“So, is this something you are willing to go through with?” I ask in a voice above a whisper.
“Go through what?” she asks, sounding naïve.
“What?” I mock as I crawl on the bed toward her but keep several layers of sheets and blankets between us.
“Oh, that.” She slides further under and only lets me see her face and her fingertips. “You see, I forgot all about him already.”
“Good answer.” I lean on my right side. She opens her mouth to respond, but I place a finger across her lips. Loren can’t expect me not to touch her at all. “Can I confess something?”
“Please do,” she answers with a sigh of relief.
“There’s a side of me, that’s excited by this idea, to be honest.” I hesitate. “Of sharing you with him.”
She sits up and her face is full of curiosity and not surprise. “You’re an extremely sexual being, Alex. Were you like this when you were human?”
“I only had two partners when I was human. Since becoming vampire, it’s been more.” No human woman has ever made me want to throw her on the dining room table and fuck her.
Her warm finger runs along my jawline. “Would you want to watch?”
“No.” I’m relieved when her eyes flicker in concurrence. “And I don’t think Loren would go for that. He’s rather old-fashioned.”
“That’s pretty heavy-handed considering he’s one thousand years old.”
I laugh, grateful for the break in tension. “I mean when it comes to relationships and sex.”
“So, wait.” When she props up on her elbow, the bed sheet slides down and exposes a pink taut nipple. Damn it! “What’s the deal with this Julianna? Have you ever met her?”
“No.” I hold my fist against my lips.
“Can you tell me more about her?”
“I’m not sure I have the energy. Besides, all I know is what Loren told me.” I turn to her. “You probably figured out men aren’t always truthful when it comes to why women have abandoned them.”
“What I have figured out is women are very habitual. If she usually pops up here and there unexpectedly . . .” When I nod at her to finish, she says with a voice trembling with fear, “That means she might just show up any day. Just like Loren can smell you on me, if this Julianna shows up, certainly she would smell me on him.”
“I don’t see how she can lay any claim to him if she’s been running from him all this time.” My fingers twitch from wanting her so much. If I took my clothes off now and wanted her, she’d spread for me. Easily. “Try to get some sleep, Elizabeth.”
She rolls her eyes. “Easy for you to say.”
I filled her with too much worry. I’m so damn selfish. She has to work in the morning and then be present for Annie. I bite into my lip to draw blood. Tasting the coppery drizzle, I reach down and kiss her wildly and let my blood slide down her throat to ease her into a sense of numbness so she can rest.
Knowing Elizabeth will sleep through the night, I return to my cottage. At my desk, I let the thoughts about Loren and Julianna run their course.
Loren reluctantly confessed, Julianna got under his skin. What he feels for her kept him from mating with anyone else.
In all these years, he had no mate and no allegiant. He walks this earth utterly alone.
Feared, not loved.
As Philadelphia’s second-in-command, standing shoulder to shoulder with Christiana, that may be my fate as well.
Chapter 23
Alexander arranges my date with Loren for this Friday night. He wants it over with as soon as possible.
While he offered to take care of Annie for me, I find the idea too weird. Instead, I reach out to Theresa.
“Can’t. I got a date,” she boasts.
“Really?”
“You don’t have to sound so shocked,” Theresa huffs. “Why do you need a sitter? Just bring Annie along on your date. Elizabeth, you’ve been seeing the man for two months.”
I suspect Theresa would cancel her date in a heartbeat if I told her what I’m really doing. “Thanks, I’ll consider it.”
With no other options, I rely on my old stand-by. “Hi, Dad,” I say into my phone outside the teachers’ lounge.
He joyfully agrees and I already catalogue all the extra Christmas presents I owe him this year.
That night, I drive myself to Loren’s expensive hotel near campus. Expensive because parents who can afford to send a kid to Princeton can probably afford to stay at a five-star hotel to visit that kid.
Alex texts me the suite number which makes me uneasy. It means he can show up at any moment. If that happens, he will be seriously out of control.
Loren greets me with an easy smile, but if I didn’t know any better he appears nervous. Unfamiliar with this type of experience, I’m not sure if I’m supposed to just get undressed and lie on the bed and wait for him to take me.
I’m startled when Loren replies, “Would that make this easier for you?”
“Please don’t be offended. Nothing will make this easier for me.” I spy an open bottle of wine however, on the bar. My taste buds begin to tingle.
Loren smiles and heads that way with broad shoulders and pours me a glass. How long have women prayed for a man who can actually read their minds and respond without uttering a peep. Except if a man were inside my head twenty-four seven, there would be more consequences than benefits.
“I agree.” Loren hands me a glass.
Like the wine in our little hole in the wall, this is full-bodied and tasty. A sense of calm spreads through me, but is it really the wine?
“Are you doing that?” I ask my host.
Lifting a glass to his lips, he replies, “No. It’s that good.”
“I’ll say.” I take another sip and realize the question of how we get started still dangles in the air.
With some liquid courage, I prepare to put my big-girl pants on so I can take my bad-girl panties off. I chuckle to myself. Good grief, I’m drunk already!
“That’s certainly not how I would like to take you,” Loren says, watching me like a hawk.
I shiver at the devilish smirk on his face. My God. This man is so damn smoldering. The heights he would bring me to. Alrighty. Here we go. I put the glass down, but miss the lip on the bar. The goblet tumbles over and smashes to the floor. I move to clean up my mess, but Loren is there and stops me.
“I’ll deal with it.” He starts to scoot my body away so I can’t do any more damage, but when his hand closes around mine, he sharply remarks, “You’re shaking.”
“I’m nervous.”
“No. It’s not that. You desire me. I can sense it. There’s something deeper troubling you.”
That’s when I lose it.
Loren settles me on a nearby sofa and holds me. “Shhh. It’s okay.”
It’s really not okay. I’m losing the man I love.
“He’s losing you too, Elizabeth,” he responds to my thoughts. “This is devastating him as well.”
“I’m sorry.” I bury myself against his chest. “Just give me a minute and we can get started.”
“Elizabeth, I can’t make love with a woman who’s crying over another vampire.” He strokes my hair. “The one I made no less.”
I clutch his sweater. “Please don’t tell Alex I started crying.”
Loren tilts his head back and laughs. “Do you think he would prefer tears, over you enjoying sex with me?”
I swallow. Alex knows when I’m about to orgasm. Would he be able to tell if I hadn’t?
“Yes,” Loren answers with a killer smile. “It’s okay. I suspect he’d rather you enjoy my lovemaking than feeling miserable over it.”
I smile and nudge away from his embrace so I see his eyes. “I do want to
stay if you still want to make love to me.”
“Elizabeth, I want to. But not like this.” He stands and moves toward the window. “If I ask you something will you keep it between us?” His eyes drill into me to get my full attention. Boy does he have it. “When Alexander mates with Christiana would you consider being mine?”
No offense to my hot and sexy vampire, but holy shit what an upgrade. Yet, “No,” tumbles out of my mouth before I can really consider it further.
Loren smiles and touches my cheek. If this were a test, I passed. I belong to Alex. There’s no one else I want. Not even this devastatingly handsome creature.
“But Elizabeth, if you are ever in danger, I expect you to come to me. And if I discover someone has threatened you or your child, I will come for you myself.”
We exchange another set of glances. Loren’s head dips toward mine, preparing to take my lips, but he halts, his jaw trembling. His tongue sweeps across the lower rim and he raises his head to kiss me on the forehead. “Close your eyes,” he whispers.
Behind my lids a spring meadow appears and I gasp.
“It’s okay.” Loren strokes my back to comfort me.
A rich fragrance of honeysuckle and lavender rise up from the wildflowers all around me. A harsh bath of sunlight warms the entire field. My throat is suddenly dry.
“There’s a stream beyond the tree. Go, have a sip of cool water.”
He’s right, there it is. It sparkles and crashes against wet rocks. It sounds so refreshing and now I’m parched. More than I realized. I lean across a rock and stretch my hand into the stream.
“Drink, Elizabeth.” I turn around and Loren is behind me, in the vision.
I snap my hand back. “I’m afraid I’ll fall in.”
“I’m right here. Nothing will happen to you. Ever. I promise. Drink, my darling.”
I blink and it’s Alex. It was Loren, but now Alex’s hand is on my waist. It’s really Loren. I already tell their touches apart. My arm reaches toward the water and I bring a handful to my lips. The smell is odd.
“Drink, Elizabeth. You need it.” Loren is there again, lifting my hand so the water will flow into my mouth.
While it’s cold and pleasant tasting, it’s also thick and sticky.
“Drink,” Loren whispers.
When I open my eyes, my lips are against his wrist. He’s making me drink his blood. In a fit of fear, I try to wrench away, but he holds me.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t think you’d take it willingly.”
Shaking, I say, “Alex gave me his blood when I had the flu. Is there something wrong with me now that I need yours?”
“No, of course not.” He touches my hair and wipes a loose drop of blood from my lips while his eyes linger on my face.
“There was a minor flaw in Alexander’s plan.” He moves away from me, hoping I don’t hear the low growl in his chest. “He assumes I will stay in Princeton. I can only physically protect you if I’m here. If I can get to you quickly. But I can’t stay here, Elizabeth. I have to find . . .”
“Julianna,” I whisper.
“New York wants to abduct her. I have to find her first. Hide her. I made her. We protect what is ours. I want to protect Alexander, but injecting myself and preventing him from going to Philadelphia will start a war.” His voice drips with sorrow.
“Okay. Then what will your blood inside me do?”
“Did Alexander tell you everything about me?” Loren squeezes my hand and stands. That’s all of the broken vampire he’ll let me see.
“Just a touch here and there.”
“I’m considered the most dangerous vampire on the planet. What you saw in the bar was only the surface of what I can do. You asked what it’s like to be one thousand years old. Because of how old I am, I’m pretty well known. I enjoy the freedom I have because all other vampires fear me. Including those in New York.”
Stunned, I can only respond, “Okay.”
He crouches in front of me again. “I gave you enough blood, so any vampire who dares to try to harm you will smell me and retreat.”
“Won’t Alex smell it?”
“No. My venom flowed through him and turned his blood into my blood. He won’t smell it. But another vampire will I promise.”
“So why can’t I tell him?”
“No gift comes without danger. I’ve been around long enough to have plenty of enemies. Smelling my blood in you could make you a pawn. Except . . .”
“New York has outlawed using humans as pawns.” I heard Alex remind Francisco.
“The probability of that happening is remote. But what is happening to Alex is very real. I worry he’ll do something. Strike against Christiana or Francisco. I leave for Maryland in the morning. I have some new leads.” Loren closes his hand around mine. “My blood will keep you safe.”
I glare at him and speak my response without a sound. It better.
When I leave Loren, I feel utterly lost. Unable to figure out where to seek comfort, I consider going to my dad’s house and spend the night so I can be with Annie. Perhaps my old bed will drag me back to a simpler time. That idea made me hopeful until I read a text from him that says he brought Annie home because she wanted to read that new book Alex bought her.
I’m grateful at least to not walk in the door wobbling and dizzy from sex. Still, my dad can tell something is up.
While Annie sits on the couch next to him, he says nothing, except, “You’re home earlier than I expected.”
“Yeah. I was able to get done what I needed—” I stop because a vampire is at my door.
“Alex!” Annie bolts from the couch.
I expect my father to be wary of a new man in my life. One that captured my daughter’s heart, but my dad smiles as she flies into Alex to hug him.
“Hey, kiddo!” He holds her while bundled in his coat and his hands are hidden inside leather gloves. “Alex Manning.” He offers my father a respectful bow.
“Carl Lockspier.” My dad’s smile is wide. “Good to meet you.”
“Likewise.” Alex peeks at me with wild eyes. It’s hard to tell if he’s angry or aroused.
“I’ll get going.” My dad takes his coat from the stand and leans into me. “Goodnight.”
“Nice to meet you, Mr. Lockspier.” Alex’s reaction to my father being so close to me is calm and easy, versus when another man is near me, like Loren.
“Same here. Goodnight, Annie-bug.” He gives my daughter a final tight squeeze.
Alex closes the door after my dad leaves and our eyes lock for a moment, but I turn to Annie. “Ready for bed?”
“Okay,” she whines.
Alex and I need to talk about what didn’t happened and what that means, but I have to get my daughter settled and comfortable first. He removes his coat with soft shoulders, which shows no sign of anger that once again I put Annie before him.
She goes down easy and when I get to my bedroom, Alex is there. His suit jacket is on my bed, it’s the most comfort he’ll allow himself, I suspect. He stands at the window in his protective stance, but as soon as I close the door he pins me up against the wall. His head hovers over mine and moves down my neck. There’s a low growl in his chest, but his mouth slides over the peaks of my breasts and he tightens his fingers around my wrists.
His head lifts quickly, his eyes swimming with confusion. “What the?”
I made him speechless. “I couldn’t go through with it.”
“Were you frightened? Was he impolite?” Alex steps back and begins to pace.
Amusing. He thinks I backed out because Loren wasn’t a gentleman. I don’t want Alex to know I started crying which is what really put the kibosh on things. But on the drive home, I didn’t come up with a better excuse. I hoped Alex would just be so relieved and I
wouldn’t have to explain myself further.
“Elizabeth, darling. Why aren’t you answering me?” He’s worried about me.
Loren even alluded that Alex isn’t thinking straight because of how he feels about me.
I take his hand and sit him on my bed. “Isn’t it enough to say, that I just don’t want to be intimate with someone else? I’m not trained to fake emotion or sexual satisfaction. We know Loren can read my mind and you said yourself, he’s a gentleman. Because of how I felt, he agreed this wasn’t the right course of action.”
Alex springs to his feet, enraged. “That is not for him to decide.” He grabs his suit jacket and heads for the door.
Oh shit! “Alex, he’s gone. He left for Maryland. I think you miscalculated what Christiana would do to me. Francisco knows about me. He’s a commander like her. I suspect if he thought I was a real threat, he’d have done something by now, right? I don’t mean to insult you, but I think you’re letting your emotions get the better of you on this.”
“You’re damn fucking straight I am. I have to leave you. Here, alone. I found one of her guards in the woods behind your house. I marked you as mine. But with me gone . . .”
I try to process all of that, but, I found a vampire in your yard, is so alarming it blanks everything else out. I have to trust Loren’s blood will stop anyone from doing any real harm to me. Just me?
Crap, what about my daughter? I’m about to ask this but a shot of searing pain sends me to the carpet. “Damn it! Stop doing that!”
“No one will hurt a child, Elizabeth.” Alex somberly responds to my inner thoughts and lifts me up.
“Great.” I turn away awash with panic and new fears to haunt my dreams.
Suddenly being a vampire and not sleeping sounds like a good idea.
Chapter 24
It’s been a week since my episode with Loren.
The holiday rush makes the weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas fly by, as well as the shortened days. Before Alex, I hated this time of year. I’m a sun-lover. Bright blue skies and warm air were always my preference. But sunlight slows Alex down compared to how energized he is when it’s dark and cold. If our circumstances were different I would move to Alaska with him.
Drawing Bloodlines (The Princeton Allegiant Series Book 1) Page 20