Kara stared up the dangerous goddess, her pulse quickening. “Why not?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” Darkness said, her voice pained. “Because I love you.”
“Rose loves me,” Kara said carefully. “But you’re not Rose, are you?”
The goddess’s face twisted, as if she were in pain. “Stand for me. Please?”
Kara shifted her weight, so that she could rise, gracefully, to her feet. She stood just an inch or so taller than Rose—and therefore, Darkness, as well—and so, she found herself gazing down at the shadowy deity, which felt…uncomfortable.
Because regardless of how similar to Rose the goddess looked, there was still something about her, something that felt…larger, something that compelled Kara to kneel, something that took her breath—and overwhelmed her with awe.
“I’d hoped you’d understand,” Darkness sighed, “that you’d accept me.”
“Accept?” Kara repeated with a frown. What a strange word to use, Kara thought. Accept was such a small word, such an insignificant word. How could she accept a goddess? She could worship a goddess, respect a goddess—but accept?
“You were the only one who ever saw me and accepted me,” the goddess sighed. “Everyone else only cared for the Light in Rose. But you—I thought you were different. I thought you loved me, as well. Not just the Light. But also me.”
Kara stared at Darkness, her brows furrowing, as she tried to understand.
Darkness stepped toward her, and although part of Kara wanted to step back, to cower in fear from this powerful being, she kept her feet planted firmly on the floor. Darkness tilted her face closer to Kara’s, the familiar scent of honey and vanilla filling Kara’s senses. “May I kiss you?” Darkness whispered, pressing her hand to Kara’s cheek. She leaned closer, her lips brushing Kara’s. “Please?”
Kara didn’t know how to respond, as she stared into those horrifying, shadow-filled eyes, as she smelled Rose’s scent all around her. She nodded slowly.
Darkness closed the space between their lips. Her lips felt like velvet, her tongue like ice, her mouth like the embrace of shadows. She kissed Kara with a passion that Kara instantly recognized, and before she even realized what she was doing, Kara was pulling Darkness close and answering that passion with her own.
Cold, gentle shadows swirled around them, as they held each other close, as Darkness took Kara’s face into her hands. Kara felt the shadows dancing over her skin, and she was surprised to find that the sensation felt familiar and pleasant.
It was all familiar—the way Darkness touched her, the way she bit Kara’s lip with her fangs, the way she sucked the drop of blood from Kara’s bottom lip.
Kara knew that passion. She recognized it.
Kara tilted her head back, moaning softly, as Darkness kissed her neck. Her lips felt colder than Rose’s, but just as soft and gentle—and just as hungry.
Darkness tugged at Kara’s tattered shirt, trailing her lips lower, finding the sensitive skin of Kara’s collarbone. She looked up at Kara, as she kissed her, and Kara found herself trapped in the darkness of those black, shadow-filled eyes.
“Rose,” Kara whispered, her brows creasing. “Please, let me talk to her.”
Darkness recoiled, as if she’d been slapped. “I thought you’d realized…”
“I do,” Kara interrupted. She reached out and tucked a lock of shadowy hair behind Darkness’s ear, mesmerized by the way the inky shadows clung to her skin. “I understand, now. That’s why I’m asking—because I know you love me.”
“Of course I do,” Darkness whispered, “but I can’t let you speak to her.”
“I need her,” Kara insisted. “I need…my Rose. All of her. Not just part.”
Darkness stepped closer to her, a sexy smile curling at the corners of her lips—one that looked much too bold for Rose, but still familiar, somehow. “But you don’t,” she argued. “You don’t need her. You only need me. I’ll show you.”
The familiar scent of Rose filled Kara’s senses, again, overwhelming her.
Darkness curled her fingers around the bottom of Kara’s shirt, inky black shadows swirling over the fabric, as she rolled up Kara’s shirt, revealing the lean muscles beneath. She fell to her knees, which left Kara feeling a little disoriented, for a second—both because of the desire flaring up inside her…and that strange compulsion to lower herself before the goddess. It left her feeling a little…inverted.
But also, incredibly turned on. Especially when Rose’s—or Darkness’s—lips met her skin. Kara tilted her head back, sighing out, as the woman she loved traced her tongue over Kara’s stomach. That was the part that had become clear to her—regardless of where Rose ended and Darkness began, the woman in front of her was the person she loved. Or part of the person she loved, at the very least.
Darkness’s shadowy, black gaze shifted up to meet Kara’s. “The passion in Rose? That was me,” she murmured, kissing Kara’s stomach. She tugged at the button of Kara’s leather pants, unfastening them. “I’m the part of her you want.”
Kara grasped her wrists to stop her, holding them tightly. She tilted her head to the side, dark hair spilling over her shoulder. “I do want you,” she said—which caused a relieved smile to spread across the deity’s face. “Because…I want all of her.” She pulled at Darkness’s wrists, pulling her to her feet. “I always have.”
Darkness stared at her, confusion twisting at her face. “Have me…then.”
Kara shook her head. “No. I love all of Rose. I want—I need—all of her.”
Darkness suddenly stepped back, shadows swirling around her body, like a whirlwind of darkness. “You don’t understand. I’m sorry, Kara, but…I can’t.”
“I do understand,” Kara said boldly. “You know Rose would stop you.”
“Would she?” Darkness challenged. “Would she save this world? After all it’s taken from her? Whose pain do you think created this storm, Kara? I may not be the Rose you love, but I’m still part of her. I have always been part of her.”
Kara stared into the black, pain-filled eyes of the woman she loved, and she sighed, “You’re wrong.” She tilted her head to the side, silky, blue and black hair falling over her shoulder. “You’ve always been wrong.” A gentle smile curved at the corners of Kara’s mouth. “Even as Rose, you were wrong about that.”
A puzzled frown twisted at the deity’s brows. “I was wrong about what?”
“You—Rose,” Kara said, “you’ve always believed no one would love this part of you, but I do. I have always loved all of Rose—the Light and Darkness.”
The shadows seemed to freeze, all of the sudden, hovering around them.
The creature’s black gaze shifted away. Despite her terrifying appearance, she looked more like Rose than ever—so sad, so unsure of herself. “You have?”
“Of course,” Kara breathed. She stepped closer to her. “The things I said before—I didn’t understand what you were. I was wrong. I blamed you for Rose’s absence. But now, I get it. You are Rose. But I need the other parts of her, too.”
Darkness stepped back, conflicted. “I can’t bring her back. She gave up.”
“There must be a way,” Kara pleaded. Lightning struck outside, and light briefly filled the building. “You’re a goddess. The Goddess. You can do anything.”
Darkness laughed softly at that. “Not anything. I can’t force her out. She has to choose to come out on her own,” she told her, “and she doesn’t want to.”
Kara sighed, as another wave of sadness poured through her. She shook her head. “Rose wouldn’t want this,” she said tiredly. “You know she wouldn’t.”
“Rose makes mistakes,” Darkness scoffed. “She is weakened by Light.”
“Rose isn’t weak,” Kara said. “She’s the strongest person I’ve ever met.”
Darkness frowned. “You only say that because you think it’ll stop me.”
Kara laughed in disbelief. “Is that what you think?” she scoffed. “I�
�m not the hero. I never have been. That was Rose. I’m not here to save the world, love.”
“Then,” Darkness breathed, her frown deepening, “why did you come?”
Kara traced the softness of Rose’s cheek with her thumb. “For Rose.”
Darkness covered Kara’s hand with her own, interlacing her fingers with Kara’s. “Do you understand what I am? Do you understand why I must do this?”
“You’re a goddess,” Kara assumed, “but you’re also Rose—part of her.”
“Rose has existed for twenty-four years,” Darkness said. “I have existed since the beginning. I am Pain. I know Light’s shortcomings more than anyone.”
Kara watched her closely. “What do you mean? Her shortcomings?”
“The mistakes that Light made,” Darkness told her. “Everyone assumes I’m the evil one, but I’m not the one who created this world. I’m not the one who allows people to suffer. That’s Light. She’s the one who always does what’s fair.”
Kara squinted curiously. “You’re saying you don’t believe fair is good?”
“Do you?” Darkness asked. She stepped back, letting go of Kara’s hand. “People always think justice is good,” she said, “until justice looks like cruelty.”
“Mercy isn’t fair,” Kara realized, blinking. “You’re the merciful one.”
“Light doesn’t care about your pain,” Darkness growled. “She only cares about balance. She only cares about the rules. But I care. I hear every cry of pain, every plea for mercy, every call for vengeance.” She stepped closer, her dark eyes dancing with emotion. She lifted her shadowy hands and touched Kara’s face. “I was there,” she whispered, “that night. When Hadleigh died. I felt your pain. Your grief.” She paused, watching as pain flashed in Kara’s ice-blue eyes. “I heard your pleas. I led you to the warrior who killed your lover. I gave you your vengeance.”
A quick, sharp breath escaped Kara’s mouth, as the information whirled in Kara’s mind—throwing everything she thought she knew into chaos. “You feel everyone’s pain?” she breathed. “Everyone who has ever existed? For all of time?”
“Since Light created them,” Darkness confirmed. She said it simply, as if it were a mere fact, rather than something that was confusing—and terrible. That reminded Kara of Rose more than anything Darkness had done so far—because that was exactly the way Rose was. Always minimizing her own pain—disguising it behind facts. “Everyone’s pain. Yours. Alana’s. Erik’s. Kallias’s. I’ve felt it all.”
“It makes sense, then,” Kara sighed, “that you’d want to end the world.”
A relieved smile spread across the deity’s face. “You understand, then?”
“I do,” Kara told her. “You want to spare everyone. The world is ending, either way, and after feeling all the pain this world has caused, you think it should.”
Darkness nodded. “No one has to suffer anymore. I can erase all of it.”
“But do you know what Rose understands,” Kara asked, “that you don’t? She understands that there’s more to this world than pain.” She stepped forward. “Rose believes that the good that does exist in this world…is worth fighting for.”
“Rose is wrong,” Darkness said. “She’s blinded by the Light inside her.”
“She’d fight,” Kara said. “You know she would. If she were in control…”
“But she’s not in control,” Darkness interrupted. Her words exuded so much power that the ground itself shook, knocking Kara off of her feet. Shadows swirled between them, keeping Kara on the ground. “I am in control now, and I will right every wrong that Light has committed. I can create a better world.”
Kara barely reacted to being knocked off her feet or the shifting ground beneath her. She scrambled to her knees—arguing with the goddess, as if nothing had happened. “You know Rose wouldn’t want this. You know she’d stop you!”
“Why would she?” Darkness challenged. The shadows within her eyes grew darker, denser, like a black hole that sucked everything into it and destroyed all that it touched. “When she doesn’t even want to live in this world anymore?”
The ferocity in Kara faded as quickly as it had appeared. She settled back on her legs, nodding sadly. “She doesn’t want to live in a world without Kallias.”
“So, I’ll destroy it for her,” Darkness said. “These people are all in pain. They beg me for mercy every day. I’m ending their pain. It’s a mercy killing, really.”
Kara frowned, recognizing those words—the words that Logan had said to Rose before he tried to kill her, the ones he must’ve seen in his vision. “You’re just giving people what they’ve asked for,” she realized. “An end to their pain.”
“Light would never do it,” Darkness said. “Rose has too much Light.”
Kara climbed unsteadily to her feet. And even though the shadows still surrounded her, they didn’t stop her, when she stepped closer to Darkness. “You said you’re Pain, right?” she said softly. She took Darkness’s hand—Rose’s hand—and placed it against her chest. “Do you feel mine? Do you feel what I feel now?”
Darkness breathed out a soft sigh. “Of course. I always feel you, Kara.”
Kara leaned closer, touching her forehead to Rose’s. “Do you know what caused this pain?” she whispered. “Do you know why I’m hurting right now?”
Tears, laced with shadows, streamed down Darkness’s cheeks. “Rose.”
“I miss her,” Kara said. “I love her more than anything in this world.”
“I don’t want you to feel this pain,” Darkness whispered. “I love you.”
“Then, let me speak to her,” Kara begged. “Please. Let me see my love.”
—
“Rose, I know you’re in pain right now, but you’re running out of time.”
Rose lifted her face from her knees, her skin reddened from tears. “How are you here?” she asked Alana. She leaned against an intangible wall with her arms wrapped around her legs. “I don’t even know what’s real and what isn’t anymore.”
Alana sat down next to her, her shoulder touching Rose’s. “I’m real,” she told Rose. She smiled sweetly, as Rose gave her a skeptical look. “I’m also dead.”
Rose rolled her eyes, tired of the mind games. “Then, how are you here?”
“Do you even know where here is, love?” Alana asked. When Rose sighed in defeat, Alana’s smile deepened. “I didn’t think so. Do you know what you are?”
Rose sighed, “Are you just here to make me feel like an idiot? Because…”
“No, darling,” Alana cooed. “Making people feel like idiots is your job.”
“I don’t mean for them to feel like idiots,” Rose said. “I just like sarcasm.”
Alana giggled at that. “In death, I’ve become a bit more…generous,” she told Rose. “So, I’ll do you a favor and tell you the truth. The reason you can come here, the reason you can see me,” she whispered to her, “is that you…are Death.”
Rose frowned at her strange word-choice. “I’m dead?”
“No,” Alana said, rolling her eyes. “Death. Keep up, darling.”
Rose glanced around at her surroundings—a dark, shapeless hole, much like the one she visited in her nightmares. “I don’t understand. How am I Death?”
“You’re a goddess, love,” Alana said impatiently. She tilted her head, her pale blonde hair falling to one side, as she angled an amused look at Rose. “How can someone who is so…in their head, all the time, be so unaware of themselves?”
“Uhh,” Rose said with a frown, “it’s…too messy in my head? I guess?”
Alana giggled. “As someone who’s been in your head, I have to agree.”
Rose didn’t laugh. “Alana, I’m not in the mood for games right now.”
“Of course not,” Alana said. “Because you’re grieving—for Kallias.” She smiled, as Rose started to cry. “Would you like to see him? Of course you would.”
Rose wiped her hand beneath her eye. “That’s not f
unny,” she snapped, her voice cracking from the sadness and anger. She frowned, as Alana climbed to her feet. “It’s not.” But Alana simply dusted off her dress—and then vanished.
Rose blinked in shock. Then, as she realized it must’ve been a nightmare, after all, she laid her head down and proceeded to cry, until she had nothing left.
Later, long after Rose had exhausted herself of tears, someone sat down beside her. She froze, as soon as she felt his arm brush against her. She knew that touch, but…it wasn’t possible. He was dead. She’d seen it. This was just her mind playing tricks on her. She kept her face down, refusing to look at the cruel illusion.
“Rose,” Kallias said with a sad smile, “I’m not a hallucination. I’m here.”
Rose lifted her face, her wet, bright blue eyes shifting toward him. More tears—that she didn’t even know she had—streamed down her cheeks. “How?”
“You’re not…what we thought you were,” Kallias tried to explain. “You were always more, you know. More than a human, more than a vampire. We knew you were more. We just didn’t know how.” He shrugged. “Now, we do. Or I do.”
“You…do?” Rose said. She couldn’t believe her eyes. She couldn’t make sense of it. She assumed, at this point, that she’d lost touch with reality. “How?”
“You won’t believe me,” Kallias said, “but you’re what some call a deity.”
A soft, surprised laugh escaped Rose’s lips. “Well, this is a new one,” she muttered. “Usually, my mind hates me. Now, it wants to turn me into a goddess.”
“Like I said,” Kallias said with a raised eyebrow, “you won’t believe me.”
“It’s crazy,” Rose said. “Even for one of my nightmares, this is out there.”
Kallias frowned at her remark. “You’re not dreaming, Rose. This is real.”
“She’s never going to believe you,” said a familiar voice—her tone lilting and seductive. “I’ve been trying to tell her that all day. She still doesn’t believe it.”
The Reign of Darkness Page 71