A magpie flew in and rested on the balcony rail outside. Ruffled by gusts, feathers fluttering, it looked dejected, yet it was free. It cocked an eye at her and exchanged stares through the glass before launching back into the air and flying away.
That would be her in a few days, free yet miserable.
Another knock on the door. The meeting. She may as well clear the air, get her thoughts off her chest, and throw something at Dankyo, if it came to that.
“Come in!” she called out grumpily, then sat up against the headboard.
First through the door was Theo Kevonis.
Oops. The little short white nightie she was wearing, with all the frills and bows and low-scooped bodice, showed a whole lot of cleavage. She tugged the sheet and quilt up to her neck.
Filing in after him came Claire, who shot her a grin and a thumbs-up, then dour Dankyo. His mouth was almost upside down.
Her fingers itched for that book. She sighed. Wait and see what he says first, then throw it. The tower of books next to her thigh toppled over as she shifted.
Last of all, Zigzag came powering in, legs going like locomotive wheels. He slid on the polished timber floor as he switched direction. Then he leaped and piled onto the bed, plowing into the books. His springy tail wagging, he looked up at her.
“I do swear that thing gets more doglike every day, Miss White.” Theo advanced, hand out to shake hers.
Miss White was so formal, and so not her. She hated it. But, there was no way she was going to be nice and tell him to call her Sofia, not now, not today, when she’d been so lonely, and ready to cry if something else bad happened.
Won’t kill me to shake hands.
With his black curls dangling across his forehead and those gray eyes, she could see why Claire had fallen for him. And the compulsion to not look him in the eyes was there again. Whenever she met Theo or Dankyo, it happened. Chicken. But this time, she struggled and stared back. A little smile caught at his lips, as if he’d seen that initial swerve of her gaze.
“Apologies.” He enclosed her hand and squeezed, “Most of this is my fault. But there was a valid reason.”
Apologies? “What do you mean?” But his smile warmed her. Maybe House Kevonis wasn’t a cold snake pit after all?
He dragged over a chair and sat, waved the others to sit also, though Dankyo instead took up position on the opposite side of the bed, hands clasped and waiting, like some sort of wooden toy soldier. No improvement there.
After glancing at him, she turned back to Theo. Claire sat on the arm of his chair and swung her leg. She’d changed. Her boots, leggings, and cute little shirt seemed a cross between assassin bodyguard and little Miss Muffet. And when Theo put his hand around her ass, hugging her hip, she barely raised an eyebrow.
“Claire told me how unhappy you are, as did Dankyo. It’s my fault, Miss White. About a week ago we received the reports on what happened at Byzantium. Dankyo had, of course, told me about your belief that you were the Clockwork Warrior. Because you were so ill and seemed merely an injured woman, I neglected to act on this. The report, however, stunned me.”
This was not sounding good. Feeling like he’d just painted a target on her forehead, she stayed quiet and listened.
He leaned forward. “Sofia, I have never had to ask Dankyo to be more protective. Never had to ask him to be more suspicious of anyone. For once, he was defending someone who could potentially prove terribly dangerous…when all our information said he should instead be doing the opposite. That person was you. You are potentially dangerous.”
Oh. Oh. So I’m a monster? She sat back farther, feeling that hard timber on her spine and her stomach clench up. Nowhere to go. Then Dankyo took her hand and patted it. She saw him mouth the words. It’s okay.
The first reassuring thing he’d done all week. Quietly she tried to free her hand, but he held on. Where was this heading?
“And so. The reports. Here.” Theo tossed a sheaf of paper onto the quilt. “Read them if you wish. I have copies.”
Zigzag bumped her with his nose, and she absentmindedly reached over and patted him with her free hand. “What do they say?”
He angled an eyebrow. “A summary? Very well. Autopsies…much of the evidence revolved around that. They found one man with every piece of the clockwork parts from his armor driven inches into his chest and stomach, and they found seven men who died of inexplicable failure of the mechanisms of their gauss rifles.” He paused, tapped his fingers slowly on the unoccupied armrest. “Which resulted in them being both electrocuted and burnt to death.”
She strived to keep her face calm, her hands still, but her mouth had dried to dust. For days, she’d tried not to remember that she’d killed. It was a mark she’d bear forever. Enemies or not, they’d been people.
“Tansu asserted that you somehow caused all their deaths. So”—he watched her carefully, perhaps to see how she reacted—“I decided, over and above Dankyo’s protests, to keep you under observation and, once you were somewhat recovered, even to try to annoy you or anger you a little.”
Understanding dawned. “So you ordered Dankyo away?” How demonic. How damnably awful. “But you let Claire visit.”
“Yes, he did let me do that.” Claire smiled ruefully, her mouth twisting to one side. “I insisted. The other was cruel enough.”
“Claire. Shh.”
She looked down at Theo and hesitated. “Sorry.”
Sofia looked from one to the other. So much seemed to go on between them that she couldn’t figure out.
“As I was about to say, yes, I sent Dankyo away to do something, and then I deliberately made sure he couldn’t return. And I’m sorry that bothered you.”
That was why he’d been gone? Not because… So he truly wasn’t upset with her. A pang of happiness hit her so sharply she didn’t dare turn around in case she burst into tears.
From Dankyo came a muted throat clearing. Theo gazed over her shoulder. He rubbed his chin hard enough that Sofia could hear the rasp, then leaned against the back of his chair. “Dankyo, I’m also sorry it has strained our friendship, but it needed to be done. And you know why.”
“Yes, sir.” He stopped patting her hand. “Though I’m not sure if Sofia understands.”
That sounded so confusing. But she’d figured it out herself. “Let me guess. You wanted to see if I would turn into a monster?”
“Yes,” Dankyo said. “He did. And he thought I would interfere. He was right.”
He was? She shut her eyes a moment. So good to hear that said.
She wriggled her fingers under Dankyo’s but then found him caressing her palm with his thumb. Mmm. Annoyance vied with bliss. The man knew how to calm her down.
Theo continued. “Yes. You’ve been under surveillance. We still don’t know what has changed about you; the tests in those papers show nothing much. The doctors found no new animalcules in your blood. And most importantly, you’ve not tried to attack anyone or alter clockworks in any aggressive way. Therefore”—he lightly clapped his hand on his thigh—“I’m allowing you to be a part of my household if you so wish. There will still be some monitoring, but you’re free to go most places from now on, providing that suits you.”
They…he wants me to stay? Her cheeks heated. The rush of delight surprised her. But what about Dankyo? She glanced up. The speculative look on his face was far better than his grumpy one.
She nibbled one side of her lip. “Can I…we talk, alone?”
“Excellent idea. Dankyo, we’ll leave you and Sofia to get reacquainted.” The flat-eyed smile Theo gave her might have been taken as malevolent on another man. “Take care, Sofia. He’s not in a good mood. Even if he’s mostly cross with me, I would step quietly if I were you.”
The quiet grunt from Dankyo went unremarked, though with one fingertip wedged over her fingernail, he wiggled one of her fingers.
So, he’s wound up, is he? Well, so was she. Treading quietly wasn’t on her list of things to do.
&nbs
p; Theo stood, then guided Claire toward the door with a hand on her back
They were such a great couple. Whereas… She shot a muted glare at Dankyo. Despite his orders, at gut level, what he’d done seemed a betrayal of sorts. Surely he could have said something, before he left?
“Can I have my fingers back? Please.”
He grunted again and released the one he’d played with but hung on to her hand.
She struggled to contain her irritation. Wasn’t love supposed to transcend employer-employee relationships? Zigzag shuffled to his feet.
Theo opened the door. The quilt shifted as Zigzag rearranged himself, but she was busy observing how nice Theo was to Claire. Even if Theo had been a bit of an overbearing ogre with his orders, he was a gentlemanly ogre.
There was a muted thud.
Oh God. Zigzag was growling and wagging his tail, while looking over the edge of the bed. If anyone could ever look like they might explode, Dankyo was it. He hissed in through his teeth.
She looked past Zigzag. Her heaviest textbook was on the floor next to Dankyo’s boot. Served him right.
The door clicked shut.
Time for some questions. She’d always had courage, just needed to dredge for it more than some people. She met Dankyo’s eyes, noting the pain there, much like her own, perhaps, though in his case it might be partly to do with a book landing on his toes.
“Did that hurt?” she asked, striving but failing to keep out the satisfied tone.
“Yes. Move over.” Before she could respond, he’d picked up the sheet and quilt, slipped in beside her and pushed her over. Now she had the big lump looming above her, propped on one elbow. His brown eyes seemed lost for a moment, shifting with uncertainty.
“What are you thinking?” Then more words tumbled out, ones she hadn’t meant to say. “Am I a monster?”
“No. God no. Never.” He reached out to delicately trace the neckline of her bodice. His irises were a strong brown. She’d always loved seeing them up close, like this. Like a traveler arriving home after years away, she felt the surge of their connection again. This was her Dankyo, not the cold fish of the last hour or so. “Sofia, can you forgive me?”
That finger of his, near her breasts… She breathed deep as heat suffused her groin, and almost wriggled but stopped herself. A smile graced his lips, then spread to his eyes, showing in the tiny wrinkles about them. Smug bastard, he knows he’s arousing me.
“Forgive you? No. Not yet.” Oh damn, why’d I say that?
“No?” The universe seemed to stop. Despite the lack of expression on his face, she figured she’d hurt him.
“I… The truth. This all bothered me, this last week. I didn’t understand why. I guess I do now, but not how you could be any part of this. I don’t understand how you couldn’t tell me anything. I mean not even a hint, just before you left on this mission, or whatever. But, still…”
Hesitantly, she reached up to run her hand over his hair, enjoying the way the soft bristles flicked under her palm, and then with her fingers she followed the shape of his face to his jaw.
We’re touching again. That alone made everything settle around her. “Talk to me, please.”
“I did send a message. Theo had it intercepted. But, I thought he might do something like this. I should have come and told you.”
“Oh.” Better. But, for a whole week she’d thought he’d abandoned her.
Dankyo toyed with a ribbon on her bodice.
“I’m not good at this, at saying feelings.” He cleared his throat. “I didn’t want to do as Theodore asked. But it was an order. Choosing between him and you was impossible.”
“Then why did you choose him?” She was asking him the hardest of questions. Her own hurt nudged her into ever deeper waters. She prayed this wouldn’t sink her somewhere she, they, couldn’t recover from. “I mean, I know how close you are to Theo. And expecting you to choose me over him is ridiculous, but…” She shrugged. The bodice moved over her breasts, teasing her nipples, and she saw him notice. “I don’t know what I’m asking.”
“In the end, I didn’t choose him over you.” He swallowed, his Adam’s apple working. “I came back here despite orders to the contrary.”
Oh. Mouth open, the depths of what that meant thumped into her like a boulder dropped from a cliff. Dankyo and Theo were as close as two peas in a pod. I have come between them. I’m sure that’s… “That makes me feel awful. I’m sorry.”
“Not pleased?”
She shook her head, stopped. “I’m not happy it’s upset how you and Theo get along, but I am happy you came back for me. Only thing is…” She whispered in a glum tone. “Did you think I was a monster, when you saw those reports?”
The way he paused gave him away.
“Oh.” She stared at the buttons on his shirt. “You did.”
“Yes, for a while. Which is why I asked if you could forgive me. Then I started to feel he was wrong, but I couldn’t prove it.”
Forgive him. She whirled through all the implications of what he’d said and what Theo had told her. Truth is, I am someone odd now. I don’t even know what I am.
She peered up at him while she played with the line of his jaw, feeling the stubble rasp her skin. Either say no, and run away, or yes, and accept reality. “I do forgive you. Thank you for explaining.”
He took her hand and kissed her fingers. “You still have to be careful. That book—Zigzag dropped it on my foot.”
She gaped. “No.”
“He had it in his mouth, and he dropped it. That was while you were angry at me, wasn’t it? And I’m sure his teeth were bigger for a while too.”
“I’m…” Zigzag?
From where he now sat at the foot of the bed, the critter panted at her, silver tongue lolling on the quilt. So innocent. But as she looked, she recognized the whisper of a connection they had to each other. And she recalled how her anger had drained from her into him just before the book had fallen.
“Oh God, I’m sorry, Dankyo. I won’t…”
“If Theo knew, he’d be unhappy. You need to control whatever this power is. For your own health as much as anything. I’d like you to think about this a while, and then tell me what we should do about it.”
She frowned. What was this? “Because?”
“Because this isn’t something trivial. Because you need to face this and work out a solution.”
“Uh.” So much for it being something she could brush aside and forget. But remembering what she’d done to all those people, merely at the wave of a hand. Cooked, electrocuted people. Dead people. What she’d done…
I don’t want to face this. Don’t want to remember. She trembled the tiniest amount.
If she said yes, he’d leave her be. “Okay, I will. I’ll think on it, like you said.”
“Good.”
The pause that followed said maybe he was wondering at the other thoughts running about in her head. He couldn’t know, though.
Dankyo tilted her head with his hand on her chin. “I’m not going to let you ignore something that almost took your life.” Steel determination shone in those words, and for a few seconds his fingers gripped her so hard it hurt.
This made her feel weirdly scared and yet also happy. To be the focus of this man’s concern when moments ago she was so lost and confused, and out in the cold… Her heart sped up, rocketing along.
Say something. “I’m not going to, Sir, really…” But…monster.
“What is it?” The frown set a little line straight down the middle between his eyes. “You look sad.”
She screwed up her mouth. “I’m still a monster. I have these things, or something, inside me.”
“My lady. Now you are getting me angry. No. Forget this notion, now. Yes, you are different, but not a monster. If I hear that again, I will be experimenting on you in ways you will regret. I have some ideas to do with nipples that you won’t like. Am I understood?”
Nipples? Ulp. For a little time, she didn’t
blink. “Okay. Not a monster. Got it.”
“Good. Now, business aside, you do recall I haven’t been able to do anything to you for a whole two weeks.”
“Do?”
She was suddenly aware of where his hand had gone—back to fingering the scooped edge of her bodice. Then he wandered that finger southward, bumping and trailing over the sheer white fabric and ribbons, toward one very erect nipple, where he stopped, a half an inch from the center. Her body responded, heating up, as if he’d pressed some secret button.
“The doctor says you’re well enough today.” He did a circle around her nipple, taunting her for sure. “After two weeks, that makes fourteen times you owe me.”
“Fourteen?” she squeaked.
“Have you turned into a parrot, woman?” He twitched an eyebrow, then pinched her nipple hard enough to make her gasp. “That means I get to make you come fourteen times before we’re even.”
“What?” Did he mean that? Well, she wasn’t giving in that easily. Not when he’d made her feel so dreadful. “In one go? Ha-ha. Besides, I don’t owe—” She went to pull away his hand, but he intercepted her and pinned her hand to the bed. Her other arm was crammed half under his side, squashed under his weight.
“Uh-uh. Naughty. Now, how do I touch that nipple?” He waggled his eyebrows.
“Maybe, you don’t?” She wriggled, trying to free herself enough to scoot up the bed. “And…I never said I forgave you this much. We’re still at a lesser phase. No sex.”
“A what? A lesser phase? No sex?” His gaze darkened. His mouth firmed. “Mischievous wench.”
“Am not!” That word coming from Dankyo was so ridiculous. She mimicked a Brit accent. “And wench? Really? Is that from your little book of jolly good come-hither lines?” She smirked. This was getting to be fun.
“Are you trying to tease me?”
“Trying?” She bent her legs up ready to thrash to the side, but he laid his thigh across hers, squashing her legs to the bed with his weight. Maybe she could worm her other hand free?
“Stop! Sofia…” His warning growl might have come from a Rottweiler, and the look in his eyes too. He shifted the elbow he leaned on a few inches higher and flattened his hand on her stray hair. Moving meant pain.
Steel Dominance Page 29