by Sotia Lazu
Lexi looked around, as Ric went through the coffee shop’s menu. The day was clear, and the street outside buzzed with life, but only two more of the café tables were occupied. No sound penetrated the large window panes. It was like she watched a very private silent movie, in full color.
She itched to ask Ric about Exotic Beast again. She accepted he had nothing to do with it, but he knew about it, and not from her. Lexi chewed on the inside of her cheek. It would be impolite to go for it without letting him get a cup of coffee first. And maybe she didn’t want to know the answer. She and Ric had reached a place where they could talk and jest and take walks with her holding his arm and…
She did not just think that. They hadn’t taken a walk. They’d moved pedestrian-y, to where he could answer her question. End of story.
“How did you know about the site?” she blurted.
“Can we at least order first? I’ll have an herbal tea.”
“You’ll have herbal tea?” So much for the She felt every bit like the incredulous round-eyed, gaping messenger smiley that shook its head from side to side.
Ric left the menu on the table, sat back, and raised both palms. “I’ll tell you now, on three conditions. Yeah?”
That killed her mirth on the spot. “No.” She squinted at him, the suspicion Edmund’s explanations had dispelled rushing back, to flood her mind. “You already had a condition. One. And we’re here. Are you trying to get out of this?”
“No, I’m not.” He seemed hurt the idea crossed her mind. “Listen to the conditions first?” At her nod, he fisted his left hand with the thumb sticking out. “One, we order.”
“Done.”
He popped out his index finger. “Two, you hear me out. No interrupting.” She opened her mouth to protest, but he didn’t let her. “No interruptions. You hear the whole thing out.”
“And the third one?”
“No matter what, we finish our coffee.”
“Don’t you mean your herbal tea?” She snorted. His conditions were nothing sinister, and she was in too good a mood to second-guess his good intentions.
“Right. Knew I should have said four conditions.” He sucked in both cheeks, and the accentuated hard lines of his face added to his beauty.
No, not beauty.
He was hot-ish. Could be hot. Okay, was hot. Not beautiful, though.
Crap. He was beautiful, and Lexi had noticed when she first saw him.
Before he’d spoken and ruined it for her.
“I’ll have a green tea, and the lady wants a coffee. Strong, sweet, and hold the cream, please.”
His words snapped her back to the here and now, and Lexi didn’t know if she was more surprised she hadn’t noticed the waitress approach or that he knew how she liked her coffee.
Ric looked into Lexi’s eyes with such intensity, she flinched. Was he hoping to see something, or praying not to?
“Keep in mind whatever I tell you happened before the truce. Right?”
Lexi nodded, amused by his unease. She got a bit more comfortable in her seat and motioned for him to go on.
“I saw you working long hours and—well—I knew your workload didn’t justify it.” She glowered at him, and he slammed one hand on the table. “Bloody hell, Lexi, you know the shit they have you do is too easy for you.”
*
She tilted her head to the side and wrinkled her nose, but she didn’t speak. She took the no-interrupting stipulation to heart. He’d chuckle if he weren’t sure she’d forget all about his conditions and ditch him the moment he told her he’d spied on her.
“So one night, when you must have thought you were alone…” The words wouldn’t come. He couldn’t say he’d watched her masturbate and then hacked into her PC.
But Lexi looked at him so pleadingly, he had to. “I watched you. I watched you”—he struggled to find an inoffensive word, to make what he had to say less bad—“touch yourself. You were captivated by something on your screen.” A blush crept up her face. She opened and closed her mouth, and Ric knew he had to tell her the rest fast. “I had to know what got you that way. I hacked into your computer, saw Exotic Beast, and was hooked.”
The silence seemed to draw out too long, and he realized she was waiting for him to finish. “End of story,” he said.
Lexi pushed her chair back.
He panicked. “I wanted you.” As if that made it all better. He’d been an ass, and there was no excuse for it.
She stood, shaking her head.
“Lexi, please. Your coffee isn’t even here yet. You said—” He stopped there. Whatever she might have agreed to, she was well within her rights to leave and never talk to him again. “It was before the truce,” he whispered.
“I’m going to the ladies room. When I come back, we’re going to have our coffee and never mention my pleasuring myself in the office ever again. Clear?”
It was his turn to nod. He was so thankful she wasn’t fleeing, he didn’t even have the presence of mind to turn and watch her bum swish away.
****
When he admitted to watching her get off, Lexi was more than tempted to make a run for it and never show her face at work again. Then she remembered Ric was the one who’d had sex with her in a broom closet, during work hours, and she decided indignant outrage wouldn’t fly as a response.
Plus he had those puppy eyes.
She sighed and splashed enough water on her face for her color to almost return to normal. She swabbed off and then wiped the mascara that had run down her cheeks. Yup, now she looked cool as a cucumber.
On her way to the table, she could see Ric was all but bursting with nervousness. Their drinks had been served, and he held his cup in a hand balanced on his knee.
“I’m back,” she said in as cheery a voice as she could muster.
He set his cup on the table, not meeting her gaze. “I’m sorry.”
“That I’m back? I can go.”
He raised a face so stricken with remorse, she felt bad for him. “It’s okay,” she said. “I mean, it’s not okay, and you have to promise to never invade my privacy like that again, but”—she shrugged—“it was before the truce.”
“Never again, Lexi. I promise.”
“Good. With that out of the way, what will we talk about while we sit here?” She licked her lips and arched an eyebrow at him. Sex talk wouldn’t be half bad. They’d be on familiar territory, and she might get fantasy material for her alone-time.
“Meant to tell you about the guy I met with. The one I had to be in character for?” He plucked at the lapels of his leather jacket with both hands.
“Oh, that. Right.” She grinned. “Well, why are you in your Rex gear?”
“He was an associate of mine from the old days.” He winked. “I wanted to see if he’d suss out anything about the site. He didn’t. Couldn’t trace a single thing about it, and he’s the best there is.” He seemed to think for a second. “This side of the jail bars, that is.”
“Why doesn’t it surprise me IT-Richie hangs with such a crowd?”
Ric glowered. “Not hanging with them. Used to. Before…”
She could tell the subject made him uncomfortable. “We have a truce. Remember?” she asked. “I promise not to use anything you say today against you.”
He nodded. “My third year of uni—college for you—I fell in love with the wrong woman. She was wild and unpredictable, and seemed drawn to darkness. I came from a loving family, wanted to be an artist, and was too much of a ponce. Too soft, for her to notice me. So I dyed my hair, purchased every leather piece of clothing I could, and played at being a badass. I still went to my classes, though. Studied hard. I was going to ask her to be my wife.”
“She didn’t feel the same?” Lexi could tell where this was going. Like her, Ric had placed his hopes for a future on the wrong person.
He thrummed his fingers on the table, not looking at her. “She wasn’t made for the shackles of conventional relationships. She said so when I caught
her making out with some stoner she brought to my graduation party. I must’ve drunk my weight in alcohol that night. When I got home, my dad got in my face. I pushed him, and he pushed back. I was out of control. Blinded by my pain.” He met Lexi’s gaze now. “I threw a punch at him. Didn’t mean to hurt him. I was just lashing out. It caught him in the chin. I’ll never forget the look in his eyes. There was no anger, just sorrow. At what I’d become.”
His voice broke, and Lexi felt a tug at her heart at seeing him so vulnerable. “Ric…”
“He didn’t deserve that, Lexi. He never laid a hand on me, was always on my side, and I… I couldn’t handle the guilt. I mumbled an apology and ran out. Withdrew what I had in the bank, and jumped on the first plane here. I no longer played at being bad. I became bad. I got into fights, worked as a bouncer, changed my name to Rex, and ended up doing some not-so-legal computer-related work.
“Edmund came to my place one day, out of nowhere. I was hungover and didn’t remember him at first. Hadn’t seen him since I was eight or so. He smashed my nose with my own front door, then said my mom had suffered a heart attack and needed to see me.”
The anguish in his voice cut Lexi to the core. “Did your mom—”
“No, no. She’s fine now.”
She huffed a sigh. “Good. I mean, that’s great. I’m glad.”
“Yeah.” Ric smiled. “Anyway, when Edmund saw the condition my life was in, he offered me a job, provided I reformed. And this is me—a reformed man with a shady past.”
*
Lexi didn’t even frown when he told her the worst of it, and Ric was grateful.
“Everybody has a past,” she said now. “Where did the name Rex come from, though? I know it’s Latin for king, but to me, it’s a dog’s name.”
He groaned.
“You chose to have a dog’s name? Why?”
“It was chosen for me. While I worked as a bouncer, I had a reputation for being a dog.”
Lexi widened her eyes. “Oh.” Still no recrimination in her gaze. Just surprise.
“Your turn,” he said. “Why come back here? Rather, why leave in the first place?”
She grimaced. “My story is eerily similar, except Andrew didn’t give me the anti-monogamy spiel until after we were engaged. We hooked up right after college. He was charming, funny, handsome, and way into me.” She shook her head. “I thought he was way into me. He was done with his MBA, and when he got a job in New York, he proposed. My mom wasn’t half as psyched as I expected when I told her the news. I assumed it was because I’d be moving so far away.” She looked somewhere above his head, her face pinched.
Ric wanted to hold and soothe her, but held back. “Mothers have a radar for bad seeds.” It wasn’t the most inspired comment, but it made her smile.
“For all the times Mom has been vocal about her opinion, she chose this one to keep it to herself. Not that I blame her. I was head over heels, and anything she said against Andrew would just drive a wedge between me and her. I applied for a Master’s in New York, got in, and followed Andrew across the States. As soon as he started work, I stopped seeing him. Late hours at the office. Dinners with clients. Briefings. He always had an excuse, and I always bought it.”
Ric nodded. There had been signs Bridget wasn’t faithful too, but he’d turned a blind eye.
“He worked late again on our one year anniversary. He’d said he’d be alone at the office, so I packed a mini-picnic and went to surprise him. Found him sprawled on his boss’s couch, with her sucking him off. I had a bottle of wine in my right hand. I threw it at him and left. He didn’t even run after me. Just called me half an hour later, berated me for making a scene, and told me he did what was best for us. He promised it was one-time thing. That it meant nothing. He said I had to forgive him. People made mistakes.”
“You didn’t.” He hoped she didn’t sell herself short like that.
“I thought about it. I considered staying, playing house, and trying to forget my future husband cheated on me.” Her face was drawn in anger.
At herself.
“I didn’t want the hassle of moving again,” she said. “Didn’t want to have to tell my mom I’d fallen for a man like my dad. I called my best friend—she’s here in San Francisco—and she told me not to dare think about it. She walked me through packing Andrew’s stuff and leaving it outside our apartment, and two days later, she flew in to get me. If it weren’t for Angie…”
“You’d still have done the right thing. Eventually. You wouldn’t have married him.”
“No?” She met his gaze and held it. “How do you know?”
“Because the kick-ass woman in front of me wouldn’t put up with that shit.” That woman was smart and funny and independent and had stolen his heart.
Her smile didn’t reach her eyes. “Sometimes I think maybe I wanted to. Maybe I stayed in New York another year, looking for a job, because subconsciously I was hoping for a reconciliation. Not that Andrew tried that hard. He sent a couple of gift baskets. A new ring. Bigger. Instead of sincere apologies, there was more passive-aggressive crap on the cards—he thought I was more open minded than the average housewife, who measured love by fidelity; he expected me to care more about a solid future with him, than about something as trivial as a tiny, little slip; he believed I was his soul mate, but I was not cut out for a mature relationship.” She listed Andrew’s covert accusations as if she believed them.
“He was a wanker, and you’re better off without him.” The way she talked about her ex, Ric had the impression she was over him, but not over blaming herself.
“I know. Better off alone.”
“Not what I said.”
She didn’t give him time to clarify. “Edmund wanted to pay Andrew a visit, but I stopped him.”
Ric remembered the pain of his nose breaking when Pedelty shoved his door into his face. “You should have let him. Pedelty could fuck him up. In fact, give me the wanker’s address, and I’ll fuck him up. I have some business on the East Coast.”
Lexi stifled a giggle with her hand. “Ric, you growled.”
*
Discussion flowed. Lexi loved hearing about London, and how Ric was brought up to be a proper gentleman. She spoke about her childhood, her absentee father, and how Edmund filled the void in her and her mother’s lives.
“He’s been more than amazing,” she said. “I don’t call him Dad, just because I’ve associated the word with someone worthless. But you said Edmund could fuck Andrew up? And he hit you with your door? It doesn’t sound like the man I know.”
“I was blocking the entrance to my apartment. He shouldered his way in, and the door busted my nose and bruised my ribs. He sort of carried me to the bathroom, shoved me in the tub, and hosed me down until I was sober.”
“Edmund did that?” Lexi couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Was that the same man who’d treated her scrapes and scratches when she tripped and fell? The man who’d stayed up all night for a week when her mom developed pneumonia and ran a fever? She shook her head.
“You haven’t seen the other side of him. My dad hinted at stories, but I saw it for myself. Edmund can be scary.”
“I still can’t believe it. He’s always been so gentle and soft-spoken.”
“I grew up hearing how he rocked when he was young. He was my childhood hero of sorts.” His face broke into a boyish smile. “Nudged me towards painting and called me Richard of the Brush.”
She laughed. “Richard of the Brush? That’s disturbingly cute.”
“I wouldn’t talk about disturbing, love. I wasn’t the one who wanted to dye a Capuchin monkey pink.”
She let out a squeal of mock protest. “Oh, my God. Edmund told you that? I’ll kill him. He won’t survive dinner.” Dinner. “What time is it?”
Ric looked at the screen of his cell phone. “Eight thirty. Why?”
Lexi jumped up. “I have to go. Thanks for the coffee.” She didn’t really care about dinner, but she’d been having
fun. With Ric. They’d been talking—talking—for more than three hours. She hadn’t been interested enough in a guy to want to know him since Andrew, and that had ended in pain and tears. She grew since then. Learned to protect her heart. Even if it meant running away from a man who called to every fiber of her being.
She weaved her way toward the exit. She couldn’t breathe. Had to get out of there. Ric said something, as Lexi reached the glass door, but she didn’t pause. She threw the door open and walked outside.
Into the rain.
It was one of those sudden storms that give no warning. No gradual gathering of clouds. Nothing. They break out when you least expect them, soaking you to the core and leaving you with two choices—either return to the safety of indoors, or run and play in the water.
Lexi’s choice was made for her when Ric grabbed her arm. “Tried to tell you it was raining.” He took off in a light jog toward the office, dragging her with him.
She tried to shake off his hold, but he didn’t let go. His face was turned to the sky, and he was grinning. The knot in her stomach eased. He wasn’t out to hurt her. He wasn’t Andrew.
Ric’s giddiness was infectious, and Lexi allowed him to lead her to the end of the block and around the corner, into an alley. The rain was loud—so loud, she could barely hear herself laugh. She hadn’t done anything like this since high school, when she’d tried to coax Angie into following her but always ended up the only one having to explain her drippy clothes.
She didn’t care about her clothes then, and she didn’t care now, as Ric turned and pulled her against his body.
He was laughing with such unabashed glee, she had to kiss him.
*
He was happy. Fucking unbelievably happy.
Lexi was there, with him. Living it up. Feeling alongside him. Her pink-and-white outfit was sodden, outlining her lithe body. Her makeup was smudged, and her hair plastered to her cheeks, but she’d never looked more beautiful. She was a vision.
He inhaled deeply. Lexi and rain. No better scent on earth.