’t get pissed at me for saying it. I’m not sure you really tried to change. Changing something you’ve been doing your whole life isn’t something someone can make you do. You have to want to change.”
Sage rolled his eyes. “I did try to change. Do you think I like having to grovel?” It fucking sucks.
“No, I don’t think you like it. I think you just liked what you were doing more than you liked who was waiting for you.”
“Well, that doesn’t take a rocket scientist.”
“I told you not to get pissed. It’d be easier for me to hang up than spend my time walking you through this shit.”
“I’m sorry. I’m just frustrated.” He stood and paced, his shoulder muscles tight, pressing the phone tightly against his ear. “I don’t want to be the guy who makes excuses. I don’t want to look into Kate’s trusting eyes and know I made her feel unimportant. Isn’t there anything that you can tell me that will help?”
Jack’s voice grew serious…and cold. “You’ll figure it out.”
“That’s it? I’ll figure it out? What the hell, Jack?” I’m screwed. He looked toward the path that led to Kate’s hut. Kate’s screwed.
“You’ve already done more than you ever have in the way of trying. You recognize the issue. You picked up the phone and called me. You’ll figure this out. It just has to mean enough to you for you to do so.”
“That doesn’t help. Do you have a therapist’s number or a book I can read that might help?”
“This change has to come from within. Listen, I gotta go meet Savannah, and I hate to cut you off, but, dude, trust me. Nothing I say will make you change. You gotta want it more than you want your next breath. If your gut doesn’t ache over it, it ain’t gonna happen.” Jack paused for a second.
Sage stared at his cell phone, wondering what the hell he was supposed to do next.
“We cool?” Jack asked.
“Yeah.” He didn’t know if he should thank Jack or yell at him. This change has to come from within. No shit. “Love ya, man. I’ll see you when I get back.”
“Love you too. And, Sage, you know if I can pull my head out of my ass, you can.”
He sure as hell hoped so. Sage ended the call, whipped off his shirt, and threw his phone on his bed. Then he walked back outside to torture himself with sit-ups and push-ups. See the need. Find a way. Fill the need. Sage saw the need to fix his inability to come out of the depths of his work. Now it was time to square this shit away.
KATE PACED THE floor of her small room. Excitement and fear competed within her, sending the butterflies in her stomach into a wrestling match. She’d thought a cold shower would ease her nerves, but even after she was freshly showered and dressed in a pair of khaki shorts and a blue cotton tank top, her insides were still caught up in a whirlwind. She flopped onto the bed, then sprang to her feet and paced again. She’d been playing her conversation with Sage over and over in her mind. She loved being with him. Adored him! But Kate was used to knowing where she was headed, what the future held, even if for only two years at a time. For the first time in her life she felt stuck. What would it mean to be involved with a company with Sage? How could they see how their relationship was going to work if she was living with her parents? She couldn’t get an apartment—what if they didn’t work out and her only option was to go back into AIA or a similar organization? She couldn’t be committed to a twelve-month lease.
A month-to-month lease?
She contemplated the option. In New York? How would she afford it? Would she be a volunteer? Would she earn an income? She had so many unanswered questions, and the only thing she was sure of was that she wanted to be with Sage. But she didn’t want to assume she’d live with him. Hell, she didn’t even know if she’d want to live with him.
She glanced at their mattresses in the screened-in area.
I want to live with him.
It was crazy. How could she want that after two weeks? What would her parents think? Oh my God. What will they think if I leave AIA? How can I leave AIA? There were too many loose ends, and what if Sage was just blowing smoke? He’s not a blow smoke type of guy. He gets shit done.
What if working together is too stressful? It occurred to her that maybe he didn’t mean they’d work together. He was an artist. So would she and the other employees travel and she’d see him when she wasn’t traveling? Ugh! There were too many unanswered questions. This was all too much. She couldn’t plan a single thing without knowing the answers, but she didn’t want to push Sage, either.
I’m not asking you to run off and marry me. I’m saying that I want this relationship. I want to see where it goes. What does that mean? She was right back to not knowing how they could have a relationship without being in the same city. Could she get a temporary job in someplace like New York? What would she do? Work in a soup kitchen? Work for another nonprofit? The idea of living in New York made her nervous. She needed air.
Kate opened the screened door and stepped outside, taking a long, deep breath.
“Feeling confined?” Sage came up the path with a handful of freshly picked flowers and floppy green leaves in one hand and a bag in the other.
She ran down the steps to him and jumped into his arms. He caught her between his forearms, and she lowered her lips to his. Better. So much better. She drew back, feeling like new air had been breathed into her lungs. Calmer air. “Sorry.”
“I’m not.” He kissed her again. “Will I get one of those kisses every time we get a semi-approval for a well? Because if the answer’s yes, the business model just got put into overdrive.”
She slid from his arms back down to the ground. “I just needed that.”
“I figured you were here mulling things over and driving yourself crazy.”
“Really? You figured that?” How could you possibly know?
He arched a brow. “You’re the most organized person I know. The stuff I said today must have sent your brain into a tizzy. There are no lists, no places for checkmarks, no organization of any kind.”
“Okay, so maybe you know me a little.”
He pressed his hips
to hers. “A little?”
“Maybe a lot. But there are things you don’t know about me. Maybe I’m okay with not knowing what comes next.” And maybe pigs really do fly.
“Uh-huh.” He held out the flowers. “I was proud of you today.”
“Thank you. They’re beautiful.” They went upstairs into her room, and she filled a glass with water and set the flowers in them. She nibbled on her lower lip. She couldn’t ask him about everything now. He’d feel rushed, pushed, overwhelmed. I’m going to lose my mind.
“Okay, where do you want me?” He looked around the room.
“What do you mean?”
Sage stood with a bag in his hand and a smile on his face. “We should talk. Do you want to go grab a beer and talk at the mess hall? Sit outside? If we stay in here, I’m not gonna talk. I can tell you that right now. You look too sexy with your eyebrows all pushed together and your eyes darting all over the room like you can’t figure out what to focus on.” He put his hands on her hips. “It makes me want to…” He kissed her.
Kiss me again. That makes me feel so much better.
“Love the nervousness out of you.” He kissed her again.
Oh God, yes.
His hand traveled down her hip and squeezed. Kate’s body melted against him as he deepened the kiss.
He pressed his cheek to hers and whispered, “I want to touch you until you can’t remember what you were worried about.”
“Yes,” she said in one long, heavy breath. That was the one thing she was sure of. All the questions about the job and her living arrangements could wait.
He pulled back, and Kate forced her eyes open. She reached for him, and he took a step backward.
“Sorry,” he said in a low, sexy voice that made her want to climb him like a tree and devour him. He reached for the door. “We have work to do.”
Kate watched him walk out the door and stifled her frustration. She forced her rubbery legs to follow him out the door, where she found him sitting on the step, the bag he was carrying set beside him and a satisfied smirk on his face.
Stroke of Love Page 20