by Mj Fields
Collin pulled away from Tessa and flung open the passenger door and firmly sat her in the seat, he reached over and buckled her in. He got in and started the Jeep and threw it into drive and threw it in reverse. He peeled out following the car.
���Ignore it Collin, he���s being stupid!���
He drove quickly through the garage Lucas was two cars ahead of them paying the parking attendant. He was tapping his finger on the steering wheel rapidly. She could see the anger in his eyes.
���Collin please, just let it go.���
���He is not going to talk to you like that, you���re not his anymore,��� he hissed.
She threw the Jeep into park and pulled the keys out.
���What are you doing?���
���Collin, he is trying to push your buttons, and you���re letting him. I don���t care what he says or does. I���ve dealt with enough of him, and you are scaring me, please stop,��� she pleaded.
���Tessa give me the keys,��� he glared at her.
She handed them to him; he pulled up and waited for the car ahead to pay.
Thank God they���re taking forever, Tessa thought as she sat back
���Collin, I fell in love with you because you���re nothing like him. I fell in love with you Collin because you made me feel like I mattered. Right now, I���m not seeing that and I���m terrified, and you don���t seem to even know I���m here. Do whatever it is you need to do, wake me up when we get to my parent���s place.���
He drove fast and didn���t look at her or even hold her hand like he did before. Tears rolled down her face, and she fell asleep.
Tessa felt him unbuckle her seat buckle and kiss her head. She opened her eyes and noticed that they were on a side road about half a mile from the farm. She looked at him confused. He grabbed her hand and pulled her from the Jeep. He lifted her up and sat her on the hood.
���Tessa I need you to understand a few things. Please don���t interrupt. That ass has been in my shit all day. I���ve sucked it up and the final straw was when he stressed go first. I���m sick knowing he has touched what I want ��� that he had you for five years. I���m disgusted that he feels he can determine when you should move on,��� he ran his fingers through his hair. ���I���m going crazy thinking he knows you better, and that maybe he knows you���re not ready. I���m ready to fuck him up having heard him call you a whore, especially remembering you tell me you liked being a whore in the bedroom. I���m ready to blow Tessa. Then you lay that shit on me in the car, what���re you trying to do to me?��� Collin was angry, but she could see him searching for answers. ���This is new for me. I told you I don���t do relationships, and this feeling in my gut and anger in my head, is exactly why. The last person I loved��� she was��� I fucking killed someone because a piece of shit touched her, abused her. He thought he could��� DAMN IT! Do you understand what I���m saying Tessa?��� Tears started to flow from her eyes. ���Damn it Tessa,��� he yelled and she jumped in fear. Tessa looked at him; she didn���t know what to say. He walked away and yelled behind him, ���I know my way, I���ll walk.���
Tessa jumped down and got in her Jeep and peeled out, leaving a large rubber streak down the road and dust in his face.
She walked into the house and was greeted by a very happy tail wagging crazy dog.
���Well, hello girl, you look great,��� she hugged her and grabbed her leash.
No one was home, and she was relieved. She took Leia and walked down through the corn field. The corn was brown and almost ready to be picked. She was sure her father must be combining beans today; it was that time of the year. They got to the edge of the woods, and she made her way down the trail to the falls. She let Leia off the leash and let her play in the water. She sat down and took a deep breath and cried. This wasn���t going to end well, and she knew it. She knew it was too soon and that he was far from ready. She sat crying for a long time. Leia was tired she hoped that she hadn���t overdone it with her. She decided to let her rest before hiking back up the hill. She leaned against a tree and fell asleep.
She woke to Leia barking. She was startled and felt out of sorts as she stood up to see what she was barking at. She saw him standing next to a tree, and Leia was bounding up to him. He patted her head and walked to Tessa.
���Your brother told me he thought you might be down here.���
���Oh.���
���I was worried about you, you���ve been gone for two hours,��� he said trying to hide his annoyance.
She started walking up the trail, and he and Leia followed. They walked to the field him falling behind her purposefully he knew she was still angry and it left him feeling insecure. They walked to the driveway leading to the house.
���Tessa, would you say something please?���
���I���m tired��� she responded and continued walking.
They walked into the house silently, no one was home.
���Make yourself at home,��� she said.���I need a shower.���
She took a long hot shower and grabbed her robe off the hook, she walked out of the bathroom, and he stood up, eyes wide waiting for her to say something, anything.
���There are towels in the bathroom if you want to shower. I���m going upstairs to take a nap,��� she walked up the stairs and grabbed a pair of shorts and a tank top and threw them on and lay in her double bed and fell asleep.
He took a shower and changed his clothes. He walked up the stairs and looked in the rooms until he found Tessa. She was fast asleep covered with a quilt, he didn���t wait for an invitation, and he climbed in and wrapped his arms around her and fell asleep next to the woman he loved.
When he woke she wasn���t there, and it was almost dark. He got up and walked down the stairs, her mother was in the kitchen.
���Well, hello Collin,��� she said, ���If you���re looking for Tessa, she���s out helping her father dry beans. If you walk out and hang a right in the driveway, you won���t be able to miss it.
���Thank you,��� he said quietly.
He walked out and saw her high atop the dryer. He didn���t like her up that high. She had on some very short cut off jean shorts and a tight thermal shirt; she also wore a straw hat and black rubber boots that went almost to her knees. Again he was shocked at how hot she looked, down boy he thought to himself, she���s understandably pissed at you and her dad���s standing right there.
He walked up to her father and shook his hand. There was no use in trying to make conversation; he could tell by her Dad���s face that he knew she was angry at him. The equipment was so loud it wouldn���t have mattered if he did.
She was coming down the ladder, and he watched her carefully as he stood at the bottom afraid she may fall. She smacked her dusty leather gloves together and turned and saw him standing there. His hands buried deep in his pockets, shoulders slumped looking at her like a little puppy dog who had been scolded for chewing up a shoe. She smiled with a piece of straw in her mouth and kicked at the dirt a bit. He slowly took a step closer to her and she looked up, finally making eye contact.
He took her hands and mouthed; ���I���m sorry.���
John watched as she took his arms and wrapped them around her and hugged him. Collin smelled her hair and kissed the top of her head. He turned aware her father was standing there and tipped his head to him. Her father smiled and turned off the dryer.
���Supper should be ready in a few minutes,��� he said as he walked away.
���Tessa I���m sorry, I was an ass. I���m not angry at you, you did nothing wrong, it was me.��� C
ollin looked at the ground. ���Tessa will you please say something?���
���Do you love me Collin?���
���Yes, Tessa I do, why?���
���I just wanted to know, I accept your apology. Now let���s go eat supper��� she took his hand and walked towards the house.
He was confused but happy she had forgiven him.
Supper was great; they had corn, potatoes, and steak. He watched her the entire time and everyone was aware of it. He knew they were staring, but he didn���t care. All he cared about was whether or not she and he were okay.
After dinner she offered to clear the table, he helped her. Her parents went out on the deck and waited for the other kids to come over. She washed, and he dried, neither saying a word. She was relaxed and happy.
When they finished, he looked at her, ���Tessa, can we take a walk?���
���The rest of my family will be here soon. I���d like to see them,��� she smiled up at him, ���and I need a shower.���
���I promise it won���t take long Tessa, please?���
���Alright, after I shower,��� she walked into the bathroom and took a shower.
He walked outside and sat with her parents.
���It���s beautiful here. So peaceful.���
���It is when you���re not staring at it all thinking of what has to be done,��� John laughed.
���But when you think deeper and realize what your hard work does, you get a feeling that can���t be replicated and a smile in your heart. We feed more people with these crops than are people in our community. There���s a lot of satisfaction in that,��� Maggie smiled.
Tessa came to the door, ���You ready, Collin?���
He stood up immediately.
They walked across the main road and down a dirt road. He took her hand, and she let him.
���Tessa I know I was an ass, and you must have a lot to say to me, so please say something ��� anything.���
���You scared me today.��� He frowned as he listened to her. ���I didn���t understand if you love me why you just didn���t let it go like I asked. I���m sure of my feelings for you; I just wish you���d not scare me Collin. I talked to my dad today, and he said something about men and marking their territory. That Lucas feels because he was here first, he felt that he could call the shots. And that because of that you felt angry and well anyway. I���m sorry you were not my first physical love Collin,��� she took his hand and placed it on her head, ���but here actually knowing that you care, and here,��� she placed her hand on her heart, ���has never been touched by anyone as deeply, even though at the time I thought that Lucas and I loved each other, it wasn���t love in the true sense. We were kids. You have me here Collin, and if you think about it and let go a bit you may realize you had me here 10 years ago, way before Lucas. I hope for right now that���s enough to put you at ease,��� she smiled. He took several deep breaths managing to stop him from getting too emotional. ���Now if for some reason that doesn���t work and you���d like to piss on my leg to mark your territory, I guess I could allow that. Definitely won���t be the first though,��� She laughed trying to lighten the mood, and he hugged her. ���Please don���t be mad at me for talking to my dad. I never listened to them before. Had I listened I would have stayed at my Aunt Ann���s for a couple more week���s. Instead of watching their marriage fall apart. And probably spent a lot more time with you at the church,��� Tessa reached for his hand, ���I love you, Collin.���
���I love you,��� at that moment he knew he could never be without her.
They walked back hand in hand both looking much happier as they walked onto the back deck.
Her whole family was there, and so was Jade and Ryan.
���Where have you two been?��� Jade smirked and waggled her eyebrows suggestively.
���Just went for a walk, I have to go inside for a minute, I���ll be right back,��� Tessa excused herself, and he sat down with her family.
���So Collin, we know so little about you, tell us about your family,��� Maggie smiled.
Jade handed him a drink. He took a deep breath and took a drink; well this will save her from going through it.
Tessa walked out as he began, ���Collin you don���t have to do this.��� Tessa shot an angry glance at all of them.
���It���s okay, and this way you won���t have to,��� he smiled ���it���s ok Tessa, but thank you.���
He pulled her into is lap and wrapped his arms around her and kissed her head. He finished his beer and Jade handed him another.
He told them everything, from not knowing his father to his mother���s addiction to the neglect he endured, his problem home life spilling into school and a wake up call.
���Okay Collin,��� she said tears flowing down her cheeks, ���You don���t have to, as long as I love you, they will too; you don���t have to go on.���
He gently wiped her tears, ���I���m ok. Are you okay with this?���
���I just don���t want you to have to keep going through this.���
He smiled as he told them about his first kiss and the kind beautiful little girl with the blue ribbon.
Her sisters, mother, and Jade���s eyes were red when he talked about the murder. He didn���t give too much detail, just that he made a deal with her and that Pastor Lou watched out for his siblings.
He told them about the death of his brother that he believed was his mother and not drugs and moved to his sister���s murder.
He told them about his education and military time.
And then in detail told them what had happened just a few days ago. They looked horrified; Tessa knew she would hear about that later.
He finished by telling them about the last night of VBS, and the realization that the little girl in the blue ribbon was Tessa.
Thank God that was what their focus was on, the awe moment.
Tessa went and grabbed the album Pastor Lou had given her and they passed it around. A distraction from the horror story they had just heard. No one acted any different. They all hugged him including her father.
���You���ve overcome the impossible son. I���m honored to know you,��� John smiled.
They sat around the fire, and Jade came over and whispered in her ear ���You sure you’re okay Tessa that���s a lot to deal with.���
���Jade I���m fine, we���ll analyze him in great detail later,��� she giggled.
Jade and Ryan were the first to leave. The rest of them started to trickle out. Tessa yawned.
���I���m ready for bed,��� she announced to her parents.
���Collin can have your brother���s room tonight I already put fresh sheets and a blanket on it.��� Maggie smiled.
���Do you want to show him where it is, or can I?��� she asked sarcastically.
���Go ahead dear I���ll be up to tuck YOU in soon,��� Maggie smiled.
She took him upstairs and showed him the room. ���Sorry, it���s not what you���re used to.���
���It’s perfect,��� he took her in his arms and kissed her.
���I don���t know how I���m going to sleep tonight without you in my arms,��� she said. ���But I don���t think the warden would go for it.���
They both laughed loudly.
���I���ll be up in a minute Tessa, goodnight Collin,��� Maggie yelled up.
���Where is she?��� he asked grinning.
���Everywhere,��� Tessa said with a look of horror. ���Do you need anything before bed? She���ll probably deadbolt us in here tonight.���
He looked so happy and childlike, and she realized he had probably completely bypassed the silly teenage crush thing but then again she pretty much did too.
Tessa smiled, ���Goodnight, Collin Abraham, I will see YOU in the morning.���
She walked into her room as her mother was coming up the stairs.
���Tessa I���m not kidding about this, not under my roof, not while I am living in this house. You will not have sex with anyone do you understand me?��� Maggie told her sternly.
���Mom seriously, could you keep your voice down he is in the room five feet from here, he can hear everything you’re saying,��� Tessa pleaded.
���Well good��� that way I won���t have to repeat myself,��� Maggie said a bit louder.
Tessa heard her dad giggle from downstairs.
���Even Dad can hear you,��� Tessa continued pleading.
���That���s right, and he is downstairs, you���ll do well to remember that young lady and you too Collin,��� she said.
���Yes Ma���am,��� Collin chuckled.
���Honest to God Mom������ she started.
���I couldn���t keep you from making mistakes back then, but I will now,��� she said, ���Both of you, got it?���
���Yes Ma���am,��� they said in unison, and he giggled like a little boy which made her laugh.
Her mom kissed her head and went across the hall.
���Collin, I���m asking you,��� Maggie started,
���Good Lord Dad would you stop her,��� Tessa whined.
���Nope, sorry Tessa. Had we not screwed up back then you wouldn���t have made the mistakes you had and gone through the heartache. Sorry, I���m with her on this,��� John yelled up and then chuckled.
���As I was saying I don���t know what happened at the Cape house, but I don���t want any nonsense in here understand me?��� she said.